The first Pirates of the Caribbean film was the last great adventure/swashbuckling film


Oct 25, 2017
Now I want to rewatch this. Saw it so many times as a kid, knew damn near every line. I haven't seen Tintin, Lone Ranger or Master & Commander. Though the latter certainly feels like a different kind of film.


Apr 12, 2018
The story isn't the problem with 5. It's that Jack is completely out of character. A really shitty YouTuber did a video explaining it, but the run down is that, whereas in the first four films, Jack is playing the fool to get the better of his enemies, in the fifth film, he actually just outright is a bumbling idiot.
One of the big problems I have with the Simpsons, same thing happened to Homer, He went from a lovable oaf to just borderline mentally handicapped.

Jeff Albertson

The Fallen
Oct 27, 2017
I love the first it’s perfect, in fact I love all of them even if the latter two are obviously inferior.

Just love the world and Captain Jack, helps that it’s probably my favourite ride of all time too.

Plus that music is perfect


Oct 25, 2017
First one was simply incredible. Jack Sparrow intro was amazing.

Some ten years ago, my screenwriting teacher, who one would assume would outright ignore films like these, described this scene as one of the best introductions to a character he's ever seen.

Without any dialogue or exposition, we fully understand that Jack Sparrow is a complete failure of a pirate and a captain. He's rolling into shore by himself on a little dingy thing that's sinking by the minute, and yet, from his perspective, he's on top of the world, full of optimism and confidence. He's looking ahead, not downwards. And why should he? Because he's also brilliant and lucky and graceful in his own strange way: managing to time the boat's sinking perfectly with stepping onto the dock, already thinking of his next plan to get him out of this mess.

He's simultaneously a loser who can't do anything right and the greatest pirate to ever live, all communicated and summarised in a one minute scene before the man even starts talking. And that's the tension the film makes you ask throughout. Is he "the worst pirate I've ever heard of" or "without a doubt the best pirate I've ever seen"? Greeeeaaat screenwriting.
Oct 26, 2017
Has anyone made a fan edit out of 2 and 3 yet by combining and gutting them? There is a great movie between them, but it is bloated as fuck. And you can't help but feel that bloat comes from them deciding to make the sequel into 2 movies.


The Fallen
Oct 25, 2017
I loved all three with the first being my favorite of course. I don't like what was done to Jack in the later movies which is the reason for my dislike of them.


Oct 27, 2017
Loved the first and second. Really enjoyed the arc for the soldier turned rogue. Third one... enjoyed it at parts but disappointed a lot too


Oct 25, 2017
I rewatched the original trilogy in the last few days and I'm going to have to go with the original being my least favorite of the three.

All of them are bloated but only the first one truly feels like it goes in circles(they reach the Isla de Muerta at the half way point and the film just goes in a circle until we are back there again for the finish) and the original while still having a lot of fun action, it doesn't hold a candle to the greatness Verbinski brings to the two sequels.

Dead Man's Chest is definitely the more solid of the two latter films but I am so on board with the grandeur and spectacle and the general going-for-broke quality of At World's End. That movie is more impressive than what the supposed blockbusters are bringing today.

Random Thoughts:
  • As a youngin' Jack Sparrow was the coolest, now I see Elizabeth Swann for the greatness that she is.
  • The special effects(particularly in Black Pearl) clearly don't wow as they used to but it is still very impressive what they pulled off.
  • Davey Jones is still absurdly effective on the other hand.
  • The films, while not gorey, are way more gruesome and violent than I remember. Sexual as well.
  • It is hard to imagine these getting made(content-wise) by Disney these days. While the threat of it never has teeth or is ever taken seriously, Elizabeth is in constant sexual peril in the first film. The word "Rape" is used at one point(in describing what pirates do, i.e. 'rape and pillage'). The gruesomeness grows in the sequels(you see a guy getting his eye eaten by a bird in Dead Man's Chest, a child is hung to death in the opening scene of At World's End), you have the cannibal islanders(bonus points for tropey racism). At World's End feels like it was made with no studio interference or even oversight, something like the sequence with Jack going mad in the Locker seems like it would be impossible to get past the suits in this day and age.
  • Naomi Harris grows 50 feet tall and then transmogrifies into a mass of do people not love that movie?!

