How will you raise your children now that Video Games have become a dangerous influence?

[Cow Mengde]

I'm sure some of us experience or heard of the ruckus caused by Mortal Kombat, Night Trap, and Doom back in the day. The Columbine shootings were all over the news, and video games were to be blamed.

Plenty of us has played violent games growing up, and safe to say most of us aren't on America's Most Wanted.

Problem is, it's now 2021 and not 1999 and I'm honestly afraid that gaming can harm my (future) kids. Gaming is more toxic than ever, and plenty of hate groups are actively using video games to recruit kids and teens.

Right-Wing Hate Groups Are Recruiting Video Gamers

Experts say white supremacist hate groups are targeting young video game fans for recruitment via YouTube, Twitch, game-related forums and directly within multiplayer game chat.

www.npr.org

Ignoring the alt-right, sexual predators lurking in online gaming.

Has there been any discussion from people on how to deal with this new threat? If not, it might be good to start talking now. I didn't have internet until I was in my teens, and back then, the internet and online gaming's nothing compared to today. Those of us who grew up in the simpler times of gaming, are we ready to deal with the new and this time very real threat?

 

[Meg Cherry]

I think it's part of a wider conversation about safe media consumption, rather than anything specific to games.

 

[Ryuelli]

I think it's part of a wider conversation about safe media consumption, rather than anything specific to games.

Click to shrink...

Yep.

I'm a K-5 tech teacher, safe media consumption and media literacy is now one of our biggest focuses (that's the case with the district I'm at anyway). I'm having discussions with these kids that I had never received at that age.

You'd be surprised at the amount of 2nd and 3rd graders who have an encyclopedic knowledge of GTAV.

 

[TeenageFBI]

As before, video games are mostly fine. Unsupervised internet access is an issue though, whether in-game or out.

I'm a K-5 tech teacher, safe media consumption and media literacy is now one of our biggest focuses (that's the case with the district I'm at anyway). I'm having discussions with these kids that I had never received at that age.

Click to shrink...

That's good to hear.

 

[Lord Fanny]

The best solution is probably to just not have those future kids tbh. Not necessarily because of this issue specifically, but if this issue is a major concern, then what will be coming in the next few decades for these theoretical children are going to be far worse and more hellish than anything you're talking about. If you're expecting kids already, though, and you are looking for more in the near future, it's probably best to just keep them away from video games as much as possible.

 

[Cow Mengde]

I think it's part of a wider conversation about safe media consumption, rather than anything specific to games.

Click to shrink...

Sure, but nothing has the reach of gaming. Gaming and the internet are linked very tightly now. And like I said, we rightfully laughed at the thought of Mortal Kombat teaching us to kill, but will it blind us to the real danger that's taking shape now in games?

 

[Weiss]

I'm not a parent but I assumed (and am happy to be told I'm wrong) that a good way to start off with being a media watchdog for your kids is in giving them certain phrases or terms to look out for and that, if they hear it, they need to tell you.

Though I guess that has the problem where if they tell you about it you take it away because it's dangerous.

 

[RROCKMAN]

When they reach the magic age of 5 I'll take them downstairs and I'll show them the holy land

Well maintained consoles and games from NES to PS5, and Gameboy to Vita/Switch.

Get em in while they are young(can't complain about bad graphics if they were never exposed to the newest stuff), teach them how to be not be sore winners and and how to learn from defeat. Obviously mix this in with teaching them basic human dignity and respect since if it's lacking now, then it must be lacking in the future.

If they want to get into their current gen, they have to beat select games from each era and then beat my ass in Guilty Gear.

Then I'll know they are ready.

 

[Rosebud]

Single-player games/MP games with no chat/always muted chat.

Aren't these guys more on COD and games like that?

 

[Ryuelli]

Single-player games/MP games with no chat/always muted chat.

Aren't these guys more on COD and games like that?

Click to shrink...

Roblox, Minecraft, Fortnite, and Among Us are huge with elementary school kids.

 

[Rosebud]

Roblox, Fortnite, and Among Us are huge with elementary school kids.

Click to shrink...

Don't know about Roblox, but Among Us and Fortnite are easy to monitorate. Fortnite even has parents control to disable random voices.

 

[Lord Fanny]

When they reach the magic age of 5 I'll take them downstairs and I'll show them the holy land

Well maintained consoles and games from NES to PS5, and Gameboy to Vita/Switch.

