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For ‘Gamer Girls’ paid to play ‘Fortnite,’ therapy skills are almost required

Flousn

Member
Jan 16, 2018
1,113
And for most guys they get the mindset the only way to have a girl talk or play video games with me is to pay for it. That doesn't exactly sound healthly...but who knows.
Yeah I know, I'm not saying it's a perfect situation. But it's still better than not having someone to talk to at all. But "healthy".... Yeah...probably not in the long term
 
Oct 29, 2017
1,981
One the one hand, it's kinda weird, sad and the jokes write themselves but....
If these girls actually use fortnite of all things to get some guys to talk about their feelings and open up to a girl, I think it's a good cause.
I somehow doubt that they're getting meaningful help from this. They're paying these girls to flatter them and pretend to be their girlfriend, not to challenge them to improve themselves like a therapist might.
 

Hexa

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,009
It's like being a virtual hostess. Seems interesting and I don't see anything wrong with it. They should charge more though.
 
Oct 25, 2017
1,814
I mean, good for these women to make money on the side doing something they'd prob enjoy anyways
Some of the stuff is kind of sad that they have to be the ones who deal with that, hopefully they protect their identities enough so it doesn't get super creepy
 

Tigress

Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,414
Washington
It's not a full time job, but it's $20 an hour to play video games and chat with someone. An extra $6000 a year doing that doesn't sound like the most awful thing in the world.
If I were any good at video games I'd consider it honestly (I work retail and don't get paid enough and I'd actually enjoy something like that.. I'd have the same rules as her though). But I doubt anyone is going to pay to play with some one who kinda sucks at games, heh.
 

TaleSpun

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,130
I figure a lot of the responses in this thread will be jokes about paying for girls to play video games with you, but it sounds like these guys are looking for an outlet to express their personal feelings and chatting with someone over Fortnite is a safe space for them to do it. Maybe this is something professional therapists could explore further.
You can bet the majority of the joke comments are also coming from people that don’t realize how expensive therapy can be despite how crucial it can be to someone’s mental well-being.

She’s taking precautions to protect herself, she’s helping people that probably need it; More power to her and the dudes she’s talking to for doing this and not finding refuge in some bottom feeder’s subreddit.
 

Lord of Ostia

Member
Oct 27, 2017
15,771
I feel bad for both these women and the men that are paying for their services. The women are basically acting as therapists with none of the training, education, or support allows therapists to do what they do, putting them into uncomfortable situations they are unprepared for. Many of the men clearly need professional therapy, but either don't have access to it or social stigma has made that seem unacceptable to them. This is just really sad all around.
 

Aal-Vee

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,207
Canada
Sounds like a lot of men resort to this come from all walks of life and situations. Unfortunately, some of them seem to be committing emotional infidelity using her as an outlet. Men not being able to seek emotional support from other people(not just other men) seems to be a recurring issue/theme. In my personal life I am starting to notice it more and more and it's honestly really sad. Some of these guys fear expressing themselves in fear of judgement and from looking unstable and weak and have to resort to paying someone when in real life daily interactions with people SHOULD be able to fulfill this sort of thing for free.
 

Lord of Ostia

Member
Oct 27, 2017
15,771
You can bet the majority of the joke comments are also coming from people that don’t realize how expensive therapy can be despite how crucial it can be to someone’s mental well-being.

She’s taking precautions to protect herself, she’s helping people that probably need it; More power to her and the dudes she’s talking to for doing this and not finding refuge in some bottom feeder’s subreddit.
Absolutely, people have no idea how much therapy costs. Once a week, one hour sessions for me are $200 a month, and that's with insurance covering half of the cost.
 

cyrribrae

Member
Jan 21, 2019
920
I figure a lot of the responses in this thread will be jokes about paying for girls to play video games with you, but it sounds like these guys are looking for an outlet to express their personal feelings and chatting with someone over Fortnite is a safe space for them to do it. Maybe this is something professional therapists could explore further.
It's not really conducive to therapy. Gaming can be made part of therapy, perhaps, but part of the reason this works is that it feels organic (yes, even though money is exchanging hands - but heck, same with therapy). Companionship is weird for many, sure, but it's not necessarily something that I have a problem with per se. What I do have a problem with is these girls having to put themselves in a position where they are taking on other people's shit without the resources, training, and pay that usually requires.

Still, that's probably why the successful ones are successful, right? So much of therapy comes down to empathy and the ability to connect with someone quickly and genuinely (yes, the psychological theories and techniques are very important too. As are the distancing and managing skills for doing it professionally). I don't see this as a "at least she's getting paid" as much as "awesome that she's getting paid for using her skills and experience, I hope she's getting the support she needs so this doesn't hurt her in the long term." Same goes for an entire class of cam girls, who are actually performing a very similar service (with very different set dressing and generally more money).
 

kyorii

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,194
Remnant
This is pretty much along the lines of escorting l/companionship/camgirl even. Not a bad thing really. Good thing they're getting paid for their emotional labor.
 

