Do you feel shame about your interests?

[Deleted member 21339]

Why am I ashamed of the things I'm interested in? I'll give you an example. The other day I felt the urge to want to play some old PS3 games, so I got a couple out of the closet and spent an hour or two replaying the game, but in the back of my mind the whole time I couldn't shake the feeling that I am a total loser for sitting in my house and playing a video game. I guess my age has a bit to do with it. I mean, I am 38 now and I'm single and have virtually no romantic life to speak of at the moment, but it's also not like all I do is sit home and play video games all the time either. I work a full time job, have a close circle of friends and try to do things when I can. This Saturday I'm going to a concert and tailgating beforehand, just as an example. Is it wrong to enjoy a hobby like that for a few hours once in a while? The thing is, i ALWAYS feel this way too. Just the other day I told this girl at work who I'm pretty good friends with that I saw the movie Shazam by myself. And she said why the hell would you go see that, you are a grown ass man? I told her well I wanted to see it. Is that wrong?

Am I an eternal man-child? I mean, I am have had long term romantic relationships before and have been on dates, I've just hit a dry spell and I felt like I needed some time to be alone and be comfortable being alone. I'm responsible in so called adult areas of life. I have been employed consistently for the last 12 years. My credit score is really high. My bills are paid. My car is fully paid off. I have a decent amount of savings. I do a good job at work. I have my own place... I'm not living in my parents basement playing video games all day, yet I do still feel very much like a kid at times. I don't know

 

[Chivalry]

No. Life is too short to give a shit. "Those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind " - Dr. Seuss

 

[Ragnite]

Hell no, life is too short to care about what people think about what you enjoy.

 

[Deleted member 10629]

No. I like what I like and I'm not hurting anybody.

 

[Bane]

Not even a little. And fuck that lady for judging someone for seeing a damn movie. You do you homie, you're not hurting anyone.

 

[jml]

I used to be really self-conscious about this thing but I don't care anymore. If someone's going to shun me just because I like an "uncool" type of music or a certain TV show then I don't really care what that person thinks.

Life's short, do whatever you like to do.

 

[Silly Buck]

Yes it's wrong. What "should" you be interested in? Make the choice to do things you enjoy and be there fully to enjoy them.

Those that tell you otherwise are just placing themselves in your spot and they don't have the same interests.

 

[Ryan.]

No, but it also helps I have family and friend circles who either don't care or share the same interests as I do on top of still doing stuff like go out to bars, the movies, eat, or whatever.

 

[16bits]

I enjoy the things i enjoy.

Who cares what other people think, especially those as judgemental as your "pretty good friend".

 

[Inkvoterad]

I do feel some about my catgirl anime earlicking ASMR

but otherwise meh not really

 

[CrazyAndy]

No. You shouldn't feel ashamed of your hobbies. Do whatever you want to do in your spare time. If you want to relax after a day of work by playing games or going to the theater then you do exactly that.

 

[nsilvias]

sometimes i feel ashamed for not enjoying any of my cultures arts. its like im american but i still feel bad for not liking something i didnt grow up around. kinda makes me feel like i dont deserve to be part of my culture.

 

[entremet]

Nope.

Your coworker sounds like an asshat lol.

 

[Ebullientprism]

Nope.

I do feel shame about the people I share my hobby with though. So I try not to tell anyone that I like video games.

 

[shaneo632]

Not at all. This perception that you're a man-baby for watching Pixar movies or playing Splatoon as an adult is just absurd. Life's tough enough as it is, why enforce some pointless perception that Adults Must Do "Adult" Things and be all serious and uptight? Fuck that fam, I ain't about that life.

 

[Like the hat?]

I stopped caring about being "cool" in my early 20s (35 now). Just do what makes you happy.

 

[Blue Sky Noise]

What are 'grown-up' hobbies? Golfing? lol

 

[AxeVince]

I feel more ashamed of my coping mechanism that I fall into due to stress than my hobbies.
Why would I feel ashamed about anything ? If it makes me happy and does not break a law ? Fuck people who tell me I should not do it.

