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Autistic ERA |OT| Slippin' on by on ASD

OniLinkPlus

Member
Oct 25, 2017
561
Dammit Niantic, why?!

God I want Autism Speaks to get shut down. The sooner the better. For now, the best we can do is inform people to not support them. Maybe eventually their donations will start drying up and they'll cave.
 

Kthulhu

Member
Oct 25, 2017
9,557
Do we have a Discord? If not I'd be willing to make a server if anyone is interested.

I don't want to take discussion away from the thread, but if anyone thinks they would use it I'd be willing to set one up.
 
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JonnyDBrit

JonnyDBrit

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,113
We've got one, though it's fallen out of use to be honest. I have the discord invite, which was decided on as a means to avoid potential intrusions.
 
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JonnyDBrit

JonnyDBrit

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,113
Updated the thread on the gaming side with that. As said there, I appreciate what looks like a desire to support more autistic charities in future. That said... yeah, avoiding Autism Speaks in their response entirely is a bad look.
 

KefkaFFVI

Member
Aug 4, 2018
1,268
California
Yeah. I'm not entirely sure how I could respond to Niantic'a tweets. Like, I have respect for ASAN but I'm not sure what Niantic could do with that information--unless ASAN already volunteered to sponsor an event but I don't think they're that big.

Like, autism speaks is big; no other organization can compare to their scale. Sp if Niantic is looking for another organization to fill their shoes, I'm not sure if it exists. So I'm at a loss at what to tell Niantic that isn't the same they already heard since the original tweet two weeks ago. :/

I know someone on autistic Twitter (Errol... Kerr I think is his name? I know he's associated with Game Assist and has a blog called Criptacular) was contacted by Niantic by DM. They caught him at a bad time when he had to take his night meds so he's sleeping (his in UK, not US), but I'll wait to see if he says anything interesting tomorrow.
 
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JonnyDBrit

JonnyDBrit

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,113
It doesn't help that, as I understand it, there really isn't much in the way of a central, formal organisation for this sort of thing in the US as there is with either the National Autistic Society - as a private charity - or CAMHS - as a national provider of mental healthcare (for the young) in the UK. Autism Speaks gets by in part on pure brand recognition and established connections, which are very important in managing what are otherwise heavily regional services.
 

KefkaFFVI

Member
Aug 4, 2018
1,268
California
It doesn't help that, as I understand it, there really isn't much in the way of a central, formal organisation for this sort of thing in the US as there is with either the National Autistic Society - as a private charity - or CAMHS - as a national provider of mental healthcare (for the young) in the UK. Autism Speaks gets by in part on pure brand recognition and established connections, which are very important in managing what are otherwise heavily regional services.
Admittedly, even as a USian, I don't know the details. But, yeah, it wouldn't surprise me if that's the case.
 

Kthulhu

Member
Oct 25, 2017
9,557
There is an organization in Phoenix, Arizona that helps people with ASD find housing and jobs. I saw a PBS piece on it awhile back.
 
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JonnyDBrit

JonnyDBrit

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,113
So I've had... a day, to put it mildly. A day that has made me really, really convinced of something I've kinda observed for the last year or so, but I'm absolutely certain of it now:
We need fucking crisis training.

As in, people with autism need much greater access to tutelage, whether through personal or professional sources, with specific regards on how to handle a 'crisis' - anything bad happening really - and how to respond in a productive fashion. Because this evening I've had to deal with two people separately being on the verge of a breakdown as the world hoisted yet more crap on them and they just... couldn't bring themselves to deal with it. Simply observing the fact they were in trouble and concluding they were screwed, even though once I got them to hear me out, we could relatively easily work through a plan on how to handle each of their issues; one had their internet cut out and simply could not wrap his head around how to access his bank account without using his computer, due to it being the only device on which he kept his username remembered. Fortunately I was able to guide them through the process of signing in through their bank's 'forgotten your username?' feature after confirming it had one through some google-fu, but the simple initiative to even try and find that solution was just... not there, when it desperately needs to be, as opposed to shutting down in the face of adversity because of the brain just not wanting to deal with this mess. This is sadly and frustratingly not the first time I've had to act as guidance for either of these two, and it so often comes back to that root issue: They're panicking and they not only don't know what to do, but they don't know how to figure out what to do. While I realise this is utterly selfish of me to then say, but being stuck in that role so often is just draining, and I feel like I have an increasingly small amount of time to myself as I'm instead having to regularly keep an eye out for and concern myself with whatever issues may be arising for these two this time; what time I do have is often spent trying to de-stress and unwind from the latest catastrophe, rather than to truly enjoy myself.

