I didn’t stay on a job because the owner was too religious.

Slipknot666

Member
Dec 1, 2017
1,489
About a month ago I was looking for a job and a guy who owns a small construction company asked me to work for him and I say yes at first.

I came to work the first day(Thursday) and while working, one of the other guy started to talk about going to church to another guy when the boss came in and asked me if I go to church which I said no because I don’t believe in any god.

I didn’t think anything at the time so the next day he invited me to go his house and told me that every Friday they(him and the workers) always get together for dinner and stuff.

The soon as I got to the house he started talking to me(because I was the new guy) about religion and I thought; well he is going to talks for like 5 minutes and move on to other subjects...ohh boy I was very wrong. The religion talk was for about 2 hours and basically it was just him talking to me while everyone there were looking at me and I could at least see that most the workers were religious too. He talked about the bible, miracles, David and Goliath, prophets, why everything is gods plan and etc. I was very uncomfortable at the whole situation because I didn’t believe in anything he said and was basically nodding the whole time while thinking to myself when this was going to stop.

Then he told me that he was like me but then saw the light and blah blah so I saw were this was going

I left the house in a sour note but went to work next week and he will occasionally keep telling me about god and church...

Anyway the company closed for holidays and I was supposed to call him back early this month but I didn’t.

The guy was a good guy but I just couldn’t be in that environment. I don’t care about your religion, you can believe in whatever you want but I don’t want to hear sermons from anybody and don’t expect me to become a believer.
 

ReAxion

Member
Oct 26, 2017
3,653
i heard a story about this on a podcast yesterday. the guy in your position decided he would remedy this by going to a church exclusively to use their bathroom for brown time, that way he could tell his boss what specific church he attended and maybe even some details about the sermon.
 

Mammoth Jones

Member
Oct 25, 2017
6,328
New York
Yea, that's annoying as shit. I have family members do that to me. And I believe in God, just not church. I have a deep hatred for churches and their hypocrisy. I can't imagine a boss doing that. Isn't that illegal?

Sadly many organized religions have this rule that their members must always be trying to "save souls". My thing is that approach is dogshit. The best approach I ever experienced was a christian buddy who never preached. Never pushed it on me. He was just a good ass friend and a great person. It wasn't until I asked HIM about some shit and he was willing to walk me through his belief system. But other than that...wasn't a judgemental asshole.
 

Bane

The Fallen
Oct 27, 2017
1,995
You made the right call. I feel that if you'd stayed the more you didn't accept it the shittier things would have become.

Anyone that tries to shove their religion (including a lack of religion) down your throat is an asshole. Stay in your fucking lane.
 

ThreepQuest64

Avenger
Oct 29, 2017
3,459
Germany
Man, the scene you described could be out of a film script where everyone in town has a secret and you are about to uncover some sinister shit and end up either dead or killing some in order prevent the former. Especially that part where they were looking at you for his hour long talk. Creepy as fuck. I don't trust people who go full bible on people who don't even believe in it. I've seen too many movies where this went wrong at some point.
 

SteveWinwood

Member
Oct 25, 2017
8,339
USA USA USA
it might be painting with a broad brush

but in my experience construction has a lot of 'born again' or 'saved' people for various reasons

and everybody knows converts can be the most zealous
 
Oct 28, 2017
4,943
How’s your job situation now? Find a replacement? If you were intent on leaving due to this, why not at least directly tell them you are not looking to change your religious views and would like for your work to just be work? That is unless you found something better.
 
Jul 7, 2019
519
I would have done the same thing, OP. Shit freaks me out. Or I would have just said, “Hey, I appreciate your concern, but I’m just here to work, thanks.” I mean, you could probably still call and just say that.
 
Oct 27, 2017
6,069
I normally silently nod if I feel that a person is going to move on from a subject I don't want to talk about in a quick enough fashion, but I've had no qualms in the past outright saying the following, verbatim: "I don't want to talk about this anymore so drop the topic, it's upsetting me." And of course depending on the person, they still try to go on, but I end up repeating the exact same line until it stops. I'm definitely not cordial enough to listen to nonsense that I have no interest in hearing for more than 5 minutes, let alone 2 hours.
 

SillyEskimo

The Fallen
Oct 26, 2017
3,107
I kindly cut people off as soon as they start up and tell them in no uncertain terms that I am not interested in that conversation.

Religion preys on people that are kind and not trying to offend. Door knocking religions are the same way. They take advantage of kindness to shoehorn their way in. It is insidious.
 

Bigwombat

Member
Nov 30, 2018
1,226
Amen brother. I'm an atheist and it's a tricky situation sometimes. You want to be polite but there comes a moment, like in your situation, where enough is enough.

