ACO coming on that stream was amazing. It warms my weary heart to see such an amazing event come together
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TransEra |ERA1| We're People, Okay?
- Thread starter SweetNicole
- Start date
- OT
I watch the latest few and I was in tears the entire time.
Words can't describe how happy I was watching that stream.
Trans youth suffer so much and there is nothing we can do about if the parents are transphobic. It's so heartbreaking.
I frequently chat with 2 trans teens, but that's all I can do for them.
Which is why this was such an important event. Everyone should know about the shit we, but especially the very young ones, have to endure.
As soon as I get the letter, really. Everything else is in place for me to make the change.
To be sure about being trans and being barred from the proper treatment by transphobic parents must be soul shattering.
I hope it happens less and less as time goes on and it's awesome that you are doing something to directly help.
I'm just a girl trying her best.
Anyway, I'm pretty sure I'm actually straight now. I will think about it a bit more, but if this doesn't change, I have a very serious relationship issue to say the least.
Feels like I'm betraying her after she was so supportive.
No idea how I'm supposed to find a partner half as good as her ever again.
Being a straight woman makes being with another woman kind of hard. But it's the same for her?
Maybe it's best to give an honest try to still make it work while being open about you being straight too?
I guess being open and honest is all that can be done. I wish there was more. Depending on how you both feel about it you can still be important parts of each others lifes even if a romantic relationship is not possible anymore.
Being trans generally sucks for most people, but if you weren't trans you wouldn't be who you are today. Which can be good or bad depending on if you like yourself. Self-love can be hard, but it's an important step on the road to happiness.
This is just a general comment and not directed towards anyone in particular. Being positive helps me feel better about life.
This is just a general comment and not directed towards anyone in particular. Being positive helps me feel better about life.
We are now 2 straight girls in a gay relationship. Pretty sure this isn't going to work. This is the only relationship I ever had and it lasted for 3.5 years, but I guess it just isn't meant to be.
I will talk to her about it soon enough, but I want some more time to think about it (just in case) and she also isn't in a good mood.
Plus, I'm in no hurry to be single.
I feel so bad about this. She was so happy that we could see us again more frequently and now this.
Told her that this could happen some time ago and she was very understanding, so I hope we can stay friends at least.
Pre Surgery electrolysis is horrible. When I am told that it is over for good, I will probably cry.
I finally had my appointment at court for the ID stuff. So the good news is I will likely not have to go to another unless something goess terribly wrong.
The bad news is he didn't want to appoint my therapist for one of the two required expert opnions because according to him that would be biased. Ah well. At least the process keeps going on.
The bad news is he didn't want to appoint my therapist for one of the two required expert opnions because according to him that would be biased. Ah well. At least the process keeps going on.
Still haven't talked to my gf. It was recommended to me to wait a bit longer since bisexuality can come in waves.
I also want to talk to my therapist about it first.
Tomorrow my mom will come with me to my therapist appointment and I'm going to convince her to support me.
I also going to confess that I'm on hormones for 3 months as well as my other plans.
On the posstiv side I started professional voice training and it's surprisingly fun.
I also want to talk to my therapist about it first.
Tomorrow my mom will come with me to my therapist appointment and I'm going to convince her to support me.
I also going to confess that I'm on hormones for 3 months as well as my other plans.
On the posstiv side I started professional voice training and it's surprisingly fun.
I hope that appointment goes well. How did your mom react so far?
I also have been thinking about professional voice training so maybe I should give it a shot too.
Hi there. I'm a 34-year-old transwoman from the USA. I've been on HRT for about 10 months now, and I'm out in pretty much everywhere aside from work, and working on getting my identity and gender marker updated.
I tend to lurk a lot, and I generally don't talk much, but it's nice to meet all of you!
I tend to lurk a lot, and I generally don't talk much, but it's nice to meet all of you!
Good luck when you come out at work. I recently came out, and it went sooooooo much better than I ever thought it would. And welcome to the club. Dues are paid every month. We have pizza parties when we get enough money.
Welcome
They mostly hang out in the discord. You should pm one of the thread mods for a link if interested.
Thanks for the welcome.
I'm currently working with HR for the final coming-out date, and it's looking like start of March. I'm genuinely looking forward to it.
Also, a huge thanks for the heads-up regarding the Discord. I'll send a message to one of the mods today.
I'm currently working with HR for the final coming-out date, and it's looking like start of March. I'm genuinely looking forward to it.
Also, a huge thanks for the heads-up regarding the Discord. I'll send a message to one of the mods today.
Maturra Hi Maturra! I hope to see you on the discord.
I highly recommanded voice training if you can find someone who has experince it girls like us.
It was very stressful, but it went really well.
I highly recommanded voice training if you can find someone who has experince it girls like us.
Yeah, there is someone in Munich and I already made some appointments. Your comment kind of kicked me into gear for that so thanks.
I am also glad to hear it went well with your mom.
Are you my double.
No wait I'm mostly only out online and at home. Welcome!
After just over a year of waiting and jumping through the mandatory gatekeeping hoops, I finally picked up my first prescription of Estradiol and Cypro yesterday. Feels so good to finally get to start HRT.
