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ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
- Thread starter Hollywood Duo
- Start date
My daughter is only 8 months old, but she happily tries most every small bite we give her from our plates... except beignets.
she spit out a Cafe Dummond beignet with powdered sugar. 😩
I know everyone says she looks just like me, but I'm beginning to wonder if she's my child... 🤔
she spit out a Cafe Dummond beignet with powdered sugar. 😩
I know everyone says she looks just like me, but I'm beginning to wonder if she's my child... 🤔
I guess we've been lucky. Our 21 month old has never refused anything except raw water chestnuts except for when she's sick. It's to the point where we try random things just to see what she won't eat.
Daaaaaaammnn you're lucky. Eating is just our bane, even though people already say our kid eats well.
Ours aren't terribly picky but if they are having one of their days where they want nothing to do with something they've loved before we chalk it up to crankiness/teething/sick and move on. If they don't want to eat at that moment then so be it. A missed meal isn't a big deal at one year old so long as they are eating other meals or packing it in other days.
We're trending in the direction that they eat what we are cooking for ourselves and there's only been a couple no gos.
We're trending in the direction that they eat what we are cooking for ourselves and there's only been a couple no gos.
Just a rant because I need to right now: My god the sheer amount of patience needed for this stage of baby/toddler is astounding sometimes. Our 17 month old is getting in 3 teeth plus had a bit of a fever so he's sleeping like trash and a half the last week or so. Wife and I are on like 4 hours of broken sleep each night.
He's not using words yet obviously so everything is just this long whining sound and when you're on 4 hours of sleep the whining is so grating after being with him for the day. He whines louder and louder and louder until you identify whatever object he has or is pointing to. It's so cute and I know he's gathering lots of words, but *whiiiiiiine* "Fire truck" *whiiiiiiiine* "fire truck" *whiiiiiiiiiiine* "police car" *whiiiiiiiiiiiiine* "still a fire truck" gets so old lmao.
Playing is also hard now too. He's got some ideas of what he wants done or wants to do but no real way to communicate it or sometimes he literally can't. So lots of whining.
Anyway, enough of the rant. He's still so cute developing a personality. He's starting to love animal figures and pretend play with them.
We had a bit of a meeting with the birth to three people around here because he's still not saying like any words at all, including mama or dada. They weren't too concerned but we'll check back in a few months.
We also took him on a big trip a few weeks ago and I couldn't be prouder/happier with how he took the new environment and the plane ride and everything. He met his out of state grandparents for the first time and was so happy also to get out of the house and play outside again in a warmer state.
That's another hard thing now. He looooooooves outdoors but we live in Wisconsin so it's utter shit now. Hard staying cooped up so much. He hates winter gear and dislikes the snow so we just don't really go out unless we need to.
He's not using words yet obviously so everything is just this long whining sound and when you're on 4 hours of sleep the whining is so grating after being with him for the day. He whines louder and louder and louder until you identify whatever object he has or is pointing to. It's so cute and I know he's gathering lots of words, but *whiiiiiiine* "Fire truck" *whiiiiiiiine* "fire truck" *whiiiiiiiiiiine* "police car" *whiiiiiiiiiiiiine* "still a fire truck" gets so old lmao.
Playing is also hard now too. He's got some ideas of what he wants done or wants to do but no real way to communicate it or sometimes he literally can't. So lots of whining.
Anyway, enough of the rant. He's still so cute developing a personality. He's starting to love animal figures and pretend play with them.
We had a bit of a meeting with the birth to three people around here because he's still not saying like any words at all, including mama or dada. They weren't too concerned but we'll check back in a few months.
We also took him on a big trip a few weeks ago and I couldn't be prouder/happier with how he took the new environment and the plane ride and everything. He met his out of state grandparents for the first time and was so happy also to get out of the house and play outside again in a warmer state.
That's another hard thing now. He looooooooves outdoors but we live in Wisconsin so it's utter shit now. Hard staying cooped up so much. He hates winter gear and dislikes the snow so we just don't really go out unless we need to.
