He's Buddhist, right? Does he enjoy rock climbing for the thrills? Does he like skinny & diplomatic intellectuals with minimal pragmatic intelligence (or aptitude for 'doing stuff')? If yes then I can make it work.
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He's Buddhist, right? Does he enjoy rock climbing for the thrills? Does he like skinny & diplomatic intellectuals with minimal pragmatic intelligence (or aptitude for 'doing stuff')? If yes then I can make it work.
Close enough. But yeah personality is also a requirement.
I guess I'm just trying to codify a 'type'. Like how many pragmatic men of action are there that I would be also able to relate to as, uh, not that.
Just today I learned about TERF's, Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminists... I just can't really believe a group like this exist wtf?
Hey there! Bi guy here, pretty new to the whole thing too so can relate.
I've only dabbled very briefly in online dating but I can say with absolute certainty I definitely wouldn't want to hide that I'm bi myself, if that bothers possible candidates they aren't people I'd want to hook up with anyway if I'm being honest. Though I also have so little dating experience, online or otherwise, it's pretty laughable so take that as you will haha.
Oh and feel free to drop a PM if you reckon having a chat with a fellow confused bisexual would help or what have you, all ears!
Rofl the world sure is fucked up eh
Forgot about the update while I was loading up ERA and thought I'd entered the wrong website at first lmao. WHY IS EVERYTHING SO BRIGHT?! It's probably because I just woke up, but still.
Yeah, it's an adjustment for sure. I'm not totally into it yet. Everything is so busy and cluttered and it's like a weird lite yet heavy version of Discord and I'm not sure I'm gonna ever enjoy it.
Hahahahaha that's such a great way to put it, I knew it felt oddly familiar somehow but couldn't put my finger on why exactly.
Hello! Thank you for your response. From what I have been told or read about, dating is a numbers game, online dating more so. So it would be seemingly beneficial to cast the widest net possible. I suppose my worry again is that by pre-labeling myself as Bi, that's going to reduce the pool of numbers. That said, I do agree with you that it wouldn't be a good thing to be dishonest.
I guess it's the thing about online dating where you pick your preferences and are able to use that to find your potential matches. Where as, from what I've heard/read, in real-life dating or real-life meetings at bars/clubs/etc., you do not necessarily open up with "Hi, I'm Bi!" kind of thing. Granted that's something that one would imagine will likely get brought up, but I suppose I wonder if it's better for it to be brought up organically through conversation as opposed to being plastered on a profile.
Ah, apologies if I'm rambling. Again with little to no experience in these matters (including dating) there's not much for me to reference aside from what I've heard or read secondhand. It's probably also me worrying about what I've read about Bi people being looked down upon by Straight and Gay people for various reasons which just make me shake my head.
I'm glad my poor description made sense. I should become a writer.
Okay so some of you might remember my rambling about this short-lived, cross continent long distance relationship I found myself in early this year. I didn't think I'd be up for it again anytime soon but turns out I ended up giving a LDR another go after all, a gal this time around for a change lol. I'm so freaking glad I did though, she's lovely and we have crazy good chemistry, almost feels too good to be true. Can't wait to see where this goes, I like to think I've matured enough to handle it better overall and also not to let my world end if it somehow falls apart this time too so hey, why not! So happy right now, really needed that in my life to be honest and btw you're all beautiful people and I love y'all :))) <3 <3
Haha fair enough, at the end of the day I'm only taking a lot of stabs in the dark myself as well. Good point though, I guess if you're confident you can work it into your convos it'd be fine too. I just wouldn't want to risk dealing with "Haha yea btw I'm bi (delivered 52 hours ago)" so I'd still go with waving it into my bio anyway. May as well cut the crap. Plus, it truly is a significant part of my identity, at least as of now.
Hey if it comes out anywhere close to as fun to read as that supposedly poor description did I'll be the first in line!
If I've driven anyone away from the Discord, I apologize. I know that I'm an absolutely horrible person.
