When I was giving T a fair shake before giving up on that route, I'd still be given bandages, and there'd typically be a spot of blood on them. I'm guessing as long as all you get is the little bit of blood you're fine.
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TransEra |ERA1| We're People, Okay?
- Thread starter SweetNicole
- Start date
- OT
I put that thread up I mentioned earlier - https://www.resetera.com/threads/march-31st-international-transgender-day-of-visibility.33064/ .
I hope you all appreciate it, and perhaps even drop by to contribute or even just say hi. <3
I hope you all appreciate it, and perhaps even drop by to contribute or even just say hi. <3
Nah, everyone I have met at Susan's place has been nice and pleasant to talk to. Unfortunately it is also a bit on the inactive side as usually only a few 100 members are active. Also, thank you for the compliment! I would honestly be surprised if there was still an active LGBT community on Neogaf due to the situation with the owner and such. Note: I am not ignoring anyone's reply to my comment, as it is just that I do not know how to do the multiple quote thing.
If it was not for my social anxiety then I would join the discord, but thanks for the offer!
Oh, yeah, there isn't really anymore. I meant this is more active than transgaf was before The Incident.
Well, when I do go there by accident or intent I'd see the LGBT thread getting some posts. The trans thread though? That died on that day.
Though it was starting to get a bit unwelcoming anyway with some key members being lost for poor reasons.
Hiya everyone. :)
Was a lurker for the most part on GAF (and still am for the most part here, mainly been because I've had back-to-back-to-back projects at work that are taking up most of my time x_x), but I frequented the thread there and also did so here.
MtF, although currently pre-everything ATM. Saw the post earlier about the Discord server, I'll send out a PM about that later, but wanted to post in here first.
Was a lurker for the most part on GAF (and still am for the most part here, mainly been because I've had back-to-back-to-back projects at work that are taking up most of my time x_x), but I frequented the thread there and also did so here.
MtF, although currently pre-everything ATM. Saw the post earlier about the Discord server, I'll send out a PM about that later, but wanted to post in here first.
Oh wow it is? That is interesting, and I wonder why that is?
I dont know where to post this but this is something I want to get of my chest lately.
I'm identify as a gay. I had bf before but the thing is I dont enjoy gay sex so they come and go quickly. Ever since I was a kid I always imagine myself as a girl with my crushes. Have sex dream with a man as a woman.
I think about sex change, read a little but never dare to serious consider it. From what I know the operation and treatment are costy enough to buy a house in Vietnam and thats what I do right now: saving enough to buy my own house. I cant even imagine what my family would think and they dont talk to me that much since I came out. I'm in my 30s is it too late? And I probably lose my job by then. Unless I win the lottery I will never have the courage to do it and its depressing just to think of it.
I'm pretty plain dont interested in cross dressing, like my body well enough. But all the time I wish I was born as a woman.
I'm identify as a gay. I had bf before but the thing is I dont enjoy gay sex so they come and go quickly. Ever since I was a kid I always imagine myself as a girl with my crushes. Have sex dream with a man as a woman.
I think about sex change, read a little but never dare to serious consider it. From what I know the operation and treatment are costy enough to buy a house in Vietnam and thats what I do right now: saving enough to buy my own house. I cant even imagine what my family would think and they dont talk to me that much since I came out. I'm in my 30s is it too late? And I probably lose my job by then. Unless I win the lottery I will never have the courage to do it and its depressing just to think of it.
I'm pretty plain dont interested in cross dressing, like my body well enough. But all the time I wish I was born as a woman.
That last part makes it seem pretty cut and dry to me that you're trans. Cis people don't feel that way persistently. Maybe try putting on some girl clothes or something. Explore the feelings, talk through it with trans folks online maybe. You can join our discord if you PM one of the mods in this thread. It's okay to be scared but 30 is not too late. I'm 30 and I realized I was trans a few months ago and it's improved my quality of life significantly.
You sure sound trans to me, but only you can truely know that. Sounds like you are more affarid of discrimination than anything else.
I found this quiz pretty helpful when I was questioning my gender:
http://www.gotoquiz.com/are_you_transgender_mtf
Don't be affraid to do it multiple times after you had more time to think about it.
