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Oct 27, 2017
10,201
PIT
So dating Era, I am in need of an advice...

I don't have plans for Halloween tonight, mostly due to a bad break up (6 months ago) that made things awkward with our friends, so now I don't have many friends in the city I live in. But I've been seeing girls and things could be a lot worse I guess...

So, I was planning to try to play until dawn alone with some candy and wine. And then it struck me, why don't I invite this really hot and cool tinder girl who i've been chatting with for more than a week, and who asked to meet 2 times already but I wasn't free...

So what say you Era? Until dawn on Halloween night as a first date? I'm asking because I know it can be a deal breaker, so don't be too harsh :)
And I don't look like the "stereotypical gamer guy", I dress well and my appartment is nice and clean

My only comment is going to your place can be creepy for girls for a first date and not in a Halloween sort of way. Ask her what's she's doing and bring up your plans. If she is positive on it then ask her if she'd like to visit? Maybe tell her to bring her favorite candy even.
 

Moodz

Member
Oct 28, 2017
352
My only comment is going to your place can be creepy for girls for a first date and not in a Halloween sort of way. Ask her what's she's doing and bring up your plans. If she is positive on it then ask her if she'd like to visit? Maybe tell her to bring her favorite candy even.

Yeah I know that, I would not invite a girl at my place as a first date usually. But the 2 times she asked we met she invited me to her place, sending me pictures of the beers she had in her fridge and shit...
I think it's on a good way to be a sex buddies situation, but I know the stigma that video games can have for some people, that's why I'm hesitant.
 
Oct 25, 2017
5,159
China
I wonder how someone ends up that way.
Like, were they born that way, or did they go through some trauma in their life, or a bit of both?
Either way, that person needs some serious psychiatric help, not just for himself, but because I can see that behavior spiraling into something even more dangerous.

Its becuase life does not work how they think it does or should. This leads to fustration and bitterness. They didnt learn and refuse to learn. Add them to communities of equally fustrated guys and a feedback of confirmation bias. Then this is the result and its on the whole these guys that make it diffucult for everyone.
 
Oct 27, 2017
10,201
PIT
Yeah I know that, I would not invite a girl at my place as a first date usually. But the 2 times she asked we met she invited me to her place, sending me pictures of the beers she had in her fridge and shit...
I think it's on a good way to be a sex buddies situation, but I know the stigma that video games can have for some people, that's why I'm hesitant.

Then I'd say go for it. If video games are a deal breaker better to find out now than later. Maybe preface saying you're playing a suspense/thriller/horror game?
 

Prologue

Banned
Oct 28, 2017
781
I had three dates with a girl that was going well the last 2 months. She ended up having a few odd moments and finally I brought them to her attention because they rubbed me the wrong way and ultimately, there has to be respect between two people.

Turns out she doesn't want to see me anymore because I make her nervous. For some reason she's always anxious around me, heart rate goes up ,ect. I asked her if she knows why, she doesn't know. She insists that she likes me but doesn't feel like its a good idea to keep seeing each other. In the past she always felt instantly at peace and at home with someone and thats what she's looking for. I asked her how did those relationships end, she said badly. I told her I would be turned off if she felt that way about me so soon because she has no idea who I am as a person. Feelings like that come with time, if it ever does. Through a persons actions during the good and the bad. I told her I didn't know what I wanted yet with her but I still wanted to see her, But she insisted that she doesn't see me as a husband and I told her to take care and we hugged.

I mean the girl was naked in my car giving me a bj like two days before lol. What kind of mind trip is this? I'd be a lot less hurt if she simply said she didn't like me for whatever reason. This just seems really odd >.>
 

Krauser Kat

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,696
That video. JESUS CHRIST, save my soul. I had to stop half way through and shove my brain back in as it tried to run away.
 
Oct 28, 2017
605
I started hitting the gym again. I'm already a fairly well built man, but I always feel more confident after a work out (for some reason).
 

kellar

Banned
Oct 27, 2017
545
Benghazi, Libya.
I have never been in a relationship, i just dont know what the hell i would talk about with anyone and getting into a relationship seems like alot of talk.
Just looking at my brother he seems to always know what to talk about and how to talk about it, especially with girls.
 

scrubadam

Banned
Oct 30, 2017
94
So dating Era, I am in need of an advice...

I don't have plans for Halloween tonight, mostly due to a bad break up (6 months ago) that made things awkward with our friends, so now I don't have many friends in the city I live in. But I've been seeing girls and things could be a lot worse I guess...

So, I was planning to try to play until dawn alone with some candy and wine. And then it struck me, why don't I invite this really hot and cool tinder girl who i've been chatting with for more than a week, and who asked to meet 2 times already but I wasn't free...