Chromie

Member
Dec 4, 2017
1,222
I figure a lot of the responses in this thread will be jokes about paying for girls to play video games with you, but it sounds like these guys are looking for an outlet to express their personal feelings and chatting with someone over Fortnite is a safe space for them to do it. Maybe this is something professional therapists could explore further.
Yeah I know, I'm not saying it's a perfect situation. But it's still better than not having someone to talk to at all. But "healthy".... Yeah...probably not in the long term

I think someone who isn’t a professional trying to emulate “therapy skills” is a bad idea.

A real professional that can help is a great thing. A good therapist doesn't always make you feel better when you're there; often the goal is to challenge you, make you answer questions you've been avoiding because it's easier to pretend the problem isn't there, force a third-party perspective into your own insecurities, and maybe find progress that will improve your day-to-day functioning.

I’m sure in this situation someone would just want some validation and to be listened to, which isn’t bad but I think sends the wrong message.
 

Chopchop

Member
Oct 25, 2017
6,432
It sounds like a side gig, but yeah... Definitely not charging enough for that. Even is most of the guys are okay, running into the occasional creeper regularly will wear on you real fast.

Outside of the creepers, a lot of the normal guys simply sound lonely. It's similar to those hire-a-friend/girlfriend type things.
 
Oct 25, 2017
4,989
There is money in a game-streaming service with a very strict ToS that makes it safe for women and minorities to stream games. I wish that I had the know-how to pursue the creation of such a business.
 

Chaos2Frozen

Member
Nov 3, 2017
11,259
This really is something. But if people are getting emotional support out of this who am I to throw stones?
 
Oct 26, 2017
3,301
Can I pay them to help me get some wins in Apex? They don’t have to talk.
I mean, you joke but arent there people who you can pay to unlock achievements/trophies in games for you?

On topic, I suppose pretty much any girl playing online is gonna have to put up with creepy weirdos so I guess this way she can set the terms herself and make some pocket money at the same time.
 
Oct 25, 2017
12,500
Seems very sad to pay just to get a girl to play a video game with you.
I can see having trouble meeting people irl but on video games it is so easy, make an actual friend that lasts and isn't charging you.
 

Kendall

Banned
Apr 22, 2019
490
Once I started using voice chat, I noticed i was treated differently.. I've gotten a few weird DM's on Xbox Live too. Not many lately, but back in the 360 days when recording voice messages were a thing
 

Wetwork

Avenger
Oct 27, 2017
1,996
Colorado
I wonder if this actually helps people open up if you're paying for it? I have many women friends. More than men currently, and I've seen them cry, and scream, and yell, and rant, and want, and all around open up to me- but I have HUGE issues opening up. Like, one friend who's told me a lot of,"i've never told anyone this yet" things I had to pull away to finally crack my shell, and I didn't even break it. I sat and gave her my situation without a shred of emotion, while she just listened. I didn't feel better, I didn't get to process the emotions I wanted, and it felt like just a conversation. Some kind of inherent fear of opening up to anyone.

Geniunely have issues onnecting with people outside of them letting see a smiling, always happy human that wants the best for everyone. Huh. This post did not go the way i thought it would.
 
Oct 25, 2017
6,688
England
One of the reasons I like Apex is I can just mute the randoms and turn off my mic. The pings are great and I don't need to bother with the same crap from the hundredth guy that week that thinks he's funny.
 
Oct 27, 2017
209
I’ll play games with you guys for $5.
I'll only charge $4.

In all seriousness, it's really just a sad reflection of how more lonely people feel this age despite being more connected via online games and other means. I know for a fact that my face to face contact with others is more limited now than it was before high speed internet and smart phones became commonplace. Heck that's even true at work, where lots of my coworkers are remote.
 
Oct 25, 2017
6,156
User Banned (1 Month): dismissing concerns surrounding mental health
Hard to sort out my thoughts on this.

But one thing is for sure, it's fucked up that the world has made it so that this is the only way some men can get some semblance of emotional support.

Toxic masculinity really fucks up young men.
Nah some men are just not fit to breed. They would be weeded out in a more natural environment.
 

PSqueak

Member
Oct 25, 2017
12,464
Nah some men are just not fit to breed. They would be weeded out in a more natural environment.
What does breeding have anything to do with emotional support that every human being should have access to but boys are denied because "boy's are supposed to tuff it out" and "boys don't cry" and "Boys shouldn't talk about their feelings"?