That's ultimately not meant as an indictment of them in any way, but as a realisation of yet more area in which society and its care of persons like us is so particularly lacking; any knock-on effects of that I lay at the feet of the fact people just aren't provided that sort of support before it becomes so bleeding necessary, because of how then makes it harder for us - either directly or indirectly - to simply get by in life.

I may or may not have been needing to vent a bit on this.
 

Kthulhu

Member
Oct 25, 2017
9,557
So I've had... a day, to put it mildly. A day that has made me really, really convinced of something I've kinda observed for the last year or so, but I'm absolutely certain of it now:
We need fucking crisis training.

As in, people with autism need much greater access to tutelage, whether through personal or professional sources, with specific regards on how to handle a 'crisis' - anything bad happening really - and how to respond in a productive fashion. Because this evening I've had to deal with two people separately being on the verge of a breakdown as the world hoisted yet more crap on them and they just... couldn't bring themselves to deal with it. Simply observing the fact they were in trouble and concluding they were screwed, even though once I got them to hear me out, we could relatively easily work through a plan on how to handle each of their issues; one had their internet cut out and simply could not wrap his head around how to access his bank account without using his computer, due to it being the only device on which he kept his username remembered. Fortunately I was able to guide them through the process of signing in through their bank's 'forgotten your username?' feature after confirming it had one through some google-fu, but the simple initiative to even try and find that solution was just... not there, when it desperately needs to be, as opposed to shutting down in the face of adversity because of the brain just not wanting to deal with this mess. This is sadly and frustratingly not the first time I've had to act as guidance for either of these two, and it so often comes back to that root issue: They're panicking and they not only don't know what to do, but they don't know how to figure out what to do. While I realise this is utterly selfish of me to then say, but being stuck in that role so often is just draining, and I feel like I have an increasingly small amount of time to myself as I'm instead having to regularly keep an eye out for and concern myself with whatever issues may be arising for these two this time; what time I do have is often spent trying to de-stress and unwind from the latest catastrophe, rather than to truly enjoy myself.

That's ultimately not meant as an indictment of them in any way, but as a realisation of yet more area in which society and its care of persons like us is so particularly lacking; any knock-on effects of that I lay at the feet of the fact people just aren't provided that sort of support before it becomes so bleeding necessary, because of how then makes it harder for us - either directly or indirectly - to simply get by in life.

I may or may not have been needing to vent a bit on this.
I totally get where you're coming from. I used to be (well, still am sometimes) like your friends. It's not an easy skill to learn. In hindsight I wish my special education classes had covered it more.
 

OniLinkPlus

Member
Oct 25, 2017
561
That really sounds like me. A lot of the time, when I run into problems, I have no idea how to even begin to look for a solution. Dammit brain, you need to start actually doing some work up there! What am I paying you for if not to think?!

In other news, October was garbage. My maternal grandpa (the one who doesn't hate me) passed away in the first half of the month, and my dog who I've had for 13.5 years (we got her as an emotional support animal for me) passed away on Halloween which is her favorite holiday. ;-; I'm amazed I haven't had a meltdown, but that just kinda makes me afraid I'm going to have one.

In happier news, I just bought a ton of stim toys off stimtastic and hopefully they'll come soon! Their chew necklaces have been so handy (and kids at the school I work at are always curious) so I'm hoping these toys will be just as great.
 
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JonnyDBrit

JonnyDBrit

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,113
And then to bring in some frustrating but... oddly kinda validating? News, there's this:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-46070692

The key quote:
Prof Sir Michael Marmot said they die 15-20 years earlier than other people due to poor housing, low incomes, social isolation and bullying.
Let there be no doubt this shit has consequences on our lives.

Edit: And then I've had the frustrating realisation that at least one person out there is going to use this to justify their anti-autistic attitude, even though the issue is in society's reaction (and lack of support) for such conditions.

