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LGBTQera |ERA1| (We're Queer)

Thequietone

Member
Oct 26, 2017
1,197
So this cute guy at work gave me my paperwork back with about 10 hearts written on it and he asked me if I liked them. I don't usually mess with coworkers, especially when technically he's a client. Still nice to know I'm attractive. I feel like everyone has the same self esteem issues but I always doubt my attractiveness. (Hard to explain, the company I work for works for the company he works for.)
 

Gibbs

Member
Oct 25, 2017
118
West Virginia
at work gave me my paperwork back with about 10 hearts written on it and he asked me if I liked them. I don't usually mess with coworkers, especially when technically he's a client. Still nice to know I'm attractive. I feel like everyone has the same self esteem issues but I always doubt my attractiveness. (Hard to explain, the company I work for works for the company he works for.)
ALL THE HEARTS <3! This is so sweet and I think sometimes its nice to be reminded that some view us in a light we don't see ourselves in.

Client or not, take them hearts(and him) and run.
 

Ryan7556

Member
Oct 27, 2017
899
Ontario, Canada
Anyone else here feel like they really need to be in an intimate relationship with someone else? The biggest issue is that I have several online friends who this would be theoretically possible with, but they're all too physically distant from me for anything realistic to happen.
 

harSon

Member
Oct 30, 2017
4,166
I'm recently out, and I'm pursuing my bisexuality for the first time recently. I'd been using Tinder for a while, but I thought I'd try Grindr. I wasn't prepared for this level of forwardness and openness. At all. I panicked, blocked a dude, and deleted my profile when he sent his location and he lived like two houses down from me on the same street.
 

Gibbs

Member
Oct 25, 2017
118
West Virginia
I'm recently out, and I'm pursuing my bisexuality for the first time recently. I'd been using Tinder for a while, but I thought I'd try Grindr. I wasn't prepared for this level of forwardness and openness. At all. I panicked, blocked a dude, and deleted my profile when he sent his location and he lived like two houses down from me on the same street.
Grindr is the worst admittedly. People are either too straight forward, or send you all the asshole pictures. Ironically you find out a lot about people on there, especially closeted men, or people who live too close for comfort as in your case.

I once had a guy meesage me on Grindr and said "we're in the same store and I'm following you lol." That was the end of that.

Congrats on coming out though! Live your truth! =)
 

Tanooki

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,063
Canada
Anyone else here feel like they really need to be in an intimate relationship with someone else? The biggest issue is that I have several online friends who this would be theoretically possible with, but they're all too physically distant from me for anything realistic to happen.
I feel that. I met a guy this weekend at a friend's Halloween party, and we hit it off pretty well. However, he lives two and a half hours away, which is enough to make me kinda weary about even perusing it. I'm the type that wants random cuddle nights middle of the week. :(
 

Ryan7556

Member
Oct 27, 2017
899
Ontario, Canada
I feel that. I met a guy this weekend at a friend's Halloween party, and we hit it off pretty well. However, he lives two and a half hours away, which is enough to make me kinda weary about even perusing it. I'm the type that wants random cuddle nights middle of the week. :(
Oh I meant like such friends I know are in the states, so that's 10+ hours away from me at the least. I live in Markham, Ontario, Canada (considered one of the 905 areas, right above Toronto).
 

Tanooki

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,063
Canada
Oh I meant like such friends I know are in the states, so that's 10+ hours away from me at the least. I live in Markham, Ontario, Canada (considered one of the 905 areas, right above Toronto).
Yeah, I got what you meant! I was just reinforcing it by saying even 2 hours can be daunting, 10+ would be way too difficult for me. It's not impossible, because I've heard of (and witnessed) plenty of long-distance relationships work out. But like you, I'm way too much of a "personal intimacy" type person for it to work, or even feel real to me.

btw, I'm in Blue Mountain/Collingwood! One of my best friends actually just started dating a guy in Markham.
 

