US men, how #Metoo is affecting your dating/sexual life ?

Angel DvA · Jul 8, 2018

Several months after the #Metoo scandal, the Weinstein stuff and the rise of the feminism, I'm curious to know how those events are affecting your daily/dating/sexual life, have you changed your behavior, are you afraid to talk to girls more now ? Are you afraid about the way she could reacted with you flirting with them ? etc... or nothing really changed for you.

I want to know how you really feel about the current situation as well, about all of this things, do you agree with everything ? do you have stuff that you strongly disagree with, do you think the situation is fair/unfair etc... ?

I know we're in a era where speaking its mind can be dangerous but I want you to be as honest as possible, of course, straight sexism from both side isn't ok or even allowed but I want your opinion to be as pure as possible.

thanks

Taki · Jul 8, 2018

Hasn't affected me because I've been perpetually single before AND after #metoo arrived on the scene

jwk94 · Jul 8, 2018

I mean it hasn't. It's not hard asking for consent or at least waiting for the other party to give you obvious signs that they want you to make some sort of move. Coworkers (both male and female) are worried that it has stopped men from being their natural selves or some conservative BS, but otherwise, I haven't seen any obvious changes myself.

Rassilon · Jul 8, 2018

Why is this specific to the US?

Persephone · Jul 8, 2018

Angel DvA said:
Several months after the #Metoo scandal, the Weinstein stuff and the rise of the feminism, I'm curious to know how those events are affecting your daily/dating/sexual life, have you changed your behavior, are you afraid to talk to girls more now ? Are you afraid about the way she could reacted with you flirting with them ? etc... or nothing really changed for you.

really, OP?

Psamtik · Jul 8, 2018

Not in the least. Being respectful, decent, and generally not acting like a sexual predator isn't hard. Don't tell women to smile, and don't respond to politeness by sending pictures of your dick.

Nice to know the "rise of feminism" is such a recent trend, too. Let me hop into my time machine and give Mary Wollstonecraft and Simone de Beauvoir the bad news.

Big Al · Jul 8, 2018

Uh it hasn't?

Terminus · Jul 8, 2018

Not at all?

You get consent, then you get busy. That's how it was before, that's how it always should be. Powerful men being held accountable doesn't factor into it in the least.

R0b1n · Jul 8, 2018

Why would it change? Unless you're a creep beforehand there should be no need for change.

Deepthought_ · Jul 8, 2018

If I was rich or had any type of celebrity status I would make sure my cell phone video was on anytime I felt I was in a situation where I'm alone and it's he say she say so I have evidence to back me up

Angel DvA · Jul 8, 2018

Unit 333 said:
Why is this specific to the US?

It's where everything started.

Persephone said:
really, OP?

Yes really.

Surfinn · Jul 8, 2018

What

Why would it affect your dating or sexual life..

jelly · Jul 8, 2018

It's easy to not be an asshole so no change.

Nivash · Jul 8, 2018

Swede here, our #MeToo was pretty strong too. I'd lie if I didn't admit that it's made me even more anxious. I'm not great at reading people and I'm more worried than ever that I'm going to miss signals and come off as a creep unintentionally.

RumbleHumble · Jul 8, 2018

"I know we're in an era where speaking your mind can be dangerous"

Yup, this is definitely gonna go well.

For the record, I doubt its changed much for anyone who wasn't an asshole. I know it hasn't changed a thing for me.

Persephone · Jul 8, 2018

Angel DvA said:
Yes really.

Ah yes, us wimmin are just so irrational and crazy, we're gonna accuse men of harassment at the drop of a hat!

You realise that's what your post is implying, right?

Sho_Nuff82 · Jul 8, 2018

Nothing changed. Wasn't an abuser/rapist/creep before, I'm still not now. I have a gf, plenty of female friends, and half my office is women. It's not hard to be genuinely friends with women if you see them as people.

Blitzrules240 · Jul 8, 2018

Might wanted to think this thread through before you hit submit.

DigitalOp · Jul 8, 2018

Serious thread backfire incoming.

Abort OP Abort

Edit oh shit you doubled down. Godspeed Spiderman

ElectricBlanketFire · Jul 8, 2018

#meobtuse

Oligarchenemy · Jul 8, 2018

No because I'm not a rapist/sexual harraser

Ketkat · Jul 8, 2018

Angel DvA said:
Several months after the #Metoo scandal, the Weinstein stuff and the rise of the feminism, I'm curious to know how those events are affecting your daily/dating/sexual life, have you changed your behavior, are you afraid to talk to girls more now ? Are you afraid about the way she could reacted with you flirting with them ? etc... or nothing really changed for you.

