Hey all, I've been having a lot of trouble with my friendships lately. Seems like all my friends and I don't talk at all anymore. I'll text people regularly and get no response, and when they do respond it's just a short text basically acknowledging mine and that's it. I feel really disconnected from my friends, I don't hang out with any of them anymore. I try making plans but everyone is either busy with work or has plans of other kinds. A lot of my friends are in relationships now. I've mentioned this to a few friends, and they understand how I feel.
I don't think they're ignoring me on purpose, and if they could they would spend time with me. But still it's hard, especially because my friends are really important to me. Struggling with depression, my friends have been 100% amazing in that regard about supporting me, much more than even my family. I'm a very guarded person too, it's really hard for me to trust people because of past issues with my family, so I don't make friends super well and even when I do it takes a long time for me to fully trust them. I have friends I've known for over a decade that I have a hard time fully trusting still. It's an issue that I've gotten better with over time. And they know it too, which makes it even more amazing that they still want to be my friend.
Some of them tell me that I need to make new friends, but I'm awful at that. All my friends are friends by accident. I'm shy but I actually really like talking to people, I just have a hard time believing people want to to talk to me and want to be my friend. My therapist suggested going to a bar and meeting people, but that sounds like a bad idea. I'm not gonna be that dude hanging out at the bar by himself.
What do you guys recommend on how to make new friends? Or should I just continue being lonely dork boy and focus on other things?
I don't think they're ignoring me on purpose, and if they could they would spend time with me. But still it's hard, especially because my friends are really important to me. Struggling with depression, my friends have been 100% amazing in that regard about supporting me, much more than even my family. I'm a very guarded person too, it's really hard for me to trust people because of past issues with my family, so I don't make friends super well and even when I do it takes a long time for me to fully trust them. I have friends I've known for over a decade that I have a hard time fully trusting still. It's an issue that I've gotten better with over time. And they know it too, which makes it even more amazing that they still want to be my friend.
Some of them tell me that I need to make new friends, but I'm awful at that. All my friends are friends by accident. I'm shy but I actually really like talking to people, I just have a hard time believing people want to to talk to me and want to be my friend. My therapist suggested going to a bar and meeting people, but that sounds like a bad idea. I'm not gonna be that dude hanging out at the bar by himself.
What do you guys recommend on how to make new friends? Or should I just continue being lonely dork boy and focus on other things?