Do you feel like you’re nearly done with the gaming community?

[TheEchosOfTheCyborg]

For the past few months, I've just grown more tired and tired and tired of the gaming community. After over a decade of putting up with some of the toxic nonsense that gaming produces, It's just gotten too much for me and after this weekend, I'm pretty much done.

I'm just sick of it, I'm sick of the reviewers getting harassed and 8.8 controversies, I'm sick of the sheer amount of gate keeping, elitism and fan wars over every single little thing and the sheer petty "victories". I'm sick of the constant toxic abuse people get on sites like Gamefaq for asking for help or advice (why do they still call that sight Gamefaq?), I'm sick of places like 4chan. Kotaku in Action and r/Kappa allowed to exist and treated with normality. I'm sick of the casual racism, ableism, sexism and homophobia, I'm sick of the video pundits treating their opinions as "objective fact" and further encouraging the toxicity like MovieBob and Yahtzee. I'm sick of being made miserable or getting tons of hate for liking/not liking a game (both on the internet and offline) and plus with some other personal issues about gaming, I'm sick of all of it.

And after this weekend where the very worst of the fighting game fandom came out with their sexism, "core values" memes and "This will piss of the SJWs, I'm buying the game!" and so much else, besides being completely done with the competitive fighting game community, I just feel done with the gaming community.

Has anyone else been feeling this way or has felt like this in the past? How did you deal with the feelings of frustration? Do you feel that the gaming community can be changed or you'd feel better by just staying away from gaming communities for a while?

Also I'd like to say thank you to the users over at the Why Women Criticize Sexualized Character Designs thread for being super cool the past weekend.

 

[TheRaidenPT]

The secret is not caring, there's certain things in life where you gotta stop caring and this is one of them just saying.

Take a break if it helps, tons of insiders take breaks from to time due to the amount of hate going on

 

[nsilvias]

its not the game community, its the internet. this is just how the internet is and i hate it.

 

[Kilgore]

I feel like you're nearly done with the gaming comunity indeed.

 

[Resilient]

I honestly can't blame you

 

[Deleted member 8861]

Its not the internet, its humanity. this is just how humanity is and i hate it.

 

[Deleted member 2809]

Gamers are trash

 

[WhisperOfMalice]

Agreed it's super exhausting.

 

[bane833]

This is no different in any other kind of community. Be it movies, smartphones, Cars, sports or whatever. You have these kind of people everywhere and i don't think it makes sense to single out gaming.

 

[Deleted member 21339]

Why not just play the games you like and avoid the community aspects?

 

[Ravelle]

Nah, those whiny bitches don't belong to the community. It's the good folks who do. Don't follow the drama and horrible boards like gross subreddits and 4chan and you'll be fine. Stick to the good parts.

As for the threads here, just don't read them. Life's too short to get worked up about other people.

 

[Mhj]

Insecure people are toxic. Group think validates. Many people on Internet are alone, miserable and would rather drag you down with them.

Just ignore. Don't participate.

 

[elenarie]

You should drop by the Bioware related threads on this very forum for some encouragement, spiritual enlightenment and restoration of belief in humanity. :)

 

[LuisGarcia]

No. Most of that gamers I come across are nice people.

Obviously there are some which are bellends buts that's true of pretty much any community.

This site likes to generalise a whole lot

 

[spineduke]

The secret is not caring, there's certain things in life where you gotta stop caring and this is one of them just saying.

Click to shrink...

I find the apathy of users who don't care about issues revolving around women, consumer rights, workers rights etc the most suffocating thing of all, becuase its so prevalent, and so insidious.

 

[Lowrys]

You don't have to enjoy the community to enjoy the games.

 

[Aters]

Not gonna lie, I think I'm a better person when I'm not on this board. There're so many little things that put me in bad mood. Like all the witch hunts, all the artificial hypes, all the cheerleading, and all the victories over stats.

 

[cvbas]

Yeah, I've been like this for some time. I actually spent some time not playing a lot of videogames (2017 and most of 2018) for reasons not directly tied to the community, and now that I'm starting to enjoy playing again I can't stand the community. I guess I had forgotten how immature it is.

 

[duckroll]

Do you spend the majority of your free time on the internet? When you start to do less of that you will naturally find that with less time to spend online, you spend it more on the things that you really want to care about - chatting with actual friends online you've made, reading news updates and watching trailers only for things that you are looking forward to, etc. It becomes easy to distance yourself from the bubbles that form around the online space with people just shouting over each other, and you'll find that all the drama and stuff that has nothing to do with you personally don't bother you as much anymore.

Find activities and communities beyond the internet, get active and do stuff that make you feel happier and more fulfilled. In turn with less time to "waste" online, you will treasure the parts of your hobbies you truly care about, and appreciate those things more.

 

[Pingal Pratyush]

Have your own perspective and be in a community you truly respect and desire to be in.