Ryan7556

Member
Oct 27, 2017
899
Ontario, Canada
Yeah, I got what you meant! I was just reinforcing it by saying even 2 hours can be daunting, 10+ would be way too difficult for me. It's not impossible, because I've heard of (and witnessed) plenty of long-distance relationships work out. But like you, I'm way too much of a "personal intimacy" type person for it to work, or even feel real to me.

btw, I'm in Blue Mountain/Collingwood! One of my best friends actually just started dating a guy in Markham.
Well ideally, I'm hoping I can get into some sort of relationship with another trans person around my area but that's not exactly the easiest thing for me.
 

Zyrokai

Member
Nov 1, 2017
1,202
So I watched my second ever LGBT movie last night (in over 10 years): God's Own Country. And while it was basically BrokeBack Mountain: British Version (which is the other LGBT movie I've seen), I truly loved it. In fact, I can't stop thinking about it.

I want to fall in love. Tired of being alone. Haven't had a real relationship in over 10 years (also) and I'm turning 32 and just don't know what to do with myself. Why did this movie hit me so hard? :(
 

Leo

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,858
So I watched my second ever LGBT movie last night (in over 10 years): God's Own Country. And while it was basically BrokeBack Mountain: British Version (which is the other LGBT movie I've seen), I truly loved it. In fact, I can't stop thinking about it.

I want to fall in love. Tired of being alone. Haven't had a real relationship in over 10 years (also) and I'm turning 32 and just don't know what to do with myself. Why did this movie hit me so hard? :(
Spoiler alert: real relationships and romance aren't like those on the movies. Don't do this to yourself.
 

pixelation

Member
Oct 26, 2017
2,782
When I have sex with someone I really dislike the after sex smell. It's funky but not in a good way, I get super grossed out whenever I pull out my dick and the rubber looks a bit tainted *barfs*
 

Zyrokai

Member
Nov 1, 2017
1,202
Are there any other places to try and meet someone other than Tinder and gay bars? Like legitimately meet someone? What's everyone's best strategy here? Lol. Sorry for the double post.....just trying to get a new conversation started. I'm back and want to participate more! :P
 

Manipular

Member
Oct 27, 2017
503
Detroit, MI
Are there any other places to try and meet someone other than Tinder and gay bars? Like legitimately meet someone? What's everyone's best strategy here? Lol. Sorry for the double post.....just trying to get a new conversation started. I'm back and want to participate more! :P
This depends on where you live and the kinds of places/activities available to you. There are tons of LGBT people at my college and even outside of that, there are also LGBT-focused sporting teams, support groups, movie/game nights, etc. It just depends.

I don't drink, so I only go out to bars sparingly, and the assorted apps (Grindr, Tinder, etc) are VERY hit-or-miss, as you probably know (although I've been having a good time on Scruff for the past 2 years), but trying to get an activity together yourself never hurts, either, if you're able.
 

Zyrokai

Member
Nov 1, 2017
1,202
This depends on where you live and the kinds of places/activities available to you. There are tons of LGBT people at my college and even outside of that, there are also LGBT-focused sporting teams, support groups, movie/game nights, etc. It just depends.

I don't drink, so I only go out to bars sparingly, and the assorted apps (Grindr, Tinder, etc) are VERY hit-or-miss, as you probably know (although I've been having a good time on Scruff for the past 2 years), but trying to get an activity together yourself never hurts, either, if you're able.
Yeah, actually I live in a city with a vibrant LGBT community and I still struggle . Although, I definitely think I'm going to seek out activities that aren't bars. That's a good idea. There's a dedicated organization here (Stonewall Columbus) for just that and I haven't been utilizing them at all.
 
Oct 27, 2017
394
Hey guys, had a date with a nice guy two days ago, just wanted your opinion on the matter.

So we met at a friend’s party like a few months ago. We exchanged phone numbers + Facebook, but almost never talked. Eventually we just lost touch and only recently did he follow me on IG and started liking a few pics (which I reciprocated and then talked to him). He asked me out but I was way too busy, but I did keep talking with him once in a while and I assured him I’d ask him out once I was free from my busy week from work. He eventually asked me out again, and I couldn’t and then he sort of stopped talking for a while (even though I did send him messeges during my hell week).