Edit 2: You know what? I kinda feel like posting this as its own thread because it's otherwise not gonna garner enough notice. 2
 
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Kthulhu

Member
Oct 25, 2017
9,557
So, some good news and bad news for me.

Bad news: it's been two weeks and I've heard nothing from the recruiter.

Good news: my girlfriend got a second job and we may be able to get an apartment anyway. It'll take a long time to save up, but I might be able to finally move out with her.
 

Kthulhu

Member
Oct 25, 2017
9,557
Has anyone here been to a protest before? The idea of going to one is kind of nerve racking to me. I'm worried I wouldn't know what to do.
 

OniLinkPlus

Member
Oct 25, 2017
561
Kthulhu I'm heading to a protest today. I've been to one once before, I kinda just stood around and contributed to taking up space. If you can, I guess shout some chants with everybody else? No biggie if you don't, though. Just taking up space is quite effective. You may also want to bring noise cancelling/dampening headphones and check for nearby places you can go to take a break, such as fast food restaurants. Bring a water bottle too!
 

CatDoggo

Member
Oct 25, 2017
565
Tumblr deciding to more or less doom itself is really bumming me out. The autistic community on there is one of the few where I feel like I really belong and I met pretty much all of my current friends on there. It's going to suck if Tumblr goes down or if the community starts to vanish until its a shell of itself thanks to the people behind Tumblr being a bunch of fuck ups.

I gave up on most other autistic communities over the years mostly for having the same issues that gaming does, that it's male dominated, tends to be kinda sexist, filled with dudes looking for reasons to shout women down when they try to talk about their own experiences, and has a habit of trending dangerously close to the alt-right. Proper moderation would go a long way to fixing a lot of these problems but mods being sympathetic to these views and having that obnoxious 'free speech no matter what' attitude that ruins so many sites has let the alt-right fester in autistic spaces. Autistic people were always the perfect targets for nazi types and the fact that so many communities just let them worm their way in annoys the hell out of me.

Last I heard, the autistic subreddit has started going full incel with the mods doing nothing about it and with some of them apparently being incels themselves. I already disliked that subreddit for being relentlessly negative and filled with so many self-hating autistic people that it just became depressing to read. I fully bailed when I found a thread with a post at something like 300 upvotes saying that low functioning autistics should be forcefully sterilized and that it should be a heavily pushed option by doctors for high functioning autistic people. The dude was saying that he was going to get himself sterilized soon because he was not going to risk passing on his 'disease' to his children and that the faster we get autism to die out of our genetics the better. Said it was important that we find a way to screen for autism before birth so that they can start aborting them like we do for down syndrome. While I'm not anti-abortion, people who view abortion as a way to weed out 'undesirable' traits just creepy me the fuck out. Oh, and of course the one comment calling the dude out was downvoted too. Ugh, reddit.

I find Wrong Planet to be a bit of a mixed bag too. I got an email from them recently that said they were going to do more to start cracking down on sexism and racism, but some of the stuff I saw on there back in the day has left such a bad taste in my mouth that I really don't want to go back.

While the Tumblr community is far from perfect, I do wish there were more communities out there like it. We need more diverse autistic communities that are less free for alls and doesn't court crappy internet ideologies. Being autistic doesn't give you a free pass to hate women, minorities, and even other autistic people. Hate yourself all you like, but don't peddle your genetic purity shit at a community that you think shouldn't exist. And no, you're not more 'woke' for falling for 'bio-truths' and all of that other garbage. You didn't find a secret truth about the world that being a 'logical' autistic person let you see. You're just a hateful piece of shit, or at the very least, you've fallen for propaganda that was intentionally made to target someone like you.
 

KefkaFFVI

Member
Aug 4, 2018
1,268
California
I'm with you with the tumblr community. I haven't talked a whole lot about myself, but there's a lot of autistic-related issues I had and the autism-tumblr community went a long way to getting me out of the shell. Even now, I still don't feel comfortable disclosing my diagnosis irl for reasons I can't quite put into words yet (which, being gay, I'm perfectly being comfortable being out of that closet. It's weird). Anyway, this isn't about *me*, other to say that autism-tumblr community really does mean a lot and helped me more than I can put into words. I genuinely don't know where to go if tumblr falls apart.