Do you believe the only emotional support a man should get comes from a wife/GF/mate? that's the kind of shit that fucks over both men and women, because it means men don't have any emotional support for most of their lives and then they unload the entirety of their baggage on ONE person who has to sort out a lifetime of emotional neglect.
 

noyram23

The Fallen
Oct 25, 2017
6,802
I hope these boys can get proper therapy but it's good that they have an outlet at least
 
Oct 25, 2017
6,156
What does breeding have anything to do with emotional support that every human being should have access to but boys are denied because "boy's are supposed to tuff it out" and "boys don't cry" and "Boys shouldn't talk about their feelings"?

Do you believe the only emotional support a man should get comes from a wife/GF/mate? that's the kind of shit that fucks over both men and women, because it means men don't have any emotional support for most of their lives and then they unload the entirety of their baggage on ONE person who has to sort out a lifetime of emotional neglect.
If they had girlfriends they wouldn't need to pay women to play games with them. If you are are just talking friendship then sure everyone need that kind of emotional. Most of the people that unload their baggage as you put are those that have deemed socially unfit to date though. Are you denying that?
 

PSqueak

Member
Oct 25, 2017
12,464
If they had girlfriends they wouldn't need to pay women to play games with them. If you are are just talking friendship then sure everyone need that kind of emotional. Most of the people that unload their baggage as you put are those that have deemed socially unfit to date though. Are you denying that?
But what does dating have anything to do with the problem of boys not being allowed to talk their feelings or getting emotional support from people who are not their romantic partners? And again, what does "breeding" have to do with the fact that men are denied emotional support and further scarred due to an environment of toxic masculinity? for the fucking record, it's not a girlfriend's job to be the sole emotional support of men, they're your partners not your therapists.

You're being part of the problem by focusing on the fact that these guys have failed to live up to the standard of masculinity and you have deemed them "unfit to breed", the point is, toxic masculinity has failed these men in not allowing them to have their emotional support to the point they have to get it from strangers on the internet they're paying to play fortnite with.

Do you not see how fucked up this is?
 

Chaos2Frozen

Member
Nov 3, 2017
11,259
Speaking personally, for me it's less that I'm embarrassed to unload on to other people (friends and family and whoever) and more like I feel that I'm burdening them with my problems.

So many people have to deal with worse shit than me.
 

-PXG-

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,588
NJ
Sometimes I wish I was a woman. So many stupid men just dying to throw money away for the slightest amount of attention. I'd be fucking HUSTLING and making bank. Definitely comes with a lot of bullshit and creeps. But with enough determination and thick skin, at the end of the day, getting paid for basically doing nothing, ain't so bad.
 

moeman

Member
Oct 25, 2017
230
If they had girlfriends they wouldn't need to pay women to play games with them. If you are are just talking friendship then sure everyone need that kind of emotional. Most of the people that unload their baggage as you put are those that have deemed socially unfit to date though. Are you denying that?
Your line of thinking sadly perpetuates the stereotype of toxic masculinity.
 

Chaos2Frozen

Member
Nov 3, 2017
11,259
If they had girlfriends they wouldn't need to pay women to play games with them. If you are are just talking friendship then sure everyone need that kind of emotional. Most of the people that unload their baggage as you put are those that have deemed socially unfit to date though. Are you denying that?
"If they had girlfriends they wouldn't need to pay women to play games with them" - I guess

"If you are are just talking friendship then sure everyone need that kind of emotional" - Sure

"Most of the people that unload their baggage as you put are those that have deemed socially unfit to date though" - Wait, what??
 

Wulfric

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,186
That sounds kind of sad. But as long as everyone is happy and boundaries are clear, have at it.
 

Lord of Ostia

Member
Oct 27, 2017
15,771
Nah some men are just not fit to breed. They would be weeded out in a more natural environment.
I know you already got banned, but holy shit at this comment. Literally the poster boy for toxic masculinity right here, this is such a disgusting thing to say. They are human beings just like you and deserve dignity and respect. I just can't even fathom saying something like this about someone.
 

Nothing Loud

Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,646
Good for her on making income, but this is very concerning.
I understand that some online gamer dudes struggle deeply with social anxiety or depression that the idea of leaving their home to pay a REAL therapist to help them with their issues is inconceivable, but they really should be doing that if they want to really solve their problems instead spending income on fake video game companionship. I guess it's not my place to judge. It's just that I see the online video game community as one that is privileged and relatively wealthy (buying expensive consoles, graphics cards, games on release, etc. shit) and it's really sad when people prioritize spending money on that than their own mental health,. This community would be better off if more people saw therapists. Disclaimer: I see a counselor at least twice a month for two years now. I feel better having spent money on that than any worldly possession I own.