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I've met more than 10 cases where women left their partners because they were addicted to League of Legends.
- Thread starter Era of not Yakuza
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All online games with long matches have this problem. Not only are online games addicting, it's not like it's COD where the matches can be ~15 mins max.
I was friends with a couple of people that lost their SO's because they played Everquest too much, one also for WoW so this doesn't surprise me although I know nothing of LoL. I play WoW quite a bit but I am not going to ignore my family for it, and if my wife called me right now and said delete that shit, it would be gone.
^ this yeah. It's weird to me and maybe because it's a game forum specifically, but there are so many vices and addictions in the world that it seems odd that gaming is seen as such a black sheep compared to a lot of others I've experienced that are still seen as "okay."
Like I remember my father being a huge dick about my gametime when I was a kid while he'd sit on his ass drinking watching every Nascar special or spend many a 4am freezing his ass off just for a chance to shoot at a deer in the middle of nowhere.
To act like gaming addiction A.) doesn't exist or B.) Is something to be made a big deal out of is interesting. On one hand people could be "raising awareness" but most of the times it's to demonize and/or insult people who have a hobby that in the grand scheme of things is usually less destructive than some others. Exceptions to every generality and all that aside, I agree that it's no surprise that some people would have issues with gaming addiction.
But I'm also the guy who thinks "playing games a lot" isn't addiction and I find it hilarious that most of the time people are okay with alcoholism, sports fanatics, etc but draw the line at "he plays too many games with his friends." lol
If governments are putting regulations on loot boxes because of addictive destructive effects on people. Should the government also regulate amount of gaming time? Arent both things just as damaging to people?
I already feel bad when I play 3 hours of battlefield under the week....
Personally, I don't know anybody that really struggled in their private life due to gaming though, although a friend of mine got close sometimes.
Personally, I don't know anybody that really struggled in their private life due to gaming though, although a friend of mine got close sometimes.
These games are designed to feed into the same mechanisms that drive gambling addictions, so it's no surprise that it hooks people. Before LOL it was World of Warcraft that trod a very similar path. I spent a good decade in that game, luckily for me I told myself I wouldn't install it until I had finished my university exams. Close call!
My girlfriend goes through periods where she plays a lot of League, 3-4 hours a day. She doesn't drop her responsibilities for it, though, she works full time and goes to school.
We used to play together, but I generally quit playing because the community was too toxic. During these couple week periods, I just spend more time doing my own personal hobbies.
It isn't an issue for us, but I can see how it could be.
We used to play together, but I generally quit playing because the community was too toxic. During these couple week periods, I just spend more time doing my own personal hobbies.
It isn't an issue for us, but I can see how it could be.
I played a ton when I first started back in 2012. But now I barely play cause my wrist starts to hurt after like 2 games.
Never heard of it breaking people up but i believe it. In my circles, Dota 2 is spoken about in the past tense and we all pretty much agree the game is very good but the time commitment is way too high. The game is also "stressful" to play well and you kinda have to "come down" after playing, which really makes it tough to fit into a late evening play session. I imagine LOL is very similar.
I have a friend who is still all in (thousands of hours), but their SO puts up with it as far as I can tell.
I have a friend who is still all in (thousands of hours), but their SO puts up with it as far as I can tell.
I think it gets its claws into you more when you become part of group of players. Then there's peer pressure added. You feel pressure to play when your friends are playing and you don't feel like you can exit out mid match. There's definitely been times where I told myself I was going to be productive on a specific night but get a message from my friends that they're on Overwatch. I've stayed up later than I should on some week nights playing due to that.
Overwatch luckily has short games compared to LoL but it still has this way of making you want to play one more until one becomes ten. The only game I played for a bit that had matches up to an hour was Paragon lol. Why did I play that? My friends were playing it. I didn't even like the game but I was still up at like 1AM finishing a game up.
Back in 2011-2013, I was pretty damn addicted to League. My girlfriend at the time (now wife) was definitely not happy with how much I played the game. It has a culture of, when you're in a game (which can last up to 60 minutes, sometimes longer), you're fully committed to that game. So if your SO needs help with something it's "wait til this game is over please." And then when it was over, you quickly did the thing that needed done, then it was right back in. That's not good.
Luckily I finally got unaddicted. I think it was just a mix of burnout with the game, a new game coming along elsewhere (monster hunter probably), and my wife expressing her dislike for that game. I only play it maybe one night a month now.
Luckily I finally got unaddicted. I think it was just a mix of burnout with the game, a new game coming along elsewhere (monster hunter probably), and my wife expressing her dislike for that game. I only play it maybe one night a month now.
