1. Dragnipur

    Dragnipur
    Banned Member

    Women get hit on all the time and it gets old for them, most men don't so why wouldn't they be?
     
  2. Trojita

    Trojita
    Member

    You think straight men on here are homophobic or something?
     
  3. Omegamon

    Omegamon
    Member

    because homophobia? Yeah, sure men would be flattered being hit by a gay man, sure. Not that gay men would hit them, they pronbably have better taste.
     
  4. Xaszatm

    Xaszatm
    Member

    As someone who isn't a wrestling fan...what am I looking at exactly?
     
  5. Dragnipur

    Dragnipur
    Banned Member

    I don't really get what you're saying, it's okay to be gay
     
  6. Jill Sandwich

    Jill Sandwich
    Member

    Someone with a thigh where his neck should be.
     
  7. excelsiorlef

    excelsiorlef
    Member

    Lance Storm the most charismatic wrestler in the world, and a super duper Canadian


    T'was my way of saying I'm Canadian, post I was replying to was also a wrestling reference
     
  8. Omegamon

    Omegamon
    Member

    of course :)
     
  9. Soran

    Soran
    Member

    jfc why you guys need SO bad to hide your butthurt over what women said in a thread made for women that you resort to make "ironic" joke post that no one asked for? Why are you in this thread in the first place? Walk away if you are gonna get so anal.
     
  10. Dragnipur

    Dragnipur
    Banned Member

    I don't cold approach women, but if someone cold approached me I'd be flattered. Not that hard to understand.
     
  11. Sunster

    Sunster
    Member

    His neck is as thick as a tree trunk...
     
  12. Soran

    Soran
    Member

    Go make your own thread then. This wasn't for you in the first place.
     
  13. I get this kind of thing as a man from both women and gay guys, and I find it irritating and off putting 100% of the time.

    Don't do it. If you're going to approach a stranger, just do it with the intention of having a brief chat and nothing else.
     
  14. jkm23

    jkm23
    Member

    Question: If women ITT have had success with their husbands/bfs with cold-ball-striking, are there any Gay Eranians who can chime in if they followed the same protocol or if it was something slightly different?
     
  15. Dragnipur

    Dragnipur
    Banned Member

    Oh, you're one of those people..
     
  16. Consensual

    Consensual
    Member

    That's a disgrace then, it really shouldn't be like this. Nothing but sympathy for all the women on here (and elsewhere) who have to put up with this stuff time after time.

    It's pretty depressing that this is how it is, even on a place like this.

    I'm not surprised by that, this is the same place where white people were tripping over themselves to defend and explain Michael Scott's racism. They couldn't even call out a fictional racist. Too many people will go to new lengths for just the hypothetical idea of "boys will be boys".

    They're going to think you're talking crazy now, that's an alien concept to some... What next? Treat people like people?!
     
  17. Omegamon

    Omegamon
    Member

    lmao you are sooo upset abou the women in this thread, pathetic
     
  18. weemadarthur

    weemadarthur
    Community Resettler Member

    I love you all.
     
  19. Dragnipur

    Dragnipur
    Banned Member

    I don't contribute to their misery, so my take is perfectly valid
     
  20. FeistyBoots

    FeistyBoots
    Member

    Basically, the creepster assholes who think cold approaches are okay don't recognize their male privilege to disregard women's feelings on the matter.
     
  21. Soran

    Soran
    Member

    Yes
     
  22. This seems relevant to this thread

     
  23. excelsiorlef

    excelsiorlef
    Member

    Your posts in here contribute to women's misery though so
     
  24. excelsiorlef

    excelsiorlef
    Member

    "Do you want to go on a date with me to Kroger?"
     
  25. Mib

    Mib
    Member

    To the women of era, what's the difference between a guy trying a cold approach, and a guy just having a casual conversation with a stranger? I get that it's different depending on where you live, but where I live it sometimes feels impossible to go out and not talk to a couple people. People have brought up public vs social spaces, but they're kind of the same thing here.

    I've never gone up to a random girl or guy with the intention of dating them, but if I'm bored and less antisocial than usual, I'll go talk to people to pass the time. Other than someone being overly persistent or upfront/overt about wanting to date you, what's the difference?
     
  26. Omegamon

    Omegamon
    Member

    the one who walks away first tho

    We know it, don't worry. If you just want a casual conversation we will know.
     