Not idea how it works in Vietnam, in the usa the pills aren't very expensive. However, you are right the operations.
The things is, you don't need to go all the way. Hormones alone is enough for some trans people.
It's not uncommon to live a double live, becuase many of us are affarid to lose their job.
From what I heard, the second coming out usually is less of a big deal.
I just recently came out and started to transition. And even with some problems that came with that I have never felt better about myself.
And I was very much convinced it would never work out for the longest time.
You might not have been born in the proper body but if you wish to be a woman you probably already are one.
Thank you guy for all the advice. Here the thought that I dont even share with my gay best friend.
The operation is expensive because I need to fly to another country to do it. I dont even know we can do it with pill, its nice to hear.
Sometime I use the Faceapp to see what I look like as a woman. I like it a lot:)
The operation is expensive because I need to fly to another country to do it. I dont even know we can do it with pill, its nice to hear.
Sometime I use the Faceapp to see what I look like as a woman. I like it a lot:)
When during the injection cycle is it best to get bloodwork done?
I'll be getting tests done again when I see my endo in a few weeks and I want to know what's the best time to do it to ensure the most accurate results? Halfway through the cycle to test for average levels or the day before my next shot to test for trough levels?
I'll be getting tests done again when I see my endo in a few weeks and I want to know what's the best time to do it to ensure the most accurate results? Halfway through the cycle to test for average levels or the day before my next shot to test for trough levels?
My doctor has me do blood tests the day before I do my shot for trough levels. I actually had to move my injection date around a bit as her availability for clinic hours is limited.
Welcome Helen! Its good to see you here.
Regards,
A cis man (I hope i am doing this right).
Either way, looking at the title of the topic, and i instantly got a audible companion for this thread that voices out the struggles trans people face quite apt. Before i post the song, perhaps one can look at the lyrics and see if if its fitting? There is one line in that i don't think relates (Those Hardfaced Queens of misadventure) aswell as a few others but the general tone of the song and the message it conveys, i instantly had to think of this thread, but i feel the rest sounds apt. Its a beautiful song too, by the way:
I haven't really messed with makeup too much myself, just make sure you watch some videos on how to do it and you'll be fine. Its okay to mess up at first, the goal is just to learn and get better!
I'm 5 months into HRT and I haven't touched makeup either outside of the concealer and foundation I've been using for years.
I'm too terrified of looking like a drag queen. I'd rather look 100% male than some kind of caricature.
I'm too terrified of looking like a drag queen. I'd rather look 100% male than some kind of caricature.
You can do it from the safety of your own home for a while to really practice and make sure you have it down. And if you need advice on how you look, you can always feel free to ask us!
Try it and once you are happy enough with it share some selfies with other transgender persons. They won't judge you.
Well then, i guess my little audible epiphany was not so great after all :/. Just felt like sharing it and asking if people could relate to the lyrics (were fitting, sort to say).
Still practicing my voice, but when I listen to it, I feel like instead of a woman I sound more like this:
:/
:/
It can be really hard to judge your voice yourself. Especially if it is engrained in your head as a male voice.
But even if you have a deep voice or it doesn't sound quite right at the moment there are plenty of women who started like that and have a great voices now.
No, it just means you do not care about what others think, which is great! Just do what makes you happy you know? Well I mean, if your wife does not know then I suppose it would be quite the surprise. Hey, I am sure you look great though!
Hmm...I do not believe this comment is helpful, but I hope it is!
Hi all. I have been lurking for a long time on the new site since the incident, but haven't really posted since. Posted a few times on the old site, but nothing really consistent or substantial. Things haven't really changed on my end either, but its still a work in progress. 27, pre-HRT trans girl. Hoping to get the ball rolling soon however.
Not at all, in fact I think that's the best way to get used to presenting: just doing it. Doesn't matter if you think you don't pass 100% or whatever - if you're waiting for that day to present, you're going to be frustrated and unhappy.
OTOH, you have people like me who will probably never present or socially transition.
I just hope that years of HRT + lots of surgery will be enough to waive Chett/Suporn's RLE requirements if and when I decide I want GCS. But that would be several years away anyways as there's like 4 or 5 different surgeries i would prioritize getting first.