I feel you, we're coming off a new tooth then back to back ear infections with the girl and boy, they had their MMR shots so two days before the ear infection both ran high fevers around 103, and now they are so stuffed up with a cold and they can't sleep. We just went 7 days straight without sleeping more than 2-3 hours at a time and the sheer volume of the crying, it's not like you can take turns, both parents are awake. They were napping terribly as well so getting a cat nap in during the day was off the table.
I almost broke down two nights ago, I was at my wits end. We finally got a night of sleep last night after the doctor advised some Benadryl once we verified the ear infections were cleared up.
What's that like? Lmao. We haven't had a night's sleep since he was born. We probably average 5 to maybe 5 and a half hours each night. You do kinda get used to it after a while.
I will just say - my just over two year old is now REALLY defiant about everything. Unless it's her idea, or you let her do exactly what she wants to do, when she wants to do it, there's crying or whining. It's become a game of - let's trick her into thinking it was her idea to do whatever it is we're trying to do, but make sure she doesn't decide what she wants to do is run out into traffic. It's exhausting, in a very different way than those early days of not sleeping much.
Every little age change is a new challenge. I guess this is parenthood...
Every little age change is a new challenge. I guess this is parenthood...
My 7 month old has decided he's sleeping on his side and that's it now. We obviously put him down on his back but he gets himself onto his side and often onto his front in fairly short order. Makes me a bit nervous, any thoughts on that? I think the SIDS risk has gone down a fair bit at this point but should we leave him to it?
Thats fine. You're doing the right thing.
Your job is to put them down on their back. If they roll over, it was their choosing (and they have the ability to roll back if they want). The important thing is that you didn't put them on their side or stomach.
At least that's how my nurse practitioner sister explained it to me.
My 8 month old daughter started doing the same thing at 6 months old.
The second you place her in the crib she rolls to her left.
Yeah general advice is to put them on their back and if they roll then they roll. Make sure you don't have anything else in the crib that they can roll into or have their face buried in, obviously. It should just be the mattress and that's it.
There's a lot of negotiating, yeah. My kid had a very defiant phase that lasted a few weeks, then fortunately petered down into a normal amount of defiance lol. He used to have a thing where instead of saying no, he'd go NO NO NO NO NO. Always five times. He seems more amiable these days, though he still clearly stalls when presented with stuff he doesn't want to do.
I find that giving him a bit more choice in his life makes him happier in general. So we come up with choices where both outcomes lead to what we want out of him anyway, like in a linear RPG lol. When it's time to change his clothes, we'd sometimes ask him "do you want the blue shirt or the white shirt today?" and then he'll happily choose whatever he wants. Then he's more willing to go along with the change because he had some say in it.
I think SIDS risk has gone down a good bit by then, but can he roll back once he's on his front? The main danger is him rolling into a position that is smothering him and him not being able to get out of it himself.
So as long as there is nothing in his bed that he can form a tight seal over both his mouth and nose, he should probably be fine. That's why people recommend not having anything in the crib with the kid until they can roll.
My kid did the same thing with rolling on his front and sleeping that way once he was able to. Maybe belly sleeping is just more comfortable for them at that age.
Hi, guys! I'm so glad that era has a parent's thread after searching around because I really need advice.
Here's the thing, a tooth of my daughter's (6 years old) is loose. So we visited a pedia dentist to have it checked and see if we can have it removed. After the initial checkup, the dentist told us that since our daughter doesn't have gaps between her teeth, she risks having crooked teeth. He then advised us to remove 8 of her teeth (4 upper and 4 lower), in preparation for her permanent teeth and also to save my daughter more trips to the dentist for every loose teeth.
I'm not knowledgeable with regards to children's teeth and reading stuff online hasn't really stopped my doubts so I figured I would check with you guys. Should I go ahead with the dentist's advice? Or should I just wait for the tooth to fall out or pull it out myself?
I need help, guys. Thank you.
