ATTN LadyEra: Does the friendzone exist or not?

[Umbrella Carp]

The only ones who can possibly bury this question for good are you. You know in your heart if there is a certain "category" of men in your life that you feel close to but just could never be in love with for whatever reason. You don't have to justify it, we would just like some clarity about its actual existence.

 

[ZeroX]

You mean do platonic friends exist?

Yes. Yes they do

 

[Idde]

I'm not a lady, but you mean friends right?

 

[Teriyaki Blues]

WTF even is this thread? Weekend ERA in full force?

The "friend zone" exists in the minds of men who can not be friends with a woman without wanting to bone them.

 

[Smurf]

we would just like some clarity about its actual existence.

Click to shrink...

we don't

 

[Deleted member 8861]

I - nonlady- thought being 'friendzoned' just meant being rejected by a friend, the hell are you on, OP.

People can reject the crushes of their friends (or not notice/ reciprocate them) and still be friends. And that happens with any gender btw so asking this question to only women is like... Wat.

 

[hombremalo]

I'm not a lady, but I can tell you there is people I want to have relation with but not romantic or sexual, they are called friends.

 

[Klyka]

You mean "Are there people that a person wants to and can hang out with but at the same time also does not want to have sex with or be romantically involved with?"
I mean, of course.
Like, it's called "being friends". That's literally why it is "the friend zone" cause you are in the "relationship status zone" of "friends"

 

[Khanimus]

You're asking if women like having friends that they aren't obligated to acknowlege as possible sexual partners?

That's what you're asking?

 

[Dark Knight]

Way to transfer the ownership of this concept to the ladies lol. As if a women says "I'm gonna keep him in the friend zone" as if the onus of that choice is on her.

 

[dark_prinny]

As a man I find friendship between women and men to be very rare. I'm talking about pure friendship.

 

[Umbrella Carp]

You're asking if women like having friends that they aren't obligated to acknowlege as possible sexual partners?

That's what you're asking?

Click to shrink...

The fact that you immediately break it down to something as reductive as sexual gratification only tells me this thread was a very bad idea on Era and I already regret it.

 

[Boddy]

Tbh I can't imagine going out with most men. Not that it matters since I'm in a very happy relationship.

The entire idea of "getting friendtoned" is pretty sexiest, since it assumes that only being friends with a woman is a negative outcome.
That getting to have sex with them is the default goal of interacting with women within your age range.

Women can obviously be friends with men, even single women, but many men aren't all that intersted in platonic friendships like that.

 

[nitewulf]

Doesn't it work both ways? I for sure have women friends that I'm only interested in being friends with.

 

[Rinse Bassfunk]

Platonic relationships exist, the idea of a "friendzone" is sexist. Not much else to it

 

[Cocolina]

The fact that you immediately break it down to something as reductive as sexual gratification only tells me this thread was a very bad idea on Era and I already regret it.

Click to shrink...

the entire concept of a friend zone is based on sexual gratification mate

 

[Umbrella Carp]

the entire concept of a friend zone is based on sexual gratification mate

Click to shrink...

Emotional gratification exists as well

 

[Gakidou]

I'm a lady wasup heres your answer:

Depends on the woman??? some women compartmentalise other people, some don't, some are allosexual, demisexual, asexual, gay, bi...
Its almost like we're the fucking same as men basically.

Personally from my point of view, i'm the type of person who is romantic with my #1 best friend ever, so the friend zone idea is pretty baffling. But i'm monogamous so its not like that relationship door is open now. If i wanna be friends with you and you go about expecting you're going to climb some sort of ladder to dethrone my cool as all fuck best friend of 15+ years partner, thats your weird terrible problem to ruin our friendship with don't waste my time. The reason we hate the term "friend zone" is its basically used by dudes trying to gamify and goal-orient both friendships and romantic relationships.

Just like men should do, women need to balance their attraction to people with the reality of how they want to live their life and if some cute guy or girl they have chemistry with aint gonna work out then you just don't pursue it. That's just being sensible and having basic self restraint.

 

[Cocolina]

Emotional gratification exists as well

Click to shrink...

getting out of the friend zone doesn't unlock emotional gratification like it does the chance for romance, the whole idea of a friend zone is pining for a romantic partner you'd either want to call your girlfriend/boyfriend if you're 15, or one that you'd like to fuck if you're an adult still using that term

 

[Umbrella Carp]

getting out of the friend zone doesn't unlock emotional gratification like it does the chance for romance, the whole idea of a friend zone is pining for a romantic partner you'd either want to call your girlfriend/boyfriend if you're 15, or one that you'd like to fuck if you're an adult still using that term

Click to shrink...

....Mmmm again, that's incredibly reductive.

 

[Cocolina]

....Mmmm again, that's incredibly reductive.

Click to shrink...

if you don't want to be reductive, don't use terms like "friend zone"

 

[MilesQ]

Friendzone... that's a word I haven't heard on a long ass time.

It doesn't exist for the most part.

 

[MirVie]

it depends on your definition of the term "friend zone". Creeper guys who pretend to be your friend in the hopes to get into your pants certainly exists, yes. They seem to operate under the illusion that if they are nice to a woman long enough the woman will finally notice them and fall in love with them, or something.

 

[NineConsonants]

Just call it the unreciprocated-feelings zone because people in this "zone" often don't stay as friends.

 

[It’s Time To Go]

Does the idea of certain men feeling women owe them sex for being their friends or just for being a decent human being exist, that's been called the 'friendzone'? Yes it does.

 

[Siggy-P]

You don't need the women to tell you it ain't real OP, I'll do it for free.

 

[excelsiorlef]

No

we would just like some clarity about its actual existence.

Click to shrink...

But for you I imagine there might be a casual acquaintance zone

 

[KillLaCam]

Huh. Guys friend zone ppl too.

 

[Randam]

Never had the feeling the "typical friendzone" person only wants sex.
They would like a relationship.

But anyways, the person in the "friendzone" put them there themselves. So..

 

[Malleymal]

I have female friends in the friend zone.. we are friends, and I will always be friends with them no matter how badly they want to take it there.

 

[Dan Thunder]

The only ones who can possibly bury this question for good are you. You know in your heart if there is a certain "category" of men in your life that you feel close to but just could never be in love with for whatever reason. You don't have to justify it, we would just like some clarity about its actual existence.

Click to shrink...

A) We don't.

B) What you're referring too is called being a friend.

 

[Dan Thunder]

Does the idea of certain men feeling women owe them sex for being their friends or just for being a decent human being exist, that's been called the 'friendzone'? Yes it does.

Click to shrink...

Hell it doesn't even have to be those two criteria. It's pretty much any female you hang around with who doesn't want any sort of sexual or romantic relationship.

The issue seems to be what the term friendzone actually means and what people who use it think it means differ wildly!

 

[Doober]

This idea that it - whatever you want to call it - exists only in the minds of sexist men with base intentions is bizarre to me. I've only been single for a couple of years now but both men and women use to the term freely to describe striking out, especially if they were let down easy and continue to hang in a common circle of friends/acquaintances.

 

[Jawmuncher]

You got your answer OP, it doesn't exist.