Twitter will probably be my backup. The autistic folks I follow there are fine, but twitter just seems like a place where it's hard to relax and just be yourself like tumblr is. IDK, maybe I'm just reading too much into things--but I definitely *do* feel more comfortable on tumblr. Wrong planet, r/autism, and r/aspergers. And I love y'all here, I really do--you're all really lovely people but also like... we're not exactly the most active hangout, y'know?

I just hope that tumblr doesn't fold because of this move, but between the fact that a lot of their userbase is there for nsfw content (and people leaving can have a domino effect that affects sfw blogs) and a beyond broken af algorithm I feel I can only hope :<
 

CatDoggo

Member
Oct 25, 2017
565
I'm with you with the tumblr community. I haven't talked a whole lot about myself, but there's a lot of autistic-related issues I had and the autism-tumblr community went a long way to getting me out of the shell. Even now, I still don't feel comfortable disclosing my diagnosis irl for reasons I can't quite put into words yet (which, being gay, I'm perfectly being comfortable being out of that closet. It's weird). Anyway, this isn't about *me*, other to say that autism-tumblr community really does mean a lot and helped me more than I can put into words. I genuinely don't know where to go if tumblr falls apart.

Twitter will probably be my backup. The autistic folks I follow there are fine, but twitter just seems like a place where it's hard to relax and just be yourself like tumblr is. IDK, maybe I'm just reading too much into things--but I definitely *do* feel more comfortable on tumblr. Wrong planet, r/autism, and r/aspergers. And I love y'all here, I really do--you're all really lovely people but also like... we're not exactly the most active hangout, y'know?

I just hope that tumblr doesn't fold because of this move, but between the fact that a lot of their userbase is there for nsfw content (and people leaving can have a domino effect that affects sfw blogs) and a beyond broken af algorithm I feel I can only hope :<
I forgot to mention it in my last post, but the aspergirls subreddit is pretty chill and small enough that a lot of reddit's worst tendencies doesn't really hit it much. It's one of the only places on reddit that I saw trans issues getting talked about without the discussion turning into thinly veiled transphobia. Threads do get brigaded on occasion because it wouldn't be reddit without dudebros feeling like they need to tell women off, but you can usually tell when it's happening because posts will be upvoted or downvoted way more than what's normal for that sub.

It does bother me a bit though, because this is exactly what I was getting into. I'd rather have a welcoming autistic community for all than autistic women being forced to create their own walled off spaces because the larger communities can get so hostile.
 
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JonnyDBrit

JonnyDBrit

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,113
Agreed on the wariness on tumblr going down, and the need for a positive autistic community. It is, as I'm fairly sure we're all aware, pretty dang easy for folks to fall into something of a negative feedback loop, without proper encouragment and support. Even putting outside how inactive this particular community is here, we're also just not very large either. I cannot even begin to claim this thread as having much influence or impact. Tumblr and reddit though? Massively do, and the latter encouraging eugenics narrows the field of good options substantially.

So yeah, I second twitter as a backup. I mean, it's still twitter, but it leans into the anecdotal end of things in a fashion not too dissimilar to tumblr, though it is also more readily vulnerable to trolls. A good account to follow is Aoife Dooley; positive in a cautiously tempered kinda way, diagnosed last year and very much coming from the perspective of the bias against women getting diagnosed.
 

CatDoggo

Member
Oct 25, 2017
565
Apparently there is some effort going on to get the Tumblr autistic community onto what amounts to a refugee Discord, like what happened when Gaf died, so that we have somewhere to go if the site does eventually go down, but I haven't been able to get a link to it yet.

I've got a small Discord channel that I use to chat with a couple of friends, but I've never liked using larger ones because it becomes hard to follow and 'live chatting' with anonymous people is my definition of hell. It comes with all of the fun of social anxiety along with people being way more likely to be a bunch of dicks toward you cause its the internet. So in larger Discords, I pretty much never talk in chat and that pretty much kills the community aspect of it for me.
 