I want to know how you really feel about the current situation as well, about all of this things, do you agree with everything ? do you have stuff that you strongly disagree with, do you think the situation is fair/unfair etc... ?

I know we're in a era where speaking its mind can be dangerous but I want you to be as honest as possible, of course, straight sexism from both side isn't ok or even allowed but I want your opinion to be as pure as possible.

thanks

What part of the #MeToo movement was about guys talking to girls? Did you miss the systematic issues of sexual assault that are in place in society that were the main focus of that movement? Why would that freak you out in any way, that you're suddenly scared about your relationships?

SuperBanana · Jul 8, 2018

Hasn't changed a thing.

WhoTurgled · Jul 8, 2018

Uh no its actually pretty easy not to harass someone believe it or not

Javier23 · Jul 8, 2018

Angel DvA said:
I want to know how you really feel about the current situation as well, about all of this things, do you agree with everything ? do you have stuff that you strongly disagree with, do you think the situation is fair/unfair etc... ?

Anything you may wanna share yourself?

RumbleHumble · Jul 8, 2018

Ketkat said:
What part of the #MeToo movement was about guys talking to girls? Did you miss the systematic issues of sexual assault that are in place in society that were the main focus of that movement? Why would that freak you out in any way, that you're suddenly scared about your relationships?

Persephone said:
Ah yes, us wimmin are just so irrational and crazy, we're gonna accuse men of harassment at the drop of a hat!

You realise that's what your post is implying, right?

I mean, c'mon OP

TheFireman · Jul 8, 2018

Not at all. Like, even if you make a bad, creepy joke in poor taste on a first date, it's not like the reaction is gonna be any more awkward because of #metoo. The only time you're gonna run into problems because of #metoo is if you're sexually harassing/assaulting people.

Kapten · Jul 8, 2018

Swede here, and as a fellow swede said earlier, our movement is strong aswell.

For me? It hasn't changed anything.
It's fairly easy not harassing anyone, and it was just as easy not harassing anyone for the past 33 years of my life.

Angel DvA · Jul 8, 2018

Persephone said:
Ah yes, us wimmin are just so irrational and crazy, we're gonna accuse men of harassment at the drop of a hat!

You realise that's what your post is implying, right?

I think you don't get what I meant, I want to talk about guys pov/feelings on the situation, I'm not saying that women are going to accused anyone on anything because of that.

show me your skeleton · Jul 8, 2018

jesus fucking christ.

if your dating life ever fell anywhere near the realm of the #metoo movement and what it stands for, you should be perpetually alone.

gaiages · Jul 8, 2018

If you don't harrass or rape women, nothing should be different.

So what exactly does that say about you, OP?

Deleted member 15737 · Jul 8, 2018

I'm curious if OP thinks men being a bit more careful on getting consent is too much of a price to pay for women feeling more comfortable at work, and being inappropriately propositioned less?

Also, feminism didn't just rise lol. All this stuff has been around, it just got more media attention (and eventually became a target of regressives) after the Weinstein scandal.

Deepthought_ · Jul 8, 2018

TheFireman said:
Not at all. Like, even if you make a bad, creepy joke in poor taste on a first date, it's not like the reaction is gonna be any more awkward because of #metoo. The only time you're gonna run into problems because of #metoo is if you're sexually harassing/assaulting people.

I think he shouldn't have use metoo instead he should talked about those who make false rape claims that make real victims look bad and who also ruin innocent men's lives

I'm thinking this is what he meant

Surfinn · Jul 8, 2018

The rise of feminism lol

Persephone said:
Ah yes, us wimmin are just so irrational and crazy, we're gonna accuse men of harassment at the drop of a hat!

You realise that's what your post is implying, right?

Won't someone think of the men?!

How am I supposed to talk to a woman now that more victims of sexual assault are stepping forward?

You know cuz there's definitely no shady implications there

Persephone · Jul 8, 2018

Angel DvA said:
I think you don't get what I meant, I want to talk about guys pov/feelings on the situation, I'm not saying that women are going to accused anyone on anything because of that.