Congrats :) It sucks that you had to wait a year. Gatekeeping is awful :(
Thanks y'all! It's pretty satisfying, yeah :) I've been doing a bit of research, my endo prescribed me 50mg of cypro/daily, and it seems the consensus is that it's a bit high. However my main concern is genital function. I have no interest in SRS, I want to keep things working down there. Does a lower dose of cypro, and thus a slightly higher T level, make it more likely to keep functioning? I would assume so, yeah? This is probably a bit over everyone's pay grade, but hey, maybe someone here knows a lot!
I'm unsure, but as a note, Estrogen itself will inhibit function down there. I can't take sipro, and my T is very, very low, just with estrogen. Course, mine was about half of what you'd expect, before I started. If you want to keep functioning down there, I would talk to your doctor about not taking sipro till you get a feel for where your T levels are after taking estrogen for a while.
Started with 10mg cypro per day. And only after taking estrogen for a few weeks.
My experience with that was that it made me pretty tired even at that dose before I got used to it. I am now at 15mg. That pretty much obliterated my testosterone values in the blood test.
My testosterone was on the lower end of the male range when I began though. So not sure if that makes any difference.
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Congrats girl!
The physical changes will take time, but the mental ones will hit you pretty soon.
You probably want to substitute B12, otherwise Cypro might make you depressed.
I started with 10 now I'm down to 5,because my T level was below that of cis women. 50 a day seems very high, but maybe your default T level is just that high?
What does that mean? My endo didn't say anything about that.
I read that 50mg is a pretty standard dose. It's the smallest dose the pills come in I think.
50mg is a bit on the higher side. I know that some people do end up taking half or a quarter of that by cutting the pills, but I would really recommend just observing how things go for a bit and then talking to your doctor about how you feel.
I'll have my first professional voice training session on Tuesday. I wonder how it will go and I am kind of excited.
The doctor I went to to get the referal for it asked me if I wanted my voice to be more masculine or feminine. Why would I want my voice to be more masculine? That wouldn't make much sense.
The doctor I went to to get the referal for it asked me if I wanted my voice to be more masculine or feminine. Why would I want my voice to be more masculine? That wouldn't make much sense.
It's possible they've been asked to not assume, and to ask the person.
I was just a bit surprised. That doctor was not specialised or particulary versed in trans issues so I was happy I got the referal at all.
I understand. Congrats on the referal. I'd love to do vocal training, but it's out of my price range, alas.
For me it's more a time issue. As far as I am aware it's something you want to do weekly and i have to travel about 2 hours to Munich for the nearest place with experience.
Hard to pull off on a work day so I'll have to figure something out with my employer.
Ahh, yeah, that would be difficult. Good luck working things out.
Thank you. There will be a way. Worst case is that I'd have to wait while I look for a job that allows me to have the room to do this.
I'd also like to make sure that what I already did with my voice on my own is not damaging.
I would imagine it's hard to damage your voice too much unless you're screaming at the top of your lungs, or just trying to do something that's completely outside your range. But either way, good luck.
So I went to the voice training session today and she told me my voice is mostly fine and just needs minor adjustments. So I don't have to go weekly and I don't have to find some solution with my employer.
We can probably do fine with just having appointments while I am in Munich already for the other trans related things I do there.
We can probably do fine with just having appointments while I am in Munich already for the other trans related things I do there.
Hey, so I've recently begun to realise that there's a fair chance that I am transgender. I don't know yet, and I've been flip-flopping between "I am" and "I'm not," these past few days and, damn, I just don't know. There have been so many times in my life where I think (I'm nowhere near qualified to say that they are) I've exhibited some form of trans behaviour or reacted to something in a way that could potentially make sense for a pre-transition trans-person, stuff like:
- Only ever wanting to play as female characters in games that give you the choice (I remember dropping Eve: Valkyria on PSVR simply because there was no way for me to change gender after I had accidentally picked the male body)
- Instantly being dismissive of any remarks from family/friends that "I'd make a good rugby player," because it reminded me of my shitty body
- Literally saying "I wish I were born a girl," to my mum (in a joking fashion during a conversation about shaving, but deep down I meant it)
- Never feeling any desire to take care of my male body
- Never wanting to look in mirrors, take selfies or have pictures taken of me
Those and so many more I can't even remember that clearly make it so that I can't deny that something is there. However I also don't feel like I 'need' to transition, and the uncertainty of it all (whether my family will accept me if I am trans, whether my 'rugby player' frame will make passing impossible, my voice...) just terrifies me.
Just... fuck, I don't know. To be perfectly honest I kinda wish that I would have had these thoughts a little later than now as they're definitely distracting me from University work lol. Sorry to put all this out here like this but I just wanted a place to vent and had nowhere else to put all this out into words.
