The reality is many men understand and empathize more with being an icel than being a woman.
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Henry Cavill: Hesitant to date in fear of being called a rapist
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The reality is many men understand and empathize more with being an icel than being a woman.
What folks?
It's not an example because it isn't real, what is a real world example of this happening?
Nothing to add but I agree fully. I've never been in those situations but I am careful to watch what I say and maneuver myself accordingly.
I would say it's highly likely blasting music from your phone (because it's 2018) outside will more than likely just piss someone off.
I'm assuming though.
I'm assuming though.
What's with all of DC's leading men? Leto's a pedo, Batfleck's Sadfleck, and now Cavill's making weird comments.
.... I know you're banned but... you DO realize that you've been talking to at least 3 women including myself in this thread, right? Like, get out of here with this "you're just white knighting" dumb deense.
Fantasies in movies exist for entertainment. Using them to defend someone complaining about no meaning no is a sad and irrelevant argument.
If you get banned for this reasoned and self aware post then they might as well ban me too.
No issue is ever black and white.
Some are, yep. Yet women are the 'emotional crazy' ones lol
If anything, it proves that one idolized celebrity really can embolden a lot of dudes with shitty beliefs to come out of the wood work. There's nothing like Superman himself telling you you're right about women, and that #MeToo is going too far.
Whay?
1. Wasn't a false accusation type of situation.
2. I'm unaware of his career being ruined. He decided to take some kind of break on his own but that's his own decision and I'm unaware of him actually being pushed out of acting or suffering any actual consequences or anything. The guy is currently completely fine.
3. If anything, the woman in that situation got much, much worse than him and hot attacked by all kinds of people as damaging the #MeToo movement and there was all kinds of misinformation about what she actually claimed happened and what she was actually talking about and trying to get across. And this is despite, IIRC Ansari hi.self not directly denying what she said happeed.
What words would make it better and what was he trying to say? Because it's the sentiment that's the problem here, not the words: the idea that this is a thing that happens enough (and particularly is happening more, in this modern context) to be worried about in the first place. Like, more than getting into a car accident or something that's infinitely more likely. More than he himself, even as a man, being sexually harassed/assaulted raped, even after people like Terry Crews have come forward about what happened to then, even despite the fact that this too is more common than men actually being not only falsely accused but suffering any kind of meaningful consequences due to said false accusation.
But yet, despite that, it's the false accusations he's worried about anyway? What's that saying if he doesn't think that such things are way more common than they are? Why is that of all things what's on his mind if he doesn't actually believe that? It comes from the same myths that make it so hard for women to come forward and be believed in the first place, and that's why it's getting the reaction it's getting.
And that's combined with his other statements about missing the days when no didn't mean no, an instead of y'know, thinking it's a good thing that women are believed when they say no, instead saying that he still wants to keep trying when he's told no but only stops because he's afraid if going to jail. Not because he respects the woman and her wishes and believes her, but simply because he's scared of going to jail and that's the type of thing he's thinking about. I don't see a good way of taking that without not only completely changing his word but the sentiment behind them as well.
My eyes legit widened when I read it, that story scares me to hell.
so true. it is such a basic concept to grasp, blows my mind how men just cannot understand it.
Would you consider addressing the point rather than the one example?
I mean, come on....
Do you agree that "What one person finds creepy another may find romantic?"
Are you able to consider this specific question without a deflection and personal attack ?
I'm not gonna ban him. It's one thing to say "I had this experience," it's another to say "all/many women are just trying to find an excuse to #metoo me to bankruptcy" or something insane like that.
What is the specific scenario you are referring to? That is a very broad statement, I asked you for a real-world example, and then we can walk through it from there. Of course people have preferences, almost universally a woman's preference is going to be that someone respects their personal space/privacy, respects consent, respects when they are told "no".
They attacked your argument, they called it a sad and irrelevant argument.
I never once engaged in a personal attack.