So what say you Era? Until dawn on Halloween night as a first date? I'm asking because I know it can be a deal breaker, so don't be too harsh :)
And I don't look like the "stereotypical gamer guy", I dress well and my appartment is nice and clean

Just my opinion but kinda sounds like a lame date for a girl unless she is into games. If she doesn't like video games she is going to watch you playing and thats it. Also she might get the impression that video games are more important to you than other activities which can be a bad first impression. And lastly first date at your apartment is a bit forward, kinda implies some type of phyiscality if you know what I mean.

But in the end if you aren't to invested in this girl go for it worst case scenario she passes and you move on. If it works out you have a cool chick who doesn't mind if you game and is down to spend date 1 at your place and you might get lucky too.
 

HammerFace

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
2,227
ONE MORE REP my dude
r895pt7_d.jpg
 

Ernest

Member
Oct 25, 2017
7,438
So.Cal.
I have never been in a relationship, i just dont know what the hell i would talk about with anyone and getting into a relationship seems like alot of talk.
Just looking at my brother he seems to always know what to talk about and how to talk about it, especially with girls.
Attempt. Fail. Learn. Improve. Succeed.
 

Messofanego

Member
Oct 25, 2017
26,070
UK
Yeah I know that, I would not invite a girl at my place as a first date usually. But the 2 times she asked we met she invited me to her place, sending me pictures of the beers she had in her fridge and shit...
I think it's on a good way to be a sex buddies situation, but I know the stigma that video games can have for some people, that's why I'm hesitant.
Until Dawn might be a good game to get in the mood considering all the sexual content...
UntilDawnDATASS.gif

Just ask her if she's into videogames? If not, then you're spending Halloween alone. Or just go to her place if she's already invited you twice to hers.
 

Carfo

Banned
Oct 27, 2017
1,857
i wore these ones out and i ended up getting a lot of compliments, mainly from girls.


and this is like from just 2 mins ago, i didnt put together an outfit for this, i was just chilling at home with my cardigan.
8_ADDA013-_AC78-4875-_B1_CF-_C4360_C06_A64_A.jpg



I'm not saying its going to win any prizes but there are levels to it I find. it's not just like terrible all the time.

I actually really like those in this picture. What are they called?
 

Moodz

Member
Oct 28, 2017
352
Until Dawn might be a good game to get in the mood considering all the sexual content...
UntilDawnDATASS.gif

Just ask her if she's into videogames? If not, then you're spending Halloween alone. Or just go to her place if she's already invited you twice to hers.

Thanks for the advice guys!
It turns out, I changed Internet provider today and there was a technical problem so no internet for days for me, and I have bad 4g reception in my appartment...
It means no until dawn since it's not on my hdd, no netflix and chill, no stranger things, no nothing...
And the girl is getting a tattoo in the evening and said she might not be in the mood to go out after that.
Fuck me Hahaha
 

Messofanego

Member
Oct 25, 2017
26,070
UK
Thanks for the advice guys!
It turns out, I changed Internet provider today and there was a technical problem so no internet for days for me, and I have bad 4g reception in my appartment...
It means no until dawn since it's not on my hdd, no netflix and chill, no stranger things, no nothing...
And the girl is getting a tattoo in the evening and said she might not be in the mood to go out after that.
Fuck me Hahaha
lol that's lame, well might be impetus to do something fun outside by yourself.
 

Secret Fawful

Member
Oct 25, 2017
954
USA
So, is it bad if I was liked by a really cute girl on a dating site, but I refuse to reply to her because she doesn't fit everything on a ten-page list of traits I'm looking for?

giphy.gif
 

Quantum Leap

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
5,988
California
I just don't know what the hell i would talk about with anyone and getting into a relationship seems like alot of talk.
Hahah I'm also a boring ass person. That''s why I always plan dates where you don't really have to talk much but can still connect physically (Concerts, high by the beach, etc) and completely avoid things like coffee dates. I get anxiety just thinking about a coffee date.
 

Zecria

Member
Oct 27, 2017
51
So, I just moved to a new city where I know practically no one. Any advice in how I can get to know new people and, of course, date? It's the first time I've lived in another city, that's why I'm at a loss of what to do.
 

kellar

Banned
Oct 27, 2017
545
Benghazi, Libya.
Hahah I'm also a boring ass person. That''s why I always plan dates where you don't really have to talk much but can still connect physically (Concerts, high by the beach, etc) and completely avoid things like coffee dates. I get anxiety just thinking about a coffee date.
Yep, like im all in if i want to talk about some Politics or some soviet era Jets and Guns or technology but i doubt anyone actually wants to here me go on about any of that shit lol.
 