You asked if men are more afraid to talk to women because we might react badly to being flirted with. That definitely implies you view women as crazy irrational bitches who would call the police on a guy for flirting with them.

thecouncil · Jul 8, 2018

The Rise of "The Feminism"

*rubs temples*

Speedlynx · Jul 8, 2018

Angel DvA said:
Several months after the #Metoo scandal, the Weinstein stuff and the rise of the feminism, I'm curious to know how those events are affecting your daily/dating/sexual life

It hasn't whatsoever, me being a gay guy and all.

However I will say I had an odd experience in a vape shop the other day. After browsing a little and making a purchase I unknowingly sat down in the lounge area right next to this super attractive girl that had to be in her early twenties. It was only us two there and I thought nothing of it at first but then I realized I had made a huge mistake. Did this girl think I was some creep or trying to get close to her or something? I thought about getting up right after sitting down or scooting over but that would be even more awkward.

You guys have it rough. I am so sorry.

GitarooMan · Jul 8, 2018

I wasn't a creepy harasser before so.... nothing has changed.

'3y Kingdom · Jul 8, 2018

Angel DvA said:
I know we're in a era where speaking its mind can be dangerous...

This has always been true for one group or another. What a weird thread.

Blue Sky Noise · Jul 8, 2018

never been happier to be as gay as the day is long

Stop It · Jul 8, 2018

Angel DvA said:
I think you don't get what I meant, I want to talk about guys pov/feelings on the situation, I'm not saying that women are going to accused anyone on anything because of that.

Well then, you start.

How do *you* feel about #MeToo

Personally hadn't affected me as I'm in a long term relationship but even if I wasn't, would not change anything because treating women with dignity and respect should be default and the people who are the target of #MeToo can't muster even that, before even going into the crimes committed.

ascii42 · Jul 8, 2018

Taki said:
Hasn't affected me because I've been perpetually single before AND after #metoo arrived on the scene

Same. Would have altered some of the things I did at parties and in clubs back in college, though.

Remember · Jul 8, 2018

OP, unfortunately this topic would go better on Reddit.

Resetera has a habit of dancing around the cases of false accusers abusing #metoo for a come up and also gray area cases like Aziz Ansari. In general, the movement is a great thing overall but I can see why a good person needs to be cautious from how a story can easily be manipulated against them.

Obvious · Jul 8, 2018

Persephone said:
You asked if men are more afraid to talk to women because we might react badly to being flirted with. That definitely implies you view women as crazy irrational bitches who would call the police on a guy for flirting with them.

This is the unprovoked hostility OP is talking about

Persephone · Jul 8, 2018

Remember said:
OP, unfortunately this topic would go better on Reddit.

Resetera has a habit of dancing around the cases of false accusers abusing #metoo for a come up and also gray area cases like Aziz Ansari. In general, the movement is a great thing overall but I can see why a good person needs to be cautious from how a story can easily be manipulated against them.

fdsafdsfd ok "false accusations" mmhmm ok tell me more because as we all know false accusations are SUCH an epidemic

Ketkat · Jul 8, 2018

Speedlynx said:
It hasn't whatsoever, me being a gay guy and all.

However I will say I had an odd experience in a vape shop the other day. After browsing a little and making a purchase I unknowingly say down in the lounge area right next to this super attractive girl that had to be in her early twenties. It was only us two there and I thought nothing of it at first but then I realized I had made a huge mistake. Did this girl think I was some creep or trying to get close to her or something? I thought about getting up right after sitting down or scooting over but that would be even more awkward.

You guys have it rough. I am so sorry.

You sat down next to a girl and were worried you made her uncomfortable, that's so rough..

Blue Sky Noise said:
never been happier to be as gay as the day is long

Can you explain what you mean by this a little better? Because its not like the #MeToo movement can't involve gay men as well

Remember · Jul 8, 2018

Persephone said:
fdsafdsfd ok "false accusations" mmhmm ok tell me more because as we all know false accusations are SUCH an epidemic

I didn't say they were an epidemic, nor wide spread. Read my post correctly.

Deleted member 35011 · Jul 8, 2018

Not me and I'm not American, but a friend of mine who was rather socially awkward to start with is now more scared of talking to girls than before because he thinks he's so awkward that he might end up harassing a girl while he thinks he's having a fun conversation. He's a good guy just...yeah.

(He's getting help both professionally and from us now so he'll be good and relax, hopefully)

Spartancarver · Jul 8, 2018

Not in the slightest, probably because I wasn't a creep to women before it started

Angel DvA · Jul 8, 2018

The reaction are gold as expected, keep them coming.

US men, how #Metoo is affecting your dating/sexual life ?

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