 

[Papaya]

I wouldn't really say that's gamers. That's just a certain group of young American men, TBH. Competitive games, especially, skew male. Content people are never the obnoxious ones, and it will always be the people with a chip on their shoulder. They know they are losing the culture war, and they are just gonna be the loudest ones in the room until...forever. There are a ton of progressive gamers out there, you just need to find a group of friends, and stick with them. You can't really do anything about those type of people, except make your voice heard, and shame them (or report if you can).

 

[Cokesouls]

Getting more tired of the negativity for sure. Resetera feels less and less healthy.

 

[TheEchosOfTheCyborg]

And I screwed up the Thread's title...

 

[ASaiyan]

It is very tiring to keep fighting the good fight for common decency, respect and love. It is exhausting to see more and more examples of hatred and ignorance pop up and go unpunished. It is frustrating to feel like you are screaming at a wall. And it is dismaying to feel as though you are powerless, or that victory is out of reach.

But we have to try.

 

[PixelatedDonut]

That's just people on the internet.....like you guys needs to understand what social networking does to people. I've seen changes in my friends from their useage of Twitter. Toxicity is apart of internet culture.....it's a circle of people being toxic and overly offended, then people get offended that someone else is offended. Its quite annoying constantly seeing people bicker over stupid shit and trying to one up eachother so they seem funny.

 

[Renna Hazel]

I never fit in with gaming communities. I have my friends who play games but if they ever want to go to an event or convention I tend to sit those out. Reset Era is probably as far as I'll go with engaging with gamers, as it's rarely as fun as it should be. At least sexism isn't permitted here though.

 

[nsilvias]

Its not the internet, its humanity. this is just how humanity is and i hate it.

Click to shrink...

 

[texhnolyze]

Being a shitty human being combined with anonymity is the reason for all this.

It's a bit better in Era because people value their accounts. But even so, it's like everyone have a burner account to post some bullshit which would lead to a ban every day. When you realize that there are active posters behind those accounts which you interact every day make you shudder a little.

 

[LuisGarcia]

Getting more tired of the negativity for sure. Resetera feels less and less healthy.

Click to shrink...

Yeah it's funny that this topic is talking about outside communities but Resetera is one of the worst. Place is so toxic and overly negative.

People actually get excited when games fail. I honestly was browsing gamefaqs the other day and found it to have a better atmosphere then this place.

It's a shame because a lot of this site is great

 

[Mister X]

Best tip: Don't take it too serious.

Gaming is a hobby and needs to stay fun. Ignore the toxic elements (ake multiplayer, online forums, etc)

Focus on the games you like and understand the "gaming community" is diverse with multiple opinions which some will surely won't align with yours.

 

[duckroll]

I find the apathy of users who don't care about issues revolving around women, consumer rights, workers rights etc the most suffocating thing of all, becuase its so prevalent, and so insidious.

Click to shrink...

It is very tiring to keep fighting the good fight for common decency, respect and love. It is exhausting to see more and more examples of hatred and ignorance pop up and go unpunished. It is frustrating to feel like you are screaming at a wall. And it is dismaying to feel as though you are powerless, or that victory is out of reach.

But we have to try.

Click to shrink...

I feel the trick isn't to not care about issues that are important, but rather to recognize that the majority of negativity and toxic stuff online is out of our hands and not worth engaging in. Instead there are ways to channel our time and energy to issues we care about in more productive ways. Making a difference in a tangible way even in a small community can feel great. Volunteering at a local program helps people you can see and relate to, and makes you feel better too. Arguing or being distressed about toxic stuff on the internet? Not so much. It's a losing battle for personal mental health.

 

[JigglesBunny]

Judging by this post, yes, I do feel like you are almost done with the gaming community.

Seriously though, for my own part I know that I'm often overly critical and hyperbolic at times and I certainly haven't stayed out of my fair share of arguments here but at the end of the day, I really have a love and appreciation for most of the people here. I grew up lacking gamer friends and certainly people with a knowledge so deep and an appreciation so undeniable for the medium and being in his community for years now (counting the other site) has been one of the best things I ever used the damned internet for.

I've made friends, developed in jokes and more than anything, I found a sense of belonging and safety in knowing that I can always turn here no matter what's going on in my day and just shoot the shit with folks like me who just love games, movies, comics and whatever else. I can't deny there are rough patches but at the end of the day, this little gaming community is one that I'm glad to call home.

 

[Cenauru]

That's just the internet in a nutshell. You can express ideas and share them at any time and always have an audience, it's why gaming communities changed so drastically over the past couple decades. Sometimes you just need to protect your sanity and try and stay away from the bad news, if you are able to (Although I also understand that less priveledged people don't have that luxury). Set up filtered words on social media, mute, block, unfollow accounts that make it easy to see this stuff, stop visiting certain websites, etc. Even in other types of media, you're going to find similar issues, that's just one of the downsides to being able to share any idea or belief in an instant.