Ohh a wild Ratsky <3
I do tend to love the southern WV accent admittedly. I live in the eastern panhandle and I get told all the time by people on the West Coast and South of my accent and I just look at them puzzled haha. You search the eastern seaboard and let me know what you find, perhaps theres hope in NC after all! Country guys are hot.
Dire... exactly what WV is. I think WV could be even worst that dire at this point.
Grizzly!! You look incredible my friend! I am so proud of you! I've seen your pictures on Instagram and gosh, you amaze me. So inspirational!
I do tend to love the southern WV accent admittedly. I live in the eastern panhandle and I get told all the time by people on the West Coast and South of my accent and I just look at them puzzled haha. You search the eastern seaboard and let me know what you find, perhaps theres hope in NC after all! Country guys are hot.
Dire... exactly what WV is. I think WV could be even worst that dire at this point.
Grizzly!! You look incredible my friend! I am so proud of you! I've seen your pictures on Instagram and gosh, you amaze me. So inspirational!
I totally get you there. I suppose I'm trying best to figure out like many how to wade the waters where being identified as "Bi" comes with a lot of predetermined baggage by many. Particularly the bothersome preconceptions that Bi people are either super promiscuous (which is the furthest thing from the truth in my case), or would cheat on their partner at the drop of a hat if in a committed relationship (likewise as far from the truth). I suppose there is nothing that can be done about that stuff though, and it probably is not healthy to hide being Bi while in a relationship of any kind. So I can definitely see why getting it out of the way as soon as possible would seem to be the preferred choice to avoid those kinds of things.
After a few weeks of talking to a guy and a few planned dates (that he no showed to) he removed me and stopped texting me. Seems to be a reccuring trend in my city.
I'd say at this point it's me, but it never gets to the point where there's an opportunity to get to know me so I know it's not. Men in Ottawa are trash I guess 🤷♂️.
I'd say at this point it's me, but it never gets to the point where there's an opportunity to get to know me so I know it's not. Men in Ottawa are trash I guess 🤷♂️.
It's not terribly uncommon here in Orlando either. Ghosting is just part of the dating culture around here.
I hate it, but it's not like I can tell them that afterward, so...
What are some tell tale signs someone is into you vs just wanting to be friends?
At first I thought messaging a lot and continuous hanging out would be indications of interest - but their profile says dates and friends, not relationship.
Also they haven't particularly reacted strongly to flirty messages. (Not negatively either).
At first I thought messaging a lot and continuous hanging out would be indications of interest - but their profile says dates and friends, not relationship.
Also they haven't particularly reacted strongly to flirty messages. (Not negatively either).
I suppose.
Long and embarrassing story time:
Several years ago, I had originally thought that I was bisexual, but after dating a few girls and struggling pretty badly with intimacy, I eventually realized that any "desire" I felt for women was really just a mixture of admiration and envy, not actual attraction. On the side, while I do find men attractive, the thought of actually being with one sexually (or romantically for that matter) does nothing for me. While I don't find the idea of another man topping me or giving him oral off-putting (at least compared to doing anything with my own dick which is a massive turnoff for me) I do not find it arousing at all either. Same thing with the non-sexual aspects of relationships. I simply cannot picture myself dating, marrying, or raising a family with another man, at least not as myself. Nor do i have any interest in dating women.
However, all of that flips in an instant if I instead imagine myself as being a woman in a heterosexual relationship with a man. These fantasy scenarios where I am a woman are the only times I ever really feel I even have a sexuality. And it's been that way for as long as I can honestly remember. Imagining myself as a woman in sexual scenarios is the only way I have ever been able to get off. Back in middle school I first stumbled upon gender transformation fiction (some erotic, some slice of life stuff) and I've been obsessed with it ever since. I remember reading this manga in high school and it was like the ultimate fantasy wish fulfillment scenario for me. But in the end its all just fantasy, in reality I really, really hate my body and I always have, and it just completely ruins the thought of any kind of intimacy. At this point I think the only relationship I would even want would be with an asexual person who is just seeking romantic and emotional companionship.
