Anyone here in/ has been in an online relationship?

[shan780]

never personally done it, but one of my best friends has had 2 that i know of
from what i know, they didn't work out because they could only very rarely meet up, which wasn't very satisfying for either of them

I'm pretty well-liked by streamers on Chaturbate when I go there, but aside from that, none that I can recall.

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is it possible to upvote a post on era

 

[Puck Beaverton]

I'm pretty well-liked by streamers on Chaturbate when I go there, but aside from that, none that I can recall.

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This cuts deep

 

[brokenmachine]

Back when I was like 15 on maplestory. Obviously didn't workout but I enjoyed it at the time.

I wouldn't recommend it as an adult that's for sure.

 

[Lulu]

Myspace days but that's dumb.

 

[SweetBellic]

I haven't... Nor do I imagine a sustained LDR being satisfying. Sounds more like torture honestly, if you'll permit a bit of romantic hyperbole. Physical contact is vastly preferable. Im not just talking about sex either, but even face to face interactions are just so much better. I've been very spoiled that all of my relationships have started at school or work with women who live only a few miles away.

That said, I understand the motivation to make things work with someone you really click with online, especially with no other prospects on the horizon.

 

[Cilla]

Yep! My ex-husband was from England and I Australia and we met online. Were together for 10 years. I went there for a year and he moved here permanently. It didn't work out but not because of the online just because he was a dick.

I swore off them but ended up finding my soul mate accidentally online. He's American and I will be moving there once I graduate. I've been there and he has been here. If you are both committed and have an end date it can work.

 

[TI92]

Actually met a girl on omegle, the random chat site. I was 16 and she was 14 and we were in this weird online relationship thing. Would talk on the phone and videochat often. Fell apart as we got older. She's still in my phone contact list thanks to google and I do wonder sometimes about chatting but idk might be weird.

 

[siddx]

No not really. I did exchange nude images and emails with a girl I met on a dating site but had never met in person but only because I'd be able to see her person eventually after my trip ended. After meeting her in person and sleeping together for a few weeks though she turned out to be a...unique person.
I would never have an online only or online majority relationship. Sounds like a waste of time or a way to hide from having a real relationship.

 

[Foffy]

Im confused. Your best friend is online? You've never met.

To put it bluntly, if its just online, its not a relationship.

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The fact that there is any sort of connection between two beings would automatically make it a relationship of some sort. They've also "met" if we're going to be a bit anal in regards to what counts as communication. The advent of the internet is breaking the barriers between people in a geographical sense, though as ever the issue of manufacturing one's "self" is perhaps a greater issue online than seeing them in person, day after day. The person you spend countless hours talking to might also live like a pig, for example, which wouldn't show up in voice calls.

 

[//ARCANUM]

I was full on catfished once.

So yes.

 

[TI92]

I was full on catfished once.

So yes.

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omg same, on tinder by a girl who was in my math class over one summer!!! it was so weird!!! made the rest of that class so awkward

 

[Deleted member 13328]

No never, I don't think I could handle it. I was in a relationship where she lived like a three hour drive away We could only see each other every three weeks or something like that. And this was before social media so it didn't last that long since we could only talk with each other over text or calling, so the lack of intimacy and having the person close killed it.

 

[Messofanego]

Yes, and it was a mistake that I'm glad I learned from about online long distance relationships not being worth it.

She was a teacher in South Korea, and messaged me first in June 2017. I wondered why someone from so far away was messaging me. She thought I was cute and seemed more sensitive than other guys. We got to talking and she said she would be back in UK in 10 months. We had long Skype calls, shared intimate details with each other like sharing our sexual abuse history and other issues, but then I started seeing her be clingy. She didn't like that I was not exclusive with her, that I would go on dates because I can't be exclusive to someone I haven't even met yet. She would get more demanding to talk more on Skype and then she decided it wouldn't work. She wasn't comfortable And suddenly started thinking we didn't have chemistry even though you can't really determine that until you've met. So we decided to not talk from Sept 2017 to when she came back in April 2018. Coincidentally, I started dating my now-wife in February 2018 and we got engaged in April. She then gets back to me asking if she could meet up. I tell her I'm taken now and then we cut off contact. A bit rude to not ask how I'm doing or anything general, she just wanted to know if I'm still single and then stopped talking when she couldn't get what she wanted.

 

[Biske]

Plenty of times.

None of them worked, most of them were in my teens, so the teenageness mixed with the onlineness, was mostly a bunch of fantasy nonsense.

Had one as an adult, was a real true relationship, actual conversations, skyping went and met them. Great friends to this day but having an online only or long distance relationship just doesn't work.

