I'm going to try to communicate this as respectful as possible.
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10156122868542922&id=86973707921&
I am a trans woman.
Imagine. When you first come to the community one of the biggest things most girls transitioning wanted to avoid was being seen as a man in a dress. This seven years ago. Not only did women want to avoid it because that is how the media and larger society saw us as, but there was also the fact that the mere thought of looking like a man in a dress was enough to cause many girls fall into a panic attack. Suffice to say, it was to be avoided. It wasn't cute.
Instead, you put maximum effort into being representing yourself and the community in the best manner possible because you wanted to look your best. You didn't want to get clocked, because getting clocked meant bad news.
Shows like Family Guy and South Park would air episodes distilling trans women to either performative antics of feminity or really just men with mutilated body parts. It was humiliating seeing your community dehumanized on television like this.
But you said your piece online and shut up and then watched a new makeup tutorial on YouTube or did a voice lesson. You did anything to put hard work into your presentation.
Fast forward to now.
Suddenly there's people who are completely different from your ethos sharing your label as trans.
These people are fine being masculine while expressing feminity.
They are fine being seen as "men in dresses."
They are fine not even shaving or waxing their arms while demanding that society deem them to be women.
Suddenly you have people who think these things are completely fine while taking a label of "trans", something people fought long and hard to avoid being seen as this.
Where they equate "womanhood" as nothing more than performative acts like putting on a cheap dress from a thrift store.
These people now represent you in the media. You do NOT agree with them about ANYTHING but still they share the label as trans.
When you plead that having masculine presentation while wearing and behaving that like that is potentially harmful to transsexual women and how we are seen, we are accused of being transphobic. You just have to shut the fuck up and accept it.
The video I linked above disgusts me. Words cannot describe my daily loathing of the non-binaries in the video I linked. I find it offensive, a caricature of woman-hood. Drag is at least artistic and with a set goal in mind, but I'm not seeing it here. Yet drag is often called awful and exploitive by this group regularly.
I'm trying to understand but I cannot get past the fact that these people think we share even the slightest cause. The trans women I know would kill ourselves before we ever looked like that while claiming to be trans. We suffer daily because we see the slightest hair on our face or body. Body hair at all is enough to make me want to claw my skin till it bleeds and fall into a puddle of dysphoric agony. Then these people, who just don't give a shit, claim to be EXACTLY LIKE US, that we share the same problems, or even situation.
It is beyond infuriating and I'm trying to be open, but every non-binary I see just feels like a slap to the face. I'm really trying and failing.
Please help me with this. I feel like as a trans woman my perspective no longer matters, and now we have to kowtow to what are seemingly men in dresses.
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10156122868542922&id=86973707921&
I am a trans woman.
Imagine. When you first come to the community one of the biggest things most girls transitioning wanted to avoid was being seen as a man in a dress. This seven years ago. Not only did women want to avoid it because that is how the media and larger society saw us as, but there was also the fact that the mere thought of looking like a man in a dress was enough to cause many girls fall into a panic attack. Suffice to say, it was to be avoided. It wasn't cute.
Instead, you put maximum effort into being representing yourself and the community in the best manner possible because you wanted to look your best. You didn't want to get clocked, because getting clocked meant bad news.
Shows like Family Guy and South Park would air episodes distilling trans women to either performative antics of feminity or really just men with mutilated body parts. It was humiliating seeing your community dehumanized on television like this.
But you said your piece online and shut up and then watched a new makeup tutorial on YouTube or did a voice lesson. You did anything to put hard work into your presentation.
Fast forward to now.
Suddenly there's people who are completely different from your ethos sharing your label as trans.
These people are fine being masculine while expressing feminity.
They are fine being seen as "men in dresses."
They are fine not even shaving or waxing their arms while demanding that society deem them to be women.
Suddenly you have people who think these things are completely fine while taking a label of "trans", something people fought long and hard to avoid being seen as this.
Where they equate "womanhood" as nothing more than performative acts like putting on a cheap dress from a thrift store.
These people now represent you in the media. You do NOT agree with them about ANYTHING but still they share the label as trans.
When you plead that having masculine presentation while wearing and behaving that like that is potentially harmful to transsexual women and how we are seen, we are accused of being transphobic. You just have to shut the fuck up and accept it.
The video I linked above disgusts me. Words cannot describe my daily loathing of the non-binaries in the video I linked. I find it offensive, a caricature of woman-hood. Drag is at least artistic and with a set goal in mind, but I'm not seeing it here. Yet drag is often called awful and exploitive by this group regularly.
I'm trying to understand but I cannot get past the fact that these people think we share even the slightest cause. The trans women I know would kill ourselves before we ever looked like that while claiming to be trans. We suffer daily because we see the slightest hair on our face or body. Body hair at all is enough to make me want to claw my skin till it bleeds and fall into a puddle of dysphoric agony. Then these people, who just don't give a shit, claim to be EXACTLY LIKE US, that we share the same problems, or even situation.
It is beyond infuriating and I'm trying to be open, but every non-binary I see just feels like a slap to the face. I'm really trying and failing.
Please help me with this. I feel like as a trans woman my perspective no longer matters, and now we have to kowtow to what are seemingly men in dresses.