Aug 22, 2018
124
NC, US
I want to introduce myself. Hey, I'm columbodotjpeg and I have autism. I finally got diagnosed at 26 and now I'm trying to go through school because every time I've gone to college previously I've not done well! I'm working on getting accommodations now with a very cool disability counselor! She's d/Deaf and was very patient with me with regard to me having problems thinking quickly. We signed a bit but mostly the interpreter helped. I'm really happy now even though it's taken me a while to get this sort of help. I've been able to make peace with the fact I'll probably need support through my life.
 

OniLinkPlus

Member
Oct 25, 2017
561
I want to introduce myself. Hey, I'm columbodotjpeg and I have autism. I finally got diagnosed at 26 and now I'm trying to go through school because every time I've gone to college previously I've not done well! I'm working on getting accommodations now with a very cool disability counselor! She's d/Deaf and was very patient with me with regard to me having problems thinking quickly. We signed a bit but mostly the interpreter helped. I'm really happy now even though it's taken me a while to get this sort of help. I've been able to make peace with the fact I'll probably need support through my life.
Nice to meet you, and congrats on your diagnosis and on getting support at college! That's excellent news! I hope this time, now that you know a bit more about yourself and have support, college goes wonderfully for you :3
 
Aug 22, 2018
124
NC, US
Thanks for the welcome! As far as accommodations, so far so good. I'm roughly about a level 2 with moments of having the energy to mask up to a level 1 according to the psychiatrist who diagnosed me. I'm curious about communication aids though. Does anyone else use anything like this or have any advice about starting to use them?
 

Yunsen

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,175
I got two accommodations when I started taking classes in college: longer time to take tests and being given a separate room to take tests by myself. I haven’t used either of them in awhile though.
 

CatDoggo

Member
Oct 25, 2017
565
Seriously, fuck Reddit to the sun and back. An article pops up about how Amazon is selling books about how to 'cure' autism with a bleach solution and rather than care about how misinformation like this could cause a parent to hurt or fucking outright kill their kid by making them drink literally bleach, the entire thread is filled with people defending Amazon's right to keep the book up and to do otherwise is just SJW censorship. One of the highest rated comments is about how this is all just outrage culture and any comment telling this person exactly why its such a bad idea to keep something this dangerous up is downvoted heavily. It's legit one of the most upsetting threads I have had the displeasure of reading on there in awhile. Kids through no fault of their own could be hurt or killed because of this bullshit but that sure as shit doesn't matter to the assholes on reddit.
 

Injustice45

Member
Oct 29, 2017
257
Seriously, fuck Reddit to the sun and back. An article pops up about how Amazon is selling books about how to 'cure' autism with a bleach solution and rather than care about how misinformation like this could cause a parent to hurt or fucking outright kill their kid by making them drink literally bleach, the entire thread is filled with people defending Amazon's right to keep the book up and to do otherwise is just SJW censorship. One of the highest rated comments is about how this is all just outrage culture and any comment telling this person exactly why its such a bad idea to keep something this dangerous up is downvoted heavily. It's legit one of the most upsetting threads I have had the displeasure of reading on there in awhile. Kids through no fault of their own could be hurt or killed because of this bullshit but that sure as shit doesn't matter to the assholes on reddit.
What? When did this book come out? What's the title?

That's not how it works. A bleach solution? They're trying to get innocent people killed out of not only ignorance, but pure malice as well.
 

OniLinkPlus

Member
Oct 25, 2017
561
Ah yes, Magical Mineral Supplement. The actual worst "medicine". This should go without saying, but DON'T FEED YOUR CHILDREN BLEACH! Then again, these are the same parents who think vaccines are evil and being autistic is suffering.

The anti-censorship crowd is infuriating. They seem to have no consideration for the genuine harm that can be caused to people for no positive gains. People selling a scam that seriously harms and even kills children? Can't get rid of that, that'd be CENSORSHIP, and CENSORSHIP BAD! Andrew Wakefield's studies turned out to be completely faked? Can't retract that, CENSORSHIP BAD! There's a significantly underage character in a video game that's being sexualized? Can't change that in localization, CENSORSHIP BAD! They have a singleminded devotion to this single issue and completely ignore the humans affected in the process.
 
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JonnyDBrit

JonnyDBrit

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,113
And that's even before considering the shenanigans where it turned out Amazon allowed people to donate to anti-vaccination groups on checkout (though I think they stopped once people started, y'know, actually noticing). No oversight on shit like this only brings about harm.