I haven't bothered with dating in over two years now and I'm not sure if I ever will again. Ultimately I don't know if I'm just a gay person struggling with internalized homophobia, or if I just have a bizarre fetish and severe body image issues. Or all three.
I have considered that in the past and I think I may be on some level (in the sense that I have gender dysphoria over my body). If I was 10 years younger and had the same awareness that I do now I think transition is something I would seriously entertain, but I feel its way too late now. And even if I could pull it off, I'd just feel like I was deceiving people and would still never be comfortable with myself. I don't view myself or identify as the opposite sex like trans people do, rather I just see myself as a man who wishes he was a woman.
Well I don't think its ever too late and dont think your story is weird or anything. I'd encourage you to maybe talk to some transgender people about what you are going through.
Now that he's found his pride, I need him to find my prostate.
That quote is fucking biblic ffs. Took my boi to NYC. We had too much fun... So tired 😭
lord have mercy. Smash released, obviously, and I've been playing that almost religiously. I joined a local Discord group for it and one of my old Gamestop customers is a member. This guy has flirted with me in the past and I'm not sure how to tell him I'm not interested at this point aside from just being obviously mean. This group held a tournament and I mentioned being not super comfortable in large groups and that it may take some time for me to be willing to meet up and then I get a DM from said customer:
"But in the past you've worked at such locations as Blockbuster and GameStop!"
Okay, first: working retail doesn't magically make me not have anxiety. Quite the opposite, in fact. And second? I've never once fucking mentioned I've worked at Blockbuster to him so I don't know how in the hell he knows but I'm creeped out hardcore. Then he somehow found me on instagram and liked like a slew of my photos and... idk. I'm just sketched out.
....watch him be a member of ERA and see this post or something.
"But in the past you've worked at such locations as Blockbuster and GameStop!"
Okay, first: working retail doesn't magically make me not have anxiety. Quite the opposite, in fact. And second? I've never once fucking mentioned I've worked at Blockbuster to him so I don't know how in the hell he knows but I'm creeped out hardcore. Then he somehow found me on instagram and liked like a slew of my photos and... idk. I'm just sketched out.
....watch him be a member of ERA and see this post or something.
Most of AC's underwear will prop your junk, but the trophy boy stuff can be obscene.
...i own several.
Hey everyone new to ERA (well posting on it that is) and I saw this today so I thought I would post something that's been bugging me.
I'm currently on a study abroad program in Italy for the school year and am going to finish college next year with the plans to go straight to a masters so I can get into the field I really want since my school doesn't offer exactly what I want. Long story short for the next 3 years or so I won't be in one place for more than a year. But of course I would like to have a romantic life. I'm pretty traditional I think you would call it? I don't really like dating around, mainly I am attracted to the idea of long term relationships, and can barely get myself to think about casual hook ups (at the very least I need to have a conversation with the person). I have no problem with other people doing them but I myself am hesitant.
Anyway given my situation I downloaded grindr out of curiosity and only kept it for a week, during which not one person answered in more than two word replies and I was texted by a couple creeps. Just wanted to know if this is just how Italian grindr is or is this how everyone is? Also how hopeless is my romantic life for the next 3 years?
I'm currently on a study abroad program in Italy for the school year and am going to finish college next year with the plans to go straight to a masters so I can get into the field I really want since my school doesn't offer exactly what I want. Long story short for the next 3 years or so I won't be in one place for more than a year. But of course I would like to have a romantic life. I'm pretty traditional I think you would call it? I don't really like dating around, mainly I am attracted to the idea of long term relationships, and can barely get myself to think about casual hook ups (at the very least I need to have a conversation with the person). I have no problem with other people doing them but I myself am hesitant.
Anyway given my situation I downloaded grindr out of curiosity and only kept it for a week, during which not one person answered in more than two word replies and I was texted by a couple creeps. Just wanted to know if this is just how Italian grindr is or is this how everyone is? Also how hopeless is my romantic life for the next 3 years?
That's just how Grindr is in general.
