So, I felt a bit guilty about my life today

[Relix]

I am undergoing some sort of thought Renaissance with the way the world is going and how I can probably make a change, but, really not happy to use a religious term, but damn I am blessed.

So, I am a latino male, but I am white enough that I can probably pass as a white dude (until I open my mouth and the accent kicks in!). I am heterosexual, and I thankfully I am in a great financial position with a growing career in a high demand field and a side consulting business. I have a great fiancée who also has a great job in a similar field, and we have no kids or anything. We are the perfect definition of DINK family.

Here I am, sitting by the pool in my luxury apartment complex, listening to great music in Spotify on my S8 plus, a kindle paper white, and my apartment room at a perfectly cool 68 degrees so when I return from the pool I can just take a cold shower and sit back and play shit on my consoles in my OLED.

And... This is unfair. There's so many people fucked up out there and all this time I've been just enjoying myself. These past few weeks have made me think and although I should know I shouldn't feel bad, I just know someone a few miles away from me is homeless, or there's a family without money to buy food for the day. In the past I chalked this up to "poor life choices" and in a sense I could be right, but I have been reading more on inequalities and things. Don't get me wrong, I am a capitalist dude. I believe capitalism is a great system, but I do believe we need to move toward a social democracy in the US.

So I felt bad about enjoying life like this. That hadn't happened before but with the state of the world these days its a bit jarring. I started looking at Meet-up and found a few causes I could help with, especially regarding education and animals. I already contacted a local group with regards of teaching disadvantaged kids some programming, and also a local animal shelter so I can supply food or even play with the animals there a bit. Still, can't shake this sudden feeling of guilt. I think I can do more perhaps politically?

 

[Blablurn]

Dont you also sometimes think about the homeless you see on the streets? Society is fuck. There shouldnt be homeless.

Everything is so fucked

 

[Br3wnor]

Sorry about the S8, hopefully one day you can afford an S9.

Use your privilege to do some good, unless you want to renounce your possessions and become a missionary or something you're always gonna have stuff to feel guilty about.

 

[Pwnz]

With a bit of humility, you'll realize that the best you can do are small things. You're just one person. Small things I do include paying extra on power to be 100% renewable, carefully research for elections to benefit humanity long term, help out family and friends, and be of service to others. You're right it isn't fair but beyond doing what you can you are just one person and ultimately have a tiny impact.

 

[neon_dream]

How terrible, having a comfortable life. Maybe do some volunteering or donate some money.

 

[Cybersai]

There are millions of people worse off than you and millions of people better off with millions of more dollars than you. Try hard not to think about it much, there's like 9 billion people on the planet. Life unfortunately isn't fair for everyone.

I am poor but I realize it can always be worse, so I don't complain.

 

[Deleted member 24907]

Support a cause and get involved. Beyond that, you're only one person so don't feel too guilty about the injustices plaguing the world.

 

[ItsBobbyDarin]

This is why the American dream in the US is a lie. The poor and the homeless have little to no chance at all to change their lives, since the social barrier stops them.

Denmark (and other Scandinavian countries are living the American Dream). Here, people who are poor or jobless, are at their own fault. There are many social benefits which are even out-paying minimum wage jobs, education is free and you even get paid monthly to take an education. All homeless in Denmark are in some way mentally ill, and they do not want help from society and actually excludes themselves.

So yes, the US needs a more social democratic, but capitalistic society.

EDIT: You are not privileged, and you are entitled to your wealth since you worked hard for it. What you do with it, is up to you. You can donate, start a charity in your free time, help the local homeless, etc.

 

[EatChildren]

Be humble, and don't beat yourself up over factors you cannot control. I'm a white, early-30s male born in a well developed Western country. I was born to a middle class family and was raised with no major financial or social issues. I would assume statistically I am among the most privileged a modern human could possibly be born to be, but I feel no guilt and no shame because of my identity and the plethora of social conveniences I was born into because they were all beyond my control. I had no bearing on the world that came before me, and I had no influence over the genetic lottery, no matter how justified or unjustified the context of my privileged can be. Guilt is a toxic emotion when applied haphazardly to factors a person had no control over. You should never feel guilty over these things.