- Only ever wanting to play as female characters in games that give you the choice (I remember dropping Eve: Valkyria on PSVR simply because there was no way for me to change gender after I had accidentally picked the male body)
- Instantly being dismissive of any remarks from family/friends that "I'd make a good rugby player," because it reminded me of my shitty body
- Literally saying "I wish I were born a girl," to my mum (in a joking fashion during a conversation about shaving, but deep down I meant it)
- Never feeling any desire to take care of my male body
- Never wanting to look in mirrors, take selfies or have pictures taken of me
Those and so many more I can't even remember that clearly make it so that I can't deny that something is there. However I also don't feel like I 'need' to transition, and the uncertainty of it all (whether my family will accept me if I am trans, whether my 'rugby player' frame will make passing impossible, my voice...) just terrifies me.
Just... fuck, I don't know. To be perfectly honest I kinda wish that I would have had these thoughts a little later than now as they're definitely distracting me from University work lol. Sorry to put all this out here like this but I just wanted a place to vent and had nowhere else to put all this out into words.
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Hi Plum
Some aspects of your story match my own but, I would recommend seeking out a qualified therapist in your area to get a formal assessment.
They will be a big help in moving forward in a number of areas, including hormones and surgeries if that is something you choose to do.
I think most trans individuals fear they won't pass but hormones are very effective and what you see now won't be what you see in 2 years. I also have wider shoulders but so do many other CIS women. A lot of passing comes down to being comfortable in your own skin.
I wish you luck on your journey
Hi, thank you for replying!
Thank you, to be honest I knew that a therapist would be my best course of action but seeing it said by someone else definitely makes it clear that it's something I should do. I'll look into what my University offers first because, sadly, it seems that the NHS has a poor track record with timeliness when it comes to trans issues (and mental health in general). Even if all they do is confirm what my mind's already telling me I reckon it'll help me greatly in coming to terms with what I 'am' (for lack of a better term).
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I've finally made the big step, and went full-time. I spent much of Monday just a bundle of nerves, before returning to work on Tuesday. They've already updated pretty much everything, and things are finally getting to, well... "normal." It feels great to be out everywhere now, but it still doesn't feel "real" yet.
Like... part of me still expects to be going home to change back into the old guy clothes, wash my face, and style my hair into that boring old style... but it's not happening. I'm going into work, wearing my skirt, blouse, and heels. And, well... I'm just kind of wondering when I'll wake up from all of this.
Still, I'm glad to finally be "me."
Like... part of me still expects to be going home to change back into the old guy clothes, wash my face, and style my hair into that boring old style... but it's not happening. I'm going into work, wearing my skirt, blouse, and heels. And, well... I'm just kind of wondering when I'll wake up from all of this.
Still, I'm glad to finally be "me."
From someone who's literally just started figuring all this stuff out, well done! Of course being in the position I am I have no authority to comment directly on how you must feel but I have definitely experienced that feeling of "this isn't real," after major changes in my life (finishing school, family/pet deaths and, most recently, the realisation that I might be trans myself). The brain is weird like that haha
Those are all things that can be indicative of trans-ness and most of them ring true for me. That's not to say that everyone who fits some or even all of those criteria must be trans, but if you're seriously considering the possibility that you are, that in and of itself is another piece of evidence. Ultimately, it's up to you to decide if the label of trans adequately describes your experience, but I'll second the recommendation to see a therapist to be able to talk about things with. In any event, best of luck with whatever lies ahead of you! I'm glad you felt able to reach out on here; I know that bringing it up can be an intimidating prospect.
Congratulations! :D I hope that continues to go well for you.
I'm deliberately not taking any in-person classes this semester (the program has no restrictions on how many online versus in-person classes you select) since I'm still terrible at presenting, but I hope to get back on campus more regularly in the fall. I'm hopefully starting HRT next week--just waiting for the labs to get back--and I'm gonna try to look into laser hair removal for my face as that's the most dysphoric thing for me currently. I think that as those begin to have visible effects it will be easier to try other things like dressing more femininely, as opposed to the androgynous look I've been in for most of the past five or six months.
Thank you for the kind response! That is a good point about the fact that I'm even considering it, I didn't really think of it that way. I've already begun looking to my options where I live. There are many things I want/need to do once I've finished University (learn to drive, find a job, sort out my Lego collection...) so I guess "figure out who I am" can now be added to the list lol
As for me feeling comfortable to post this here, I guess it's because Era is an 'anonymous' service that isn't also completely open to anyone in the way Reddit, Facebook, etc are. There's no fear of being outed but there's also no fear random shitty comments and the 3-word meaningless platitudes I might have received elsewhere. I also felt like I needed to put those feelings into words in a place that I feel was at least some part of my identity, and I spend enough time here that Era fit the bill well.
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Thank you! ^^ I wish you the very best in your transition. All I can really say is to take all the time you need. This is your journey, so don't let anyone push you to do otherwise.
A lot if this sounds like you could be trans at least. And cis people usually don't worry about that kind of stuff.
You could try to dip your feet into presenting as a woman maybe? Since you posted in here it's likely no one in your real life connects your account here to you. So if you want you can change your account here to "female". Or maybe just us in here in this thread can view you as a woman.
If you don't want to that's fine as well and doesn't change if you are trans or not. That is ultimately always for you to decide.