I eventually got free and asked him out a few days ago, on Halloween. We went out for some drinks and it was a pretty okay date. It wasn’t the best date I’ve been in, but I’d definitely go for another one. Anyway we kissed by the end of the date and he suggested I go over to his place some other time. I texted him the next morning and suggested to watch a film together at his place some day and he agreed (he even said we could watch it or “pretend to watch it” wink wink).

Anyway, he hasn’t really texted since. I guess I’m a big texter, so whenever I’m into someone, I “expect” a flow of texts (and it usually is the case). However, he’s doesn’t seem like someone that texts much, but I don’t really know him. So, what do you guys think? Think he’ll eventually ask me out again? I don’t really feel like texting him/asking him out bc it feels like I’m often the one texting him.
 

Ryan7556

Member
Oct 27, 2017
899
Ontario, Canada
Something I wanted to bring up: I'm part of an 18+ LGTBQ inclusive discord, one that is focused on NSFW/Kink discussions and content. So I'm curious if anyone here is interested in an invite to it. Those that are can PM me to get a link, those that have no interest don't need to respond at all.
 

Tunichtgut

Member
Oct 27, 2017
893
Germany
Ryan7556
I'm kinda interested :D

@All
How are you guys doing?

I kinda got into a relationship after like over 10 years or something. At first it was a bit difficult to get rid of Grindr and Co., not cause i needed it, but after so many years you get so used to it, and everytime i was bored, i would just scroll on it, chat with guys etc., so it was more of a addiction, but now i'm really enjoying not having to use those Apps anymore... so time-consuming, and mostly nothing comes out of it. Someone else experienced a relief to not be on those Apps anymore?
 

Nigthwizard

The Fallen
Oct 27, 2017
229
Costa Rica
Tunichtgut I did not use grindr, but I used tinder. I wasted so much time in that app, yes "browsing" guys was fun and all, but it caused me so much anxiety and self steem issues I'm so glad I found my bf (with a different app). I never want to install it again
 

Thequietone

Member
Oct 26, 2017
1,197
ALL THE HEARTS <3! This is so sweet and I think sometimes its nice to be reminded that some view us in a light we don't see ourselves in.

Client or not, take them hearts(and him) and run.
Hi, Gibbs. Long time no see. Wish I could take him but I'm living with family for the mean time and I'm still in closet with them and I know they wouldn't be very accepting.
 

Tunichtgut

Member
Oct 27, 2017
893
Germany
Tunichtgut I did not use grindr, but I used tinder. I wasted so much time in that app, yes "browsing" guys was fun and all, but it caused me so much anxiety and self steem issues I'm so glad I found my bf (with a different app). I never want to install it again
I used Grindr, Tinder and Planetromeo (it's popular in Europe), and i'm so glad i'm not on it anymore, for the reasons you mentioned.
 

TRUE ORDER

Member
Oct 30, 2017
2,643
Hey guys, had a date with a nice guy two days ago, just wanted your opinion on the matter.

So we met at a friend’s party like a few months ago. We exchanged phone numbers + Facebook, but almost never talked. Eventually we just lost touch and only recently did he follow me on IG and started liking a few pics (which I reciprocated and then talked to him). He asked me out but I was way too busy, but I did keep talking with him once in a while and I assured him I’d ask him out once I was free from my busy week from work. He eventually asked me out again, and I couldn’t and then he sort of stopped talking for a while (even though I did send him messeges during my hell week).

I eventually got free and asked him out a few days ago, on Halloween. We went out for some drinks and it was a pretty okay date. It wasn’t the best date I’ve been in, but I’d definitely go for another one. Anyway we kissed by the end of the date and he suggested I go over to his place some other time. I texted him the next morning and suggested to watch a film together at his place some day and he agreed (he even said we could watch it or “pretend to watch it” wink wink).

Anyway, he hasn’t really texted since. I guess I’m a big texter, so whenever I’m into someone, I “expect” a flow of texts (and it usually is the case). However, he’s doesn’t seem like someone that texts much, but I don’t really know him. So, what do you guys think? Think he’ll eventually ask me out again? I don’t really feel like texting him/asking him out bc it feels like I’m often the one texting him.
Try to see if he sends you a message after a couple of days, I know that he should show more interest too but don't give it much thought or you'll go nuts.

