Does anyone else not want kids?

Terminus

Member
Oct 30, 2017
1,538
So saying that people shouldn’t have kids anymore isn’t talking about that? Wow. Great logic there, my friend.
Do you actually not understand the difference between wrapping your tool and literal murder, or is this just a bit to avoid seriously engaging with the painful ethical dilemma of creating life in a doomed and dying world?
 

Subpar Scrub

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,371
Do you actually not understand the difference between wrapping your tool and literal murder, or is this just a bit to avoid seriously engaging with the painful ethical dilemma of creating life in a doomed and dying world?
I just think giving up is a pathetic path to take. I believe that humans will manage to survive through climate change. Don’t take away the fighting chance of the next generation of the species because “they’ll never make it”, that’s terrible.
 

DeusOcha

Member
Oct 25, 2017
716
SoCal, US
Mid-twenties, I don't want kids. Yadda yadda I'm too young whatever. I can barely take care of myself, why would I've incentive to manage another bratty version of me?
 
Nov 9, 2017
1,446
Do you actually not understand the difference between wrapping your tool and literal murder, or is this just a bit to avoid seriously engaging with the painful ethical dilemma of creating life in a doomed and dying world?
Eh, the world has been doomed and dying since the early 1900's, according to some. Kind of glad my parents decided it was ok to have me anyway.
 

Terminus

Member
Oct 30, 2017
1,538
I just think giving up is a pathetic path to take. I believe that humans will manage to survive through climate change. Don’t take away the fighting chance of the next generation of the species because “they’ll never make it”, that’s terrible.
I truly don’t mean this to be condescending, but I do not know of a single person who is up to date on climate science who believes we will actually pull through it without resorting to magical CCS technology that may never exist. Instead they talk about mitigation, preserving as much of the quality of life to which we are accustomed for as long as we can. Environmental hospice. I mean just last month we learned that stratocumulus clouds will vanish entirely by 2100 and tack another 8 degrees of warming on top of the 4 caused by direct heating alone prior to that event. That does not even account for about a dozen other feedback loops that we know about, to say nothing of the ones we don’t. By the end of the normal lifespan of a child born today, we are on track for a world fundamentally incompatible with human life, full stop.
 
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Alastor3

Member
Oct 28, 2017
3,867
That's why I want to adopt a kid but older (teen) so i don't have to deal with kids but still provide a home and family for someone in need.
 

Relix

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,092
Hell naw. Me and my fisncee are DINKs and we love everything about it. We also loathe kids, can’t see a fun thing about them. Sadly as we grow older more and more are having kids so our core group of friends is getting thin. It’s not that we don’t hang out with those with kids but not we much. We don’t want to use up the little time they have for one and second we can’t stand kids.

So, we’ll enjoy traveling around and doing fun things while they take their kids to a baseball game or do homework with them.
 

Deleted member 47843

User Requested Account Closure
Banned
Sep 16, 2018
2,501
Hell naw. Me and my fisncee are DINKs and we love everything about it. We also loathe kids, can’t see a fun thing about them. Sadly as we grow older more and more are having kids so our core group of friends is getting thin. It’s not that we don’t hang out with those with kids but not we much. We don’t want to use up the little time they have for one and second we can’t stand kids.

So, we’ll enjoy traveling around and doing fun things while they take their kids to a baseball game or do homework with them.
Same. Thankfully the wife and I both have Ph Ds and most of our friends are friends from grad school or current/former colleagues and there area lot of fellow DINKs in those populations. We have some friends with kids, but like you said, we see them less often as 1) we don't want to go to kid-friendly places/events very often as we hate being around kids and 2) it's harder to get friends with kids to go out late into the night (concerts, drinking etc.) very often and that's most of our social outings as we work a lot are aren't doing a lot of leisure stuff during the daytime/early evening.
 

beclause

Member
Oct 28, 2017
71
Had a happy childhood. Love my parents. Love my brother's kids. Same goes for my wife. Of course we want to have kids.

If you say it's selfish to want to have kids, you're right. But if you presume, you're selfless for not wanting kids because of the environment or you hate kids or any other reason, you're just not self-aware.