I lived in an old pool company lot that was converted to be housing for volunteers in Mississippi after Katrina; I was doing 10 months in americorps habitat for humanity. The housing was run by Presbyterians and habitat is a Christian organization but I never had people be assholes and in my face about religion. I was debaucherous too in my early 20s and there wasn't any judgment about my northern hedonistic lifestyle.
But I've been in opposite situations where you get bum rushed and hit over the head with religion. I'm always polite at first but I have had to get rude occasionally to total strangers.
 

staedtler

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
1,606
wow you didn't even have the courtesy to call him saying you appreciate the work but it's not gonna pan out because he spoke some god stuff? grow up
 
Oct 25, 2017
1,395
That sucks, OP. I’m sorry you had to deal with that shit, sounds like you made the right call.

It’s weird though, I’m a field engineer and work around laborers and operators all the time and I don’t think I’ve seen a single one that I would call religious.
 

Ebnas

Banned
May 15, 2019
160
Man, I sure wish I had the privilege to walk away from paying work because someone's too nice for their own good.
 

32X4LYF

alt account
Banned
Dec 25, 2019
220
So you couldn't even give the guy the courtesy to call him and say you won't be coming back, it's not going to work out? Because he was talking about God? That's pretty shitty.

Edit: Just realized staedtler said basically the same thing ha

Also this...

Man, I sure wish I had the privilege to walk away from paying work because someone's too nice for their own good.
 

naib

Member
Oct 25, 2017
613
I had something similar happen when I worked for a small business. But I was ostracized because I didn't want to participate in wrestling watch parties.

edit: I guess not that similar.
 

Papa Satanás

Member
Oct 25, 2017
783
no
I wonder if they all really do meet on Fridays, or if this was a special intervention/meeting just for you.

Frankly, I'd have quit. Working for religious people is fine, but these guys sounded like they were running on creep juice.

You could have given some notice, yes, but on the flip side, his conduct wasn't particularly professional either. Good riddance.
 

Camwi

The Fallen
Oct 27, 2017
3,884
The guy was a good guy but I just couldn’t be in that environment. I don’t care about your religion, you can believe in whatever you want but I don’t want to hear sermons from anybody and don’t expect me to become a believer.
He sounds like a fucking asshole. Anyone who tries to convert someone like that, especially an employer/employee relationship, is just a scumbag.
 

RS1984

Member
Dec 29, 2017
527
Man, the scene you described could be out of a film script where everyone in town has a secret and you are about to uncover some sinister shit and end up either dead or killing some in order prevent the former. Especially that part where they were looking at you for his hour long talk. Creepy as fuck. I don't trust people who go full bible on people who don't even believe in it. I've seen too many movies where this went wrong at some point.

 

mhayes86

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,703
Virginia
That would be uncomfortable, frustrating, and awkward as well for me. You made the right call if you're not okay with any of that.

My wife is actually a higher up at a small company that's part of a church. She's atheist, loves a lot of her co-workers, is mostly okay with the job itself (hates her boss most of the time), but does not like being part of a religious company. It's decent money and she's been looking for other jobs, but her skillset is limiting her choices. A few of her co-workers aren't religious since they're there for a job, but overall they just don't talk about it.
 

Thrill_house

Member
Oct 27, 2017
6,118
You made the right call. 20 minutes in I would have respectfully told him to cut out the bullshit I'm not in the market for it and left it at that. I've had friends religious family members try to pull stuff like that on me at BBQ's and such but never an employer. I give them a polite "I respect your beliefs, they just aren't for me" which is usually not enough so I just start mocking/ lightly teasing them if push hard. They got the hint after that.
 

Tain

Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,292
it's not enough for me to pay you less than your labor is worth and skim the rest as profit for myself, you also gotta shape your entire worldview to match mine and i'm gonna turn up the soft pressure until you do

yeah OP you made the right call
 

P-MAC

Member
Nov 15, 2017
2,390
Yeah guy's a fucking weirdo and I wouldn't be able to stand one hour with someone like that
 

Tuorom

Member
Oct 30, 2017
2,688
It's good you got out.

You were definitely in danger of being a lamb sacrifice to their God. Protect your organs at all costs.

LOL the entire time I'm reading this I'm glancing at your username and avatar
Lmao you made me notice. OP should have offered to play some of his music at their dinner so they all could get to know his tastes.
 