Get em in while they are young(can't complain about bad graphics if they were never exposed to the newest stuff), teach them how to be not be sore winners and and how to learn from defeat. Obviously mix this in with teaching them basic human dignity and respect since if it's lacking now, then it must be lacking in the future.

If they want to get into their current gen, they have to beat select games from each era and then beat my ass in Guilty Gear.

Then I'll know they are ready.

Click to shrink...

...What does this have to do with anything being talking about lol?

 

[Dark Knight]

Roblox, Minecraft, Fortnite, and Among Us are huge with elementary school kids.

Click to shrink...

I can only speak to Fortnite here, but I will occasionally play squad games with randoms and I seriously haven't heard anyone use voice chat in that game in like 3 seasons. Literally nobody talks.

 

[Jonathan Lanza]

Isn't the solution just to keep them away from online games? Like I can't imagine my theoretical child falling prey to this were I to hand em a copy of Kingdom Hearts III to play or something.

 

[RROCKMAN]

...What does this have to do with anything being talking about lol?

Click to shrink...

Well specifically the idea is to introduce them into gaming in a closed environment so that you don't have to worry about them being exposed to stupid shit online initially. It doesn't even have to that elaborate lol I was kinda doing a bit.

Getting them into games where they have to deal with loss and frustration early on would be good so you could go over managing your anger at a loss and making sure they understand "heated gaming moments" isn't at all an effective way to dealing with a loss in a video game.

It was really a roundabout way of saying be there early so they already have a proper example, so they don't ever think that the negative stuff is ever ok. this includes the alt right trying to recruit via video games and smaller time idiots like Ninja or Pewdiepie, who you'd think makes it ok to throw out slurs so long as you apologize after.

 

[HardTimesFamilyPride]

Yep.

I'm a K-5 tech teacher, safe media consumption and media literacy is now one of our biggest focuses (that's the case with the district I'm at anyway). I'm having discussions with these kids that I had never received at that age.

Click to shrink...

That's super reassuring to read!

 

[Cow Mengde]

Yep.

I'm a K-5 tech teacher, safe media consumption and media literacy is now one of our biggest focuses (that's the case with the district I'm at anyway). I'm having discussions with these kids that I had never received at that age.

You'd be surprised at the amount of 2nd and 3rd graders who have an encyclopedic knowledge of GTAV.

Click to shrink...

I missed this post, but definitely good to hear something like this is in school.

 

[Crayolan]

This isn't a video game problem, it's an internet problem.

 

[texhnolyze]

My main plan is to have a parental control app on my kid, so that I know what they're installing and playing, especially when outside and out of my immediate reach.

Well specifically the idea is to introduce them into gaming in a closed environment so that you don't have to worry about them being exposed to stupid shit online initially. It doesn't even have to that elaborate lol I was kinda doing a bit.

Getting them into games where they have to deal with loss and frustration early on would be good so you could go over managing your anger at a loss and making sure they understand "heated gaming moments" isn't at all an effective way to dealing with a loss in a video game.

It was really a roundabout way of saying be there early so they already have a proper example, so they don't ever think that the negative stuff is ever ok. this includes the alt right trying to recruit via video games and smaller time idiots like Ninja or Pewdiepie, who you'd think makes it ok to throw out slurs so long as you apologize after.

Click to shrink...

It's not that simple. A kid will be exposed to online gaming sooner or later, most probably as soon as they're exposed to friends at school or the neighborhood. Unless you plan to keep your son at home at all times, it'll come to that eventually.

 

[Ramathevoice]

I'm a K-5 tech teacher, safe media consumption and media literacy is now one of our biggest focuses (that's the case with the district I'm at anyway). I'm having discussions with these kids that I had never received at that age

Click to shrink...

I am fuming that this doesn't exist where I live. I end up having to teach some of that stuff to my 20-year-old ESL students.

 

[Rotobit]

Internet safety should be taught in schools worldwide, really. It's pretty universally applicable across the board including video games. Of course it also falls on websites to more thoroughly moderate their content, especially the far right nonsense that they seemingly refuse to touch ATM because money trumps everything else, damn the consequences.

I'd say parents should monitor to a degree, too, at least until they have basic empathy and safety figured out. And fundamentally I'd cut off all access to voice chat with parental controls unless it's directly with kids they know from school or whatever.

 

[Acidote]

I already control most of what my nephews play.

