So uh.... who did Palpatine cream the twinkie with? (TROS Spoilers)

What form did Palpatine look like when he had sex?


  • Total voters
    36
Status
Not open for further replies.

Bor Gullet

Member
Oct 27, 2017
8,129
"It's not a story the Jedi would tell you."

So from The Rise of Skywalker, we get a big revelation that good ol Sheev was boning. This could have been a secret lover/wife, or a prostitute, or maybe he had a one night stand.


This also opens up a whole other bunch of questions.

Did Palpatine have sex when he was looking like a wrinkly ballsack?


Or when he was a sexy senator (hopefully the latter).


When he had sex, was he passionate about it, or was too weak for it?

Exhibit A: Passion


Exhibit B: Too weak


Regardless this must have been the final result when Sheev nutted into the poor woman who give birth to Rey's father.
 

SchrodingerC

Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,625
I quite dislike how this movie has us question who Palps banged.
This is not how the 10s should end. 😐
 

BDS

Member
Oct 25, 2017
12,948
Well I can tell you one thing, we definitely need a six part comic series about it.
 

Calles

Member
Nov 1, 2017
6,669
Papa Palpatine did the true trench run while in his younger days as an up and comer.
 

DrBo42

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
2,824
I guess it’s open season for RoS spoilers in titles. Even if it’s a complete joke.
 

thewienke

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,466
My head canon is kinda dark where Palpatine was fucking around with force genetics on some kind of "human farm". Seems more plausible to me than anything else.
 

skeezx

Member
Oct 27, 2017
8,569
serious answer- as grandad the timeline qualifies him as "eligible bachelor" around his son's birth so could be anybody

i doubt the future canon will explain it mundanely as sheev prowling the bar scene but if we have RotS to go on in a vacuum, that's more or less what it is
 

Happenstance

Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,530
United Kingdom
Was it confirmed somewhere that Anakin was created by Palpatine and genetic tampering to try and create a powerful Sith? I know I've seen people talk about it but can't remember if it was real or just over zealous theories.
 

Tharp

Member
Oct 27, 2017
4,253
I would guess that it wasn’t a story of romance and love, damn.
Yeah dude was a powerful head of an empire, and was notoriously evil and not exactly a looker by that point. Either he found someone just as evil as him who had very unique tastes in looks, or it wasn't them having a kid due to love. I have to assume if someone as politically powerful as him desired a woman to have a child with, his underlings would find a way to make it happen.

But it's less problematic to assume he just found another evil villain woman who was super into men who look like weird potatoes.
 

The Silver

Member
Oct 28, 2017
6,069
Was it confirmed somewhere that Anakin was created by Palpatine and genetic tampering to try and create a powerful Sith? I know I've seen people talk about it but can't remember if it was real or just over zealous theories.
No, there's a comic that keeps getting taken out of context. It's still ambiguous if Anakin is a Sith creation or not.
 

Soybean

Member
Nov 12, 2017
125
I was definitely thinking Force immaculate conception, but then how would the mother know it was a Palpatine baby?
 
Oct 8, 2019
1,057
This is how they are going to bring in Mara Jade into the Star Wars universe. They are going to reveal that Emperor Palpatine had sex with Mara Jade in Dexter Jettster's cafe while Dexter regaled them with his exploits, then Grandma Mara Jade is going to show up to go on Jedi adventures with Rey.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.