You're saying it yourself: you have your life in check and are responsible, take care of yourself and if it means having fun at a superhero movie or playing games ? Do it. Also, maybe change those friends who shame you for doing what makes you feel good.

 

[Deleted member 8741]

No, but I also feel things that things I enjoy like video games or other nerdy things are central to who I am. IMO it's about balance and confidence.

 

[Deleted member 36708]

Gaming and my family is about it so no not ashamed.

 

[Tezz]

Yeah.

 

[Deleted member 41178]

I thought this was going to be about escorts again, at the end of the day as long as you're not hurting anyone do what makes you happy.

 

[Kurita]

I stopped caring about this when I turned 20.

 

[AegonSnake]

Why am I ashamed of the things I'm interested in? I'll give you an example. The other day I felt the urge to want to play some old PS3 games, so I got a couple out of the closet and spent an hour or two replaying the game, but in the back of my mind the whole time I couldn't shake the feeling that I am a total loser for sitting in my house and playing a video game. I guess my age has a bit to do with it. I mean, I am 38 now and I'm single and have virtually no romantic life to speak of at the moment, but it's also not like all I do is sit home and play video games all the time either. I work a full time job, have a close circle of friends and try to do things when I can. This Saturday I'm going to a concert and tailgating beforehand, just as an example. Is it wrong to enjoy a hobby like that for a few hours once in a while? The thing is, i ALWAYS feel this way too. Just the other day I told this girl at work who I'm pretty good friends with that I saw the movie Shazam by myself. And she said why the hell would you go see that, you are a grown ass man? I told her well I wanted to see it. Is that wrong?

Am I an eternal man-child? I mean, I am have had long term romantic relationships before and have been on dates, I've just hit a dry spell and I felt like I needed some time to be alone and be comfortable being alone. I'm responsible in so called adult areas of life. I have been employed consistently for the last 12 years. My credit score is really high. My bills are paid. My car is fully paid off. I have a decent amount of savings. I do a good job at work. I have my own place... I'm not living in my parents basement playing video games all day, yet I do still feel very much like a kid at times. I don't know

Click to shrink...

i am married with kids and still play games everyday. dont let anyone tell you that being married or having a girlfriend or having kids will bring you happiness. its clearly not true. if anything it will bring misery and stress. lol.

you seem to have your finances in order, you are already successful in life. do what you gotta do when you come home after a long day of work. enjoy your games or movies or action figures. you have earned it.

i know women, grown women, who still read shit like twilight. to me thats more juvenile than playing a video game or watching shazaam. they know that too. everyone is a kid at heart.

 

[Tokyo_Funk]

When I was young I was labelled as the "Nerd" and the "Computer geek" and I had to hide it as best as possible because I was beaten up and threatened for being into technology/gaming. The irony being the people who used to abuse me are subbed to game pages on FaceBook. Serious fucking hypocrites.

 

[Zhukov]

Hell no!

I am immensely proud of my carefully curated collection of human fingernails and enthusiastically show it off to anyone who visits.

 

[Baccus]

Only videogames

I'm getting better at hiding them tho

 

[meowdi gras]

Not in the least.

 

[Doober]

I'm a miniature painter, and when I was married I didn't give a shit. Now that I'm single though, uh... :-/

 

[WascallyWabbit]

Nah, I mean the only interests you should be ashamed of if they are hurting someone else
That said, I know it's hard to shake that feeling. My main thing is I feel like I need to be productive before I sit down and relax with a video game or something like that. If I don't I feel shame that there's chores that need doing

 

[Deleted member 21339]

Nope.

Your coworker sounds like an asshat lol.

Click to shrink...