  27. Dragnipur

    Dragnipur
    Banned Member

    • User banned (3 weeks) - antagonizing the women of this forum + history of severe infractions
    If y'all can't handle different opinions then you have bigger problems than what was posted in the OP.
     
  28. excelsiorlef

    excelsiorlef
    Member

    We can handle it.... doesn't mean you're not adding to the misery jar.
     
  29. HyperFerret

    HyperFerret
    Member

    A guy who comments on my looks within the first three sentences.
    A guy who asks if I have a boyfriend as an opener.
    A guy who has some friends off to the side who are (silently) cheering him on.
    A wingman who makes it obvious he's a wingman.
    A guy who walks up with a drink (intending to give me one).
    A guy who is physically blocking me in some way.

    I don't trust these types.

    Casual conversation is more like, waiting in a queue and commenting about things that tend to some up in normal small talk. Or you know, anything that isn't talking about me.
     
  30. meow

    meow
    Member

    I think instead of imagining that they're being approached by instagram models or sexy gamer chicks or whatever fantasy is playing out in their heads, they should imagine that they are being approached by the female-but-otherwise-identical version of the other guys posting in this thread saying they support these antics, and then evaluate how much they like the scenario.
     
  31. Dragnipur

    Dragnipur
    Banned Member

    Well in that case, if me saying "I don't mind when I get cold approached" adds to your misery jar, I don't care.
     
  32. excelsiorlef

    excelsiorlef
    Member

    Fret not your lack of capacity to care was never in question here by anyone.
     
  33. Soran

    Soran
    Member

    This is the bigger one. Any vague mention about you having a boyfriend active my fight-or-fligh sense. Actually I don't trust anyone who ask that shit because is homophobic.
     
  34. psychowave

    psychowave
    Member

    this "if a woman isn't interested i'll just move on!!" shit shows how little y'all understand. when you're a woman and some rando approaches you, it never is as easy as "sorry i'm not interested". you never know if he'll back down. you never know if he'll stop bothering you. honestly? you never know if you won't get raped and killed. and that might seem like an exaggeration, but the point is that it happens often enough that it's always a possibility in our heads. you men really don't understand how much energy we put in interacting with you in such a way that it'll minimize the probability that we'll get raped.

    to you, the situation might look like "i approached a woman, she said she wasn't interested and i just moved on, it's all good". to her, the picture is a lot different.
    also this
     
  35. i-hate-u

    i-hate-u
    Member

    As someone who didn't grow up in a western culture, this idea was very obvious to our society where I am from, and is ingrained in it. It's funny how the Western call themselves so advanced yet can't understand the basic biological differences between Men and Women.
     
  36. Peltz

    Peltz
    Member

    Sensible post. Sums up my stance.
     
  37. Xaszatm

    Xaszatm
    Member

    But somehow men have it worse because our fragile little egos will be devastated if we aren't coddled at every second.

    /s

    Still can't believe someone made that BS equivalence.
     
  38. muteKi

    muteKi
    Member


    This is sort of the corollary to why I don't want to encourage a sort of "well, it's OK if you're, fucking, I dunno, Idris Elba" attitude to this. Plenty of superficially charming abusive assholes out there (not to imply anything about the character of Idris Elba in particular, mind, who for all I know is actually a cool guy in real life), and it's also not like attractiveness is an immutable or universal quality rather than being a very subjective decision.
     
  39. Sophia

    Sophia
    Member

    I guess the biggest difference is that guys trying the cold approach make the conversation about the people in it, regardless of what the actual topic is. Where as guys who are actually interested in having a conversation make it about the conversation itself.

    To give you an example, when I was on campus, the first week I didn't have internet in my dorm room. So I had to use my phone to go watch the latest episodes of Boruto. Which meant leaving my dorm room and finding a spot on campus that had a good signal. When I was there, a guy approached me and started conversation with me. Ostensibly, the topic was about Boruto, Naruto, and Anime, but everything he said came around to being about him or me. Like that it was cool that I liked Boruto/Naruto/Anime for example, what my favorite kinds of anime were, and such. Eventually, he dropped all pretenses and made it clear he wanted to be friends, and that he'd like to talk again in the future. Thankfully, I was able to imply without much issue that I had a boyfriend already, and he didn't seem like the kind of person who would react negatively (he was fairly soft spoken and civil, unlike a lot of men who try this approach), but the situation still left me feeling a little bit creeped out.
     
  40. Masozi

    Masozi
    Member

    I get pretty on edge immediately. A couple of people that abused me started by doing that.
     
