So a little background. Not with his mom anymore, but I helped raise him since he was five. His mom was fed up with him for this exact type of thing and he spent some time with grandparents and eventually moved in with me. Initially, it was only temporary because he had friends that he was supposed to move in with in a few months. That fell through, and I actually told him, yes, you can stay with me, but you will have to get a job and pay some rent. That was like, at least, a month and a half to two months ago. I finally gave him two weeks notice- find a job or you are out. Literally, with only a day or two left, he said he got the job.
Here's the thing also. He's led his life up till this point having his hand held through everything and it has left him with a kid in the burbs (hour and a half away), no job, no GED, and no license. He is a good kid, I actually like having him around, and he is great with my two small children I have. When I have talks with him about getting his life in order, I genuinely think he believes in what I am saying and I believe, in the moment, he wants to do those things. Unfortunately, when it comes time to make the right decisions, he falls back into his bad habits. Lying, laziness, lack of any motivation. I do worry that, because of where his life is right now that he could be depressed (and I'm sure completely overwhelmed), but getting him to open up about anything like that is near impossible. Also, his mom has tried to take him to counselors and therapists in the past and he has no interest in taking part. From what I have learned about therapy, if you are not engaged in the process, it will not work.
I'm at the point where I feel horrible that I can't help him but I can't enable this behavior any longer if he is lying to me.
This is more background than I was initially willing to give, but reading some of the responses, I felt it necessary.