We both double-barrelled our surnames, but if the combination didn't sound okay we'd have kept our original names instead.
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Married-Era, did your significant other change their surname? Did you?
- Thread starter TerminusFox
- Start date
Nope :) We both wanted to keep our names so we did. When kids enter the equation we'll figure something out for them.
No, she didn't.
I never cared about it.
But our kids carry surnames of both of us, as is tradition in parts of my country.
I never cared about it.
But our kids carry surnames of both of us, as is tradition in parts of my country.
My wife didn't change her name. She says she wants to but the process is so grueling. Id prefer she keep her last name. Better chances in life with a white name than Hispanic.
I took his name mainly because it was an established family name (it helps that they're all awesome) while my family maiden name was very hard to pronounce (polish/czech roots) so my maiden name was wounded to be some throw away last name from some dude she met at 5 months preggers and she just thought to give him some kind of recognition for his support to her. In other words, he's not my dad but I had his last name. Ironically he changed it some years later. So... last names are bullshit in a nutshell so I had no qualms giving up mine for his.
No, because she has an established career and it seemed like a hassle. I don't care and never assumed she would. It's not important to me and a very minor inconvenience a couple of times at worst.
Our daughter has my last name and we didn't really discuss it more than it's what she wanted.
Our daughter has my last name and we didn't really discuss it more than it's what she wanted.
No, both kept ours, though we have a 'joke' merged last name that wouldn't actually be half bad if we both switched to it.
I honestly was happy she kept hers - the whole 'taking your husband's name' thing exists purely because women were considered men's property and I don't care to carry it on.
I honestly was happy she kept hers - the whole 'taking your husband's name' thing exists purely because women were considered men's property and I don't care to carry it on.
Interesting fact, here in Quebec (Canada), you cannot change you name by marrying someone. So EVERYONE keep their own name when they marry. This is just a Province of Quebec thing, it's not Canada-wide.
As for the kids, it's up to the parent to decide. The majority of people either use the father's name or hyphenate both name for their kids.
Technically you still can change your name for 'X' reason (name and/or surname) but it's not an easy and cheap process.
As for the kids, it's up to the parent to decide. The majority of people either use the father's name or hyphenate both name for their kids.
Technically you still can change your name for 'X' reason (name and/or surname) but it's not an easy and cheap process.
Yeah, my wife took my name.
I'm glad she did (but I never pressured her into it at all. If she didn't want to, I'd be OK with that too)
I'm just kind of old fashioned when it comes to that. Plus we want kids, and I think it'll be easier if we all have the same last name.
I'm glad she did (but I never pressured her into it at all. If she didn't want to, I'd be OK with that too)
I'm just kind of old fashioned when it comes to that. Plus we want kids, and I think it'll be easier if we all have the same last name.
Yes, she had her dad's name who fucked off when she was a baby. She was very excited to take my name and become a proper part of my family who dotes on her and loves her to bits. Her family are a bunch of assholes that we have no connection with anymore.
I think she saw it as becoming part of a good and loving family, something that she never had. It's actually really sweet.
I think she saw it as becoming part of a good and loving family, something that she never had. It's actually really sweet.
Don't tell me how to arbitrarily decide what I want!
Maybe I will just decide based on which one is numerologically better lol.
No, it's done in other parts of the world (Korea for example)
I'm guessing your father in law, also didn't 'give his daughter' away at the wedding?
More strangely my wife started using my last name for our business before we even got engaged. We knew we would get married at one point, and changing the site name, her branding etc would have been a pain in the ass.
She legally changed it like a year after we got married since it was such a pain in the ass.
I didn't really care either way tbh.
She legally changed it like a year after we got married since it was such a pain in the ass.
I didn't really care either way tbh.
My mother in law's maiden name was hrdlicka (which is also Czech), people always had problems with it
She took mine, but I wouldn't have cared if she chose not to. It seems like a really misguided, exploitative system.
Dude you have no idea, I manage a bunch of social media accounts and even accounts that are religiously bent and clearly married get the creepiest fuckers.
Our most attractive client gets dozens of creep messages a day on basically every social media handle she has.
So much of it (75%+) is old white southern dudes and young looking Indian men for some reason.
Fuck yeah she did. It was the only stipulation I placed on the 6 karet Pink Sapphire I gave her.
Honestly it's purely selfish on my part. I just wanted to floss on my family when she became Dr. Garbage
Honestly it's purely selfish on my part. I just wanted to floss on my family when she became Dr. Garbage
She took my name, but I already told my daughter she can keep her name if she wants to when she gets married.
I personally wouldnt have cared, hell, I'd even been OK with making up a new last name for my kids, like "Danger", or "Awesomo"
I personally wouldnt have cared, hell, I'd even been OK with making up a new last name for my kids, like "Danger", or "Awesomo"
Yes I did. I am very traditional like that. We gave serious thought to combining our names to create a new surname too.
I thought this article is quite interesting, in that the opposite tradition in China/ Korea of not taking the husband's surname is also a form of patriarchy; also talks about the history of the feminist agenda through KMT and Communist eras:
For Chinese Women, a Surname Is Her Name
For Chinese Women, a Surname Is Her Name
Not married yet, but have talked about it plenty, and I'm almost positive she wants to keep her last name and that's perfectly fine with me.
ThisisResetEra'sspouses.gif
My wife took mine, even though I said I didn't mind if she kept hers. I dunno, just felt weird to me, like I was taking something away from her if I let her take my last name or something, haha. Her biggest reason for doing it she said was that when we have kids, she would want to have the same last name as them also, and I guess hyphenating can cause a lot of confusion/weirdness with identification or something?
Anyway, yeah. She took my last name.
Anyway, yeah. She took my last name.
I took my husband's (both male), because, honestly, I liked his name better and thought hyphenation would be a little clunky with our names. He was mostly ambivalent as to what we did with our surnames, so I got the final say in that, ha.
There were some traditions I was unable to argue against.
I told her she could do whatever she wanted and I was gonna support her choice. She thought about talking both of our last names but then decided to just take mine. She said that would have been to much work to write out haha.