What I and you can do is recognise our fortunes, and the luck involved, and utilise our position of privileges to assist those who unjustifiably are without. That's having a conscious awareness of your situation, and that is how you bring about change. You don't need to solve the world's problems, but do your little bit to balance the equation.

 

[Rendering...]

The world isn't fair, and guilt won't change that. Donate as much money and volunteer work as you're comfortable with, and enjoy your life. You can't carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, but you can make a difference to the people you meet by being kind and helping local charities or humanitarian projects.

 

[New Donker]

As I was reading your post I was going to suggest you do some volunteer work but you have that covered.

Just enjoy the ride and give back if you can/want to.

 

[Deleted member 6498]

⁣

 

[Dook's Revenge]

You're alright by me.

Send me a couple bucks.

 

[F34R]

I am undergoing some sort of thought Renaissance with the way the world is going and how I can probably make a change, but, really not happy to use a religious term, but damn I am blessed.

So, I am a latino male, but I am white enough that I can probably pass as a white dude (until I open my mouth and the accent kicks in!). I am heterosexual, and I thankfully I am in a great financial position with a growing career in a high demand field and a side consulting business. I have a great fiancée who also has a great job in a similar field, and we have no kids or anything. We are the perfect definition of DINK family.

Here I am, sitting by the pool in my luxury apartment complex, listening to great music in Spotify on my S8 plus, a kindle paper white, and my apartment room at a perfectly cool 68 degrees so when I return from the pool I can just take a cold shower and sit back and play shit on my consoles in my OLED.

And... This is unfair. There's so many people fucked up out there and all this time I've been just enjoying myself. These past few weeks have made me think and although I should know I shouldn't feel bad, I just know someone a few miles away from me is homeless, or there's a family without money to buy food for the day. In the past I chalked this up to "poor life choices" and in a sense I could be right, but I have been reading more on inequalities and things. Don't get me wrong, I am a capitalist dude. I believe capitalism is a great system, but I do believe we need to move toward a social democracy in the US.

So I felt bad about enjoying life like this. That hadn't happened before but with the state of the world these days its a bit jarring. I started looking at Meet-up and found a few causes I could help with, especially regarding education and animals. I already contacted a local group with regards of teaching disadvantaged kids some programming, and also a local animal shelter so I can supply food or even play with the animals there a bit. Still, can't shake this sudden feeling of guilt. I think I can do more perhaps politically?

Click to shrink...

I've never felt guilty about doing well. I've always had a drive to help others regardless of my own situation. Ask yourself this; are you doing this so you won't feel guilty, or are you changing your lifestyle so you can help others. That's how I address my kids about these things.

 

[geomon]

I am undergoing some sort of thought Renaissance with the way the world is going and how I can probably make a change, but, really not happy to use a religious term, but damn I am blessed.

So, I am a latino male, but I am white enough that I can probably pass as a white dude (until I open my mouth and the accent kicks in!). I am heterosexual, and I thankfully I am in a great financial position with a growing career in a high demand field and a side consulting business. I have a great fiancée who also has a great job in a similar field, and we have no kids or anything. We are the perfect definition of DINK family.

Here I am, sitting by the pool in my luxury apartment complex, listening to great music in Spotify on my S8 plus, a kindle paper white, and my apartment room at a perfectly cool 68 degrees so when I return from the pool I can just take a cold shower and sit back and play shit on my consoles in my OLED.

And... This is unfair. There's so many people fucked up out there and all this time I've been just enjoying myself. These past few weeks have made me think and although I should know I shouldn't feel bad, I just know someone a few miles away from me is homeless, or there's a family without money to buy food for the day. In the past I chalked this up to "poor life choices" and in a sense I could be right, but I have been reading more on inequalities and things. Don't get me wrong, I am a capitalist dude. I believe capitalism is a great system, but I do believe we need to move toward a social democracy in the US.

So I felt bad about enjoying life like this. That hadn't happened before but with the state of the world these days its a bit jarring. I started looking at Meet-up and found a few causes I could help with, especially regarding education and animals. I already contacted a local group with regards of teaching disadvantaged kids some programming, and also a local animal shelter so I can supply food or even play with the animals there a bit. Still, can't shake this sudden feeling of guilt. I think I can do more perhaps politically?

Click to shrink...