Edit: Forgot to mention, my daughter don't have cavities by the way. In case someone will ask. :)
Here's the thing, a tooth of my daughter's (6 years old) is loose. So we visited a pedia dentist to have it checked and see if we can have it removed. After the initial checkup, the dentist told us that since our daughter doesn't have gaps between her teeth, she risks having crooked teeth. He then advised us to remove 8 of her teeth (4 upper and 4 lower), in preparation for her permanent teeth and also to save my daughter more trips to the dentist for every loose teeth.
I'm not knowledgeable with regards to children's teeth and reading stuff online hasn't really stopped my doubts so I figured I would check with you guys. Should I go ahead with the dentist's advice? Or should I just wait for the tooth to fall out or pull it out myself?
I need help, guys. Thank you.
Edit: Forgot to mention, my daughter don't have cavities by the way. In case someone will ask. :)
I mean, if you're uncomfortable, you might consider getting a second opinion from another dentist. That sounds sort of extreme to pull out so many teeth at once, but if it saved on braces later, that wouldn't be bad. This dentist might just be trying to milk you for cash since 8 teeth pulled is going to cost you a small fortune.
My son is 6 and has lost two teeth so far. One I pulled out and he actually pulled out the second on his own. If it was me, I would 100% get a second opinion before forcing my kid to go through having that many teeth pulled. Which teeth do they want to yank? Like two front and two molars may not be 'that' bad, I guess, but your kid would be toothless in those spots for quite awhile.
I am not a dentist.
Remove EIGHT teeth!? I don't know much about teeth either, but I'd see another dentist to at least get a second opinion. That sounds nuts.
He advised to pull out the 4 upper front and 4 lower front teeth.
Yeah, pulling out eight teeth right away sounds pretty extreme to me. He told me it was to make room for the permanent teeth, since my daughter's teeth doesn't have gaps in between, to minimize the chances of getting crooked teeth and also to save trips to the dentist.
We'll be getting a second opinion. Thanks, guys.
Hopefully, someone else can also chime in with their experience and offer more good advice. Thanks. :)
Well, at least the 8 front teeth are the first to come in, but she'd barely be able to bite anything for a year. Sounds pretty rough. If you get a second opinion, I'd love to hear what they say. You could even ask your dentist if you trust them (assuming you and the kiddos go to separate dentists).
I mean, they're all growing in one way or the other and they'll still have a lack of space... I dunno. Just feels weird to me.
I'm not a dentist but this seems very unusual, especially for something that sounds cosmetic and is routinely corrected in other ways.
I'd seek a second opinion on that. Pulling 8 teeth out of your kids mouth becaause their adult teeth might be crooked... seems wild to me. Also, anecdotally, I've never seen a 6 year old walking around with no front teeth on the top and bottom before.
Let us know what the other dentist(s) say... Im interested if this is some new oral trend or something
8 teeth at once?
No.
I've heard of removing baby teeth to make room for permanent teeth, but it's only when the pattern of baby teeth loss is not in the normal order, or if the baby teeth aren't coming out on their own and are behind schedule.
But at the most I've heard pulled out at once were 4, the central incisors on the top and bottom.
I'd speak with an orthodontist before I went to another dentist.
It may not be cosmetic, these things can affect jaw alignment, etc. As indicated, second opinion, orthodontist, etc.
We actually had a sort of similar problem with our eldest. She's 15 and some of her adult teeth still hadn't come in for a variety of reasons related to her inheriting my small mouth, etc., and it was delaying our ability to have braces to correct alignment issues. Our orthodontist has been very patient though, and finally things are getting there but it was a lot of "still not in?" from my wife and I for a couple years there.
Well, if you ask me about my daughters teeth, I think she has good teeth as compared to most of her classmates and playmates. No cavities or rotten teeth, etc. That's why I'm kinda questioning why she has to have 8 teeth pulled out since only 1 tooth is loose.
We will be having our second opinion this Friday. Hopefully, they can further enlighten us.
Or, hopefully, my daughter manages to pull out her tooth on her own and save us the trip to the dentist. We'd do it ourselves but she only wants a dentist to pull it out. LOL.
We will be having our second opinion this Friday. Hopefully, they can further enlighten us.