I don't think that's the issue here. Most League players are solo players.
People are competitive and they like the feeling that comes with winning. Games like League and Dota 2 are more rewarding than most games when it comes to the feeling of wins and losses because the matches are so long and require so much effort. Nobody wants to exit out of a match unless they're sure losses because you're investing time, talent, and rank into it. Further, there are rank tiers that unlock exclusive rewards to further show your skill level.
Winning (or the prospect therein) is the driver of time spent, along with the games being technically sound and reasonably balanced. And as that old saying goes, "time flies when you're having fun", a few matches of League or Dota can set you back 3-4 hours without even really noticing if you're not watching the clock. They're like playing multiple Monopoly or Chess matches in rapid succession. 15 minutes in League or Dota = the match has barely started. Couple that with people perhaps not feeling empowered at home or at work and you get lost jobs and broken marriages.
Ah, see I never played league so I wasn't aware of that. Still, I do think if you're part of a "team" playing these games it's definitely an additional factor making it harder to let go.
If you have a friend or two that play regularly, sure. Partying up gives you more to look forward when playing, more confidence that your team will win, and an additional social outlet/sphere to enjoy. But that's true of literally any game. What game isn't better and more playable with friends? It's not any more or less different in a MOBA other than the commitment in any given match is longer.
It's amazing what 6-24 months of concerted effort can do for your life. Good on you for doing this.
Lots of other people could benefit from that mindset. Set a goal for the next year, and fucking go for it, addictions/roadblocks be damned.
I guess my logic there was that with a team, there's added social pressures to getting on to play. Not that the problem is friends but that it amplifies the issue. Like you said, nobody wants to exit out of a match because they've invested time, talent and rank into it but with the added social element, you'd also be letting down your teammates, pissing off the group you're in because now their time, talent and rank was wasted due to you.
It, like many other modern video games, is a psychological and sociological snare designed to rope people in and keep them hooked to the drip and singing its praises, to where it/they dominate people's lives not unlike a cult/drug addiction/powerful addictions, more generally.
I'd type more, but I don't have the time atm. So apologies for drive-by'ing!
I'd type more, but I don't have the time atm. So apologies for drive-by'ing!
That this happens isn't a surprise. What is surprising however is that OP knows 10 instances of it.
We shouldn't victim blame when the products are designed to trigger addiction.
I'm sure Destiny 2 (and other GAAS-titles) have caused a lot of divorces as well.
What the fuck is this
You would delete your WOW characters? That's strong.
It's not more or less than any other game.
But again, the commitment to getting on and playing a MOBA is longer and requires more focus than just about any other game. But the social pressure isn't any more significant. If you're good or your friends are on they will invite you and if you want to play you play. If you have some shit to do, you have some shit to do.
If you know you don't have at least an hour that you can safely block off (because matches can last that long or even longer), people will be upset that you joined the group at all, as joining and having to leave early means wasting the time of 4-9 other people. People are happy to play without you or wait until you do have time to play. In my years of playing both League and Dota, I've never seen anyone pressured to play a match if they didn't want to play or have time to play.
I'm talking about people who really get addicted to this, not your average player if that wasn't clear.
OP
OP
I just asked my English teacher if I've made a mistake in the title 😂😂
He said that their was referring to partners so that is that hahahaha but I will ask mods to change to (not saying that my English is perfect, it's far from it, I just found it very funny)
" I've met more than 10 cases where women broke up their relationships because their partners were addicted to league of legends"
my doctoral advisor's husband told me that with 10 cases I could make a poster for a congress and have a good discussion about the subject.
I really appreciate the input you guys gave to me about this. Skins, looot boxes, long matchs, friends/teams, being very competitive, all this helps to make the game more addictive
He said that their was referring to partners so that is that hahahaha but I will ask mods to change to (not saying that my English is perfect, it's far from it, I just found it very funny)
" I've met more than 10 cases where women broke up their relationships because their partners were addicted to league of legends"
Yep
my doctoral advisor's husband told me that with 10 cases I could make a poster for a congress and have a good discussion about the subject.
I really appreciate the input you guys gave to me about this. Skins, looot boxes, long matchs, friends/teams, being very competitive, all this helps to make the game more addictive
A cool reminder that videogames never need microtransaction to be addicitive in the first place.
Also guys, just this one time try to be mindful that judging people you don't know because of something posted in the internet is immature, if not downrigth ignorant. Lets all "grow up" not "only physically".
Also guys, just this one time try to be mindful that judging people you don't know because of something posted in the internet is immature, if not downrigth ignorant. Lets all "grow up" not "only physically".
