Yea, and all those kids who get bullied just need to quit school for a couple of weeks. Gimme a break.
Pornstar August Ames commits suicide after harassment
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Are condoms genuinely not an option for workers who are concerned about their health? Surely there must be studios prioritizing safety.
Where did she say that? It's not in the tweet you keep referencing. She was very clearly upset with having to source information she considered important to making decisions about her career and health herself rather than agents and production companies being upfront about it. Speaking out about those sorts of things is good for everyone in the industry.
This is, sadly, a common line of thinking in regards to online bullying.
almost every single one of your posts on this forum has been you feigning concern about victim blaming while you low key participate in victim blaming. your issue is clearly something along the lines of pc culture, but you're trying to disguise it. look at the threads you've particpated in and the stances you've taken in them. it paints a pretty clear picture.
I'm a hard ass progressive, pro-choice, pro LGBTQ+ rights, son of a black man and straight. I grew up in a country that being a left wing like I am is more similar to the kind of social progressivism envisioned by Bernie Sanders but even more extreme. But I feel like people here are forgetting things like personal boundaries and one important message that I saw in Fury Road not so long ago:
We are not things. Not just women. All of us. We are not things. We are people. We are people with our own dreams, desires, traits, light, personalities, flaws, boundaries, fears, limits, boundaries, souls. We are not things. We are not this message we are typying. We are not these messages on a computer screen. There are people writing and reading what is said here and all of us are a whole universe facing our own battles every, single, day. Every single hour. Every single minute. Every single second. We are not things, fam. Regardless who you are. Regardless who you are talking to. We are not things.
When people say that she shouldn't recuse herself of having sex with an actor or actresses for whatever reason she has, we are taking away her right to choose. "But she doesn't do it with bi or homosexual actors and this is homophobic because that's their jobs, it's harmful to them". WE. ARE. NOT. THINGS. We are human, fam. We are all in this fucked up world together and we are all capable of the most incredible and beautiful acts, but also the most vile and horrifying ones. I want to propose here an exercise of empathy. Let's Imagine for a minute the following scenario: the stigma isn't centered on bisexual or homosexual actors, but the stigma was centered around women. All women. Could we condemn the men that weren't willing to have sex to them? Yes, sex is their job, but sex is also the most intimate physical iteration you can have with anyone. If you don't feel well about that, you work in an industry that pays for you to have sex, can't you have the right to choose? Once again, WE. ARE. NOT. THINGS.
I can't reconcile in good conscience my pro-choice stance with a mitigation of calling any woman sex worker in the porn industry homophobic for not being willing to have sex with any group. Let's say that she just literally didn't like having sex with men, but just women. She has a right to choose. We all have boundaries, we all have flaws, we all have hearts. We all have dreams. We all here are alive. And this girl is now gone.
I'll always be a staunch social progressive left wing with pro-choice views. I will fight side by side all the battles I possibly can for the LBGTQ+ and women. I will always be your ally. But I can't and I won't call a sex worker an homophobic because she was trying to protect herself in an industry that does absolutely very little for them and treat the women AND men like disposable objects. Because we are not things. We are more than the internet. Life is way too precious and people are WAY too precious to be reduced to "homophobic" over a freaking Twitter debacle. We are more than this buzzwords. Let's stop trying to label everything and everyone. We are not a hashtag. We are people. This whole situation is completely insane and I feel like people battling their own battles forget how fucking precious life is. How fucking fragile it is. Now we are here and with a blink of an eye, a twist of fate, one bad day.... we aren't. Remember that. Don't let this world become a dystopic nightmare. We are capable of so so much more.
We are not things. I love you all, Era. Good night.
We are not things. Not just women. All of us. We are not things. We are people. We are people with our own dreams, desires, traits, light, personalities, flaws, boundaries, fears, limits, boundaries, souls. We are not things. We are not this message we are typying. We are not these messages on a computer screen. There are people writing and reading what is said here and all of us are a whole universe facing our own battles every, single, day. Every single hour. Every single minute. Every single second. We are not things, fam. Regardless who you are. Regardless who you are talking to. We are not things.
