Do you now have a higher chance of dying young? What i mean is, you had cancer but got cured, right? So doesn't that just reset the clock?After I got cancer, I just don't feel good about being in a long term relationship, given the possibility that I may die sooner than anyone thinks. Needless to say, that definitely extends to having children. Totally unfair to check out on a kid when they are young. I live a weird lonely life as a result. I date casually, and sometimes definitely long for something more long term, but I have to take a step back. But, its my new normal now.
Well I think marriage would only happen on the prior understanding that kids are a no-go. Similar to Seik ruling out marriage with his partner from the start, you'd need to make clear from the get-go your position so you don't get married and then your spouse is suddenly surprised of your opposition to kids; it wouldn't be fair on them otherwise.
Of course. Marriage is just a ceremonial with a huge economic aspect attached to it. The commitment is all in our head.I was a bachelor at 31 and was happy with that life......
....now I'm 36 and my GF and I have been together 5 years and just welcomed our first child a few months back and I'm even happier with this life. It's so much work but so rewarding.
I doubt we will ever get "married", as in the ceremony and stuff, but we've lived together for 4.5 years and have been common law for 3.5 years, which is basically the same thing.
I was diagnosed in my late 30’s. Although they did get the main tumor out, my staging indicated there may be a possibility of metastasis. I was unable to complete chemo, which have increased the possibility of killing any stray cancer, because I am extremely allergic to the main backbone chemo drug. So since, I’ve had the cancer pop back up in a lymph node, that was removed. So, I know it can come back.Do you now have a higher chance of dying young? What i mean is, you had cancer but got cured, right? So doesn't that just reset the clock?
At what age did you get cancer, what type of cancer and how old are you now?
If you don't want to discuss this i can understand. Just curious. There are plenty of people who had cancer and who had kids afterwards.
Dude... nothing sadder than this comment. Don’t let finances control the ‘partner’ aspect of a relationship.
Oh we absolutely already are. We get a lot of "you already have the kid, when are you getting married?" type of nonsense.Of course. Marriage is just a ceremonial with a huge economic aspect attached to it. The commitment is all in our head.
Some people need a diamond ring for that apparently. I've been together with my girlfriend for 25 years now. We see no reason to do the ceremonial.
But you will be judged by others.
This made me sadTurned 30 this year and never even been on an actual date. Being introverted and not going out to party, clubs or bars and being an overweight man does that. Now if I say I'm interested in all the marriage and family stuff, it feels daunting to start working towards to at 30. I feel like one should be 20 when they start workign towards it. Working towards it meaning first losing weight, becoming a better version of yourself, making yourself attractive to the opposite sex, then dating around a bit to find what kind of person you are interested in, then sticking with someone for some years, moving together, getting married, having a kid. That sounds like about a decade to me, and it just sounds hard to pull off at 30.
Also realistically speaking a lot of women my age would have kids already, or in general have a lot more lived life and history. Since I haven't dated I don't even really know if I'm gonna be a cool, chill guy about all that or if I'm one of those people who would feel insecure about the other person having a lot more experience than me, and then me working through that first and everything.
Dating, the final frontieer.
Yeah. Hadn't really thought about the subject in a while to be honest. Had a nice gig doing work I really enjoyed doing for about half a year but that contract just ended like 2 weeks ago, so now I have more time and energy to think about this other side of life and I was feeling a bit moody :P