  41. Famassu

    Famassu
    Member

    Don't approach random women in public who are out to do some random business and have given no indication of being interested in you or even having noticed you at all. If you want to pick up women, bars and other kind of casual social gatherings exist for that type of thing (if bars aren't your thing, take dancing classes or begin to visit some other hobby gatherings and see if you can find someone through those venues, though even then don't be too aggressive about it, let people have a safe space to practice their hobby and only ask if someone seems genuinely interested in you). Don't harass random women on the streets when they are likely to prefer to just be able to run errands/go on with their lives un-harassed by thirsty men who think they can sneak up to a woman and get a number to set up a date.
     
  42. Messofanego

    Messofanego
    Member

    Only because the power dynamic is towards straight men. Imagine a world where women were physically stronger and chased men down blocks, catcalled them in a higher frequency, slutshamed, threatened with rape and violence after rejections, etc.

    Actually there's a French film by Eleanore Pourriat all about that kind of alternative world, I Am Not An Easy Man.

    [​IMG]
     
  43. hydrophilic attack

    hydrophilic attack
    Member OP

    having read this kind of pua "advice" a few years back (though mostly being too shy back then to put it into practice) i feel like maybe i can speak for why this paradox happens. it's a combination of a few things actually

    1. these guides and videos are generally addressed to lonely guys without much of a social circle so they likely don't have many friends, whether male or female (but especially not female) to consult

    2. these people are trying to upsell their readers all the time. the free blog posts and videos are there to sell you on their newsletter, on their e-book, on their personal coaching courses. to get people to part with their money, they're making a hard sale predicated on the fact that they have unique knowledge that you can get nowhere else. "don't listen to your friends. especially don't listen to your girl friends. they don't know the secret paths into the pants of hotties and cuties everywhere" that only this particular dating coach/guru/sensei knows

    3. the "systems", "game plans" and "strategies" that these people sell are built on a foundation of misogyny. and the incel-types that are the intended target audience also tend to have misogynistic views. as such, it is easy to sell the idea that "women don't really know what they want". as such, they say, you shouldn't listen to what women say they want, how they say they want to be approached, because those silly irrational females really can't be expected to think straight about what they actually want. as such, one shouldn't listen to what one's female friends say. one should only listen to the secret alpha knowledge of the dating coach/master/mentor/shaman to learn the mystical inner workings of the female

    4. when people who have bought into these ideas get confronted with contradictory evidence, the sunken cost fallacy kicks in. if you observe that the methods don't work for you, you just haven't fully understood them yet and/or just need to work harder and harass even more women. if women tell you to stop and at length explain how your behaviour is toxic and damaging, then maybe you'll feel bad for awhile, but chances are in the end you'll go back to thinking that eventually the methods will give you success, so then does it really matter if a few eggs are crushed along the way? after all, once you realize that you've been following junk advice for so long, you'll have to confront the fact all that time, energy and money spent was wasted, and you won't get them back .you'll have to confront the fact that when you thought you were being "courageous" and "alpha", you were actually just being a creep all that time. and that can be quite a difficult thing to take in!
     
  44. Peltz

    Peltz
    Member

    Nvm
     
  45. sabrina

    sabrina
    Member

    No. I don't like when women cold approach me either, although that's been super rare. I met my wife ages ago at a youth group event, and we were just friends for a long time.
     
  46. mael

    mael
    Member

    That movie is great although I don't really like the ending.
    A friend played a minor role in it too.
     
  47. excelsiorlef

    excelsiorlef
    Member

    Hey... why are you making this a Western thing as if women's privacy and right not to be harassed is so respected outside the West.

    You've made some posts in here that show that you kind of get it but this, this is just a bit much dude. Women not wanting to be harassed aren't pawns for your little feud against The West.
     
  48. #blessed this thread is still going
     
  49. mael

    mael
    Member

    From my perspective it's also super weird when you realize how little they give a shit about women's perspective outside of the West.
    Like let's not pretend that Russia, the middle East, India, China or South America is a heaven for women either.
     
  50. muteKi

    muteKi
    Member

    "The basic biological differences between Men and Women" have never been all that cut-and-dry either. I'm usually wary of where statements like that wind up going ideologically
     
  51. BlackGoku03

    BlackGoku03
    Member

    Oh, I completely understand why it happens. I just think the reverse is amusing.

    Looks like a cool flick. Will have to check it out! Thanks.