When people say that she shouldn't recuse herself of having sex with an actor or actresses for whatever reason she has, we are taking away her right to choose. "But she doesn't do it with bi or homosexual actors and this is homophobic because that's their jobs, it's harmful to them". WE. ARE. NOT. THINGS. We are human, fam. We are all in this fucked up world together and we are all capable of the most incredible and beautiful acts, but also the most vile and horrifying ones. I want to propose here an exercise of empathy. Let's Imagine for a minute the following scenario: the stigma isn't centered on bisexual or homosexual actors, but the stigma was centered around women. All women. Could we condemn the men that weren't willing to have sex to them? Yes, sex is their job, but sex is also the most intimate physical iteration you can have with anyone. If you don't feel well about that, you work in an industry that pays for you to have sex, can't you have the right to choose? Once again, WE. ARE. NOT. THINGS.
I can't reconcile in good conscience my pro-choice stance with a mitigation of calling any woman sex worker in the porn industry homophobic for not being willing to have sex with any group. Let's say that she just literally didn't like having sex with men, but just women. She has a right to choose. We all have boundaries, we all have flaws, we all have hearts. We all have dreams. We all here are alive. And this girl is now gone.
I'll always be a staunch social progressive left wing with pro-choice views. I will fight side by side all the battles I possibly can for the LBGTQ+ and women. I will always be your ally. But I can't and I won't call a sex worker an homophobic because she was trying to protect herself in an industry that does absolutely very little for them and treat the women AND men like disposable objects. Because we are not things. We are more than the internet. Life is way too precious and people are WAY too precious to be reduced to "homophobic" over a freaking Twitter debacle. We are more than this buzzwords. Let's stop trying to label everything and everyone. We are not a hashtag. We are people. This whole situation is completely insane and I feel like people battling their own battles forget how fucking precious life is. How fucking fragile it is. Now we are here and with a blink of an eye, a twist of fate, one bad day.... we aren't. Remember that. Don't let this world become a dystopic nightmare. We are capable of so so much more.
We are not things. I love you all, Era. Good night.
There aren't enough companies that will shoot with condoms for any performer to get consistent work. The truth is that most companies, when gives the choice between a performer that'll shoot with a condom and a performer that will shoot without them, will almost always shoot the one without condoms, no matter the popularity of the one shooting with condoms.
Edit: April O'Neil is the most popular performer I can think of that is condom-only for boy/girl at the moment, and she shoots maybe once or twice a month, which isn't enough for most performers to sustain themselves.
Just read throug this entire thread and it was so weird to see this brought up over and over again haha. Say it again!
I know it’s anecdotal, but i’m black and don’t receive any of that kind of stigma or prejudice towards me. Have dated Caucasian, Mexican, and even a Pacific Islander. Almost a German, but she was a foreign exchange student. I’ll let you guys band together under that roof.
I say all that to say, people don’t see race differences and sexuality the same way. There’s different reasons people have for not dating other races (some are from racist roots) or not having sex with someone who does straight/gay porn. If they did, the gay community wouldn’t be so prejudiced.
I don’t watch porn, but I feel sorry for her! What she said wasn’t homophobic. She can decide who she has sex with for whatever reason she has.
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A lot of porn stars have a history of abuse, wouldn't surprise me if she had other issues going on.
Are you going to accuse me of being alt right next. A Trump supporter, perhaps?
This whole rant and you can't even acknowledge that she wasn't just talking about herself.I'm a hard ass progressive, pro-choice, pro LGBTQ+ rights, son of a black man and straight. I grew up in a country that being a left wing like I am is more similar to the kind of social progressivism envisioned by Bernie Sanders but even more extreme. But I feel like people here are forgetting things like personal boundaries and one important message that I saw in Fury Road not so long ago:
We are not things. Not just women. All of us. We are not things. We are people. We are people with our own dreams, desires, traits, light, personalities, flaws, boundaries, fears, limits, boundaries, souls. We are not things. We are not this message we are typying. We are not these messages on a computer screen. There are people writing and reading what is said here and all of us are a whole universe facing our own battles every, single, day. Every single hour. Every single minute. Every single second. We are not things, fam. Regardless who you are. Regardless who you are talking to. We are not things.
