Well I meant in the type of stories that spawned this trope; female characters are almost devoid of lead status in stories where there's any heroism involved (almost entirely devoid of any anti-hero type characterisations for instance where I'd say this trope is almost most common.)
As it currently stands the rare female lead is generally designed to fit a different archtype and that seems to be the real root of the problem; my point being that for these types of characters a loved one dying is a reasonable plot... so criticising them seems counterproductive to the real issue: we need more stoic / vengeful / heroic / anti-hero women in stories.
Basically there's nothing wrong with Andrea dying as a motivator for Jesse IMO; people's lives being destroyed because of him is sort of the entire point of his story.
This trope doesn't really just exist in edgy-darklord type stories, it occurs pretty often. It's just at it's most gruesome in those kinds of stories, but basically, it isn't very different from "Save the Damsel in distress!" The point is that the fundamental problem that the trope comes from is the idea that women are treated as the emotional vulnerable point of mens lives, but not full characters themselves. They're just tools to help characterize men, which is a dehumanizing way of treating them. That can happen in children stories as much as any dark story.
Which doesn't automatically make it an invalid trope to use, which is what you seem to be arguing against. I never said it was invalid and have been arguing from the start that Andrea could arguably be considered a good instance of fridging.
It's just that humanistic writing will, by it's nature, characterize people in specific ways. The problem with Andrea is that she just wasn't characterized in any particular way. She was just Jesse's next girlfriend. Which is what makes her different from, as we've been talking about, Jane, who had a lot of characterization and agency in the story.
For me, one of the easiest ways to contrast it is how Batman Begins characterized Thomas Wayne in comparison to most other Batman adapations: Thomas taught Bruce morals, he expressed affection for his wife, he was a practicing doctor, he was emotionally aware of his sons fright in the theater, etc. Batman Begins gave us some sense of who Batman's father was as a person. In most other Batman adaptations, we don't have any sense of who Thomas Wayne was besides Bruce's father. In contrast, even the Batman Begin's Martha Wayne lacks characterization, like most other Martha Wayne's to come before or after her (Yes, even Martha "WHY DID YOU SAY THAT NAME" Wayne). All you can say about Martha Wayne is that she's Batman's mom.
The thing that bugs me is that Andrea simply wasn't done justice in terms of characterization like most other characters, but was used as such a crucial emotional point for Jesse. And part of me feels that's realistic: There are people like Andrea out there that really just want to raise their kid and not do anything crazy, despite being in crazinesses proximity. But as a storytelling mechanic, it's hard to argue that it isn't a completely typical example of fridging. And it might be an acceptable example in the context of Breaking Bad itself, since the show does characterize other women and give them agency in different ways. And maybe that makes it alright because, as it's been pointed out, it's main problem is it's prevalence in other media, not BB specifically. But it is a typical example of the exact thing that other, lesser shows do.
I guess it's just hard to reconcile it as something that's broadly known as a sorta bad thing while it remains such an effective emotional gutpunch in the story it's in.
The most I can say is that I just wish Andrea had been able to be more to the audience before she was killed off.
Asides:
* Yeah, I thought about Jane but she's as much agent/antagonist as anything. And when I thought about people who died for plot furtherance in BrBa, I considered Gale and the kid in the desert as well. BrBa is pretty brutal to characters whose actions aren't essential to the plot.
* I listed Bucky because it took him 40 years (from the establishment of his death) to actually come back. So he counted as dead.
Regarding Jane, that's fine, as long as she does have that agency and characterization. That's the important part. Gale, meanwhile, it's wierd to argue if he had agency in the story, but he DEFINITELY had characterization. He's one of the most unique characters in the entirety of either series, being a joyful, happy nerd that made drugs because chemistry is his passion in a way that eclipses even Walt's drive for the science. It's not a perfect fit, because he wasn't the emotional dependent of anyone in the series despite being an emotional person himself, but him being killed is something that fit because Gale wasn't just anyone. He was a very unique, very specific person in the world of BB, and that's enough.
Lastly, the kid...well, we got a tiny bit of characterization: He liked insects, since he boxed up that spider. But at the same time, Kids are the one type of person I would argue can be written as emotional vulnerable points without characterization. I mean, preferably, you wnat them to be characterized, like anyone else. But kids are valued by default to most people just as part of a natural instinct to protect the young. The essential problem with treating characters as emotional plot devices is that it robs them of humanity. Except, kids aren't complete people, so it's okay. Women are though, so it's not.