Era has a real empathy problem.

[Kingpin Rogers]

I've started noticing it more and more often but the responses in the Etika thread made me acutely aware of the kind of people this website has.

It's incredibly disappointing to see and leaves me questioning whether I should even stay here. Unfortunately this place is essentially the best of a bad bunch as all other forums are 10x worse especially when it comes to the stuff that actually matters.

I know nobody else will really care but I just needed to vent as it's incredibly frustrating at times, I could say more but I haven't decided I want to leave this place permanently just yet. I know you're not supposed to call one kind of paint a picture or whatever but maybe negativity just stands out more?

 

[takriel]

Agreed. I'm not sure if it's the mostly US-based focus of this forum.

I know that I'm not really capable of empathy when tired at the end of a work day, so that might contribute to my own shitposting.

 

[lazygecko]

Internet communities have an empathy problem. You're right to call it out but I don't think it's anything particularly unique to this place.

 

[vestan]

it sucks OP but that's the internet for you. anonymity is a real bitch huh.

i'd recommend taking a break and coming back when you're feeling better. social media can be a drain sometimes and you just need to tune out for a bit.

Agreed. I'm not sure if it's the mostly US-based focus of this forum.

Click to shrink...

what does the US-based focus of this forum have to do with anything? lmao

 

[Untzillatx]

it sucks OP but that's the internet for you


what does the US-based focus of this forum have to do with anything?

Click to shrink...

"Fuck you I've got mine" seems prevalent in American culture/society.

 

[BobbeMalle]

I recently noticed that internet devoided me of any empathy, it's really unnerving and makes me wanna question my behaviour more and more.

 

[Patitoloco]

When we are anonymous, everyone's an asshole. It's nature

 

[Mikebison]

This is straight fax.

 

[Donos]

does the US-based focus of this forum have to do with anything? lmao

Click to shrink...

Was wondering the same. OP is also rather unspecific.

 

[SurrenderDorothy]

No lies detected.

 

[Breqesk]

fwiw OP, the Waypoint forums are a much more empathetic place than around here, so it might be worth giving them a look.

they're not nearly as well-populated or active as Era tho, so if you're like me - I'm SandwichAnarchy over there, for the record - you'll probably find yourself splitting time between the two.

 

[fleet]

yeah. i migrated to resetera after hearing that it was left-leaning and therefore thought it'd be a nicer community. it's the same shit as anywhere else though, people using online anonymity to be unnecessarily rude/cruel/apathetic to others.

 

[Deleted member 925]

You're right and it's disappointing. But when something doesn't affect a person, they're most likely to shrug it off or not care because of privilege.

 

[Ravelle]

Take a break when you need to and stick to the sections you're comfortable with, don't hop in to threads you think will cause a strain on you.

I'm just here to talk video games, movies and TV for the most part, staying away from all the other stuff.

 

[MGPanda]

Absolutely. I love how great people are on this forum, there's great discussion and the mods are working really hard to filter the bad stuff, but the whole Etika thing was a mess. We need to fight for everyone's rights, but that doesn't mean that we should basically condemn everything and everyone that does something bad. A mentally unstable person does racist comments and then blocks everyone on his inner circle after posting what's essentially a suicide note? Fuck him, he's a bigot. A shareholder and the PR guy from a multi million dollar company host an AMA on the worst place on the whole Internet? Yeah, let's boycott not just them, but every single hard-working developer under their umbrella.

Again, this is a really nice place, definetely better than any other forum I've been to, and people actually care for the others and for the issues that matter, but there's a pretty big empathy issue in here.

 

[phonicjoy]

Its easier to plop down a hot take than putting yourself in someone else's shoes. And you run the risk of being called an apoligist if you do.

 

[AzorAhai]

Most of the world has an empathy problem.
That's why the world is currently spiraling straight to hell.

 

[vestan]

A mentally unstable person does racist comments and then blocks everyone on his inner circle after posting what's essentially a suicide note? Fuck him, he's a bigot. A shareholder and the PR guy from a multi million dollar company host an AMA on the worst place on the whole Internet? Yeah, let's boycott not just them, but every single hard-working developer under their umbrella.

Click to shrink...

i like how you try to equate the two like they're the same thing

 

[Laughing Banana]

Well yeah, people often tend to have it difficult to empathize with things that do not directly correlate to their lives.

Privilege and all that. I bet I can have a hundred things listed about stuff that I want people to care more but they just unfortunately don't.

 

[Dr Funk PhD]

Quite frankly... the internet is not your friend. It's not a substitute for a real human being who cares about you and your thoughts. If you're looking online, even on Resetera, for a genuine human connection that's a mistake.

