Taking a massive dump at the office and you leave the bathroom to...

Dan Thunder

Member
Nov 2, 2017
3,888
What's worse is going into the toilet after someone else has taken a massive dump and then coming out to find a colleague out there.
 

Zombine

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,858
How about when you’re going to the bathroom, the unwritten law is that when the door is closed it is occupied and locked, then you get that ONE person who thinks that they should rapidly turn the knob and attempt to breach.
 
OP
OP
fanboi

fanboi

The Fallen
Oct 25, 2017
4,218
Sweden
How about when you’re going to the bathroom, the unwritten law is that when the door is closed it is occupied and locked, then you get that ONE person who thinks that they should rapidly turn the knob and attempt to breach.
Especially when you are looking at photos on that one crush at the office.
 

finfinfin

The Fallen
Jul 26, 2018
354
I know shitting on company time is praxis, but I can't bring myself to do it. I'm sorry. I just can't unless it's an emergency.
 

DarthWoo

Member
Oct 27, 2017
991
I find it worse when (since the bathrooms at my work are multiuser) I just go in to do a quick number one, and somebody else is just finishing up their number two and leaves before me, then somebody else arrives to that stank as I'm exiting.
 

Noppie

Member
Oct 27, 2017
5,488
Don't drop it if you ashamed of your own smell OP. Take pride in pooping while getting paid.
 

ara

Member
Oct 26, 2017
6,805
How about when you’re going to the bathroom, the unwritten law is that when the door is closed it is occupied and locked, then you get that ONE person who thinks that they should rapidly turn the knob and attempt to breach.
Holy shit, fuck these people. We even have handles that clearly show when the bathroom is locked and occupied outside and still some occasional moron comes and absolutely manhandles the door handle, literally startling the shit out of me.
 

Zombine

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,858
Holy shit, fuck these people. We even have handles that clearly show when the bathroom is locked and occupied outside and still some occasional moron comes and absolutely manhandles the door handle, literally startling the shit out of me.
It is genuinely moronic. Also, one time I accidentally forgot to lock and someone slowly opened the door. I said “Hey I’m in here” and they continued to open it.
 

Keuja

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,264
I've always found people queing for the toilet at work to be fucking weirdos. I mean can't you just do some work for 5 min and come back instead of planting yourself there like a moron. Maybe they enjoy the noises and the smell of their colleague shit.
 

Zonal Hertz

Banned
Jun 13, 2018
739
If the toilets are all in use I'll go away and check in 10 minutes. I never want to be the guy waiting for the offender to leave the crime scene.
 

Zip Stick

Member
Oct 30, 2017
202
Annoying in our place you cant tell if the toilets are in use. So if you are using them it always feels like you are on takeshis castle with someone trying to bust the door down.

 

Panther2103

Member
Oct 27, 2017
2,424
For me the worst is when I sit down in our bathroom and the cleaning people show up literally 3 seconds later. It feels awful.
 

CanUKlehead

Member
Oct 30, 2017
1,410
Gotta get over it I guess. I didn't start pooping outside my own place til like 10 years ago. Realised if you gotta go, you gotta go.

I live 3 mins away from work. I always takr a dump there. Saves money on toilet paper.

Hell i even have keys to the building so of I'm out on weekends, I stop by.
 

III-V

Member
Oct 25, 2017
6,366
Gotta get over it I guess. I didn't start pooping outside my own place til like 10 years ago. Realised if you gotta go, you gotta go.

I live 3 mins away from work. I always takr a dump there. Saves money on toilet paper.

Hell i even have keys to the building so of I'm out on weekends, I stop by.
Wow that is dedication
 

OrIok

Member
Oct 12, 2019
508
We have three stalls in our bathroom, and apparently myself and one of our programmers are on the exact same shit schedule because every time I go in there to take a grumpy, he's already mid-shit or he comes in to do his business while I'm mid-shit. And he INSISTS on using the middle stall regardless of what else is open, so either way I'm right next to his pooping ass. Why do you need the middle stall at all times? The corner stall against the wall is much nicer, much more secure...very cozy.
 

Landy828

Member
Oct 26, 2017
6,134
Clemson, SC
People sit on the naked toilet in public? Always toilet paper on the seat for me. Its more hygenic AND warm from the start.

I hate cold toilet seats so i do it at home aswell.
In 37 years I have not once sat directly on a public toilet seat, lol.

Always put at least one layer of toilet paper.

There are only four guys in our office and there are two bathrooms. Pretty easy to avoid a recent dump.
 

RainerDrix

Member
Oct 25, 2017
111
Long Island, NY
To remedy this issue I bought a 3 pack variety of the Yankee Candle concentrated room sprays. I'll throw it in my pocket before going to the restroom at work. Now when peeps are waiting to come in, I exit with the smell of cinnamon.
 

TriniTrin

Member
Oct 25, 2017
327
Denver, CO
I was consulting for this warehouse once and they had their managers office with IT in this little room that also housed the toilet. You could hear anyone's business because of how they just put it up with no insulation in the middle of the office. It was horrible!
 

mhayes86

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,698
Virginia
I just go to a different floor since it gives me a reason to walk around and go up/down stairs. Avoid colleagues, and it helps that our bathrooms have multiple stalls.
 

Josh378

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,538
Get poop spray or flush as you poop. Please do this when you are using public restrooms.