Of course, it's entirely possible that someone might like being pursued after giving out a hard "No". The point is that it's not worth risking pursuing it if you are potentially harassing someone for doing so.
If you're fucking Superman, I'm confident you can find opportunities elsewhere. Even if you're not, someone playing games and potentially leading to sexual harassment by a continued pursuit from the person being rejected is not worth it.
How about if you get a "No", move the fuck on. A small price to pay for guaranteeing you're not going to be harassing someone.
I'm confident every person on earth is capable of this and successfully moving on with their lives with no trouble.
Preach!
Men have utterly failed to teach the next generation of men how to be men. And I don't mean stereotypical masculinity - I mean how men should live and behave. And I don't mean how men should live and behave in 2018 because suddenly the rules changes - I mean how men should have been all along.
To all those folks getting banned: is it possible for a woman to falsely accuse a man of rape? Sure. It's also possible for me to get mugged walking to work, but I don't cross the street every time I see a homeless person on the sidewalk. Should celebrities and other rich people be wary of who let they let into their lives lest they be some grifter? Sure - but in the context of this conversation how is that helpful to point out? And linking it to MeToo which empowered women everywhere to finally feel comfortable speaking out about their experiences is tone deaf in the most generous interpretation
Yep... that's what the people that end up getting banned never realize.
"I was just expressing my opinion in a really abrasive and disengeuous way!"
I'll go further than Hecht's point here and say this:
First, T'Challa Shakur, I'm glad that you got this sorted out even after being wrongly accused. But please, notice this, your personal anedocte has NOTHING to do with what Cavill is saying. He's talking about not being allowed to "chase women" because we are in the #MeToo movement era. I'm no a saint, but I didn't need the #MeToo movement to know that when someone says no, it's fucking no. There's no point in keep chasing. What Cavill is talking about and what you are talking about are different things, regardless how much you seem to want to relativize what Cavill said, your personal account and this:
Let's not be naive here. Your personal anedocte isn't a good example to something like this. Cavill explicitly says that he'd like to "chase women". Here's some newsflash: chasing people is fucking annoying to those who are chased. There's nothing romantic about that. When something clicks, people chase each other. It's truly not rocket science.
I think there are lots of men online who have had little to no experience dating or even talking to women IRL and feel insecure about how the imagined penalties for their inexperience have significantly increased, or they simply can't stand the idea that them mistreating a women might actually have consequences. Some are for similar reasons wracked with anxiety about false rape accusations; this latter point is particularly egregious when you consider that the majority of rapes are not even prosecuted, and false accusations are statistically insignificant. It would be like not dating because you're worried about being hit by a car on the way to the restaurant.
I can't say I have any sympathy for men like this, as it's not womens' job to be the victims of random mens' incompetence.
Thirst tweets! Seems in poor taste but whatever.
Here's some perspective:
Someone in this thread compared false accusations to literal cancer.
Having had an experience with an ex girlfriend that deliberately tried to ruin my life with a vindictiveness I've never seen in someone, man or woman, the topic of "always believe the woman" is a little scary. To have someone hate you that much (or be manic) is very unnerving tbh. Like, she told blatant lies to my friends and family and if I didn't keep the receipts (text messages, etc) that could have seriously damaged my relationships. I'm grateful I protected myself but other men aren't as lucky. But I'm just a random dude, I can't imagine some of the pressure involved for a celebrity especially when your entire career could be ruined.
In that regard, I see Henry's point to an extent, but I think he's worded it poorly and exaggerated it a ton if the responses ITT are to be believed. No woman is going to cry rape if you flirt with her and she rejects your advances. That's just silly. If that's the case, maybe your flirting is wildly inappropriate and should be checked. What I do believe is that it probably couldn't hurt to be a little more selective in your dating process if you're worried about shacking up with crazy. I know at some point it's rolling the dice (some people are great at hiding), but there's nothing wrong with being a little bit more prudent and looking beyond some hot LA girl and seeing what she's really like before being intimate with her.