Meanwhile, in some lighter distress, I have a bunch of holiday time I'm taking as I otherwise hadn't for the year, and am trying to figure out just where to heck to go with it. Am UK based so somewhere in Europe seems easiest to arrange, but like, do I go for seven days so I can best enjoy wherever the heck I turned up? Three days so that if I don't handle it so well it's not as long to be back in familiar territory? As an aside to all that, pricing for holidays is a load of bollocks, given they don't show stuff like bag check in up front.
 

CatDoggo

Member
Oct 25, 2017
565
What? When did this book come out? What's the title?

That's not how it works. A bleach solution? They're trying to get innocent people killed out of not only ignorance, but pure malice as well.
Here's the article in question.

https://www.wired.co.uk/article/amazon-autism-fake-cure-books

I've personally known about this whole 'alternative cure' thing of bleaching your kid to 'cure' them for years, but I didn't know it was getting mainstream enough to get books published about or that it would get on amazon where there are plenty of people reviewing it positively. There's people on there saying its a great alternative to what 'big pharma' has done to their kid. It's absolutely nightmarish. These people think bits of their kid's intestines coming out from the bleach messing up their inside as proof they're getting rid of toxins and parasitic worms. It's just, ugh.

But nooo, we need to make sure desperate parents can keep finding damaging info like this.
 

Injustice45

Member
Oct 29, 2017
257
Here's the article in question.

https://www.wired.co.uk/article/amazon-autism-fake-cure-books

I've personally known about this whole 'alternative cure' thing of bleaching your kid to 'cure' them for years, but I didn't know it was getting mainstream enough to get books published about or that it would get on amazon where there are plenty of people reviewing it positively. There's people on there saying its a great alternative to what 'big pharma' has done to their kid. It's absolutely nightmarish. These people think bits of their kid's intestines coming out from the bleach messing up their inside as proof they're getting rid of toxins and parasitic worms. It's just, ugh.

But nooo, we need to make sure desperate parents can keep finding damaging info like this.
I just read the article and it's horrifying. These books are providing false information and nothing's being done to remove them. I fear for those that are dealing with those so-called "treatments" and "solutions." I'm baffled. What's going through their minds right now?
 

Kthulhu

Member
Oct 25, 2017
9,557
Seriously, fuck Reddit to the sun and back. An article pops up about how Amazon is selling books about how to 'cure' autism with a bleach solution and rather than care about how misinformation like this could cause a parent to hurt or fucking outright kill their kid by making them drink literally bleach, the entire thread is filled with people defending Amazon's right to keep the book up and to do otherwise is just SJW censorship. One of the highest rated comments is about how this is all just outrage culture and any comment telling this person exactly why its such a bad idea to keep something this dangerous up is downvoted heavily. It's legit one of the most upsetting threads I have had the displeasure of reading on there in awhile. Kids through no fault of their own could be hurt or killed because of this bullshit but that sure as shit doesn't matter to the assholes on reddit.
Was a major subreddit or something?
 

Hercule

Member
Jun 20, 2018
1,738
If there ever was a cure would you take it?

Autism really, really sucks but I feel that without it I wouldn't be me anymore.
 

Kthulhu

Member
Oct 25, 2017
9,557
The technology subreddit. I'm pretty sure its up there as one of the bigger ones.
That sucks. I was hoping it'd at least be an obscure one, not one of the defaults.

If there ever was a cure would you take it?

Autism really, really sucks but I feel that without it I wouldn't be me anymore.
I personally wouldn't, but I'd understand if someone wanted to. Not everyone can pass for NT or can be self reliant.
 

OniLinkPlus

Member
Oct 25, 2017
561
If there ever was a cure would you take it?

Autism really, really sucks but I feel that without it I wouldn't be me anymore.
Never. While there are struggles, overall being autistic has been a very positive experience in my life. I genuinely believe that if I were not autistic, I would most probably be a terrible person.
 
