At the risk of sounding stupid: I don't understand how a crocodile or alligator can be dangerous.
- Thread starter Lant_War
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Blackthorne: Tell them that alligators are weak-kneed, blunt-toothed cowards fit only for luggage and entertaining small children at birthday parties. Give me my ship and a stiff wind; I'll bring you back as many hides as you like, well-tanned and supple. Don't even get me started on pissing crocodiles. Cold blooded bastards, the lot of them.
Mariko: The Anjin says he could perhaps defeat an alligator with great effort and ingenuity.
GOAT post
Blackthorne: Tell them that alligators are weak-kneed, blunt-toothed cowards fit only for luggage and entertaining small children at birthday parties. Give me my ship and a stiff wind; I'll bring you back as many hides as you like, well-tanned and supple. Don't even get me started on pissing crocodiles. Cold blooded bastards, the lot of them.
Mariko: The Anjin says he could perhaps defeat an alligator with great effort and ingenuity.
I could fucking HEAR this.
Best post in the thread.
OP: "At the risk of sounding stupid"
These are predators that haven't had to evolve much from their ancestors some 30 million years ago. We questioning if they're dangerous?? In the words of Sterling Archer "Maybe deep down I'm afraid of any apex predator that lived through the K-T extinction. Physically unchanged for a hundred million years, because it's the perfect killing machine."
These are predators that haven't had to evolve much from their ancestors some 30 million years ago. We questioning if they're dangerous?? In the words of Sterling Archer "Maybe deep down I'm afraid of any apex predator that lived through the K-T extinction. Physically unchanged for a hundred million years, because it's the perfect killing machine."
When you think about dangerous animals, usual ones come up. Bears, Tigers, Lions, Hippos, Sharks, Snakes - but if I've learnt something from interacting with floridian-made content is that most people in florida are absolutely terrified of alligators.
This is the thing, I don't get it at all. Look at this little dude:
If this approaches you, it feels like it could hardly do any damage. Just manage to stay away from its mouth, jump on top of it or something and problem solved? I promise I'm not trying to sound like a "I could kill a bear" dumbass but I don't understand how these can be threatful to humans. Am I missing something?
They're very fast, even on land. If they chase you you're in trouble, if they chase you in the water you're FUCKED.
What they do is grab you and twirl around thrashing the flesh they grabbed with their teeth in what's called the "death roll". They do a barrel roll and rip your flesh along with it. And their tail can break femurs if they snap it hard enough. They're very powerful.
Real talk now, massive respect to the OP for wanting to read cool croc/gator facts but knowing if they asked for it they'd just get sent to Wikipedia so they sacrificed their pride and have been feasting all day long.
😐
Um yeah I don't get what's the big deal about Levar Burton I reckon I could beat him up as long as I didn't let him bite me twice.
wat, how you gonna survive with a missing limb?
This is not a video game
Love how it turns, looks for a split second before making the jump.
i dont think alligators are that bad on land if you keep your distance, but cant crocs outrun humans even on land?
Sounds like they would make good insurance fraud investiGators.
Throw one tree one time and they pounce.
This popped up in my feed today and all I could think of was this thread.
View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhzc5J1BJNU
View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhzc5J1BJNU
That is one of the scariest situations a person can face. When he dipped in the water I stopped breathing.
Era on a roll lol
Blackthorne: Tell them that alligators are weak-kneed, blunt-toothed cowards fit only for luggage and entertaining small children at birthday parties. Give me my ship and a stiff wind; I'll bring you back as many hides as you like, well-tanned and supple. Don't even get me started on pissing crocodiles. Cold blooded bastards, the lot of them.
Mariko: The Anjin says he could perhaps defeat an alligator with great effort and ingenuity.
What a guy!I don't think you realise how agile and cunning they are.
You'd be hard pressed to find a mammal that can't, honestly. Look up bats and rabbits swimming, both are an absolute delight to watch. Chimps are the only ones that immediately come to mind who really don't do well in water…
I would argue it is something like this.
edit : changed the graph from you swimming in the crocs on water scenario, to you walking on land in every case.
Compared to most big land predators having a healthy distance from them should be safe enough, mostly because they aren't really hunting when they are on land, but if you get close enough you quickly cross a threshold where they are capable of killing you.
On land they are dangerous in the same way electric current, land mines, and other proximity hazards are dangerous, or how venomous snakes are dangerous. They don't run after you, but being close enough for them to land one bite is more dangerous than any single bite of any high mobility mammal predator.
edit : changed the graph from you swimming in the crocs on water scenario, to you walking on land in every case.
Compared to most big land predators having a healthy distance from them should be safe enough, mostly because they aren't really hunting when they are on land, but if you get close enough you quickly cross a threshold where they are capable of killing you.
On land they are dangerous in the same way electric current, land mines, and other proximity hazards are dangerous, or how venomous snakes are dangerous. They don't run after you, but being close enough for them to land one bite is more dangerous than any single bite of any high mobility mammal predator.
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Noooo, noooooo. What a horrible experience. Fuck going underwater.
Nope nope nope never being that close to water in a swamp. I'm surprised he survived without incident.
Yeah, that's terrifying. Imagine if he lost his paddle when he was dumped in even beyond being dumped in the water.
Just sitting there with no way to paddle unless you use your hands in the water
Evolution is constantly happening, even to crocodilians. When it's an improvement, the animal benefits and the mutation sticks around through subsequent generations. In the case of crocodilians and sharks, every random mutation they've had in the last 100 million years or so has been a downgrade, so.... yeah, they're pretty much peak. Evolution hasn't stopped, it just hasn't been able to improve on that design.
What added to the terrifying factor was the gator using stealth + 3 and just disappering.
If Crocodile touches you with his hand, he can sap the moisture out of your body until you crumble to dust, it's pretty horrifying.
Wouldn't that make the humble horseshoe crab the perfect lifeform? Unchanged for like 450 million years.
This is evidence that OP is right, tbh... Person falls into the water and just gets up. If a gator rams your kayak just brush it off and leave...
Could the gator not find the human after the crash? Was probably drunk swimming in the first place, thus the hit and run...
If that nerd rammed my kayak I'd just punch him in the face. Call it "overconfidence" and "too many movies" but I think I'd be ok.
lmao holy shit