As the tittle says, we started our relationship on January 5th 2019 and let me tell you it was a great relationship we really loved each other, we had respect, love, care etc
we did all kind of things together, she is younger than me (she is 22 I'm 25, she is still at the university I have been working for over 10 years) I can't explain enough how I gave her everything I had and so does she
But everything changed once the covid pandemic started, I decided that we shouldn't see each other on persone due to the risks of getting covid and we both agreed, from March 2020 to August we did not see each other only on videocalls, watching movies together online, calls etc, after 5 months I went to see her in person for the first time in 5 months because it was her birthday
When it comes to the economic side she is in a good position with a wealthy family (not rich but she doesn't need to worry about anything if you know what I mean and I'm glad it's that way)
On my case like I said I started working when I was 14 years old, I have ups and downs when it comes to the money and I have to take care of my family (mother, 2 cats and 5 dogs) that means food, rent, bills etc) all my savings are pretty much gone, that's why I was and I'm still worried if my mother or myself get covid and need treatment I will not be able to afford it
The mother of my ex gf did got covid but thankfully she recovered, of course it was expensive but like I said no problems there
On September 2020 we had a talk about she not feeling good on the course of our relationship, that may be I did had experience on long distance relationships (my past relationship was a long distance one we lasted 1 years and 7 months with only 2 weeks tops of seeing each other) but that she did not, I did an effort to try to make up the things and I proposed to see each other 2 times per month until things get better but I couldn't keep it and after the first month I returned to the 1 visit per month (she lives in Mexico city I live 30kms away from Mexico city or like 1 hour drive)
things didn't seem to improve much but I tried to improve them, sadly her grandmother passed away at the beginning of the year due to cancer, there was memorial or wake service sorry I don't know the right word on English and a funeral with a lot of members of her family, even with all the red flags of catching covid on those events, I went to stay with her during all the ceremonies, I didn't wanted her to be alone
On February I decided with my mother a plan to see my girlfriend 2 times per month (I will visit her first and then she would come to my house) and I talked to her about this but she didn't liked that I set up a plan without talking with her, because the relationship it's only between the 2 of us not the 3, like I say I'm the one responsible for the money on my house and this has affected seriously everything (even to me)
Fast forward to the start of March we had another talk like September and she was very worry and not all right with how everything was going and I noticed how badly things were now, together we setup a plan to indeed see each other for 2 times or even 3 times per month, weekly online date etc and I thought it was going well but on the last week she became very cold, on March 31st we had a date planned, she would come to my house and she did came but to say that things were over and after a few hours of talking she returned to her home...
I was thinking it was the beginning of healing and improving the relationship, I even said to her that I would visit here next week and I had a lot of plans setup
I have this feeling of ending the relationship on a premature state but she said she hasn't felt good for over a lot of months or even 1 year
We talked a little bit more on the phone yesterday and today, she insists that I'm a wonderful man, that I'm enough, that it was not my fault but that the circumstances were simply enough and she didn't felt good anymore, that our ways are no longer on the same direction and that's not good, that I have a lot of priorities and responsibilities to take care of and she simply didn't felt like one of the anymore
I feel awful, you have no idea how happy I was and damn it I know the two of us were happy, never in my life I have felt like that and you can bet I gave everything that I have to her
unlike my previous and first relationship I don't know how can I recover from this one, she was the love of my life, I really do feel and believe that but I have go knowing that I simply
wasn't enough for her, she insists it's not that but well that's how I feel, love is not for me, like a mexican song says "we all know how to care each other but only a few know how to love, because love is to suffer" :(
P.S sorry if I made grammar mistakes, English is not my native language and I feel awful right now
we did all kind of things together, she is younger than me (she is 22 I'm 25, she is still at the university I have been working for over 10 years) I can't explain enough how I gave her everything I had and so does she
But everything changed once the covid pandemic started, I decided that we shouldn't see each other on persone due to the risks of getting covid and we both agreed, from March 2020 to August we did not see each other only on videocalls, watching movies together online, calls etc, after 5 months I went to see her in person for the first time in 5 months because it was her birthday
When it comes to the economic side she is in a good position with a wealthy family (not rich but she doesn't need to worry about anything if you know what I mean and I'm glad it's that way)
On my case like I said I started working when I was 14 years old, I have ups and downs when it comes to the money and I have to take care of my family (mother, 2 cats and 5 dogs) that means food, rent, bills etc) all my savings are pretty much gone, that's why I was and I'm still worried if my mother or myself get covid and need treatment I will not be able to afford it
The mother of my ex gf did got covid but thankfully she recovered, of course it was expensive but like I said no problems there
On September 2020 we had a talk about she not feeling good on the course of our relationship, that may be I did had experience on long distance relationships (my past relationship was a long distance one we lasted 1 years and 7 months with only 2 weeks tops of seeing each other) but that she did not, I did an effort to try to make up the things and I proposed to see each other 2 times per month until things get better but I couldn't keep it and after the first month I returned to the 1 visit per month (she lives in Mexico city I live 30kms away from Mexico city or like 1 hour drive)
things didn't seem to improve much but I tried to improve them, sadly her grandmother passed away at the beginning of the year due to cancer, there was memorial or wake service sorry I don't know the right word on English and a funeral with a lot of members of her family, even with all the red flags of catching covid on those events, I went to stay with her during all the ceremonies, I didn't wanted her to be alone
On February I decided with my mother a plan to see my girlfriend 2 times per month (I will visit her first and then she would come to my house) and I talked to her about this but she didn't liked that I set up a plan without talking with her, because the relationship it's only between the 2 of us not the 3, like I say I'm the one responsible for the money on my house and this has affected seriously everything (even to me)
Fast forward to the start of March we had another talk like September and she was very worry and not all right with how everything was going and I noticed how badly things were now, together we setup a plan to indeed see each other for 2 times or even 3 times per month, weekly online date etc and I thought it was going well but on the last week she became very cold, on March 31st we had a date planned, she would come to my house and she did came but to say that things were over and after a few hours of talking she returned to her home...
I was thinking it was the beginning of healing and improving the relationship, I even said to her that I would visit here next week and I had a lot of plans setup
I have this feeling of ending the relationship on a premature state but she said she hasn't felt good for over a lot of months or even 1 year
We talked a little bit more on the phone yesterday and today, she insists that I'm a wonderful man, that I'm enough, that it was not my fault but that the circumstances were simply enough and she didn't felt good anymore, that our ways are no longer on the same direction and that's not good, that I have a lot of priorities and responsibilities to take care of and she simply didn't felt like one of the anymore
I feel awful, you have no idea how happy I was and damn it I know the two of us were happy, never in my life I have felt like that and you can bet I gave everything that I have to her
unlike my previous and first relationship I don't know how can I recover from this one, she was the love of my life, I really do feel and believe that but I have go knowing that I simply
wasn't enough for her, she insists it's not that but well that's how I feel, love is not for me, like a mexican song says "we all know how to care each other but only a few know how to love, because love is to suffer" :(
P.S sorry if I made grammar mistakes, English is not my native language and I feel awful right now