 

[KillLaCam]

I feel like it's harder for people to be emphatic to anonymous ppl. (I have no idea what the Erika is though, I'm just talking about in general situations)

 

[Deleted member 41178]

I agree, for me it's really hard to show empathy for a stranger across the internet. I know in real life I'm much more empathic than I am here In part because I know those people and genuinely care about them and in part because I hardly ever believe what an anonymous person on the internet says and I think it's mostly said for attention.

 

[Deleted member 8852]

That's humanity for you.

Absolutely. I love how great people are on this forum, there's great discussion and the mods are working really hard to filter the bad stuff, but the whole Etika thing was a mess. We need to fight for everyone's rights, but that doesn't mean that we should basically condemn everything and everyone that does something bad. A mentally unstable person does racist comments and then blocks everyone on his inner circle after posting what's essentially a suicide note? Fuck him, he's a bigot. A shareholder and the PR guy from a multi million dollar company host an AMA on the worst place on the whole Internet? Yeah, let's boycott not just them, but every single hard-working developer under their umbrella.

Click to shrink...

This is not a good equation to make, my dude.

 

[citrusred]

What exactly are you looking for when you say empathy?

 

[Deleted member 2809]

Context matters

 

[FF Seraphim]

I feel like it's harder for people to be emphatic twards anonymous ppl. (I have no idea what the Erika thing is though, I'm just talking about in general situations)

Click to shrink...

This. Hell, people have a hard time being empathetic to people they somewhat know. It is mentally and emotionally taxing.

 

[Lant_War]

The Etika thread was fucking embarassing. People going "oh he said slurs (possibly during an episode) so I don't care if he kills himself" should be ashamed of themselves.

 

[Deleted member 2834]

Unfortunately this place is essentially the best of a bad bunch as all other forums are 10x worse especially when it comes to the stuff that actually matters.

Click to shrink...

Yeah, there's nowhere to go if you want to talk games. Places like r/GamerGhazi are tiny in comparison. You simply don't have much of a choice. r/games closes down 90% of all "political" threads because of hatred in the comments, it's just surreal. And that's one of the less shitty places.

 

[MGPanda]

i like how you try to equate the two like they're the same thing

Click to shrink...

I'm not. Not at all. Etika's issue is much, much worse than the THQ Nordic thing, because we're actually talking about people not giving a potential suicide victim the importance that it needs, and I legitimately think that I'm somewhat of an egoist by not wanting to boycott them, but we gotta face the facts. There's thousands of people depending on them, and if we were to boycott every single company run by fascists, specially European ones, we'd have to live completely isolated by the outside world. It's sad, but it's true. When I'm buying a game, I'm not aiming to support the publisher, but the developer that's being affected daily by crunch and terrible working conditions, and I'm saying this from experience.

This is not a good equation to make, my dude.

Click to shrink...

Again, just what I said over there. It absolutely isn't, but it's the first "ERA absolutely condemning something or someone with no chance of redeeming" situation I can think of.

 

[Deleted member 2913]

I agree, website was hell of a lot better on release, then it just started getting worse and worse, toxic and more toxic. Only really come on the website to see about news then bail out before another argument springs up. Tbh, just stick to OT threads.

 

[Fat4all]

i am the most empathetic

 

[Deleted member 8001]

The Etika fandom is something else.

 

[MegaBeefBowl]

People are bloodthirsty.

From "who cares if he kills himself" with Etika to the constant "lol rape" shit that gets posted whenever anyone people don't like goes to prison. It's fucking exhausting and awful.

 

[julia crawford]

When we are anonymous, everyone's an asshole. It's nature

Click to shrink...

I know this is said in jest but it's really not true. No one's nature is to not feel anything for other humans or want to be antagonistic towards everyone else. Anonymity doesn't even factor into this.

Empathy is like any other aspect of a person, it exists in everyone and must be practiced to show results. People itt saying stuff like "yeah humans are terrible", fuck off with excuse. You're wrong and you stop convincing yourself it's a good excuse.

 

[Ignis]

i am the most empathetic

Click to shrink...

good doggo

 

[Fat4all]

good doggo

Click to shrink...

FUCK YOU

 

[Deleted member 23850]

Yeah, this whole forum has become a lot meaner and callous.

 

[Veelk]

I actually want to make a topic on how we handle empathy and how it's actually NOT something you should give to everyone at all times. There are definitely times where not empathizing with someone is either the most useful or even the most morally correct. I have no idea what happened in the etika thread, but people treat the concept of empathy as if it's an absolute good they should employ at all times, and it isn't.