Or, hopefully, my daughter manages to pull out her tooth on her own and save us the trip to the dentist. We'd do it ourselves but she only wants a dentist to pull it out. LOL.
There's a lot more to come out. Best you start practicing. I just pulled on it a bit every day until my son complained it hurt and then would stop until the next day. We hyped him up on tooth fairy shit and it was enough to get him to do most of the work on his own.
My daughter (7 mo) is just having her first real fever (103f, which we were able to bring down with baby meds). Kind of fast shallow breathing, though the doc said not to worry if she is happy (and she was quite chipper before going to bed ). Bad cold, flu, RSV, not sure, but almost certainly a fucking virus. I know it's completely expected but it has been a long time since I have been this shattered. I also don't really trust the NHS, so it's one of these times where I wish I was not in the UK.
My 7 month son just caught a cold too. He had a fever for a day or so, but it has gone down to normal since yesterday. But then he had the flu and some coughing. We brought him to the hospital to have a pediatric nebulizer treatment.
He's mostly fine now, but he sometimes refuses to take the medicine, especially the antibiotics. It's either he completely rejects it or he would throw it out shortly after he swallowed it. It's the most frustrating part of all this. Thankfully, he seems cheerful as usual.
Fevers in kids are the worst, especially when they are young. I'm generally a worrier, and the worry during the overnight due to a fever kills me every time. We've had some crazy high readings for my daughter too (like 105f) so the worry is off the charts for me. You're not alone in feeling shattered by it...
Fevers are never dangerous unless it's from being out in the hot sun
It's a defense mechanism to fight the infection
They've actually shown that if you don't reduce the fevers kids recover slightly quicker. That being said if my kiddo is miserable with a fever I'm bringing it down, but I'd never wake him up to do so
It's a defense mechanism to fight the infection
They've actually shown that if you don't reduce the fevers kids recover slightly quicker. That being said if my kiddo is miserable with a fever I'm bringing it down, but I'd never wake him up to do so
I wouldn't say never. They're really fucking dangerous before your child's immune system is really built, so about 4 months.
Ours was hospitalized and they found meningitis at about 3 months. He had to stay there for 2 weeks through treatment. It was found because he had a fever that meant we take him to the ER.
That said, after that they're obviously less so. Our now 17 month old had a fever last week. Meant he slept like crap and a half, but the dude was bouncing off the fucking walls while awake happy as hell while rocking a 104+ temperature.
I removed this post because while not being bogus, I don't think the causal evidence for what I wrote is as clear as I could remember reading
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Try to feel better with the fact that high readings are very common in children. Sending good thoughts to you and your kid
I wouldn't say never. While fevers are normally a defense mechanism, they become harmful if the temperature gets too high. Too high, and you start getting very negative symptoms that need intervention. People are right to keep an eye on the fever to make sure it doesn't get out of control.
Then there are febrile seizures, which require a hospital visit every time it happens. While they may not happen directly because of the fever itself, they can be caused by the temperature shooting up fast.
They're not harmful no matter how high they get, again, if from infection. It's generated by your body to make it inhospitable for the infection.
Young kiddos can routinely go to 105, 106, and be A OK apart from feeling miserable
Febrile seizures are caused by generalized inflammation, which is usually accompanied by fevers. I've seen febrile seizures before in afebrile children, the fever just usually pops up soon after or within a few hours.
I understand that it is a defensive response to try to deal with infection. I know that.
But fevers should not be completely ignored. It's an overgeneralization to make to say that it's totally normal and safe at any temperature. I have had to call an ambulance on my kid before because of high fevers, and both the paramedics and the doctors that I saw said it was the right decision. They don't tell me to just ignore it because that's what the body does. While it's true that the numbers don't necessarily automatically mean that someone is in danger, and I get that it's a symptom and not the cause of the infection, but it's still a sign that needs to be monitored and addressed if needed.
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I never said to ignore it, just that the fever in and of itself isn't dangerous. I'm saying something very narrow and probably unhelpful, sorry about that.
It is a symptom, and you have to look at the whole picture.
