So I was just ditched midway through a date

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Meelow

Member
Oct 31, 2017
3,795
So I was talking to this guy the past 5 days and we were video chatting for hours on ends, having really good conversation and all that. Today was our first (and guess last date) and it was going really well. He lives an hour and 50 minutes away from me so he literally drove all this way for the date. The plan was he was going to stay at my apartment after we ate. Now I don't live in a very nice place, I have 2 other roommates and they can be messy, the only room I use in my apartment is my room which is very clean.

We were going to play some Smash and a little bit later cuddle, but he got a call from his friend who sounded "upset" and he said his friend cat died and she wanted him to hang out with her because she was so "upset"

I found this weird because the coincidence of this happening is just odd, so I said it's okay he can meet her and he said he will try to be back, etc. He left and 30 minutes later he said he is sorry he found me cool but he thought the apartment was "jarring", etc

HE FUCKING LIED ABOUT HIS FRIEND'S CAT DYING TO GET OUT OF THIS DATE.

Who fucking does that? He has a cat of his own so hopefully for his sake karma doesn't come for him and bite him in his ass.

The funny thing is he was texting someone for a good while, while on the date so he is clearly just a full on lier.

I'm so fucking hurt right now.

He also blocked me on facebook, etc.
 

Blue Skies

Member
Mar 27, 2019
7,951
View this from a positive perspective.
you just saved a LOT of time from being wasted on this person
 

Titik

Member
Oct 25, 2017
6,294
Feel your feelings, then move on. Plenty of fish in that sea. It doesn’t seem that way but yea this feeling will pass. Do what you need to do to nurse your ego and mental well-being back up.

Sorry this happened to you, op. It’s a sucky feeling, I know.
 

DrewFu

Banned
Apr 19, 2018
10,359
Pics of said apartment?

Seriously, though, sorry that happened. That sucks.
 

TrubbleFrog

Member
Feb 23, 2018
70
If someone drove over an hour to go on a date and they end up sitting on their phone the whole time they probably suck anyway.

That’s an unfortunate situation to be put in, but you dodged a bullet.
 

Kelsdesu

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,159
Hold that L and move on. This person doesn't value your time, so they can kick rocks and when he calls you again (and he will) don't even respond. Sorry that shit happened.
 

FaceHugger

Member
Oct 27, 2017
9,904
U, S, and A
Back in my early 20's a woman walked out on a date. I thought things were going OK, after about 30 minutes of her leaving I sent her a text and she said she wanted to leave because I reminded her of her ex. We were only together for maybe 15 minutes.

Silver lining, our waitress and I hit it off. We dated for several months. She was awesome. So things kind of worked out?
 
Oct 27, 2017
17,265
I had a girl do something similar. We were legit 15 minutes into a date, she goes to the bathroom then comes out back to our table. Then she gets a call from her sister who apparently was visiting for the weekend and lost her spare key. So she has to go back home and I never hear from her again. I'm pretty sure she was just in it for free meals. The first date she didn't so much as flinch when the check came and this time I ordered first so she had to pay for her meal (it was at a barcade, not a restaurant)

So I know your pain, OP. People can be assholes and inconsiderate and it's better it didn't work out
 

Fuchsia

Member
Oct 28, 2017
4,523
You dodged such a bullet. I’m sorry OP. Definitely feel your emotions and take your time because that sucks big time but also... that guy sucks and you’re better off without him.
 

Kyoufu

Member
Oct 26, 2017
12,091
Your apartment must be an absolute shithole if your date had to make an excuse to bail on your date and then block you after.
 

sfedai0

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,880
I seriously doubt it had anything to do with the cleanliness of your apartment. The fact he was texting on a date says there is an issue already.
 

Tofer

Member
Oct 27, 2017
6,803
Strange first date. I don’t really blame him if he felt uncomfortable and wanted to bail seeing as the only other option would be to spend the night
 

Bitanator

Member
Oct 27, 2017
7,128
He saw your collection of Yugioh cards and he is more of a Magic the Gathering type of nerd, it happens OP
 

TaySan

Member
Dec 10, 2018
8,705
Look at it this way. He saved you a ton of time not wasting it on this loser. Better fish in the sea :)
 

TheMadTitan

Member
Oct 27, 2017
6,913
That's the understanding and comforting half of Era we all know.
The only logical conclusion is that the messy apartment did them in. No way in hell you can go from great texts, a nice date, and then back to the apartment to be ghosted. Ghosting would normally come well before that point or after some sex.

No one would get that far into it and leave without sex unless the apartment was a disaster.
 

Poppy

Member
Oct 25, 2017
10,641
corvallis, OR
haha

sorry op

did you split the food bill, i always like to look for the silver lining of getting to eat for free

actually i guess he spent a lot of gas to get there so earth was murdered for this bad date! better luck next time
 

Kangi

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,576
Elmore
Going to a dude's place for a first date--which that dude lives in with other people--can be nerve-wracking. Chances are he got anxious. At that point he's got three options: sheepishly telling you he wants out after he just drove hours to get there, bailing and reassessing later, or spending the night in an anxious situation. "Dead cat" is a weird excuse for a bailout call but I don't think I'd fault him for making choice #2

You've got a right to feel upset and dismayed, of course. But there's no shame in bailing

Perk up and best of luck with future bois. Maybe keep it lower-pressure going forward
 

kai3345

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,882
did you at least preface with "yo my roommates are messy, sorry" or just bring him in without any warning
 
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