That said, the #MeToo movement has done a lot of good in empowering women and giving them the strength to come forward. However, this shoot first and ask questions later is unacceptable. Some people online - not saying ITT - believe that women are infallible and put them on a pedestal when it comes to issues like this, not realizing that they're human beings too and can be just as shady. Mens' lives and reputation are on the line, at the very least having a stay of execution while the allegations are investigated is a step in the right direction and I believe we're slowly getting there.
In that regard, I see Henry's point to an extent, but I think he's worded it poorly and exaggerated it a ton if the responses ITT are to be believed. No woman is going to cry rape if you flirt with her and she rejects your advances. That's just silly. If that's the case, maybe your flirting is wildly inappropriate and should be checked. What I do believe is that it probably couldn't hurt to be a little more selective in your dating process if you're worried about shacking up with crazy. I know at some point it's rolling the dice (some people are great at hiding), but there's nothing wrong with being a little bit more prudent and looking beyond some hot LA girl and seeing what she's really like before being intimate with her.
That said, the #MeToo movement has done a lot of good in empowering women and giving them the strength to come forward. However, this shoot first and ask questions later is unacceptable. Some people online - not saying ITT - believe that women are infallible and put them on a pedestal when it comes to issues like this, not realizing that they're human beings too and can be just as shady. Mens' lives and reputation are on the line, at the very least having a stay of execution while the allegations are investigated is a step in the right direction and I believe we're slowly getting there.
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That's not a thirst tweet. She's taking the piss out of him. I thought an obvious joke tweet would lighten the mood slightly after 26 pages of this complete shit show thread in which an endless parade of men come in and cape for the rich, successful idiot who apparently doesn't have a clue on how to interact with women. Apparently I was wrong about the joke being obvious.
lmao that went completely over my head.
It's just weird timing for that kind of joke. Leading with some acting range jab, like really? That's the comment you go with for this news?
I don't know why people are posting anecdotes where they were falsely accused which has resulted in little to no consequences for them then saying it supports what Cavill said, even if you strip it of the celeb context? I mean I don't think many people have denying false accusations happen, but it only strengthens that idea that men's fear of the life ruining consequences of false rape/abuse accusations is hugely overblown to the extent that even the anecdotes that supposedly illustrate it have to be augmented with "Well, if this one thing wasn't like this the final result could have been so different."
She's taking the piss outta him in the lightest way possible, seems totally permissible.
Assuming you mean unnecessary, why yes of course they can. But since this thread ran it's course about 20 pages ago with the same tedious arguments being made, shredded, made again, shredded again, that joke is infinitely more worthwhile than anything else.
Edit: In case it's not clear, the tedious arguments are the men coming in with "well I see what he means, it's a minefield out there", not the many people patiently explaining over and over again that this take is bad.
Edit: In case it's not clear, the tedious arguments are the men coming in with "well I see what he means, it's a minefield out there", not the many people patiently explaining over and over again that this take is bad.
There were serious issues that were worth discussing, but the author of the original article approached the whole thing in a childish manner that hurt her argument.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjRYbR_-Dhw
I mean...dude is famous and sexy (he's also my GF crush) and he's just worried of someone who can take advantage of his position just by accusing him of something not true and then we know what happens, you're guilty also if your innocent so I understand him form that POV.
How can someone understand "I want to rape girls but ya know...i'll just bang my ex once in while" is something I don't get
How can someone understand "I want to rape girls but ya know...i'll just bang my ex once in while" is something I don't get
"He can't act" is lazy, off topic and unnecessary, especially given the context. You can like it but it's perfectly understandable to not.
What happens? I'm dying to hear about all these falsely accused powerful men who have become poor and destitute from false accusations. Who are they?
I never noticed any of your posts before yesterday when you were defending me in the Arenanet thread (thanks btw) but now you're one of my favorites.