Sorry, it's been a pet peeve of mine. There's a lot of misinformation about it. Parents get worried that if they don't give their child Tylenol or Motrin they're going to be harmed in some way. I get asked what is a temperature to be worried about, and it's not a question that has a good answer
It is a symptom, and you have to look at the whole picture.
Sorry, it's been a pet peeve of mine. There's a lot of misinformation about it. Parents get worried that if they don't give their child Tylenol or Motrin they're going to be harmed in some way. I get asked what is a temperature to be worried about, and it's not a question that has a good answer
Okay, I understand that. Sorry for getting worked up about this. It's just that fevers are a huge stress point for me because every infection > fever could lead to a febrile seizure for my kid, even if the term "febrile seizure" is a bit of a misnomer. It's led to a lot of grief because my kid clearly starts looking less responsive and conscious at very high temperatures, and regardless of whether it's the fever itself causing that or the underlying infection, it's still horrible to watch.
Funny that you mentioned asking about the temperature to be worried about, because that's exactly what I asked the doctor in the hospital after another febrile seizure a while back (on Christmas lol). I think he said that he's not so worried about the exact number on the thermometer, but rather he's more worried about other symptoms that may appear along with it, such as listlessness, passing out, and so on. Which I think is in line with what you said, if I'm understanding you right.
I asked the same question to the paramedics bringing us in, and they said to just call them at the temperatures I saw just to be safe, and that they don't mind because they often get called for much less.
A little update regarding my daughter and her tooth.
So, we went to another dentist yesterday to have a second opinion. Regarding her loose tooth, she just recommended wiggling the tooth regularly to loosen it up until it pops off. No need to operate to pull her tooth out. She also doesn't recommend pulling out teeth prematurely unless absolutely necessary like due to cavities, etc. This is because this may also cause teeth to be crooked due to the teeth not having any support from other teeth and also because the permanent teeth will likely still take a long time to come out. And, if the child's teeth becomes crooked, it can be easily corrected with braces after.
All in all, I kinda like this dentist more as she doesn't immediately take drastic actions like pulling teeth out unless absolutely necessary. We will be visiting her clinic next week for fluoride on my daughter's teeth.
So, we went to another dentist yesterday to have a second opinion. Regarding her loose tooth, she just recommended wiggling the tooth regularly to loosen it up until it pops off. No need to operate to pull her tooth out. She also doesn't recommend pulling out teeth prematurely unless absolutely necessary like due to cavities, etc. This is because this may also cause teeth to be crooked due to the teeth not having any support from other teeth and also because the permanent teeth will likely still take a long time to come out. And, if the child's teeth becomes crooked, it can be easily corrected with braces after.
All in all, I kinda like this dentist more as she doesn't immediately take drastic actions like pulling teeth out unless absolutely necessary. We will be visiting her clinic next week for fluoride on my daughter's teeth.
Thanks for the report-in, interesting to hear. Good job on getting a second opinion and finding a better dentist.
Now let's see a good ole fashioned flame war about fluoride treatments!
My wife is having a tough time of it at the moment with our nearly 8 month old twins. She still isn't back to work yet so basically doesn't have a minute to herself at all. If they don't sleep during the day for example it takes away her one chance to relax even briefly. I'm doing what I can but she needs a total break for a day or two which is very hard to organise. It really is hard sometimes.
It's tough for sure, and good to admit and try to address rather than keeping up appearances and having it boil over. That said there are no easy, obvious answers as I'm sure you've found. We didn't have family nearby or friends who were reliable for sitting, but we were lucky to be able to afford to defray travel costs and have my wife's parents visit for chunks of time. Do her friends know she's having a hard time of it?
Feel free to come in and vent, we're here to listen.
I've posted a few times about how our 18mos old is really behind in gross-motor. E.g., standing, walking, etc. She was standing great up till about ~10, 11mos and then stopped completely around 12 months about when she started crawling. She was late to crawl, and crawled.. "funny" basically kinda dragging one leg beneath her. She's also had some other interesting physical behavior. We've long been worried that it's something more than "low muscle tone" and "hyper mobility" which is most of what we've gotten from our doctors and other specialists (we went to a ped orthopaedist and geneticst, and those visits were both positive). She's always been really good at fine motor skills -- feeding herself, using her fingers, flipping books, playing musical instruments, playing with toys that require some precision, etc. SHe's also significantly behind on speech, really just not developing new words at the rate they'd expect.