I'm sure it could work for some people, if thats what they both wanted and were dedicated to but thats the like .1 percent I'd assume.

 

[Sai]

yup, met my GF online and we were long distance for 2 years. thankfully we were able to make it work with a lot of dedication and effort!

the idea is that you start planning to meet and be in the same city or things will just peter out and that's a waste of both your time.

 

[DarkCronos]

Sort of. I met my girlfriend on an online forum. We were good friends and talked almost everyday for about a year. Then she moved into my city (not because of me, but to go to the university). At this point I realized she was more than a friend to me and I confessed. We dated for almost a year and then we decided to move in together. We lived together for 9 years.

Then, a year and half ago, she had the chance to move to Japan to improve her Japanese. So our relationship has gone back full cycle to an online one. But we are still committed to making it work, we talk over messaging apps and voip everyday and every 3 or 4 months I go to visit her in Japan or she comes to visit me back in Italy.

 

[Mauricio_Magus]

I'm currently in a LDR which pretty much means it's online, it's fine, you just have to find someone you can trust and talk with a lot. We call everyday on Discord and support each other a lot.

Of course, the important part is to talk about the future and what you two expect of it, work for it.

 

[Zackat]

When I was younger, yep. Loved her very much. It ended in such a sad and terrible way that it is still difficult to talk about.

I should have really gone to therapy after it, but for some reason I never made it there. Maybe I still should.

 

[Chaos2Frozen]

How is it going? How did it go? How did you meet? Do you think it is/ was worth it? If you've never been in one, how do you view it from the outside?

I never intended to fall for my best friend but i realized one night, laughing hysterically, that holy shit, im in love with him. Doing the online thing rn and just looking to hear some experiences from others.
I know theres a million fish in the sea blah blah its not like my only interaction w people is via online. Which is why when i get the courage to tell people they look at me like im a crazy person.

But yah lemme hear your stories and thoughts

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Completely worth it.

No more crazier than any other relationship, just that you know, you may never see that person in real life and you just kinda have to accept that.

 

[Alwayscrazybacon]

I was in one back in 2014. She not only lived in another different country, she lived in a whole 'nother damn continent. I'm from Mexico and she's from Thailand. A beauuuutiful asian lady all around. I still cannot believe someone that gorgeous looked at me since I don't consider handsome... nor ugly either, just average. We meet on Tumblr and rapidly became very good "blog friends" since we shared similar interests. Then we begin talking intensely for hours and hours through videocalls on Skype. One day we chatted for almost 10 consecutive hours! Beginning at 12 am and finishing almost at 10 am. Yeah no sleep at all for me due to time zones, but it was SO worth it. We officially became a couple and we lasted several months like that. It was super nice and I didn't mind no sleeping everytime I talked with her at all. I was genuinely in love with her. She then begin saying that she will come to visit me during the holidays (she is financially stable and had some money saved) so we begin doing some serious planning for it, I was super hyped.

But as every online-only relationship, if you are not 10000000% commited to it, things can get misunderstood pretty fast since they don't know you personally and you cannot explains things properly face to face either. Some family issues started to arise over here so I stopped getting online frequently. Naturally she begin asking why and doubting of me thinking I stopped caring about her when in reality I was going into a depressive state at that moment due to personal health and financial issues. I only mentioned that very briefly to her but it seems it wasn't enough and took it personally, so after a month or so, she deleted me from all social media sites. I was totally devastated because I couldn't explain to her what was exactly happening over here. I still have the drafts of that long email message I wanted to send her hoping she could understand me but in the end I decided to not bother her anymore and move on.

BUT THEN, after a year or so later, she sended me a tweet out of nothing... and long story short: We've been in good terms since then :) No longer as an official couple, but still openly sharing our feelings towards each other up to this day since we're both still single. We don't talk frequently anymore but we still get in touch every few months or so. We've come to terms that being this far away of each other will practically make a healthy serious relationship impossible. Unless we had the money resources which I unfortunately don't have, and she doesn't either anymore since she just recently bought her own house. We're planning to have a skype/netflix night on new years' eve so yeah.

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There's a curveball, in all your posts in the dating topic you never mentioned she was an online girlfriend.

 

[Cormano]

Yep! My ex-husband was from England and I Australia and we met online. Were together for 10 years. I went there for a year and he moved here permanently. It didn't work out but not because of the online just because he was a dick.

I swore off them but ended up finding my soul mate accidentally online. He's American and I will be moving there once I graduate. I've been there and he has been here. If you are both committed and have an end date it can work.