Everyone's selfish. You do what makes you happy. Just be sure, you know yourself well enough to know what will make you happy
now, tomorrow and years from now
 

TheWraith

Member
Oct 28, 2017
292
I don’t even get what you guys are trying to say tbh. We’ll need humans to get through any climate crisis. I’m going to have to endure it and pre-emptively stating that you don’t want your child to exist due to potential hardship is honestly just a pathetic view to have imo. If it’s a question of population, idk how replacing two lives with one is selfish but you do you.
Because even if you would stop producing children, there are still too many kids being born around the world? It's not because you recycle your own trash that the rest of the world is suddenly also environment conscious.
 

Radec

Member
Oct 26, 2017
1,088
Personally I'm conflicted.

I hate kids when they're being shit and crying. But kinda want to know the feeling of having one myself. I'd like to see my parents held their own grandkid.

My ex had a kid, she calls ne daddy and shows some kind of love. But i couldn't feel anything. Not the reason we separated though.

Maybe I'm selfish, but I can't help wondering how it is to have your own kid and watch them grow up.

I'm not closing any doors yet, I hope life surprises me.
 

Nora

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,511
I would literally rather die than produce a biological heir on this doomed hell world. I'm 31 and I've thought about this a lot and it really pisses me off when people with kids tell me "oh just you wait" or some variation of that.
 

Typhon

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,961
I would literally rather die than produce a biological heir on this doomed hell world. I'm 31 and I've thought about this a lot and it really pisses me off when people with kids tell me "oh just you wait" or some variation of that.
If you don't want kids that's fine, neither do I. But just say it's because you don't want them, you don't have to give an excuse. I sincerely doubt that if we solved climate change tomorrow you would immedietly change your mind.
 

Nora

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,511
If you don't want kids that's fine, neither do I. But just say it's because you don't want them, you don't have to give an excuse. I sincerely doubt that if we solved climate change tomorrow you would immedietly change your mind.
don't make assumptions about me, thanks. You don't know me, I don't know you, and it's rude.
 

earthxsucks

Member
Oct 27, 2017
435
au
i'm almost 32 and don't want them. my partner of 4 years and come to the realisation that she does; therefore i don't think our future is very bright...:(
 

Raster

Member
Feb 28, 2018
1,813
I definitely do want kids, but I can understand people who don't.

It is very irritating when some people say you need to have kids or your life would be pointless or whatever.
 

Gypsie

Member
Oct 29, 2017
570
I'm 35 with same partner for 12 years and neither of us wants kids. We would adopt I think if she ever gets the desire but I have a feeling she won't! I'm personally not bothered if I have them. I have 10 niece's and nephews so can always babysit if I like (I don't....)

We redirect any small amount of maternal instinct we have to our spoiled dogs of course
 

mordecaii83

Avenger
Oct 28, 2017
965
I feel sad for your reason for not wanting kids, life doesn't have to be futile and I hope you can enjoy it one day.

As far as having kids, I'm 35 and married. I have not wanted kids at any point in my life, and thankfully my wife is fine with not having kids as well. This is just another thing society pushes for because it's "normal" and not being normal is frowned upon. But I look around and see people who treat their kids like shit, are clearly unhappy they have them, and I think to myself that I wish more people would have made the choice not to have them.

Don't let anyone else influence that kind of decision for you, having kids should be something you're sure of because once you have them you can't change your mind.
 

fireflame

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,118
I don't want kids because I don't feel able to raise them, mental illness is taking a huge toll on me. I also feel pessimistic about the world we live in, and I fear illnesses and accidents too much. I also believe that I might be cursed, and do not want to pass the curse(yes I know this is not rational).I have also almost given up on finding love. I have also huge hate against pain, fate, and things like these.I hope that people of families who died will forgive me for being so pessimistic, I believe if they can see me thet can _understand how I feel. I recorded yesterday a confession to tell this to them them
 

CrankyJay

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,463
I love my kids but I feel immense guilt and a sense of constant dread as to the stuff they have to face when they’re older.

I don’t blame anyone who doesn’t want to have kids.
 

