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I hate having to poop.

jdh96

jdh96

One Winged Slayer
Member
Jan 25, 2020
1,705
Like, seriously why the hell couldn't we have just evolved to the point as a species where we don't need to poop anymore? I hate everything about pooping, i hate having to use it i hate when you get cramps because you need to go, and i can not stand for the life of me having to wipe or when you encounter the dreaded "endless wipe" it's shitty.
 
bonch00ski

bonch00ski

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
3,813
I love the feeling you get when you pee....sometimes mid stream I'll stop and hold for a second or two and then just punch out and it kinda feels good.
 
PAFenix

PAFenix

Unshakable Resolve
Member
Nov 21, 2019
14,652
I hate it too. But it feels good after a much needed one.

Wait it's not the weekend yet......Shit.
 
Ravelle

Ravelle

Member
Oct 31, 2017
17,792
Pooping is a moment of rest during work hours.

Also if you poop long enough that you require a entertainment on your phone, you need to watch your diet. ;p
 
FaceHugger

FaceHugger

Banned
Oct 27, 2017
13,949
USA
Get a bottle of witch hazle and dose the TP in it for the first few wipes. It's the next best thing to a bidet IMO. Cleans your bung and is also an astringent. It's not ideal but it gets the job done.
 
Mendrox

Mendrox

Banned
Oct 26, 2017
9,439
jdh96 said:
Like, seriously why the hell couldn't we have just evolved to the point as a species where we don't need to poop anymore? I hate everything about pooping, i hate having to use it i hate when you get cramps because you need to go, and i can not stand for the life of me having to wipe or when you encounter the dreaded "endless wipe" it's shitty.
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Eat healthy and a shit takes a few seconds and there is most often nothing to wipe or visible anymore.
 
Pbae

Pbae

Member
Oct 26, 2017
3,242
OP I get you. I too want to photosynthesize and get this ritual over with. I type this as I struggle to birth what feels like quadruplets on the shitter.
 
Kromeo

Kromeo

Member
Oct 27, 2017
17,850
There's far bigger incoveniences than having to spend 2 minutes a day in the bathroom
 
Zyrox

Zyrox

One Winged Slayer
Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,624
Taking a shit after a long day of work is one of life's simplest yet greatest pleasures.
 
Astral

Astral

Member
Oct 27, 2017
28,094
Pooping can be so relaxing. I do hate that endless wipe thing you're talking about though. It's made me late for work so many times in the past.
 

viskod

Member
Nov 9, 2017
4,396
Taking a shit gives me the few moments out of my day where no one can get to me to bother me about things. It's like the only moment where I'm completely immune to work and family and it's ALL MINE.
 
Noppie

Noppie

Member
Oct 27, 2017
13,766
Bobo Dakes said:
Hard to feel comfortable on a toilet I know other people regularly sit on. It's awkward if someone else comes in. Work TP sucks. Every you sit with will notice if you were gone for a while.
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That's why you always take the same amount of time regardless of what business you're doing. Pee, poo, whatever. 10 minutes every time. On the clock, of course.
 
Indy in the Fridge

Indy in the Fridge

Banned
Oct 30, 2017
15,278
janusff said:
i feel a shit coming on right now as a matter of fact
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486.jpg
 
mute

mute

▲ Legend ▲
Member
Oct 25, 2017
25,073
I'd probably stop eating if there was some other alternative that meant I wouldn't have to worry about this.

It sucks going to the gastro doc for the first time in what feels like a decade almost and asking if there have been any advancements or new meds that might make it suck less and hearing "nope, just keep doing what you are doing"
 

QuigleyMcShine

Member
Jan 29, 2018
9,390
It's not ideal, even after drastically improving my diet the last couple of years and starting fiber supplements.
 
Christian

Christian

Member
Oct 25, 2017
9,636
Imagine complaining about this when I have a sack of liquid shit that hangs off the front of my stomach and that I have to empty about 20 times a day. You should be grateful, OP.
 
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