Force_XXI

Member
Oct 29, 2017
1,767
Would have never went to his house in the first place like others have said, not working to hang out and talk religion bs afterwards, Im doing this shit to make money so I can eat
 

kubev

Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,103
Pacifica, CA
You know, without knowing the story of how he "saw the light" and all, I can't really be too critical. I'm not religious, and I don't believe in God, but I know a lot of people who at least felt as though they had more strength because of the role that their faith played in getting them through some really hard times. It'd be nice if people like that gave themselves more credit, as I do think they mistake their personal inner strength and help from their loved ones and community for some sort of divine intervention, but religion does help a lot of people out in that sense, and it helps them to feel closer to their communities.

I don't think that would've caused me to not keep a job, as I'm generally pretty good about playing along and at the very least being respectful of other people's beliefs.

That said, the fact that he's a carpenter has me wondering whether he got into that line of work specifically because of Jesus. XD
 

Mass Effect

Member
Oct 31, 2017
6,361
I don’t blame you at all. Not sure I’d just stop going to work though. I’d probably just start looking for a new job ASAP.

But your first mistake was telling him you don’t believe. It’s usually much easier to say “sometimes” or “not recently, but I will again soon,” or even “my faith is private and I prefer to keep it that way” when it comes to people asking you at work. It’s really not worth dealing with tbh.

Man, I sure wish I had the privilege to walk away from paying work because someone's too nice for their own good.
Perhaps you’ll get there one day.
 
Oct 28, 2017
18,070
Just dont spend your free time with them. You bailed way too soon. But if you can pass up work then I guess it's all good.
 

Parch

Banned
Nov 6, 2017
3,360
I had a similar situation. I had been there awhile and knew there was a gang of religious folk, including my boss and immediate supervisor. It was easy enough to avoid and ignore their religious talk. We all got along fine and they liked my work.

Then one day we were at lunch and they asked me something about religion. I was just eating and not really paying attention, so I casually said I didn't know because I was atheist. They gasped in horror. It was like I shit on the table.

Immediately after that I began being treated differently. All of a sudden I couldn't do anything right. I couldn't be trusted. They criticized everything I did. Questioned my morality. It suddenly became a nightmare job and evidently clear that there was no future in this job. So I quit. All because one day I casually mentioned that I was atheist.
 

TaySan

Member
Dec 10, 2018
7,593
I don't blame you. People need to stop pushing their religion on others that are clearly not interested. Gross that hes using his position over you.
 
Apr 24, 2018
1,425
Geeze. I feel like I was five when my dad told me that people should never talk about certain topics (such as religion) at the workplace, including the possibility that said topics may make others uncomfortable. Sorry that your now former boss did that to you.

I had a good friend when I was younger whose father was a pastor and who used to try and indoctrinate me with his religious beliefs (I was of a different religion). I knew he was a good person, but it definitely was uncomfortable to hear some of the things that he said.
 

SpitztheGreat

Member
May 16, 2019
1,740
I had a somewhat similar experience about seven years ago.

My wife is a pretty spiritual person and grew up in a pretty relaxed, but involved, federated church. Because it is federated it has a wide array of members from different Christian sects since none have enough members for their own church. It's actually a pretty interesting setup and is very different from my Catholic upbringing. Because of where/how she grew up she didn't get exposed to other religions, including the more insane Christian denominations. This wasn't out of any malice, it just wasn't something that happened. When we started dating I wanted to be a good sport and show some support for her faith, even if I don't give a shit either way and would prefer to be left alone. This led to one of the most awkward nights of my life.

Ok, so with the background set

When we were still dating she was looking for churches to join in the area we lived and settled on this one that I instantly knew was on the evangelist side of things. My wife is a very trusting person and lacks my cynicism, so where I see crazy she only sees people passionate about god- even if I know they aren't going to share the same approach to religion. Anyways, she goes to a service or two (without me) and gets invited to join a small group of parishioners at a weekly bible group at the minister's house. She asks me to go and I agree (which I'm actually very thankful I did) but I didn't really know what I'm getting in to. On our way to the house she's describing more about this church and its service and warning bells are going off in my head. She's talking about large screens where speakers from other church's across the country can address the congregation, people feeling the "holy spirit" running through them, some people crying, and lots of loud amens.

We get to the house and BAM, it hits me like a ton of fucking bricks, these people are out to lunch and I want nothing to do with them. They can instantly tell that not only am I not a church going kind of person, but that I am both uncomfortable and an unwilling participant. Everyone was nice enough, but the talk of fire and brimstone can't be masked no matter how much you think you're a sly speaker. There was a lot of talk about how god was challenging them on a daily basis, and how many of them often felt alone and abandoned, but they knew that was just God's way of testing them. One woman told a story about how, when she was trying to learn more about Islam, she became very confused and was afraid that god was going to leave her, and how she collapsed on the floor of her kitchen sobbing and praying for god to show her the way. Miraculously he did come back to her and here she was- able to preach about God's love; a god that seemingly everyone there was afraid would leave them at any moment and had done so in the past.