Be careful with how you use the app. There's always the (very small) possibility that you'll meet someone worthwhile, but it's more than likely to end up heartbroken at best.
If you don't -have- to date right now, then don't do it. And if you feel like you want to have formative experience, then go in with the right mentality, use protection and guard your heart.
Nothing in life is ever permanent. So make your experiences worthwhile.
Yeah I was kinda expecting that. Oh well I suppose I'll just date myself for the time being
Yeah, Grindr has its uses (even if you're not using it to hook up) but it's super demoralizing after a while. I used to try to engage with conversation but after a while the 1-2 word responses dragged me down and now that all I will respond with now, too. Why waste the energy to make conversation when the chances of them doing the same are super low?
It sounds shitty, and it is, but it's just how it is, sadly.
Also, if you feel like you're being driven by an emotional, hormonal response to do something you're not fully onboard with, bust a nut.
Suddenly that hot guy won't seem so hot, and you'll have a clearer head to make better decisions.
That's what my homeboy Diego Sans is for. He doesn't judge.
But yeah, I've been realizing more and more that basing personal value on other's perceptions and actions is just a recipe for disappointment. Probably should have learned that earlier but sheltered childhood and all that
This advice should be the first line in the gay bible because it's the truest thing.
Welcome to grindr.
Finding sex is easy. But finding sex with someone decent? Slim chance...
wrong app. I feel like grindr in europe is only good if you want to lose some organs. try PlanetRomeo.
I just bought 7g of a sativa for like $53 CDN (the weed and price both a solid 'ok') from a cute 'budtender'(?) in a well lit and professional setting, and paid for it with my credit card. The gay weeds have finally been legalized. The next step is socializing the gay weeds so that we can later have a gay weed communist revolution.
Tl;dr: I bought weed legally for the first time and it was fun.
Tl;dr: I bought weed legally for the first time and it was fun.
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You'd think so, but once weed is gentrified, capitalism will grasp it in its cold, uncaring fingers and soon enough you'll see white suburban moms doing weed specifically targeted towards them.
Then the prices will skyrocket. Gucci Weed.
I disagree! The craft beer (and spirits) market is thriving thanks to hipsters and gourmands. Weed can potentially be both simple enough in its production, and varied (by strain, or by alkaloid content, or taste/terpene profile, etc) that the market will surely have a vitality to it.Artisans will get their hands on it, as they should. Also a lot of industrialization means that the range of products will be incredible. I for one would definitely like to drink a cannabis infused soda at least once.
I actually bought a lot of weed through the grey market before and in most ways it was better than the current rollout in Canada, but there's something superior about it being legalized and totally out in the open in a downtown street corner at 2:00 in the afternoon, if you want it to be.
My post was meant in good humour too ;p
My fun with this is, well, I wouldn't say that I'm a little manic today, 'ebullient' if anything.
Edit: Also I am high and writing an involved OP about Western theology, because my view is that if you hew more on the philosophy side of the philosophy-theology connection, theology is a trip. The abstract and essentialized theory or notion of what God either is or could be or must 'rationally' be, can entertain the mind in a strange way, even if you care not one bit whether God can be said to exist in any meaningful sense or not. Spiritual metaphysics is an 'aesthetic' discipline imo, just in the case of western phil it's the beauty of a theoretical object, 'The All'.
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um excuse you
the only way the revolution will be complete is if we can take the gay weed and go to space
installed grindr last night to see the christmas selection.
set up a normal mugshot of me as a profile picture. profile doesn't ask for sex or anything. i actually put asexual in there.
welp.
people really want the white christmas. RIP thirsty gay dudes here.
set up a normal mugshot of me as a profile picture. profile doesn't ask for sex or anything. i actually put asexual in there.
welp.
people really want the white christmas. RIP thirsty gay dudes here.
my experience is that guys don't give a shit as to what you say you're looking for... which is obnoxious sometimes. I very clearly state that I won't talk to blank profiles/ones without pictures and yet I get messages all the time "hey."
and while I don't look for sex I got a very polite "may I see your cock please" message the other night hahaha