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I was in a similar situation, i met my ex online. I moved from Mexico to the US just to be with her. Met a couple times, got married, and less than five years of marriage we got divorced, we have two kids so i get to deal with her until theyre both over 18.

But yeah, if youre commited it can work.

Yes, when I was young. Moved to Alaska to be with her when I was 18, lasted 3 months and 20 years later I'm still stuck in Alaska. My advice: don't have online relationships unless you want to live in Alaska.

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Damn, im stuck in the USA for another 16 years, i love Mexico too much. Having kids is what keeps me here and ill make sure that ill provide for them. Can i ask why are you still in Alaska?

 

[Deleted member 28131]

Yep, on Runescape when I was 12.

 

[supermarioworldE]

The few women that actually talk to me on those sites and would wanna meet up always live way outside my area, so I've had plenty haha.

They don't really last long though. Or if they do, we chat less and less as time goes by.

The reality is that text conversations can only go so far.

Ideally, dating sites should be used for finding potential matches and setting up dates to see if you click offline sooner rather than later. Otherwise one or both parties will likely get bored of the text conversations and move on to the next person, or the messages become less frequent and you lose the level of interest you started with.

 

[Koo]

They can work, but you definitely need to meet up within a few months to year tops for it to go anywhere.

 

[Fat4all]

hit me up

 

[atomsk eater]

I've been in a few, mostly casual. My latest online relationship is turning into a marriage, after living together for a year and a half.

After we had met IRL a few times I was surprised at how annoyed I was to have to go back to steamchat and discord for daily flirting. But I didn't have a whole lot tying me to where I was, so I donated a bunch of stuff and threw out even more and moved what was left over. I think that kind if commitment of someone eventually needing to basically uproot themselves contributes to a lot of ldr failures.

 

[Novoitus]

I was in one like 5 years ago. I spent a fuck ton of money to go and see her. Her family was fucked up (abusive but she was also abusive towards them), she got kicked out of her home the second week I was there because her and her sister got in a fight and spent like 4 days living in my hotel room. They let her come back home. I flew home. About 2 weeks later, she was permanently kicked out of her home.

I didn't want her to end up on the streets so I paid for a plane ticket for her to come to me even though I wasn't close to ready to living with someone else.

I lived with her for about 5 months. It was fucking awful. I paid for everything, she didn't get a job until the last month we were together, and she cheated on me twice.

It was obviously more complicated than what I just said as all relationships are but yeah, I was an idiot. I learned a lot even though I wish I never went through it.

 

[Darksol]

Met my wife online. We lived 13,000 km away from each other at the time. Tough at first, but as long as you're making tangible plans to bring the both of you together, it's possible.

 

[Pet]

I've been in a couple. Still good friends with some after a decade.

I met my husband online, and obviously it went just fine because I married the love of my life.

 

[Rory]

Im confused. Your best friend is online? You've never met.

To put it bluntly, if its just online, its not a relationship.

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Why would an online interaction not count as a relationship?

When a woman who has 5 boyfriends at once hangs out with each of them, that's a relationship because it is offline, but as soon as something goes digital it loses the right to be an honest and upright relationship?

 

[Alwayscrazybacon]

Why would an online interaction not count as a relationship?

When a woman who has 5 boyfriends at once hangs out with each of them, that's a relationship because it is offline, but as soon as something goes digital it loses the right to be an honest and upright relationship?

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I suppose it's considered role-playing if there is no physical or real life interactions component. Are we all in a relationship on this forum for example or on the discords?

 

[Vincent Grayson]

I suppose it's considered role-playing if there is no physical or real life interactions component. Are we all in a relationship on this forum for example or on the discords?

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I mean...yes. As soon as you're having any kind of interaction with someone, there's a relationship there. The question is, what is the nature of that relationship and do both parties recognize it accurately for what it is.

 

[Jakenbakin]

Yeah I was as a kid. Of course I thought it would work because it's how my mom and step dad got together, they didn't meet for like a year and were 5000 miles apart though, so ymmv. But the internet was very different when they met on Slingo.

 

[CaviarMeths]

I have once. We met playing an MMO and live on different continents, so all interactions were via chat. Lasted about a year. That was in 2009-2010 and we're still friends and chat here and there (though with Discord now instead of MSN).

For me, my needs for actual physical contact are pretty low, so it didn't take much of a toll on me to be so distant, but I understand that it's very hard to maintain that kind of relationship for most people.

 

[Deleted member 9035]

"Online relationship" sounds like an oxymoron.

 

[Silav101]

Three LDRs across the years - two became serious enough that they eventually moved over to the Netherlands for long-term relationships. Hah, those two are a combined total of 15 years worth of being with someone, and I am now married and have a kid with the last one.

