Ted Cruz says Space Force is necessary to prevent space pirates

Hexa

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,180
I'm not exactly sure what exactly a Space Force could do to prevent this, but the CIA has stolen satellites before. I'd assume preventing others from stealing ours is a fairly reasonable concern. Though once again not sure how a Space Force could prevent this.
 

Freezasaurus

Member
Oct 25, 2017
27,771
I'm not exactly sure what exactly a Space Force could do to prevent this, but the CIA has stolen satellites before. I'd assume preventing others from stealing ours is a fairly reasonable concern. Though once again not sure how a Space Force could prevent this.
Obviously they would use the lasers on their spaceships and pew-pew-pew the bad guys.
 

SoH

Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,328
"Sir, we really want more defense contracts but we already have enough bombs, tanks, and jets to annihilate anyone ten times over. What do you propose?"

 

Psyborg

Member
Aug 6, 2018
294
Samus got us covered Ted, don't worry.

You know, If the government wanted to admit the existence of aliens without causing too much panic, having Trump announce it would be the best way to do it.

The portion of the country that would actually believe him already believe a bunch of horsehit anyways and the rest of us would just ignore it as another incoherent rambling episode.
 

Atlagev

Member
Oct 27, 2017
583
Crap, all the Harlock jokes have already been made...

Still never a bad time to post this, though.

 

Sean

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,478
Longview
Alright, so what contractors are Trump and Ted Cruz related to that would have trillions of dollars pointlessly pumped into them for this?

Pure fucking lunacy aside, that's the only reason for this to be a thing.
 

Akira86

Member
Oct 25, 2017
10,518
All we need is a base at one of the Lagrange points and a friendly nation to allow us to launch and land planetside, and our space pirate operation is a go.
 

Mechaplum

Member
Oct 26, 2017
6,710
So Space Pirate is the next bogeyman? Really wished he said "communist space pirates" because that would be amazing.
 

op_ivy

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,745
OK, ive been drinking, but bare with me...

imagine aliens were real and our government has been keeping them a secret for the public for some time. How would Trump and the Trump administration react?


thats right - SPACE FORCE.
 

Amalthea

Member
Dec 22, 2017
1,963
The only positive thing about the downward spiral of the GOP is that at some point they'll become so dumb that they simply loose the ability to speak human language.

Congress 2030: Rep. Blurb Graaahh III (R-AL): "Urghhl, muooh, urrrth,... rerrrr!" *starts to drool uncontrollably over the mic*
 

Forerunner

The Fallen
Oct 30, 2017
5,961
San Diego
OK, ive been drinking, but bare with me...

imagine aliens were real and our government has been keeping them a secret for the public for some time. How would Trump and the Trump administration react?


thats right - SPACE FORCE.
There is already a conspiracy theory about this. They would stage a false flag operation that looks like an alien invasion, so that way the military industrial complex grows even more since we would need more advance weapons to combat them.