When people say that she shouldn't recuse herself of having sex with an actor or actresses for whatever reason she has, we are taking away her right to choose. "But she doesn't do it with bi or homosexual actors and this is homophobic because that's their jobs, it's harmful to them". WE. ARE. NOT. THINGS. We are human, fam. We are all in this fucked up world together and we are all capable of the most incredible and beautiful acts, but also the most vile and horrifying ones. I want to propose here an exercise of empathy. Let's Imagine for a minute the following scenario: the stigma isn't centered on bisexual or homosexual actors, but the stigma was centered around women. All women. Could we condemn the men that weren't willing to have sex to them? Yes, sex is their job, but sex is also the most intimate physical iteration you can have with anyone. If you don't feel well about that, you work in an industry that pays for you to have sex, can't you have the right to choose? Once again, WE. ARE. NOT. THINGS.
I can't reconcile in good conscience my pro-choice stance with a mitigation of calling any woman sex worker in the porn industry homophobic for not being willing to have sex with any group. Let's say that she just literally didn't like having sex with men, but just women. She has a right to choose. We all have boundaries, we all have flaws, we all have hearts. We all have dreams. We all here are alive. And this girl is now gone.
I'll always be a staunch social progressive left wing with pro-choice views. I will fight side by side all the battles I possibly can for the LBGTQ+ and women. I will always be your ally. But I can't and I won't call a sex worker an homophobic because she was trying to protect herself in an industry that does absolutely very little for them and treat the women AND men like disposable objects. Because we are not things. We are more than the internet. Life is way too precious and people are WAY too precious to be reduced to "homophobic" over a freaking Twitter debacle. We are more than this buzzwords. Let's stop trying to label everything and everyone. We are not a hashtag. We are people. This whole situation is completely insane and I feel like people battling their own battles forget how fucking precious life is. How fucking fragile it is. Now we are here and with a blink of an eye, a twist of fate, one bad day.... we aren't. Remember that. Don't let this world become a dystopic nightmare. We are capable of so so much more.
We are not things. I love you all, Era. Good night.
eventually you'll get sick of the charade and say what you really want to say
What are you going on about? No one is saying she *has* to do anything. Just saying that her reasoning is homophobic is in no way making a value judgement over her whole character or forcing her to do anything.I'm a hard ass progressive, pro-choice, pro LGBTQ+ rights, son of a black man and straight. I grew up in a country that being a left wing like I am is more similar to the kind of social progressivism envisioned by Bernie Sanders but even more extreme. But I feel like people here are forgetting things like personal boundaries and one important message that I saw in Fury Road not so long ago:
We are not things. Not just women. All of us. We are not things. We are people. We are people with our own dreams, desires, traits, light, personalities, flaws, boundaries, fears, limits, boundaries, souls. We are not things. We are not this message we are typying. We are not these messages on a computer screen. There are people writing and reading what is said here and all of us are a whole universe facing our own battles every, single, day. Every single hour. Every single minute. Every single second. We are not things, fam. Regardless who you are. Regardless who you are talking to. We are not things.
When people say that she shouldn't recuse herself of having sex with an actor or actresses for whatever reason she has, we are taking away her right to choose. "But she doesn't do it with bi or homosexual actors and this is homophobic because that's their jobs, it's harmful to them". WE. ARE. NOT. THINGS. We are human, fam. We are all in this fucked up world together and we are all capable of the most incredible and beautiful acts, but also the most vile and horrifying ones. I want to propose here an exercise of empathy. Let's Imagine for a minute the following scenario: the stigma isn't centered on bisexual or homosexual actors, but the stigma was centered around women. All women. Could we condemn the men that weren't willing to have sex to them? Yes, sex is their job, but sex is also the most intimate physical iteration you can have with anyone. If you don't feel well about that, you work in an industry that pays for you to have sex, can't you have the right to choose? Once again, WE. ARE. NOT. THINGS.