 

[Deleted member 7051]

Well yeah, people often tend to have it difficult to empathize with things that do not directly correlate to their lives.

Privilege and all that. I bet I can have a hundred things listed about stuff that I want people to care more but they just unfortunately don't.

Click to shrink...

I'd disagree that it's privilege. You can only care about so much at any given time. We're only human and if we cared about everything we'd wear ourselves down overnight. Obviously there are some exceptions, like things that affect or will affect us all, but when it comes to other people's lives and personal problems sometimes... you just have enough on your own plate.

I mean, you say you have a hundred things you want people to care about more but I'd wager so does everyone else.

 

[shnurgleton]

FUCK YOU

Click to shrink...

no u

 

[Fat4all]

no u

Click to shrink...

dont tempt me

 

[Deleted member 8001]

I actually want to make a topic on how we handle empathy and how it's actually NOT something you should give to everyone at all times. There are definitely times where not empathizing with someone is either the most useful or even the most morally correct. I have no idea what happened in the etika thread, but people treat the concept of empathy as if it's an absolute good they should employ at all times, and it isn't.

Click to shrink...

Exactly. Like I'm not gonna show much empathy to the Dragon Quest composer.

 

[Deleted member 17402]

Can someone tell me about this Erika discussion that I completely missed out on? What happened?

 

[woman]

Can someone tell me about this Erika discussion that I completely missed out on? What happened?

Click to shrink...

I wanna know too

 

[vestan]

I'm not. Not at all. Etika's issue is much, much worse than the THQ Nordic thing, because we're actually talking about people not giving a potential suicide victim the importance that it needs, and I legitimately think that I'm somewhat of an egoist by not wanting to boycott them, but we gotta face the facts. There's thousands of people depending on them, and if we were to boycott every single company run by fascists, specially European ones, we'd have to live completely isolated by the outside world. It's sad, but it's true. When I'm buying a game, I'm not aiming to support the publisher, but the developer that's being affected daily by crunch and terrible working conditions, and I'm saying this from experience.



Again, just what I said over there. It absolutely isn't, but it's the first "ERA absolutely condemning something or someone with no chance of redeeming" situation I can think of.

Click to shrink...

i say this with all due respect but you need to get some perspective

a few dozen people on era sticking to their guns and choosing not to support a major publisher that has had their literal head of marketing (that's still employed mind you) choosing to associate with fascists will not affect their bottom line in the end

gimme a break

Again, just what I said over there. It absolutely isn't, but it's the first "ERA absolutely condemning something or someone with no chance of redeeming" situation I can think of.

Click to shrink...

it's a fucking company dude, why are you stanning for them so much

 

[Alienous]

I think there's a natural limit with empathy. With Etika I can see how some people's empathy reserve regarding him has been depleted, but that is something that can happen even with family members. 'If you're so intent on ruining your life go ahead', that kind of frustrated sentiment.

 

[Laughing Banana]

I'd disagree that it's privilege. You can only care about so much at any given time. We're only human and if we cared about everything we'd wear ourselves down overnight. Obviously there are some exceptions, like things that affect or will affect us all, but when it comes to other people's lives and personal problems sometimes... you just have enough on your own plate.

I mean, you say you have a hundred things you want people to care about more but I'd wager so does everyone else.

Click to shrink...

Well that's true. What I mean by privilege is we all are different in terms of how has been kind to us; like generally speaking a guy in a 3rd world country like myself will have more things and problems to think about than a guy living in the US, for example.

"We can only care about so much at any given time", yeah, but a person can have only 10 things to worry about while the other has 100 things, I don't think calling it a 'privilege' is a misnomer.

 

[Tregard]

I agree wholeheartedly with this. Even on a more micro-level, I find it's way easier to get responses to your comments/threads which are negative than positive. I get that we don't want to be a hivemind, but it can be annoying when people ignore the majority of something you say to just pick at a small piece of it.

 

[Protome]

That Etika thread was embarrassing. As shitty a person as Etika is, the hand waving of "who cares if he kills himself" by so many, at least one Mod included, was incredibly worrying.

I agree with the other posters saying that empathy isn't something that you need to have for shitty people. But there is a line between not caring for shitty people and actively joking about it when they threaten to commit suicide.

 

[Ignis]

OP I think this is a wider psychological issue.

In 2019 we're all so exposed to shit news day after day that I think the majority of people, both on and offline, have become numb to feeling empathetic towards a sad situation, unless it concerns us personally.