Soo over this past weekend I had sex with a straight bestfriend, he tells me to just forget about it because he was really drunk, which is hard to do because he know I've been pretty much crushing on him hard for a long time. I've read so much shit about every gay person falling for a straight person, but it really doesn't help that we had sex. I feel so angry with the world for putting me in this position, also him technically being my first is killing me. What do I do?
I'm not in the same situation yet but I fully understand how you feel :-/
There is this straight guy that me and my friends met at a night club we are going now and then. He is really a cool married (!) guy who has no issues with
dancing with guys (me). Last summer again in that club he heard from a friend of mine I am gay. His reaction was "that's cool, I have zero problems with that. I could kiss a guy and it wouldn't bother me". And just like that he kissed me. My first kiss with a man (I know I'm late, whatever).
We danced that night and had great fun.
I was thinking about the kiss weeks later but I knew he was just having fun. I didn't have any hopes or desires. It was just the kiss I couldn't forget. I liked it. Not because of the men behind the lips.
Two months later we met at the same club.
I was so wasted I remember like 10% of the whole night.
I remember kissing and dancing with him. At some point, I remember, he touched me between my legs. I don't have any other memories. Thankfully at some point my mind was clearer and i found my friends in another hall and we left.
Next day my friends told me it was to much for them to stay with us. That's why they went to the other hall (+ another friend was behaving shitty). And they told me that the straight guy was also crazy drunk.
Me and my friends, and that straight guy will be at that night club next month.
I don't want to stop going there and miss the fun with my friends.
I'm not sure why that guy did all of that with me. Does he want to try a guy? Is he unhappy in his marriage?
I'm so confused right now.
The good guy in me says: stay away. You don't want to (possibly) destroy a marriage.
The 29 year old virgin in me says: take your chance. You are single and not responsible for the mistakes others do.
And I'm also angry about the whole situation. Why must he be straight & married? After all these years of waiting and searching for a gay men who is attracted to me, why did I have to be in this situation with this guy?
I was thinking about meeting him at the club next month and talk about what happened. But it could be a weird talk with unpleasant consequences.
Maybe it's the best to just see what happens.
What boggles my mind is: what if he wants to have sex? Will I be strong enough to do the right thing and say no? Or horny enough to forget what's right? Will I regret it?
What is the right thing to do anyways?
He is drinking and partying all the time without his wife. He told me once his wife didn't like all of this, that's why she stayed home and give him permission to have fun.
But, how much fun did she allow? Wouldn't his wife know that he could be (or is?) having sex with others?
Sorry for the long post. I read PixelatedDonut's post and had the strong need to talk about it.
I would understand if you would ignore my post. Any advice is of course welcome.