Don't feel bad, enjoy your life. Be thankful that you can and pay it forward when you can. We're all in this fight together.

 

[Jessie]

Don't feel too guilty, some of those people you pity have iPhones.

But in all seriousness, never feel bad about things that aren't your fault. Instead think of it as empowerment. You have the ability to make a difference, so do what you can. Volunteer for elections. Knock on doors. March in the streets.

 

[Toumari]

Do you pay for Spotify Premium?

 

[Woolley]

I'll take some money if you think it'll make you feel better.

 

[ItsBobbyDarin]

Sorry, but this is pure nonsense.

Click to shrink...

Please, enlighten me why.

 

[UnholyChocolate]

Get a OnePlus next time, you will have a better user experience.

Yeah society is fucked and the government should be doing more for the homeless, like they should here in the UK. But it's just he governments we have.

 

[The_Land]

You do you man, nothing to feel bad about. You probably worked your ass off to get where you are. Most people are lazy.

 

[finalflame]

There are people far better off than you. Give back if you wanna, many people do. This thread is...interesting.

 

[Deepthought_]

White Latino , you must be what the Trump supporters are afraid of

 

[AKingNamedPaul]

awesome that you have compassion, but you aren't to blame for the worlds inequality sir.

 

[GLHFGodbless]

This some kind of stealth brag thread?

 

[liquidtmd]

Appreciate what you have sure but you can't live where you're constantly rationalizing your life in relation to the status of others.

You will go insane

 

[Ikuu]

This some kind of stealth brag thread?

Click to shrink...

Nothing stealth about it lol.

 

[Taki]

How you carry yourself and treat others from here on out matters more.

 

[Relix]

Thanks for the suggestions and comments guys. A nearby dog shelter group replied and I'll be bringing on some supplies over the week so theres that

Sorry about the S8, hopefully one day you can afford an S9.

Use your privilege to do some good, unless you want to renounce your possessions and become a missionary or something you're always gonna have stuff to feel guilty about.

Click to shrink...

I know this doesn't help but I am thinking of waiting for next iPhone :o

Do you pay for Spotify Premium?

Click to shrink...

I do. Family plan for my friends and family :p

 

[CrankyJay]

You do you man, nothing to feel bad about. You probably worked your ass off to get where you are. Most people are lazy.

Click to shrink...

Yeah, there's a ton of hardworking people that can't ahead, either. And even though Relix is doing well for himself, a medical calamity can unwind his pocketbook real fast.

 

[Taki]

Yeah, there's a ton of hardworking people that can't ahead, either. And even though Relix is doing well for himself, a medical calamity can unwind his pocketbook real fast.

Click to shrink...

Now we're talking about the biggest and most uniquely American problem that needs to be solved...

 

[Relix]

This some kind of stealth brag thread?

Click to shrink...

Honestly it wasn't. My excuses if it came out like that. Perhaps I can change the wording?

 

[Abu]

would you mind paying my student loans fam? or you could send me your oled tv, im fine with both.

 

[Bengraven]

Why not an S9? Can't afford to upgrade?

 

[Deleted member 7753]

would you mind paying my student loans fam? or you could send me your oled tv, im fine with both.

Click to shrink...

While i was driving my Lambo today, i was thinking about how bad your loans must be

 

[Siggy-P]

Plenty of ways you can donate and help out those less fortunate. And it's goood that you have empathy for those less fortunate.

But remember though that it's not your fault the system is fucked. As long as you're not explicitly making anyone elses life worse you have no reason to feel explicitly guilty.

If you wanna do something just do what you feel you can do. That can make a difference for a lot of people.

 

[The_Land]

Honestly it wasn't. My excuses if it came out like that. Perhaps I can change the wording?

Click to shrink...

Your wording is fine. People are just jealous. Happens in everyone of these threads.

 

[Deleted member 17092]

I'll dm you my PayPal if you want to help someone out.

 

[Aprikurt]

Lol you sound like me OP. You've got it good, and don't know how to be content. It's all going fine.

 

[M.J.]

This is the kind of thing you ask your close friends, or get advice from wealthy or successful people... not post on a public forum... Unless you wanted to brag to a bunch of people who know very little about you and your upbringing.

Aside from my criticism of the premise, OT, I think there are some good suggestions here.