Yeah. A good game of Dota 2 (and I presume LoL is no different) is something well, well beyond what any singleplayer game could ever provide for me if I'm being honest. Unless you've experienced it yourself, you would probably never understand. Which makes all the "Valve makes no games" threads all the more bizarre, because good Dota games aren't that rare, and virtually all of them are better and more intense than any singleplayer experience you will ever have. MOBAs are terrifyingly addictive.
Yep. Behavioural addictions are totally a thing. When it comes to games (and a lot of the other behavioural addictions), I find people often aren't looking at the underlying. Ok - so someone is addicted to gaming.. why? Trauma? Comorbid mental health issues (anxiety, depression)? Life stressors?
I feel like another thing is that for me, it can be a sort of lose-lose when I finish a match.
- If I win a match, I get happy and I have this sort of "high" that makes me want to play another match to win it.
- If I lose a match, I don't like the prospect of my last match for the night being a lost and try to play another match to get a victory.
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*Many hours later*
You get up, feeling dizzy and looking at the clock, thinking damn, it is already tomorrow. I guess I will do the work tomorrow...
If you acknowledge this it is probably time to stop playing at all.
Believe me, I've been DOTA 2-Free for a long time, but hearing AngriestPat talk about League of Legends on Castle Super Beast almost tempted me, but I'm holding strong.
Begin to set limits on your play time and/or match count. "2 matches, no matter what happens." for example.
Your approach is how people wind up barefooted and broke in Las Vegas. "Just one more round". Just about everyone can identify with the feeling you're talking about and the mistake. NOBODY likes to go to bed on a loss. Especially in ranked play. But MOBA matches are just too long and you can be waiting for that "next win" for 5 hours. As you've probably found before. Further, fatigue can start affecting you and your decision making, communication, and reaction speeds and you won't even realize it. I strongly encourage you to start your play sessions with time or count match limits as the priority. Some days will be all L's. Some days will be all W's. But you will appreciate the control you feel over your lifetime. I promise.
Gambling (specifically casinos) is its own can of worms in regards to how it screws your life over. Lootboxes are just digital gambling, so it makes sense that they ideally should be regulated in the same way that casinos are (which changes based on country).
If they want to tackle gaming addiction, then they should apply those rules consistently to any other activity that people can spend too much time with. Netflix, YouTube, browsing Resetera, drinking, going hunting every weekend and ignoring your kids and wife, etc. And if they do decide to tackle all those, then they would have to have some way of monitoring across all hobbies, otherwise you could game the system by playing League for your allotted game time today and then marathon The Office again for the 32nd time.
That's pretty hard to regulate. And also incredibly scary. So no, the government should not monitor how you spend your time and decide what you can and can't do. It's easier (and far more ethical) to look at the companies and tell them to smarten up (fine them hard if they don't and remove their product from the market) instead of monitoring individuals. If companies are deciding to put out games known to be harmful and addictive, then those games should come with adequate warnings and information so that people can make educated decisions before taking the risk. Riot should be on the line and responsible for players that get addicted to their product. Riot should be on the line for funding gaming addiction rehab centers.
I've been through this, first with Team Fortress 2 through 2007-2010 and then with Dota2 from 2011-15.
In that gap between 2010-11 I lost 35kg, started studying and made lots of close friends. When dota2 took over I drifted away from my social circles, stopped sleeping properly and put on about 45kg, which I'm only just now losing again.
The worst part about the whole experience is that a lot of the time I wasn't even really enjoying what I was doing. I'd get angry, punch my desk when things went poorly, and hurl some pretty vitriolic shit at my teammates if they weren't performing up to my standards at the time. The highs of winning felt just good enough that I'd keep re-queuing just trying to get another 'hit', but I recognize now that I was displaying the same patterns of behavior as any other addict.
The biggest issue with the MOBA/MMO genres is that when you start a session, you're essentially locked in for a period of time. You're not supposed to leave a MOBA match after it starts so once you click that matchmaking button you're agreeing to give up an hour of your time. If things are going poorly and you're getting frustrated you're essentially trapped in that situation until it ends and ending the game requires the tacit permission of your team of strangers (in games with a forfeit function), or the enemy team of strangers (in games without one) who can delay the game and drag things out while leaving you essentially zero chance of turning things around. Once you've started playing, your sense of control over that hour of your life is greatly diminished, and it can be the most upsetting experience in the world.
These days I scratch my competitive gaming itch with Rocket League, since games are 5 minutes long and if you're not playing ranked you can just drop out at any time with zero penalty.