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I got ma'med today at the drive through.
Granted, my face was completely obscured by my hair from her vantage point, but still, i'll take it. :)
Granted, my face was completely obscured by my hair from her vantage point, but still, i'll take it. :)
Hi. I'm non-binary, trans... something. From birth, everybody said I was a girl/woman, but that never felt right. About the only thing that felt right was wearing skirts because skirts are awesome. When I got into tech, I thought I wanted to be a man, and even my internalized view of myself was as a man; but in the end, this did not fit either. In the end, I was rejected by most women because I had a romantic attraction to women and/or was too male (lack of make-up, lack of clothing sense, programmer); and I was rejected by most men because I had a romantic attraction to men and/or was too female (based on my unfortunately-for-dysphoria boobs and wearing of skirts).
People say maybe I'm genderfluid, but that's not right either. I don't ever think of myself as a woman or as a man anymore, and definitely not sometimes one/sometimes the other. I don't feel like I'm even in that "male to female" spectrum. I feel completely apart from that. I think the closest is probably that I identify as agender? But more closely is that I identify as a gender, it's just that it only has me in it. Sound selfish of me, I think.
My gender ambiguity, or maybe my "mehness" about gender, even expresses itself in my choice of pronouns. I've tried many pronouns, but none fit. Only "aj", which needs no change despite its grammatical usage, works. I gave up looking for other options after exhausting like 20?
I hoped that being gender-meh would mean maybe the dysphoria wasn't real, but unfortunately it is. It's just my boobs though. Everything else is fine. My boobs are what folks have called "well-endowed" and they cannot be bound. It's really not fair. The best I can do is not to wear bras and treat them as "man boobs" which is slightly better to think about, even though I don't identify as a man. I cannot afford top surgery.
Anyways that's where I am.
People say maybe I'm genderfluid, but that's not right either. I don't ever think of myself as a woman or as a man anymore, and definitely not sometimes one/sometimes the other. I don't feel like I'm even in that "male to female" spectrum. I feel completely apart from that. I think the closest is probably that I identify as agender? But more closely is that I identify as a gender, it's just that it only has me in it. Sound selfish of me, I think.
My gender ambiguity, or maybe my "mehness" about gender, even expresses itself in my choice of pronouns. I've tried many pronouns, but none fit. Only "aj", which needs no change despite its grammatical usage, works. I gave up looking for other options after exhausting like 20?
I hoped that being gender-meh would mean maybe the dysphoria wasn't real, but unfortunately it is. It's just my boobs though. Everything else is fine. My boobs are what folks have called "well-endowed" and they cannot be bound. It's really not fair. The best I can do is not to wear bras and treat them as "man boobs" which is slightly better to think about, even though I don't identify as a man. I cannot afford top surgery.
Anyways that's where I am.
Hello! Welcome to the community! Its nice to see you over here as well!
I'm sorry to hear that you're having a rough time with dysphoria. Is the issue with the size of them, or is it they they exist at all? I know that its a huge pain in the ass to try and get anything top related covered by insurance, and I really wish our insurance systems were better about this kind of thing.
Hi, thanks!
For me it's that they exist at all. It was much worse when I was wearing a bra, and despite my cis woman acquaintances insisting that bras are necessary so that "boobs don't sag and stay perky" (which I'm not convinced is true), I started to go without a bra despite the size of them boobs. And I felt *better*, way way way way better. Not perfect 'cause of the boobs still being there, but it's like they mattered less.
Afterwards one of my cis woman acquaintances who insisted upon calling herself my friend tried to tell me I "looked like Despair" (the naked fat character from Gaiman's Sandman, a corpus of works I have HUGE FUCKING PROBLEMS WITH) and that surely I don't want to look ugly right?
What the hell was/is wrong with her. She was very much not into women. Why did me looking pretty matter at all. Why did I run into cis women who fussed over my "lack of femininity" and forced me to go through horrible makeovers to get social acceptance. It all made me feel worse and miserable and they did not seem to care that it did so; also they spent my own money to do this to me. They treated me like a doll.
Like I'm pretty sure they just made my dysphoria worse.