I can't reconcile in good conscience my pro-choice stance with a mitigation of calling any woman sex worker in the porn industry homophobic for not being willing to have sex with any group. Let's say that she just literally didn't like having sex with men, but just women. She has a right to choose. We all have boundaries, we all have flaws, we all have hearts. We all have dreams. We all here are alive. And this girl is now gone.
I'll always be a staunch social progressive left wing with pro-choice views. I will fight side by side all the battles I possibly can for the LBGTQ+ and women. I will always be your ally. But I can't and I won't call a sex worker an homophobic because she was trying to protect herself in an industry that does absolutely very little for them and treat the women AND men like disposable objects. Because we are not things. We are more than the internet. Life is way too precious and people are WAY too precious to be reduced to "homophobic" over a freaking Twitter debacle. We are more than this buzzwords. Let's stop trying to label everything and everyone. We are not a hashtag. We are people. This whole situation is completely insane and I feel like people battling their own battles forget how fucking precious life is. How fucking fragile it is. Now we are here and with a blink of an eye, a twist of fate, one bad day.... we aren't. Remember that. Don't let this world become a dystopic nightmare. We are capable of so so much more.
We are not things. I love you all, Era. Good night.
She is dead. And all I can see is you constantly judging her here. You are doing it because you think what she said is wrong because it hits close to home. Because you don't think it's right. But she's dead, man. All her dreams? All her life? All gone. I'm honestly moved by this story and I feel like I can empathize with her pain. I can empathize with the feeling of being misunderstood. The way you are posting here is one of the reasons I'm coming back to the thread. Not because I want to prove you wrong, but because I believe that you are better than this and you're hurt. She is not coming back, but you don't need to go with your life thinking like this. You can either hold your ground with your positions, or you can be human and empathize. Don't be like the side that thrives on hate and lack of empathy, man.
We can do better. And I've been crying for at least five hours now. 'Night Era, night RedHill.
Are you an alt or have you made it your life's singular mission to travel the world finding victims to blame and abusers to defend? Because now that he pointed it out, that post history is definitely something else lol
User warned: constantly derailing the thread, concern trolling
Which is? I'm sorry that you find it offensive that I think we should listen to the views of all women on sexual harassment and assault, even if it isn't a popular stance.
She was the victim here, she did not name anyone. She is not here to defend herself because people chose to abuse her for trying to do the right thing in an industry full people doing the wrong thing. She tried to warn a fellow performer and was met with hate and abuse which pushed her over the edge. Her warning was based on experience in the industry and factual statistics, she did nothing wrong, she is the victim. Was. She was 23 years old.
Where has empathy gone?
You know it's completely possible to empathize with her and be saddened that she is gone and ALSO believe what she said was homophobic right? Many in this thread have this exact position and have made it very clear.
The fact that some people here can't seem to express their sadness of her being gone without saying "it's not homophobic" is interesting.
"i think we should listen to all women, assuming they are saying bad shit about women"
Her death doesn't remove the message she pushed that so many of you are defending over and over again. Once again, you don't acknowledge what was actually said and try to push my comments into some disrespectful territory because she's dead. Just go to sleep because you have nothing of value to say.
My mistake, totally justified into harassing her to the point of suicide then...
The empathy is in the past 15 pages where I talked about the tragedy of her death. She doesn't need to be here to defend yourself because I'm not talking to her. I'm talking to all of you that defend her words and use her death to not argue back when your position is questioned.