It works, but you have to know what you're getting yourself into. It's very different from the usual type, and you have to be extremely up front and communicative, as well as being able to handle significant amounts of time with only online contact.

 

[Alwayscrazybacon]

"Online relationship" sounds like an oxymoron.

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I think there's two ways people are defining online relationship. Meeting online and only being online. You can meet online (through apps) but it becomes real fast. Online LDR is another but people meet when they are able and decide then if they progress.

 

[Rory]

I suppose it's considered role-playing if there is no physical or real life interactions component. Are we all in a relationship on this forum for example or on the discords?

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You are always "playing a role". Be it mother, father, partner, single.

It does not matter whether you interact online or offline. Any kind of interaction is you deciding how much of yourself you reveal to the partner you interact with.

Why would it be less meaningful online than offline?

Indeed I'd claim that an offline interaction is usually way more filled with white lies and facades (make up, fancy cloth at first dates, the pick of really expensive restaurants to make the other person believe you can afford that regulary) than online because you dont see direct reactions.

You can be honest, as your honesty cant (necessarily) have any consequences on your reallife. And even if it fails, its less hurtful because it didnt happen in reallife.

 

[Shadybiz]

Yeah for a bit. Met a girl in a chat room back in like 1997. Pretty sure she was indeed who she said she was, because we started talking on the phone, too, and that was before voice harmonizer technology was as good as it is now.

Anyway, she was in Canada (Ontario, I think), and I was in NJ. It was never going to work. MAYBE if we were older at the time, and we actually had the resources to see each other, it could have worked, but the timing was not there.

 

[Gakidou]

Been online LDR with someone for 12-ish years? That's how long we've known eachother at least.
I always figured it counts because we talk to eachother every day, share most aspects of our lives with eachother, play games with eachother, have feelings for eachother, help and support eachother, adapt our routines to eachother, and I don't really consider myself willing to dedicate *more* time and energy than that to anyone else in my life I guess.
If you don't consider that a "real relationship" then uh.. ok? I guess I have an "online" then???

It's going great idk, feels nice to have someone who gets you and is there for you and you always got another person to share experiences with. It means you have to be pretty independent and able to look after yourself, but I wouldn't want it any other way and I honestly recommend that regardless. The perks are you rarely have to compromise, you can go out when you want, work overtime, eat meals whenever, live your dreams, and just leave eachother messages or rants or serenades or jokes as you please. Me and my partner have really, ridiculously similar values and interests and his unbridled sass makes me laugh.

 

[Kayotix]

Met my now wife 20 years ago on Web TV! (random chat room)

I was in Wisconsin she lived in Texas. For 2 years we talked alot via phone and emails and visited each other a few times a year. I decided to move down and thankfully it all worked out!

Married for 12 years now with a 5 year old son :)

 

[Regulus Tera]

Been five years in a long distance relationship (USA/Argentina). About to move in with her next week. Pretty excited about it!

 

[Hektor]

Congrats on the sexting OP

 

[I Don't Like]

Yeah back in the day your boy had a ton of AOL GFs. I was a bit of an e-man-whore. What can I say? I was young and wanted to explore.

Shortly after I graduated to a visual chat called The Palace and it really got serious. The girl and I had a split avatar that we would turn on and then position next to each other to join the two parts and make it look like one. Wild times.

 

[Deleted member 2809]

It's pretty miserable.

 

[Cokie Bear]

When I was like 13/14 I'd hang out on mobile chatrooms, had a couple of 'girlfriends'. But really all that meant was we'd chat and occasionally phone each other for phone sex.

 

[Android Sophia]

Me and my current significant other are in a long distance relationship. We met online and became friends, and we've been dating for two and a half years. We've met in real life too, but both of us are going through college right now. End goal is to hopefully move in together.

 

[Admiral Woofington]

Congrats on the sexting OP

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Doesn't matter had sext

 

[HellforLeather]

Why would an online interaction not count as a relationship?

When a woman who has 5 boyfriends at once hangs out with each of them, that's a relationship because it is offline, but as soon as something goes digital it loses the right to be an honest and upright relationship?

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Let me clarify: I meant a romantic relationship.

 

[Advc]

There's a curveball, in all your posts in the dating topic you never mentioned she was an online girlfriend.

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Oh yes yes, but no curveball at all cuz that girl I mentioned on the dating topic was ANOTHER one. She lived on the same city as I do and all but that particular "relationship" was absolute failure because she was always avoiding me and coming with excuses to never go out with me, yet stupid me still was hopeful she would change. That was on 2017, this ciber-relationship was in 2014-ish. My love life just sucks overall.