In that gap between 2010-11 I lost 35kg, started studying and made lots of close friends. When dota2 took over I drifted away from my social circles, stopped sleeping properly and put on about 45kg, which I'm only just now losing again.
The worst part about the whole experience is that a lot of the time I wasn't even really enjoying what I was doing. I'd get angry, punch my desk when things went poorly, and hurl some pretty vitriolic shit at my teammates if they weren't performing up to my standards at the time. The highs of winning felt just good enough that I'd keep re-queuing just trying to get another 'hit', but I recognize now that I was displaying the same patterns of behavior as any other addict.
The biggest issue with the MOBA/MMO genres is that when you start a session, you're essentially locked in for a period of time. You're not supposed to leave a MOBA match after it starts so once you click that matchmaking button you're agreeing to give up an hour of your time. If things are going poorly and you're getting frustrated you're essentially trapped in that situation until it ends and ending the game requires the tacit permission of your team of strangers (in games with a forfeit function), or the enemy team of strangers (in games without one) who can delay the game and drag things out while leaving you essentially zero chance of turning things around. Once you've started playing, your sense of control over that hour of your life is greatly diminished, and it can be the most upsetting experience in the world.
These days I scratch my competitive gaming itch with Rocket League, since games are 5 minutes long and if you're not playing ranked you can just drop out at any time with zero penalty.
OP
OP
Well, a strange thing happened recently.
I was on the beach celebrating the vacation with my BFF.
When I was coming back from the bathroom there was this girl, who was crying a lot, talking to my friend. I was very worried that something might have happened to my friend and got there fast. To my surprise, the girl was crying because her fiancé had broken up with her 1 week before (so she was crying because she missed him in the middle of a party). Soon after she started asking me if I played video games on my PC and if I played "CS" (Counter-Strike). Her ex-fiancé played Counter-Strike and also often left her alone, ignoring everything to play more. She said she would not hook up with men who play CS and made me promise that I don't play.
Not going to lie, after I received my diagnosis of ADHD and bipolar disorder, part of my time spent in psychotherapy involved learning to pay more attention to my obligations and to avoid doing non-important tasks compulsively.
I would play video games every time I felt depressed "until" I got well enough to do some work. The problem was being able to stop.
I have some new stories, now related to gaming addiction in general, and in two of them, the partner would immediately ignore his girlfriend after sex to play video games for hours.
One case was Fifa, where as soon as sex was over the boyfriend would turn on the PS4 and play for hours (today she speaks very badly of FIFA and PS4); and one case was Call of Duty, where she would visit the boyfriend's house (they live in different cities) and instead of him paying attention to the girlfriend, the guy would play COD until 7 o'clock in the morning, when she would get ready to go to work (in this case the ex-girlfriend speaks very badly of PC, COD, and Naruto).
It seems to me that we have a generation of men who grew up playing video games, and many of them can't organize their lives and end up playing too much.
I was on the beach celebrating the vacation with my BFF.
When I was coming back from the bathroom there was this girl, who was crying a lot, talking to my friend. I was very worried that something might have happened to my friend and got there fast. To my surprise, the girl was crying because her fiancé had broken up with her 1 week before (so she was crying because she missed him in the middle of a party). Soon after she started asking me if I played video games on my PC and if I played "CS" (Counter-Strike). Her ex-fiancé played Counter-Strike and also often left her alone, ignoring everything to play more. She said she would not hook up with men who play CS and made me promise that I don't play.
Not going to lie, after I received my diagnosis of ADHD and bipolar disorder, part of my time spent in psychotherapy involved learning to pay more attention to my obligations and to avoid doing non-important tasks compulsively.
I would play video games every time I felt depressed "until" I got well enough to do some work. The problem was being able to stop.
I have some new stories, now related to gaming addiction in general, and in two of them, the partner would immediately ignore his girlfriend after sex to play video games for hours.
One case was Fifa, where as soon as sex was over the boyfriend would turn on the PS4 and play for hours (today she speaks very badly of FIFA and PS4); and one case was Call of Duty, where she would visit the boyfriend's house (they live in different cities) and instead of him paying attention to the girlfriend, the guy would play COD until 7 o'clock in the morning, when she would get ready to go to work (in this case the ex-girlfriend speaks very badly of PC, COD, and Naruto).
It seems to me that we have a generation of men who grew up playing video games, and many of them can't organize their lives and end up playing too much.
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This is actually a genuine addiction. I can't really joke about something like this no matter how easy the punchline is.
Necro-bump but there are so many dismissive posts on that first page — and from what I can see at least — only one was deemed a bannable offence.
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