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JonnyDBrit

JonnyDBrit

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,113
I'll say I'd never want a cure, but am also more than ready to admit I have been fortunate enough to actually get a somewhat ideal level of support over my life. Thus my bigger issue with the concept is how the pursuit of such a thing is used to justify doing anything but actually, properly supporting autistic people now, in the belief that it wouldn't be necessary anyway if such a 'cure' were to exist out there, somewhere. Nah, a globally barebone infrastructure riddled with shit like shock therapy is totally acceptable in the meantime.
 

Ac30

Member
Oct 30, 2017
11,770
London
Does anyone have any good resources for ASD/HFA and sex/intimacy? I've been in a relationship for almost a decade now and I'm suddenly getting anxiety in the bedroom and it's really having a negative impact on our relationship.
 
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JonnyDBrit

JonnyDBrit

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,113
Does anyone have any good resources for ASD/HFA and sex/intimacy? I've been in a relationship for almost a decade now and I'm suddenly getting anxiety in the bedroom and it's really having a negative impact on our relationship.
I tend to default to the National Autistic Society for stuff like this, and while that does run the risk of not properly checking their material, it's consistent enough that I generally trust them unless noted:
https://www.autism.org.uk/about/family-life/partners.aspx

Skimming through it, much of it is more on the abstract and focuses on getting into relationships, so if others here can chime in, whether with their own resources or anecdotal experiences - I certainly have nothing to provide there - that'd be appreciated
 

Ac30

Member
Oct 30, 2017
11,770
London
I tend to default to the National Autistic Society for stuff like this, and while that does run the risk of not properly checking their material, it's consistent enough that I generally trust them unless noted:
https://www.autism.org.uk/about/family-life/partners.aspx

Skimming through it, much of it is more on the abstract and focuses on getting into relationships, so if others here can chime in, whether with their own resources or anecdotal experiences - I certainly have nothing to provide there - that'd be appreciated
Thanks, I’ll give this a look through! Any other tips would be appreciated.
 

CatDoggo

Member
Oct 25, 2017
565
I'm starting to see an odd and rather worrying undercurrent of contrarianism in the autistic community that largely amounts to 'Hey, autism speaks isn't so bad!' They've made efforts to improve and they're just trying to help low functioning autistic kids! Who are we to tell them to stop when we don't know what it's like to be low functioning or have to raise a kid like that?' I even saw a post claiming that to be against them is like being against people who are looking for a cure for cancer. Ugh, why do so many people love to compare being autistic to having cancer, including other autistic people?

It's been cropping up way more lately as April gets closer and more posts about acceptance over awareness pops up. I don't know if this is just a weird backlash that's happening due to the need for some people to be contrarian about everything and they feel the need to do so now that hating Autism Speaks is more mainstream than not nowadays, or perhaps some sort of astroturfing is going on to try and make it seem like they're more accepted by the autistic community. I wouldn't put it past them to pull such a thing. Either way, it's a bit distressing to see it becoming more common to defend them when we know how shitty they are. If they want their image to improve then its up to them to prove it to us, nothing more, nothing less.
 

HamsterDude

Banned
Oct 29, 2017
122
ARGH

Now in an autism Discord they called me an "lolcow" I already told my Psychologist this Monday that I felt bad that someone else online said the other week that I'm a "lolcow" and that everyone sees me as one.

Argh

I don't know if its because of my aspergers syndrome or what argh...

(By the way, I'd like a Discord invite too if there is one.)

Edit:


I'M REALLY SAD!!!!!!

WHYYYY I was working for three days on daily development logs on my Hamster Rivals online game but people kept harassing me every morning afternoon and night and I deleted almost all my social media and now even still people are calling me a lolcow and I'm so sad!!!!

Edit again:

"Today at 12:09 AM
Listen
Use a new account then
Dont use that same Abu bs because its a harassment magnet"

They told me that after asking why I'm called Abu online but I don't want to change my online username, I like being called Abu ;-; I left that server for autistic people that I joined, they keep calling me a lolcow and making fun of me and saying I'm weird... I hate being weird if it means I'm bothering people... Aaah... (Edit: nevermind I joined it again, the moderator told me to leave the group that was harassing me and I thought they meant that server since they keep calling me a lolcow and telling me to give up the Abu name but they told me they didn't mean for me to leave that server and they invited me back and want me to stay but I feel bad that they keep making fun of me there..)
 
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