Bonding (Netflix)
- Thread starter Blue Lou
- Start date
First time I heard of it. I had to look it up and watch the trailer. I'll watch. For now, I have Cobra Kai.
Yeah, I've noticed this too.
https://decider.com/2019/04/26/bonding-netflix-slammed-dominatrix-community/
The first two episodes are alright so far.
I thought the same thing, it was distracting at first.Is that this guy?
Saw it was a netflix show about bondage and figured it got the entire premise completely wrong to the point of being offensive (Atypical, 13 Reasons Why etc.)
Ironically, that news site could have consulted with an actual dominatrix to detail the problems that are causing real life dominatrixes to criticise the show. Otherwise gotta wait until a dominatrix does an article or video essay about how Bonding gets BDSM wrong.
Well we watched it with a friend and yeah, this show is problematic as fuck.
- This show is written, directed, produced, etc, by a MAN who has had a fleeting passing experience in the BDSM/Dominatrix scene
- This show disregards soo much to do with consent with clients, the main character is often forcing the assistant to do things against his will, pushing him into situations without telling him, in the actual BDSM scene this would never be done without any form of consent at all, the ONLY time the show touches on consent is of course when it's directed from Men towards Women (Sexual consent) which then comes across as a complete hypocrite moment since it's the main character who then rants about Consent whilst she is the biggest offender of NOT getting consent in the show
- In the real world, Clients often like to remain discreet, this show portrays those who indulge in BDSM as people who WILL show you up and shout about it at the worst possible times, showing that clients and those who partake in BDSM can not be trusted
- The main character meets potential enquires in her full gear, no actual domme would waste their own personal time doing this as it's considered "giving a free show" to those asking, the fun begins AFTER an agreement is made
- This show completely disregards screening in the industry, the finale is surrounded by this and makes out that all Sex Workers/BDSM workers will drop their own checks and safety if you simply offer them enough money, which is completely laughable
- There's a scene in the show where something happens where the LAW/POLICE would actually be on the side of the main characters, instead this show portrays that the Law/Police merely see them as prostitutes and don't care about helping and would care more about the potential serial killer/rapist instead, for fucking real
- The main character is written in a way that she's constantly an unlikable bitch and that's apparently how all Domme's are, couldn't be further from the damn truth but hey the show has got so much wrong at this point,m who cares
And then there's the stuff OUTSIDE of the show where Netflix/Twitter are happy to promote this show whilst treating actual sex workers and those in the BDSM lifestyle like shit. In a normal circumstance, Twitter will limit and shadowban accounts of Sex Workers and BDSM lifestyle promoters, even IF they tag themselves as 18+, Twitter has been banning accounts of actual Dom's speaking up about this show, meanwhile Twitter is allowing Netflix to promote a PARODY account that's supposed to be the Twitter account of the main character on the show, spouting all sorts of false crap and bad writing that's on the show, and Twitter has been promoting this account. So apparently it's ok to profit from Sex Workers.BDSM Lifetsyle folk when you're parodying them and it's OK to show this content, etc, but ACTUAL Sex Workers are still wrong and get punished on the very same platform. There was a call by other Sex Workers to tag themselves with this account to try and at least promote themselves in this situation "If you want to REALLY know what time with a domme is like...", and Netflix responded by REPORTING these comments, removing them and then Twitter shadowbanning the accounts. Seems fair right?
- This show is written, directed, produced, etc, by a MAN who has had a fleeting passing experience in the BDSM/Dominatrix scene
- This show disregards soo much to do with consent with clients, the main character is often forcing the assistant to do things against his will, pushing him into situations without telling him, in the actual BDSM scene this would never be done without any form of consent at all, the ONLY time the show touches on consent is of course when it's directed from Men towards Women (Sexual consent) which then comes across as a complete hypocrite moment since it's the main character who then rants about Consent whilst she is the biggest offender of NOT getting consent in the show
- In the real world, Clients often like to remain discreet, this show portrays those who indulge in BDSM as people who WILL show you up and shout about it at the worst possible times, showing that clients and those who partake in BDSM can not be trusted
- The main character meets potential enquires in her full gear, no actual domme would waste their own personal time doing this as it's considered "giving a free show" to those asking, the fun begins AFTER an agreement is made
- This show completely disregards screening in the industry, the finale is surrounded by this and makes out that all Sex Workers/BDSM workers will drop their own checks and safety if you simply offer them enough money, which is completely laughable
- There's a scene in the show where something happens where the LAW/POLICE would actually be on the side of the main characters, instead this show portrays that the Law/Police merely see them as prostitutes and don't care about helping and would care more about the potential serial killer/rapist instead, for fucking real
- The main character is written in a way that she's constantly an unlikable bitch and that's apparently how all Domme's are, couldn't be further from the damn truth but hey the show has got so much wrong at this point,m who cares
And then there's the stuff OUTSIDE of the show where Netflix/Twitter are happy to promote this show whilst treating actual sex workers and those in the BDSM lifestyle like shit. In a normal circumstance, Twitter will limit and shadowban accounts of Sex Workers and BDSM lifestyle promoters, even IF they tag themselves as 18+, Twitter has been banning accounts of actual Dom's speaking up about this show, meanwhile Twitter is allowing Netflix to promote a PARODY account that's supposed to be the Twitter account of the main character on the show, spouting all sorts of false crap and bad writing that's on the show, and Twitter has been promoting this account. So apparently it's ok to profit from Sex Workers.BDSM Lifetsyle folk when you're parodying them and it's OK to show this content, etc, but ACTUAL Sex Workers are still wrong and get punished on the very same platform. There was a call by other Sex Workers to tag themselves with this account to try and at least promote themselves in this situation "If you want to REALLY know what time with a domme is like...", and Netflix responded by REPORTING these comments, removing them and then Twitter shadowbanning the accounts. Seems fair right?
Think the worst part for me was when they reveal her backstory and it is the same stupid shit that tends to be labeled on all sex workers, because apparently according to most media out there featuring BDSM and sex work, you can't be into it, without there being some kind of trauma in your past.
Brilliant post and nailed all my thoughts
Also as Michael points out, sick to death of the BDSM / trauma assumption
You know what would be a shocking show? Showing consenting adults (including sex workers) engaging in BDSM as it's practiced widely in reality
I just finished the last episode and it was cute and everything but theres really not a lot here. If they're trying to hook an audience they could be doing a much better job of it and if it got canceled I wouldn't think twice about it. The same could be said for their other show "Special". It starts out with a lot of promise but then doesn't go anywhere with it.