At some point early on before dinner I texted my mom and said something to the effect of "I'm at a bible study with crazy people. This isn't a joke. Call me in an hour and do not stop calling until I answer."

After dinner we broke off into groups, the men and the women. This is where things got intense and I couldn't fake it. Throughout dinner I had been mostly quiet but polite, but in this smaller setting I had to participate and I simply lacked the understanding, vocabulary, or interest, to contribute much. The men droned on about the challenges they face in a modern world, how being the breadwinner is so difficult, how society was constantly challenging them, blah blah blah. Eventually we came back as a group and were reading passages from the bible. It was fucking awful. You read a passage and everyone discusses it. Thing is that you got to choose your passage, but if you don't know a passage to pick that isn't much help. As we're making our way around the circle my mom starts to call me; and let me tell you I have never been happier to have my mother call me.

I stepped outside and explain the situation. Frankly it was pretty humorous. My mom (who is a pretty good Catholic) was mystified why I was there, and then was scared for me when i described these people. But that phone call gave me the opening I needed. I went back inside and when I got an opening I said to my wife "Hey, that was my mom, we need to get going." To her credit she understood the message and we left. I made her promise she would never go back to that church and she agreed- but didn't immediately understand why. But as the days went by, and as we talked about the night, it slowly dawned on her just how wacky those people were and how their sense of religion did not jive with hers at all.

It was an absolutely surreal night. I tell this story often, sometimes it's a comedy and sometimes it's a horror.
 
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Papa Satanás

Member
Oct 25, 2017
783
no
You know, without knowing the story of how he "saw the light" and all, I can't really be too critical. I'm not religious, and I don't believe in God, but I know a lot of people who at least felt as though they had more strength because of the role that their faith played in getting them through some really hard times. It'd be nice if people like that gave themselves more credit, as I do think they mistake their personal inner strength and help from their loved ones and community for some sort of divine intervention, but religion does help a lot of people out in that sense, and it helps them to feel closer to their communities.

I don't think that would've caused me to not keep a job, as I'm generally pretty good about playing along and at the very least being respectful of other people's beliefs.

That said, the fact that he's a carpenter has me wondering whether he got into that line of work specifically because of Jesus. XD
You can love your religion and be deeply invested, and also respect other peoples' boundaries. OP informed them before this dinner that he wasn't religious. It was on them to respect that.
 

Hokahey

Member
Oct 28, 2017
2,272
I have found that at most any small company the management team all subscribe to a similar belief system. That could be atheism, it could be Christianity, it could be a particular political persuasion, Etc.

Lots of people believe lots of things contrary to what I believe in. And unless it is blatantly hurtful to others or blatantly impacting my career I've never sweated it much. And yes, I know. Anyone that believes anything other than what you believe in are hurting somebody. They feel the same way about you probably.
 

muteKi

Member
Oct 22, 2018
11,903
a sunken pirate ship
Yea, that's annoying as shit. I have family members do that to me. And I believe in God, just not church. I have a deep hatred for churches and their hypocrisy. I can't imagine a boss doing that. Isn't that illegal?
It's happening off the clock and is (theoretically) voluntary. If as I suspect OP is American then the labor laws are not going to do anything about this.
 

Wolfe

Member
Sep 3, 2018
313
your first mistake was telling him you don’t believe. It’s usually much easier to say “sometimes” or “not recently, but I will again soon,” or even “my faith is private and I prefer to keep it that way” when it comes to people asking you at work. It’s really not worth dealing with tbh.
Naw that wasn't a mistake, OP made the right call. Personally I ain't gonna lie to someone just to be polite about something I have no interest or belief in. You can be polite and respectful without lying to someone just for the sake of it seeming to be the easier option for getting out of that situation. Besides in the end they should respect that it's none of their business.
 

The Albatross

Member
Oct 25, 2017
11,532
I wouldn't quit a job over someone being religious, but I definitely wouldn't go to the Bible group things either. I used to work at a Catholic College, and they had religious events around Easter, CHristmas, etc., but it was opt-in only. They'd usually have a priest do a short blessing before major events, like graduation, etc. It worked out well for me because I got ~2 weeks off at Christmas and like ~6 days off at Easter, pretty sweet.

These days I work with a lot of Hindu folks, some more religious than others. It's usually cool. Going out to group lunches is the only pain in the ass because we can only go to a handful of places for the few people who are really conservative Hindu and need to have the food prepared in a specific way. So, it's always this mediocre East Asian restaurant or an equally mediocre Biriyani place.