 

[Benzychenz]

Honestly I don't even know what most of the stuff you're talking about even is. If you don't enjoy this stuff then why are you so up to date with it all?

I just play games and sometimes chat about them on Era.

 

[Rickenslacker]

I can understand your frustrations and share them to an extent. I like to detox with Easy Allies and Classic Game Room, but I find it hard to actually participate in gaming communities because so often are people more interested in being shitty than having something worthwhile to say.

 

[Armoured_Bear]

-spend more time playing games than reading forums
-boycott toxic forums and look for better ones

 

[danmaku]

Stay away from new games and stick to community threads and LTTP, they tend to be less toxic and the discussion is more laid back and positive.

 

[MidnightCowboy]

That stuff is pretty easy to tune out. Just play games.

 

[Oaklight]

You should focus mostly on the games themselves and avoid the more toxic portions of the internet such as comments sections, certain forums, social media, etc. Finding a way to filter out all the toxicity is the key to good mental health when participating with the gaming community.

 

[Teeny]

It seems most of the things I like to talk about with randos on the internet have communities that have devolved into bullshit over the last few years and, yeah, it kind of gets me down. It feels like there can be no nuance of opinion any more, everything is either the best or the worst, no room for anything else. And people form sides as if it's some kind of war. It depresses me that people use things like games, film and any media pushed out by the corporate publishing machine to form such a massive part of their identities that they are willing to "go to war", so to speak. Or they get genuinely angry at the smallest of things they believe a developer/publisher/director/whatever has done to deliberately slight them. It's pathetic and sad.

I think it's the internet, the political climate, the heightened volume of a mass of voices. It's unavoidable and it has me avoiding all but the most niche and close-knit of communities.

 

[TheRaidenPT]

You should drop by the Bioware related threads on this very forum for some encouragement, spiritual enlightenment and restoration of belief in humanity. :)

Click to shrink...

Well, apart from whatever Anthem really is I think people are just sad and disappointed that the game isn't up to speed on performance/dialogue/storyline at least that's my thoughts after 25h..

But yeah people gotta start to separate things

 

[Patapuf]

I just curate what i engage with.

My "gaming community" is my friends, a few reviewers/content creators i follow and some subcommunities on ERA.

Sometimes i feel like arguing a point but mostly, if a particular topic annoys me i just ignore it. I have other things to do than follow all internet drama.

 

[TheRaidenPT]

I find the apathy of users who don't care about issues revolving around women, consumer rights, workers rights etc the most suffocating thing of all, becuase its so prevalent, and so insidious.

Click to shrink...

I don't think you fully understood my statement, I do care about the above you mentioned and I know first hand what is being miss treated at work within this industry.

Problem is, people like OP are at a breaking point regarding daily news and daily problems.

He just needs a break

 

[Bhonar]

I wouldn't really say that's gamers. That's just a certain group of young American men, TBH. Competitive games, especially, skew male. Content people are never the obnoxious ones, and it will always be the people with a chip on their shoulder. They know they are losing the culture war, and they are just gonna be the loudest ones in the room until...forever. There are a ton of progressive gamers out there, you just need to find a group of friends, and stick with them. You can't really do anything about those type of people, except make your voice heard, and shame them (or report if you can).

Click to shrink...

Why in the world are you only singling out American men?? That makes no sense.

You think Russian men are better? Saudi Arabian men? Chinese men??

How are Americans worse?

 

[Mechaplum]

Key is to not take it seriously, the negative stuff I mean just let it wash off your back. The gaming community isn't some monolithic group.

 

[lizqoris]

Yeah no. If you spend more time playing games rather than browsing and caring for useless topics in the internet for some reason, then you wont be annoyed by it.

For me, Video games are there for a reason, they provide you entertainment, to escape reality but alas, it seems to me that you are just looking for things that can just frustrate yourself.

 

[Pekola]

I understand you, OP.

To have a "healthy" relationship with the internet/gaming communities, you have to curate your experience. Use blocking tools. Word filters. Unfollow.

Also, insular communities (like this one) are full of different personalities. So to remain sane, you have to disengage. It's really easy to get sucked in by the aggressiveness here and well...basically everywhere on the web.

As a rule of thumb, remember that most people don't have the range to discuss certain topics.

 

[Zhukov]

Eh, I don't really consider myself part of "the gaming community", whatever that entails. I'm just a guy who sometimes browses forums and youtube.

Just as well too. This forum, more than any other place I've been, unless you count youtube comments, makes me glad I'm not invested in the "gaming community".

 

[lvl 99 Pixel]

You wont hear about the good experiences of communities because they don't make headlines so you have to remind yourself that there are still a lot of good people willing to interact with you in meaningful, not so mean spirited ways because its a shame to have to give up a hobby simply because you share it with some terrible people.

 

[Haribo]

Online gaming communities are pretty trash. Start going to real life conventions and meet ups and you'll start to see a better representation and I think have better interactions with it as a whole. I really just get on ResetEra to talk shit and read the more obscure news headlines.