I live in a town where I'm not allowed to get a short haircut, and where I'm not allowed to shop for men's clothing unless I have a person with me who is very stereotypical "dude." Well, I'm allowed to, I just get bullied about not being a proper woman. And I feel like I cannot explain to people anymore why that doesn't matter a shit to me.
Anyways it just occurred to me that my best friend is also "meh" on the gender thing although in a different way. We sometimes make fun of the hangups that cis people get into when they run into someone who does not express their gender in an approved manner. It helps a bit but I hate living where I am.
Hi, nice to meet you!
I'm kind of similar to you (AFAB but it doesn't fit) and kind of different (I think I identify with gender a bit more...I'm just more male some days and more female others). None of my friends or family know.
Anyway, I don't have much advice for you but you're not alone! If you lived near me, I'd take you shopping and we could peruse the men's section to our heart's desires <3
So, I found a therapist who has an open spot so if that goes well I am about 6 months away from hormone therapy. I mean I wish that was sooner but at least it skips the usual 6 month wait time to get a place here.
I also went to work in a skirt today and that was great. :)
I also went to work in a skirt today and that was great. :)
I'm contemplating detransition, It would be a rather simple affair as it would only constitute stopping HRT. I haven't socially transitioned and the only people I'm out to are my immediate family.
I don't doubt that I'm Trans or that I suffer from horrendous gender dysphoria, but its only been worse during the 5 months I've been on E. My rumination is worse than ever, I basically cry myself to sleep every night, and I'm barely functioning anymore. I feel like prior to starting I had a better handle on things, I was still completely miserable but it was easier to bury and repress things back before I started HRT.
I would miss the few changes that I have gotten (softer skin, less greasy hair, no body odor, slower body hair growth, etc.) and it would make the $2500 I paid for laser (yes I know I way overpaid shut up) a waste. The fear of MPB would also probably cause me more anxiety and would be absolutely devastating if and when I actually do lose my hair. But I feel that all may be worth it if I can get my mental state back to where it was before.
I don't doubt that I'm Trans or that I suffer from horrendous gender dysphoria, but its only been worse during the 5 months I've been on E. My rumination is worse than ever, I basically cry myself to sleep every night, and I'm barely functioning anymore. I feel like prior to starting I had a better handle on things, I was still completely miserable but it was easier to bury and repress things back before I started HRT.
I would miss the few changes that I have gotten (softer skin, less greasy hair, no body odor, slower body hair growth, etc.) and it would make the $2500 I paid for laser (yes I know I way overpaid shut up) a waste. The fear of MPB would also probably cause me more anxiety and would be absolutely devastating if and when I actually do lose my hair. But I feel that all may be worth it if I can get my mental state back to where it was before.
I know we've talked about this before, but I want to reiterate. Detransitioning is a terrible idea when you know that you're trans. Your dysphoria will only get worse as you see the male features become more and more prominent. You need to sit down and really think about why you're considering this, because its not that you were happier before you started to transition. It's because you're scared of going out into the real world as someone who is transgender. That is a perfectly normal fear to have when you have no experience with it, but its not one that's really rooted in the reality that most trans people face. There are essentially 2 ways that would help you to handle this fear and make you see that its not that bad. A : You go out into the world right now presenting and see how it goes. Or B : You take the time to listen to the daily experiences of other transwomen and see that it's not so bad. A is a little more daunting than B, but I'd really recommend that you rejoin the discord to see B. You can even see pictures of people in there that can show you that passing isn't as impossible as you think it is. You don't even have to participate if you don't want to, I just think that being able to be in an environment where you see trans people interacting would really benefit you.
You need to try and focus on the positives that you've seen from your transition so far, and understand the fact that there are plenty of other changes that are on the way. It takes time to sort our all of your dosages, and then on top of that, it takes a lot of time for all the changes to really go through because you're essentially going through a second puberty. I understand your impatience with the changes that you've seen and the fears that you have all too well. Those are experiences that most trans people go through, and that's why I think surrounding yourself with other trans people would be beneficial as well. Its a tough road to try and tackle on your own, and I know I couldn't do it without the support groups that I've built up in the trans communities here.
The issue I'm having is that I think HRT is making my mental health deteriorate even worse than before. Physically, I like the changes, but mentally and emotionally I feel worse than ever.