Keep talking and if he doesn't bring up the topic or ask you to meet again, THEN I would take distance.
 
Oct 27, 2017
394
Try to see if he sends you a message after a couple of days, I know that he should show more interest too but don't give it much thought or you'll go nuts.

Keep talking and if he doesn't bring up the topic or ask you to meet again, THEN I would take distance.
Thanks for this! He actually texted me yesterday after a few days of me no texting. We'll see how this goes.
 

Djkhaled

Member
Oct 28, 2017
469
Just spent fucking hours being harassed on reddit by transphobic people. Once my egg cracked my dysphoria really has hit an all time high. I just want to run away, disconnect from the internet, start hormones and start fresh.


I wish I was just born a fucking woman, I hate this shit, I want to die. I feel like crying the horrible shit people were saying to me on reddit, I know its just the internet and its strangers but it still fucking hurts. I'll never look passable, ill always look like a gross male and I just hate myself. I want to just fucking die.

The comments are deleted now and this site didnt get all of them, especially the PM's telling me im mentally ill and to mutilate my genitals..... but anyway http://removeddit.com/r/hiphopheads/comments/dsjkev/ti_brings_his_18yearold_daughter_to_doctor_every/f6qs15v/
 

Marsy

Member
Dec 4, 2018
109
Just spent fucking hours being harassed on reddit by transphobic people. Once my egg cracked my dysphoria really has hit an all time high. I just want to run away, disconnect from the internet, start hormones and start fresh.


I wish I was just born a fucking woman, I hate this shit, I want to die. I feel like crying the horrible shit people were saying to me on reddit, I know its just the internet and its strangers but it still fucking hurts. I'll never look passable, ill always look like a gross male and I just hate myself. I want to just fucking die.

The comments are deleted now and this site didnt get all of them, especially the PM's telling me im mentally ill and to mutilate my genitals..... but anyway http://removeddit.com/r/hiphopheads/comments/dsjkev/ti_brings_his_18yearold_daughter_to_doctor_every/f6qs15v/
I understand and agree you need to disconnect. Hate has always existed just with today's technology it's easier to find . Understand that you are strong and it takes courage to be your true self. Understand that this is a journey. The woman you are today won't be the woman you are tomorrow. Ultimately, it is up to you to love that woman every step of the way. It's going to be hard but you're not alone and there are women like yourself today who have survived, persevered, and can guide you.

I'm in California. I do have some resources that can help. Just let me know.
 

Tanooki

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,063
Canada
Has anyone here ever been to an underwear party/thoughts?
Never been to one at someone’s house, but I’ve been to some club nights that had an underwear theme. They are always a ton of fun! Mostly because I like to show off my body, and dance/grind with as little fabric resistance as possible. They have also all had “dark rooms” for people that want to get handsy, so I only have to deal with that when I actually want to.

What kind of underwear party were you invited to?
 

metalslimer

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
4,708
Never been to one at someone’s house, but I’ve been to some club nights that had an underwear theme. They are always a ton of fun! Mostly because I like to show off my body, and dance/grind with as little fabric resistance as possible. They have also all had “dark rooms” for people that want to get handsy, so I only have to deal with that when I actually want to.

What kind of underwear party were you invited to?
This was just one at a club someone is going to
 

lenovox1

Member
Oct 26, 2017
3,811
Underwear Nights are usually on the traditional slow nights at many gay bars or clubs, and they're tremendous traffic drivers.
 

zoodoo

Member
Oct 26, 2017
3,537
Montreal
This thread is severely lacking chasers. Disapointed :(

A underwear party with fat guys is a dream come true for me. Where are those happening?
 

lenovox1

Member
Oct 26, 2017
3,811
This thread is severely lacking chasers. Disapointed :(

A underwear party with fat guys is a dream come true for me. Where are those happening?
Anywhere where there is a sizeable bear community. I think two Las Vegas gay bars, Charlie's and Flex Lounge, have underwear parties specifically aimed at bears.