No online stuff if I'm not with them, no free to play games because of their monetization. So they pretty much play what I gift them or tell their parents to buy.

 

[Sprat]

Every game my son plays I play through from start to finish first to make sure there's nothing questionable in it.

No online unsupervised and even then he can only play Minecraft with his cousin with a parent present at either end.

 

[Sky87]

Social media is way more harmful than gaming. Better to give them a console than a phone these days.

 

[Era of not Yakuza]

It's more about keeping a strict control of everything my future kids will access online. There are bad influences everywhere.

Xbox Milgrau for instance, they are on social media spreading hate speach, attacks against women/minorities. They use memes and jokes to look cool for kids. Hell, even a judge said they use a "teen vibe" and that it was prejudicial to kids, in a lawsuit they lost

I was shocked when I saw a kid, probably 12yo, talking about how gamers are opressed.

 

[Lord Azrael]

Just wanna add the very real risk of addiction

 

[War95]

Even on the PS3 era you could encounter kids playing GTA4, 5 and RDR1 Online. I always felt kinda uncomfortable hearing little kid voices playing those type of games. Imo is a real issue

 

[Rendering...]

It's the very same issue as media consumption and media literacy. So personally I'd be less worried about limiting my kid's exposure to specific games (though that's necessary too), and more about providing tools and learning opportunities for processing media in general.

One thing I'd definitely limit is access to voice chat. I think children need a bit of experience before you invite the filth of the world into your living room. Like, they should probably have some idea of how to wrap their heads around hate speech and sex before some surly 9-year-old gives them an earful.

 

[Herb Alpert]

It's all about balance.
I limit their play time, when it's over it's over, they have to do something else, like play outside, lego, a board game or read a book.
Also I don't want them to play competitive online games. Rocket league was making my 11 year old angry and vindicative. And shooter are out of question.

 

[ZiZ]

When they reach the magic age of 5 I'll take them downstairs and I'll show them the holy land

Well maintained consoles and games from NES to PS5, and Gameboy to Vita/Switch.

Get em in while they are young(can't complain about bad graphics if they were never exposed to the newest stuff), teach them how to be not be sore winners and and how to learn from defeat. Obviously mix this in with teaching them basic human dignity and respect since if it's lacking now, then it must be lacking in the future.

If they want to get into their current gen, they have to beat select games from each era and then beat my ass in Guilty Gear.

Then I'll know they are ready.

Click to shrink...

 

[LaoJim]

- Play games with them.
- Take an active interest in what they are playing.
- Know who their on-line friends are just as you would their off-line friends.
- Try to encourage them to stick with known groups of friends (helps team spirit as well).
- Be open about the dangers of the Internet.
- Gently encourage a balance between multi-player and single player games.
- Have clear rules for what personal information can and can't be shared with on-line strangers.
- Have family discussions about politics from an early age and establish and defend core values.

 

[Shackleton]

I think the key is just to stay involved in the what they play.
I am quite cautious in letting my kids (aged 8 & 11) play online games. For example they are paying a bit of roblox at the moment, and they have been warned that it is an ideal platform to contact children.
Mostly they don't pay any online games, and I hope that will continue. Some of their friends play things like fortnight, but I think I will hold things like that off for a while. Because I am into gaming we have a LOT of games so as there is plenty of fun single player alternatives, they don't feel like they missing out.They have both just finished fire emblem and loved it!

I am a teacher (ages 11-18), so I am aware that online gaming is likely to end up an important part of socialising at school and "fitting in", so I know it is not something we can put off forever, I also know they as children become teenagers their ability to listen to their parents decreases. I think the key is to maintain a trusting relationship where they tell you what is going on.

 

[Gnorman]

I've always taught my kids that the Internet is full of weirdos, nobheads and pedos. They are 16 and 14 now, my sage advice served them well. 😂

 

[Zaki2407]

Social media is way more harmful than gaming. Better to give them a console than a phone these days.

Click to shrink...

This.

 

[Ostron]

I think many tend to put too much trust into monitoring apps. It's likely that we won't understand or know about the things our kids interact with, i.e. something might seem harmless on a surface level where our knowledge ends.

Best way to stay safe is always to interact and be a part of your child's multimedia-life. Ask questions and stay interested, learn about what they're doing and try to be a part of it. Don't use it as a babysitter while you're off doing something else just to check the logs afterwards.