She's not actually. I really like her and I called her out on what she said. She tends to have some toxic views of masculinity and I told her that when she reacted that way. We didn't argue about it and she seem to genuinely consider what I said and took it to heart

 

[Thurston Last]

I am not ashamed of my interestes, but I might downplay how "in" to something I am when first meeting people. You don't want to be "that guy" that spends the next 20 minutes bragging about their overclocking setup when they hear you are into PCs or goes on about all the rare cards and decks they have if you mentioned you have played MTG or something.

 

[Euphoria]

I'm 35 and collect horror memorabilia, play mobile games and sometimes even might watch an anime or two.

Most people know this because I don't hide. No reason to.

 

[pokeystaples]

Not at all. I stopped caring what other people thought a long time ago. I'm 36 years old. That's a long time to feel shame about a hobby. My friends game, my family games, my coworkers play games so or have family members who play games. Gaming is now a pretty mainstream hobby. I'm sorry you feel shame about this thing you enjoy.

 

[OrangeNova]

None. I'm not worried about what others think of me.

Hell, use it to your advantage, people love seeing when people genuinely like something, but you have to know how to present it.

 

[Deleted member 21339]

None. I'm not worried about what others think of me.

Hell, use it to your advantage, people love seeing when people genuinely like something, but you have to know how to present it.

Click to shrink...

You really, genuinely don't care what others think of you? I have to imagine most people do to some extent.

 

[パンダさん]

Nope, not anymore. I had this up until my late teens, but I've learned to don't give a damn anymore.

 

[King Alamat]

I feel embarrassed about owning a wallet with a Tri-Force on it because it invites a bunch of goony fucks to talk to me when I'm just trying to leave the damn store.

 

[acheron_xl]

Depends on the interest.

 

[Euphoria]

I have a friend at work who openly talks about he and a group of his friends who try to meet up every other Sunday because they have a D&D campaign that's been ongoing for 3 years.

You're worried about people thinking you watched Shazam?

 

[Deleted member 1086]

no, why would I? I like what I like, I'm not here to please other people.

 

[Coyote Starrk]

I do about some of my music preferences. I am a sucker for some cheesy and outdated music. Especially Disco and 80's pop music.

 

[Deleted member 47843]

No. I've never cared much what others think and have a career (professor) where I don't have to worry about impressing others beyond being productive and being a nice colleague. I couldn't do a corporate career where you have to fit in with the execs, woo clients etc.

 

[NameUser]

K-pop, kinda. I don't talk about it with anyone IRL. Because I fear that they'll think I'm some creepy dude with an Asian fetish (I'm mostly listen to girl groups but it's not exclusive to k-pop, I also prefer female western pop singers over male ones).

Gaming is so pedestrian now though. No one should be ashamed of that. Same with anime. A lot of that has become so mainstream and no one judges you as long as you aren't obsessed with it (and go around acting like a total dweeb).

But I feel like it's different with something like k-pop. Most people don't understand why someone should listen to something they can't understand lol, and the whole industry is pretty weird when viewed from a western perspective.

 

[Tbm24]

No, I was content as fuck last night watching Anime with my daughter running around the the OP song.

 

[Deleted member 3038]

catgirl anime earlicking ASMR

Click to shrink...

We just gonna cruise by this one?

OT: I could give 2 shits what other people think about my interests. It's my interest for a reason.

 

[Deleted member 3465]

Nope and nobody shouldn't! People will find a way to make you feel bad about your interests either way! Especially if it doesn't conform to what they feel the norm is. It's super insecure for someone to treat you as less because you feel differently about a form of entertainment or hobby.

This is assuming you're not douchey about your tastes or you're not co-signing something that is actively hurting other people. Those are entirely different stories.

 

[Menelaus]

I'm a miniature painter, and when I was married I didn't give a shit. Now that I'm single though, uh... :-/

Click to shrink...

How do you hold the brush though? Isn't it too heavy?

 

[Fulminator]

nope i don't care

 

[CoolOff]

A bit in the sense that I can acknowledge that some interests are unhealthy, especially in time consumption. I would never admit to anyone how much damn idle time I've spent watching Twitch for example.