So I just exchanged punches with my father in law this Christmas Eve.

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Oct 28, 2017
That's it, my dear friends. That was the biggest shitshow that could have happened to me. No kidding. It's hard to properly tell you about it in english but I'll do my best.

I don't know if it's ok to laugh at other people's tragedy, but I'm going to tell you about this "happy time".
If you don't really want to know about it, this is the time to just go away and forget everything about it.
If you're still there... well, then let's go.

To sum it up. I've been dating this girl for 8 months. I've been to her house maybe 10 times at most. The reason? Her dad is an asshole.
And when I say asshole, I mean ASSHOLE, the guy always looked me down. Everytime we talked to each other the guy made it his mission to make me feel like a loser, he wanted to humiliated me.

Besides the fact that I was fucking his daughter, the other reason he hated me is that classic "he is from a different working class".
I'm not that poor, but I don't make a lot of money and they are from a very rich family. Her grandparents have been engineers, and they made a lot of money, but that had never came up when we were talking. Her father thinking I was there because of the money was bad enough, but we've been together for 8 months! Would it be too hard for the guy to just let us be together?

So, let's get to the present. My family went on a trip to stay with some family members. I had to work so I stayed here. And when you are dating someone and they don't like your friends, you end up being with them alone. It's the famous "it's either me or them".
Without my family and my friends, I had no alternative than to be with her on this Christmas Eve.
I didn't like the idea of spending this time with her family, but she said it was going to be ok. Well, I wanted to believe in her.

That's all good so far, right? So let's skip to the dinner and the fight.
You can imagine her dad. Not only he didn't want to look me in the eyes but he made sure I realized he was "subtly" talking shit about me. He wanted to humiliate me, he wanted to make sure I knew I was just a fucked up person that was lucky to be there.

The first thing that went wrong: They had a maid serving everybody at the table. But when she got close to me he stopped her. And LITERALLY SAID she should leave me alone. That I was used to serving my own food. It's hard to translate this but the point is that he made me feel like a pathetic loser to the rest of the family. My girlfriend noticed all this this and was looking to me with a sad face.

The second thing that went wrong, and this is where it gets bad: My cellphone rang. It was my mother wanting to wish me a merry christmas. I was going to answer it but then he PUNCHED THE TABLE: DON'T YOU KNOW THIS IS A LACK OF RESPECT? Again, I can't properly translate but he was very, VERY offensive.

Worst of all, even my mother on the other side of the phone realized the situation. So I left the table and tried to talked to her. You can imagine how mad I was at that point. I didn't even care about the dinner anymore. Fuck the dinner, fuck everything.

My girlfrind tried to talk to me. She asked who was on the phone. I said quietly to her it was my mother. But the fucker listened, and he had to make a fucking joke about mothers, my mother:
- What about your mother? Do you let her call you on your cellphone? I don't let "maids" call me on my cellphone. I would just fucking fire them. And fuck them.

That was it. I would feel like a PIECE OF SHIT for the rest of my life if I didn't react. If I didn't break these motherfucker's teeth right there, right now.
Ok, I would have to break up with my girlfriend. It would ruin the family's Christmas and all that. But that was it. He was ofending me for the sake of it. I had to fight back.

I just turn on a "fuck off mode". I can barely remember the words because I was so angry. But it went more or less like this:
- Talk to me "Zezé". What a good day you're having. Let me tell you something. I've been thinking, I know it's been hard for you, I know you have to work hard, but I have to speak for myself. You're a PIECE OF SHIT. I SHOULD JUST FUCK YOU UP AND BREAK ALL YOUR BONES!. DO YOU WANT TO TALK SHIT ABOUT MY MOTHER?

And then he got up and screamed:

"SIT THE FUCK DOWN YOU FUKING LOSER" And he threw his glass of wine at me. It hit my arm.

Now that dinner table was in chaos. My girlfrind was trying to hold me, her sister was crying and everything was going to thell.

But I was beyond me. I was in the "fuck off mode". I walked, I ran around the table. I was ready to kill him right there. And he came for me too, with pure hatred in his eyes. Then I looked at the window behind the table. What I saw was a kind of small, unmanned aircraft flying really quickly. Right after it I could see some sort of metal exoskeleton wielding a machine gun. And out of no where a huge boom and a big, bright bang. The era of the machines had began.
Apr 14, 2018
The ending of T2 worked so well because John saw the T-800 as his surrogate father. However, it's strange that John took more kindly to his fake father than his real mother. Mayhaps his background with her and her perceived mental illness permanently affected his perception of her despite the fact that everything she said was true. I'm not sure but one thing is for certain, every movie past 2 is not worth watching, just like Return of the Jedi.


Oct 26, 2017
Man, I'm sorry to hear that. That father sounds like a huge asshole. But saying you want to break his bones was a mistake; it gave him an excuse to go even harder at you. But I don't blame you for acting that way.


Oct 12, 2019
I would like to experience "the fuck off mode", it sounds like a fun place to be.


Oct 25, 2017
I must have missed this Terminator sequel because I don't get the story leading up to the joke.

Elderly Parrot

Attempted to circumvent ban with alt account
Aug 13, 2018
This is a good example of why you should never read the OP and go straight to the comments


Oct 27, 2017
At least he didn't tell you about back in nineteen ninety-eight when the Undertaker threw Mankind off hеll in a cell, and plummeted sixteen feet through an announcer’s table.


Oct 25, 2017
I was reading it and it made me empathize with you because my girlfriend's father called me a loser and now I feel terrible about it because of your joke.


Oct 28, 2017
Holy shit this have been not locked up yet? This is the best Christmas I've had since I was 8 years old!

Thanks Era.


The Fallen
Oct 27, 2017
I was reading it and it made me empathize with you because I'm John Connor and now I feel terrible about it because of your joke.

Snake Eater

Oct 27, 2017
OP is the reason people don’t read OP’s, you end up wasting time... glad I skipped to the last line
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