It is of course worth focusing on video games in particular since our kids will inherit our habits to some degree. As has been pointed out video games are part of a bigger picture where self-esteem and trust in a parent will determine what our kids will and will not share with us. Physical or digital a child needs to share their experiences good and bad in order to get support and guidance.

 

[Aliand]

No online games for my kids. Only local coop.
No shooters, only games approved by me.

I stay with them when they play anything. In the future I'll put age restriction to ensure they don't get to play Fortnite and co and online will anyways be banned for them.

 

[brainchild]

- Play games with them.
- Take an active interest in what they are playing.
- Know who their on-line friends are just as you would their off-line friends.
- Try to encourage them to stick with known groups of friends (helps team spirit as well).
- Be open about the dangers of the Internet.
- Gently encourage a balance between multi-player and single player games.
- Have clear rules for what personal information can and can't be shared with on-line strangers.
- Have family discussions about politics from an early age and establish and defend core values.

Click to shrink...

These are all great tips and things I've done raising my kids in an increasingly dangerous environment within the gaming community.

 

[PaulloDEC]

No online games.

 

[Lynd]

No prob, obviously starting from the NES it'll be a good 30 years or so till they catch up to current gen.

 

[discotrigger]

Single player games are where it's at, so there's not much to lose by cutting your kids off from online gaming communities until they're mature enough. Even then, I'd recommend against games with voice chat or any potentially toxic channel of communication as that will preserve your mental health at any age. Also, let's just be honest, most online games are of middling quality and there's plenty of good stuff to play locally even if multiplayer is still important to you.

 

[Bulby]

Most games are fine, just keep them off the fucking internet.

 

[Shirkelton]

Planet's dyin', Cloud. I'm not having children.

 

[brainchild]

I can only speak to Fortnite here, but I will occasionally play squad games with randoms and I seriously haven't heard anyone use voice chat in that game in like 3 seasons. Literally nobody talks.

Click to shrink...

That's because they're on discord. Discord is what you really have to watch out for. I've had to have more than a few serious conversations with my youngest son about the toxic shit he was getting involved in and some other stuff that raised red flags. Parents definitely need to be talking to their kids about the friendships they develop online, no matter how much you trust them.

 

[AIan]

I'd argue it's more the internet than video games. Internet has never been faster and accessible in more countries and regions than before, meaning you can find almost anyone online now. We still have huge hit single-player games like Breath of the Wild and Super Mario Odyssey, but it is true that Fortnite is incredibly popular. Still, I feel most kids are protected through those kinds of online games unless their parents simply didn't teach them well enough. Heck, social media platforms are significantly more dangerous than games like Fortnite and Minecraft imo. So many creepers lurk Instagram for example.

 

[Grips]

I learned alot about racism and the far right by playing WoW back in the days (04-07) irony or not the chat was wild.
Im playing through Classic this year and sadly nothing has changed.
I presume its the anonimity and ease of communication.

 

[Opposable]

I would worry more about platforms such as tiktok or instagram rather than the medium of video games tbh

 

[Deleted member 20831]

Wait, what!

It isn't specifically Video Games, its the social platform/interaction tied to the media (almost all the time).

 

[Slacker247]

I'll probably curate what they play very heavily. A lot of "Pick any game-except that one...nope, not that one either..." (though actually I have few COD/GTA-like games).

Around 6 or so I might let them play something like Fortnite, but will monitor it/disable voice chat etc. It really depends, because I think there is some degree of flexibility e.g. if it's just a party with their friends I've met fine, I can probably be OK with it. Randoms? Nah, kid!

Part of me has no plans to introduce them to anything past PS2 until they're well in their teens, just because so many darn kids "can't play 2D games!" because it's old or some poor excuse, ugh.

 

[Sanka]

Instill in them the right values, educate them about the dangers they might come across and hope for the best. That's all you can do really. If your kid wants to join one of these groups it will do so without you knowing about it. Everyone has phones and internet access.

Might also be important to make sure that your kid's friends are being taught the same thing. Either do it yourself or talk with their parents and see if they are alright. Try to make sure they grow up in a diverse environment.

 

[Ostron]

-Hey [name of kid], what games do you have?
- Maximo and the Army Zin on PS2!
- What?? Here jack into Insane Murder Crime instead!
- No, my parent has exquisite taste in video games and I have no interest in being accepted by my peers!
- We totally respect that!