I intend to watch the other two at some point soon. I remember On Stranger Tides being a massive disappointment, with the lack of Verbinski felt all over the place, I distinctly recall watching the sequence with the seesawing ship and being flabbergasted at just how much it wasn't working(Verbinski would've killed that bit). And I've never seen Dead Men Tell No Tales, so that'll be an experience
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Oct 27, 2017
5 is pretty alright, actually. Better than 4.

I still remember seeing the end of 2 in the theater, kinda cheesy but also kinda cool.

The first movie is pretty well done though, for sure.

I also recommend Lego Pirates of the Caribbean on PC or backwards-compatible console.


Oct 28, 2017
I loved pirates 1, but its special effects has kinda aged rewatching it on Disney + but it does have the best pace, and highly rewatchable and depp and everyone feel like they're on their A game

pirates 2 - davy jones was the best part of this movie. AMAZING cg that still holds up. Other wise was just a rollercoaster ride that ended abrutly, needed more story

pirates 3 -...again the CG is amazing, the set pieces jaw dropping @ the story. i had to rewatch this like 3-4 times to even understand the whole thing. sooo convulated lol but once i understood everything its pretty enjoyable


Fuck on stranger tides, what a meh movie. the mermaid battle scene was so damn dark, i couldn't see shit.

Pirates 5... last one made depp who was one of my favorite characters into such a dumb joke that i cringe watching this movie


Nov 1, 2017
Idk valerian was kind of fun

But srsly The black pearl was good
Valerian was garbage and had about twice as many scenes/locations as it needed.

Also I subscribe to the theory that if Valerian and Passengers had switched stars (DeHaan/Delevingne with Pratt/Lawrence) they would both be much better movies.

Valerian should have had the charismatic and athletic action movie stars and Passengers should have had the brooding and creepy gaunt runway model types.


Oct 25, 2017
Long Island
One is the perfect adventure movie, from Jack barely landing in port, the deserted island scene with the missing rum and finally capping it all off with this, how do you not cheer for Captain Jack



Oct 26, 2017
First one was simply incredible. Jack Sparrow intro was amazing.

This intro is incredible, but it always bothered me that he sticks his right foot out to step onto the dock in one shot, then actually steps onto the dock with his left foot in the next shot. It's a completely trivial continuity error but my dumb brain notices it every damn time.
Oct 25, 2017
I felt it was worse than the 4th one at times...
Nah, 4's biggest sin is that its so boring and bland.... and yet was the most expensive by far.
Jack is boring
Barbosa is boring till the end
Blackbeard is completely wasted
Mermaid scene is literally the only element I love

In 5 Jack kinda sucks but everything else is average at worst but had good sequences and lore again.


Nov 2, 2017
You (like everybody else) are sleeping on The Lone Ranger, OP.

If you loved Pirates, Verbinski (and Zimmer) brings the same energy and more in The Lone Ranger. The last 15 minutes is perhaps the most enjoyable action set piece of the past decade.

The film is also surprisingly violent for a Disney film.
I am shocked, SHOCKED you didn't come in here with your usual staning for Jon Carter of Mars.


Oct 25, 2017
Providence / Boston
I felt it was worse than the 4th one at times...
I legitimately can't understand this opinion. I thought 5 was better in every single way and I put it above the third as well.

It's certainly flawed but it wasn't a convoluted mess like 3 and it at least had a more interesting story than 4. I liked the new characters for the most part and the villain was more memorable than 4.


Oct 27, 2017
Dead Man's Chest is my favorite by far, but I enjoy all of them to an extent.
The first one is probably one of my least favorites because the story just seems kind of...pointless?

You've got a bunch of undead pirates trying to reclaim all of the pieces of gold from a cursed treasure so they can become human again, and for some reason people are trying to prevent this rather than aid them (gotta keep those immortal pirates around, eh!?), and sure enough once the curse is lifted and it turns out they're mortal again, Barbossa dies and the rest of his crew gives up and surrenders to the Royal Navy.

I mean, like, WTF!?