We do an early intervention program with a speech + physical therapist, and the physical therapist today suggested that we should take our daughter to a neurologist and that she's concerned that it's more than just low muscle tone. My wife is a nervous wreck all the time with all of this, and I usually have to stay level headed, optimistic, positive, etc, but it's still frustrating for me too, I get worried but try to stay positive. So we'll see what's next.
Dunno why I'm sharing this, but it's just one of those things.
We do an early intervention program with a speech + physical therapist, and the physical therapist today suggested that we should take our daughter to a neurologist and that she's concerned that it's more than just low muscle tone. My wife is a nervous wreck all the time with all of this, and I usually have to stay level headed, optimistic, positive, etc, but it's still frustrating for me too, I get worried but try to stay positive. So we'll see what's next.
Dunno why I'm sharing this, but it's just one of those things.
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Yeah, our Pediatrician is good, he's the one whose recommended us to other specialists like the orthopedist and the genetecist.
My wife sent the message the PT sent her to our pediatrician, and he was like "Well, the orthopedist wasn't worried it was anything beyond low musce tone and I'd trust him more than this physical therapist," And he has a good point ... the PT is a young person freshly out of college/grad school, the ortho is a respected pediatric orthopedist in the state.
We're going to go to a developmental specialist at Children's hospital in Boston, but they're all booked out by about ~6mos, super high in demand hospital. There's other specialists around us too that we might go to in the meantime.
Man I can't imagine. I'd be pretty paranoid and fretting too. My own son is about 17 months old and I can't help but worry about his delayed speech even though we had a meeting and they said it's fine unless he talks more in the next few months (he doesn't even say mama or dada yet). If that were accompanied with movement issues I'd definitely be where you are.
Not much else to say but that I have sympathies and wish you all the luck in the world that it's just a delay and things will be on track in not too long.
Not much else to say but that I have sympathies and wish you all the luck in the world that it's just a delay and things will be on track in not too long.
One of the best things for my wife ws going back to work. She was going kinda batty at home all day with an infant, not reall ybeing able to do her regular routine, and it was really good for her to get back into the working cycle, get out of the house, talk to adults regularly, etc. Of course, it's all a balance as in the US we have shitty maternity laws (e.g., none) and so if she wanted to take more time she really couldn't. But even over the summer (she's a teacher and gets summers off), she'd be going a little batty after a few weeks being in the house with a 1 year old.
WIth twins I can only imagine how much harder it'd be. Are you looking into daycares/nannies/etc? Our daughter started at daycare pretty early (9 or 10 weeks), but overall I'd say it's been good for her. Of course she got that first round of daycare borne diseases when she was ~12 weeks, and then that ran through us as well, but overall, daycare has been great. There's been a handful of days here and there that we've also sent her to daycare for the day then done something like gone skiing.
Sympathies here, too. Another thing I can't imagine is twins. Hard enough having one. Relaxing even briefly, especially around 8 months is rough. I also cannot fathom that age going a day without them sleeping during the day. We're pretty hardcore on making sure our little one sleeps and always have. He's literally never missed a day's nap, though there have been a few that were cut short unfortunately.
Going back to work can help, but be aware it's also a different set of stress and problems. It's hard to change focus especially after that long. It's also hard to prioritize work. I'd be fretting so badly if we had to have daycare, too. My wife works full time and I work part time so he's always with one of us so that does give us a bit of a sigh of relief but it's still really hard to be away, especially during this time when they're developing so fucking fast.
We've been in that world. My daughter now fights going to bed for abour an hour, she used to be so good about going to sleep as soon as we laid her down. On the plus side she's conssitently slept through the night the last 2 weeks, where as she was getting up multiple times in the weeks prior. So...... two steps forwaard I guess