Secret Fawful

Member
Oct 25, 2017
954
USA
Why are you on a dating site?
(a question to ask yourself)

I have severe anxiety. I also have a deep-seated belief that approaching women any other place is creepy. Also, none of my friends/housemates like going to clubs or bars, and it's easier to match based on common interests than it is to meet people and have to go through the steps of getting to know them every time, and I'm not attracted to very many people in the first place.
 

Megalosaro

Banned
Oct 26, 2017
431
Southern California
I have never been in a relationship, i just dont know what the hell i would talk about with anyone and getting into a relationship seems like alot of talk.
Just looking at my brother he seems to always know what to talk about and how to talk about it, especially with girls.

Having a conversation is easy.

Step 1- ask a question relevant to their interests. Try to avoid a yes or no question
Step 2 - Listen to their answer. Actually pay attention to what theyre saying.
Step 3 - interject something relevent to both their response and your experiences.
 

EarthBound64

User was permanently banned at own request
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
1,802
Connecticut
So, is it bad if I was liked by a really cute girl on a dating site, but I refuse to reply to her because she doesn't fit everything on a ten-page list of traits I'm looking for?

I removed all but like 20 responses in my OKCupid questionnaire, because I would get far too many "Well, you seem alright, but you answered [x] on [question that I don't care at all about and practically just chose at random], so I can't talk to you, bye."
Yes, they were most likely just excuses (that is, if it wasn't that, it would be something else), but still, it got tedious.
 

Ernest

Member
Oct 25, 2017
7,438
So.Cal.
I have severe anxiety. I also have a deep-seated belief that approaching women any other place is creepy. Also, none of my friends/housemates like going to clubs or bars, and it's easier to match based on common interests than it is to meet people and have to go through the steps of getting to know them every time, and I'm not attracted to very many people in the first place.
I used to have a little of that, not much, but a little. All I can say is to attack it head on. Go out on the dates - who cares if you don't have much in common - just go out for the sake of it, just to meet new people regardless of potential and a future. You're out, having fun, and not staying home feeling sorry for yourself. Let the date itself be the end-goal. Keep going out, flex those muscles, get better at it and watch your anxiety about it slowly fade. Not gonna lie, it'll be tough at first, but tell yourself that you're just gonna share a night out with a person who shares some interests with you and go from there. It's really not a big deal - and I'm sure you know this, but it's just something to keep in mind to help you better deal.
 

Secret Fawful

Member
Oct 25, 2017
954
USA
I used to have a little of that, not much, but a little. All I can say is to attack it head on. Go out on the dates - who cares if you don't have much in common - just go out for the sake of it, just to meet new people regardless of potential and a future. You're out, having fun, and not staying home feeling sorry for yourself. Let the date itself be the end-goal. Keep going out, flex those muscles, get better at it and watch your anxiety about it slowly fade. Not gonna lie, it'll be tough at first, but tell yourself that you're just gonna share a night out with a person who shares some interests with you and go from there. It's really not a big deal - and I'm sure you know this, but it's just something to keep in mind to help you better deal.
Oh. That's a really good way of thinking about it! I'll do that! Thanks!
 

Ogodei

One Winged Slayer
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
10,256
Coruscant
I need a tip for my date tomorrow, something i feel like i've bungled every time over the years. How are you supposed to greet a girl on a first date? My instinct on meeting new people is to shake hands which is way unromantic. Instinct for people i'm close to is to hug but that's also kind of awkward.

What do?

Girl seems into me though. Texted a few times today just over chatty stuff.
 

afroguy10

Keeping it 100K
Member
Oct 25, 2017
136
I need a tip for my date tomorrow, something i feel like i've bungled every time over the years. How are you supposed to greet a girl on a first date? My instinct on meeting new people is to shake hands which is way unromantic. Instinct for people i'm close to is to hug but that's also kind of awkward.

What do?

Girl seems into me though. Texted a few times today just over chatty stuff.

It depends.

If it's a fairly quick date from initial chatting I'd say a wave if you catch their eye from a distance and a hey when you're up close but if you've been chatting for a while and you feel a hug is something you and them would feel comfortable doing then go for it.

Thinking about it though there's no one answer to be honest, you've really just got to play it by ear, some people don't feel comfortable with hugs and some people are just huggers.

I'd say if you're unsure though, stick with option 1 of a light wave from a distance and a friendly hey up close.
 

EarthBound64

User was permanently banned at own request
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
1,802
Connecticut
Fist bump.
If you want to be more familiar, running chest bump.

Seriously though, for me, I indicate a willingness to hug (open arms), but if they don't seem interested/comfortable, smile and nod.