Tokyo_Funk

Member
Dec 10, 2018
1,699
I don't want kids. My Dad is disappointed, but I just don't like kids. I don't know what it is. I am a generally happy person, but I just don't like being around kids. People shove them in my face like they're trophies or something, or say stuff like "Look my child did (insert thing here)" and I'm like "Yeah, kids do kid things, shocking". I would not make a very good father either, so knowing this I just can't bring myself to following it up.
 

Kain-Nosgoth

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,639
Switzerland
never wanted kids, i'm all for people still making them though, it's not as bad as people say, there's plenty of good left in this world and things can be fixed
 
Nov 10, 2017
99
I’ve noticed a pattern with my friends and family

Happy family life growing up? Want kids

Unhappy family life? Don’t want kids or are on the fence
 

dirtyjane

Member
Oct 27, 2017
290
It's hard to say yes to kids if your family, friends, scientists, forum members, people on the street (basically 90% of the population) all moan about how our Earth is doomed in the next 10-100 years.
 

Tedmilk

Avenger
Nov 13, 2017
668
Yeah some people just feel forced by religion/family or even normal persuasion because it's normal.
I will say that I do get some pressure from my mum to have kids, but in my view that is a pretty selfish way to behave towards your own children. I feel well within my rights to shut her down whenever it comes up, but also happy to have a conversation with her about it so she can understand my reasons.

She doesn't seem to care about my reasons though...
 
Nov 10, 2017
99
It's hard to say yes to kids if your family, friends, scientists, forum members, people on the street (basically 90% of the population) all moan about how our Earth is doomed in the next 10-100 years.
I get it. I have a friend who feels this way. But I think smart people having children and raising them to be smart will be a huge benefit to future generations and the environment. If only people who don’t care have kids and teach them their beliefs than the world will be worse off, not better, because people who care decided against children.

If you don’t want kids for personal reasons I totally get it. But I don’t buy the idea that environmentaly conscious people deciding against children will help the planet. In fact I suspect the opposite.
 

Animismus

Member
Oct 27, 2017
42
I didn't want kids. My wife wants kids. We have a small baby now and I am very happy but could not see myself having a child with any other person. People do change, not much most of the time, but enough!
 

offshore

Member
Oct 27, 2017
285
UK
If someone could guarantee to me that any kids I had would be outgoing and willing to try new activities, then I would love to have kids...

...but I just know that in that split second, when you first say to your growing kids "hey, you should join this club or that club", that I'd just get a sulky "pffft NO! I'm not doing that"... and then it'd just be like... oh god. lol. When I think back to all the clubs I could have joined or all the extra activities I could have done in my youth, it would kill me to see a kid of mine make exactly the same mistake.
 

Phil32

Member
Oct 28, 2017
2,824
I can't even take care of myself, so having a child would be very irresponsible of me. I wouldn't want my bad genes passed down to them, and I wouldn't want them to have a disappointment for a father.
 

Makoto Yuki

Member
Oct 25, 2017
569
If by kids you mean a zoo of dogs, cats, and other animals such as dragons, then yes I want kids.

Actual human children, debatable. Maybe I'll adopt. Or get a surrogate.
 

Nars99

Member
Nov 1, 2017
53
My toddler nieces can at times be annoying, but they were often a joy to be around, too.
Looking around, at my self and my friends, I can see how hard it is for our parents to deal with us, it is unpredictable how your kid will turn out to be and may never connect with. However, I can see that the relationship with family can be very special too and I do not want to miss on that experience.
 

TheRaidenPT

Member
Jun 11, 2018
3,259
Lisbon, Portugal
I will say that I do get some pressure from my mum to have kids, but in my view that is a pretty selfish way to behave towards your own children. I feel well within my rights to shut her down whenever it comes up, but also happy to have a conversation with her about it so she can understand my reasons.

She doesn't seem to care about my reasons though...
My girlfriend's parents are always pressuring us.. my family doesn't care at all and my dad says I shouldn't have kids
 

Woffls

Member
Nov 25, 2017
460
London
Definitely not, and less so now than ever at the age of 31 (fml), but I am aware that someone might turn up and change my mind. Perpetually single so whatever.