Donate your time to charity. Money is fine too, but your time is a lot more valuable. It is basically all we can do, but most of us don't have the luxury to donate our time if we wanted to.

I personally would feel just fine in your position, but I am aware of how tough a lot of people have it. Maybe you're just bored.

 

[Rayne]

Support a cause and get involved. Beyond that, you're only one person so don't feel too guilty about the injustices plaguing the world.

Click to shrink...

This.

Not your fault the world is fucked that said we can all chip in to make it a bit better. Long as you're not actively making it worse the guilt is mindless.

The world isn't fair, and guilt won't change that. Donate as much money and volunteer work as you're comfortable with, and enjoy your life. You can't carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, but you can make a difference to the people you meet by being kind and helping local charities or humanitarian projects.

Click to shrink...

This pretty much :D

 

[Evildeadhead]

Wouldn't the starving families and homeless appreciate the food more than stray dogs?

No wonder we're fucked.

Congrats on the sweet setup though dude! Bet God of War looks sick!!!

 

[Oilvomer]

Easy, have 4 chrildren dress them in MAGA hats, job done, balance restored

 

[New Donker]

Yeah, there's a ton of hardworking people that can't ahead, either. And even though Relix is doing well for himself, a medical calamity can unwind his pocketbook real fast.

Click to shrink...

Unless your spouse works in the medical field and you have no co-pay or deductible

 

[BladeoftheImmortal]

People saying to donate, don't. I'd work more to get higher taxes for the super rich (yea right) and healthcare for all (yea right). Welfare and government run social services are much better equipped to help the masses.

Majority of charities stroke the ego of all involved and is just another way of funneling money up. You don't need million dollar banquets to help others.

Don't feel guilty like people say, but also don't act like you deserved everything you've made. Everyone has had help to get to the top, even though most at the top would never admit to such a delporable thing.

If you really want to help financially, find one of your friends struggling to pay off student loans or a mortgage and instead of going on that extravagant vacation. Help them out. If I was ever in that position. I would hope that would be me. Hell I already made my best friend my Roth ira beneficiary if I kick the bucket early. It isn't much, but I hope it will help him.

 

[Dad_and_Videogames]

It's good to see analyze yourself. Lots of folks never even bother.

It's like the old quote "Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.". If you see someone or some place you can help out, go for it. Seems like you're already on that road.

 

[GameAddict411]

You shouldn't feel about guilty about what you were born with, but you should definitely feel guilty when you pass opportunities to help people who are much less privileged than you. Recognition of these privileges is the first step, but what's next is totally on you.

 

[Threadkular]

OP, I can strongly relate to what you're going through. And regardless of what anyone says, it takes a lot of bravery to express it, because you're almost guaranteed to get some responses (as seen in this thread) of "I wish I had your problems" or something else to dismiss your feelings.

I've let existential guilt (a term I recommend Googling) get me really down and into a place of depression and alcohol abuse. It's a weird paradox, because your sensitivity to notice pain and injustice is a wonderful thing, but you do no one any good in punishing yourself for it (there's no glory in the struggle) and it just takes away from you helping others (even if that means taking personal time for yourself to relax so you can get up the next day and keep speaking out). My Christian upbringing sometimes leads to me forget this due to the praise of the martyrdom in the Jesus story (which I now believe is horseshit, but I judge no one else if it gives them strength).

Keep speaking out and doing what you can to affect change in the world (volunteer, mentor, vote, etc.). If you want to go the "missionary" route you'll have my infinite respect, but that's a lot to give up for your short time alive.

Also keep making posts like this. I feed off this type of vulnerability, especially from other men. It's evolution in real time I think.

 

[Doctoglethorpe]

That feeling of guilt is driving you to charitable acts, so it's a good thing. The intention of pain is to get your attention and make you aware of a problem. Existential problems included. So it's doing it's job.

 

[Mathieran]

Glad you realized your position of privilege OP. One of the first things you can do is let your temperature in your apartment go up a bit unless you're on renewable energy. 68 degrees is crazy, we keep our house at 75ish in the summer and 70ish in the winter. Being environmentally friendly is one of the most important things you can do.

Also thanks for giving time to animals in need :)

Don't feel bad about your life, just do what you can do give back.