Pal, I've been in this thread for hours. So many of you have tried to put these words in my mouth when my initial post talked about how mental health needs to be destigmatized and how her death is tragic. If you believe that online harrassment is wrong then don't do it here by berating a stranger and claiming they said something that you know damn well that they didn't
I disagree. I think you are incorrect. I think that losing empathy and not being able to empathize is exactly what alt-right people do to a fault. I don't like it when I see "my side" doing it and I'm calling out on it. I'm just saying I disagree and I'm hoping that just like I can understand why you see it this way, you can empathize and understand why I see it differently. Either way, I'd really appreciate if people would stop quoting me here. I have said what I thought I need to say on this thread. Good night.
So, let me just clarify.
You are literally saying that ALL the people in this thread who think what she said was homophobic do NOT have empathy for her?
You're saying that the ONLY way you can POSSIBLY have empathy for her to is to believe that her comments are not homophobic?
I just want to make sure that's what you're saying.
And yet, in this case, this woman didn't say a thing about women.
So I have no empathy at all because I don't let people use her death as an opportunity to spout homophobic opinions?
"Anyone that takes offense to her words are fucked up and have no empathy. Also don't respond to me. Bye!"
I feel like saying this means you're talking in bad faith. You essentially tried to lay down what you thought was an ether tier rant and "that's that" with zero room to budge. That's not how a discussion works, let alone a forum.
It's tragic that someone died, because life is a sacred thing.
It's more so tragic that someone killed themselves, because the moment ending your existence seems like the only course of action, something has gone terribly wrong. No one should ever want to die, and no one should ever be pushed to that point.
It's also a shame that she held and expressed what people could interpret as homophobic views, but it's also understandable why she may have held those views, based on the industry she worked in.
All of these things can be true at once. It's not an either/or.
I mean you could. But its like a heated internet debate on circumcision. Might ruin your day but chances are you arent gonna walk away. Now replace a thread about tipping to a bunch of people who know your real name wishing death on you.
i remember when you made jesse lacey's sexual deviance about a feud between some stupid emo band feud from 15 years ago. now you're making stupid movie references in a thread about a suicide. maybe you should just take a step back until you have more of a grip on these issues.
Are people actually spouting homophobic opinions and using her death as a way to get around it in this thread? I just see a lot of people making this sad case about themselves and their views more than anything.
She said that her doing a scene with him is bullshit and "Do agents really not care about who they’re representing?" because they were getting a girl to do a scene with someone who does gay porn.
People keep saying that her views are fine and justified and when you argue with them about it they bring up her death as you not having sympathy. They dip their toe in the discourse and then throw you into a pit when you disagree with them instead of defending their stance.
Well, from the logic of us thinking that her comments were homophobic, and people in the thread agreeing with her comments and making the same ones, they would also be homophobic comments.
There's quite a bit of "Don't use her death to push your agenda, but also what she said wasn't homophobic at all and I agree!"
This thread is shameful.
Looks like the porn business ate another person up and spat them out. Quite shocked she was only 23.
Looks like the porn business ate another person up and spat them out. Quite shocked she was only 23.
You said it better than me. My anger mainly stems from the defense and agreement of her comments from these users who then use her death as a shield when you explain your side.
We need to be aware that it can be very difficult to handle a lot of criticism coming at you and use our judgement about when to add to it.
But in a discussion about it, we can't minimise biphobia or try to justify it.
But in a discussion about it, we can't minimise biphobia or try to justify it.
Ok, I think you're misreading that completely. She was letting a fellow performer know that the agents and producers in this case where not being upfront and that she found out on her own information that she felt was relevant to her decision making process. The "BS" was that information not being made available to her. The part about agents not caring is the same, why are they withholding information from their clients? Whether or not you or they feel that information is worthwhile is irrelevant, they chose to withhold it without concern for the feelings of their client.
You seem to be reading anger towards the other performers where there is none.
That stick together shit only seems to appear when the other groups want us to co-sign, but when we need them, crickets.
Unless there's different testing for STD's or something like that, what she said was extremely homophobic,and reminds me of the horrible things people said in the 80/90 about gay men and HIV.
Still, awful what happened to her. May she rest in peace.
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