My title fucked up while typing on my phone :(
This link is something very very relatable to me. The American Dream is a farce and life is too short to just wither here for the rest of my life.
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entr...nt-be-coming-back_us_5adf7407e4b07be4d4c57b26
I'm living and working a pretty good corporate job and yet several family tragedies, medical expenses, and hostile work life balance culture in the US is pushing me and my spouse to our breaking points here.
I want to rant about how I basically every time I leave the US to another developed or closely-developing country, I have a PTSD-caliber bout of panic and dread when I have to get back on the plane to go back to the US and its culture, politics, and social systems.
Last time I went to France (my second visit) I had a breakdown and cried softly in a corner next to a statue at a museum on my last day when I had to go to the airport in a few hours. Literally on the verge of a panic attack at the idea of going back to Texas where most people around me are proud of their bigoted, uneducated society of bad healthcare, anti-socialism, working all year long without guaranteed vacation or benefits and crushing student debt until you die, only to be made bankrupt at the slightest life circumstance. And for what? Watching most of the French value culture, history, education, and a sense of social purpose and unity with their fellow countrymen was something I was extremely attracted to. It made going back to the extreme LIE of the American Dream unbearable.
But you (I) go back. You settle back into the monotony of American middle class life. The neurotic budgeting of every little expense to try to make ends meet. $600 for public university student loans. $500 for a car loan and insurance because your city doesn't have public transit. $1000-2000 for rent or mortgage. My husband is a public school teacher who pays $600 fucking dollars a month for an Aetna HMO with almost no doctors available and an $8,000 deductible. Where does all the money in the US middle class paycheck go? You just fall back into the monotony of accepting that life sucks. You're there to work 40-60 hours a week if you're lucky or juggle 2-3 jobs to afford a lack of benefits if you're not. You become numb to the concept that life should be enjoyed. You just age. At least that's my experience.
Now I'm on another trip. I visited family in Colombia and enjoyed a beautiful culture of warm people, good food, and surprisingly decent social benefits for a country that have survived 50 years of war and violence. I was in the car on the way to a flight back from Colombia to the US. I'm a dual citizen. I was talking to my family and getting angry as they told me that it only costs $50 per month for the basic fucking access to a (honestly not great, but it's something) pension at 55 years old, decent risk insurance, and full health coverage where you don't pay more than like $100 a year for any total of health expenses. A $200 inhaler in the US costs $20 here. $18 in cold medicine is $4 here. The system covers most costs. And after dealing with the expensive nightmare of the healthcare system in the US for elders and caregiving, I don't want to grow old there when in Colombia I could doctors and nurses come take care of me in my home when I'm old. And that's not even considering other costs of living that I feel robbed on...good internet, TV, and cell phone may not cost more than $50 per month together. I'm here with two lines at T-mobile for almost $150, and my service is garbage.
Colombia has many problems and I'm not a fan of the president they just elected, but I'm bitter that even the country I fled in the 90s has a more human system and culture than whatever ignorance we're breeding stateside.
Being back in Colombia, my anxiety symptoms softened. My palpitations eased with the warmth of good food, nice people, and beautiful culture of living life peacefully. Much like I saw with the French. And the Spanish. And most countries in Europe I've visited.
Every time I leave the US I'm fatally close to a spastic scene of quitting my job and draining my 401k and just LEAVING. The middle class is disappearing and the situation is oppressively expensive. Cops are shooting people down and we are working to pay bills, try to avoid bankruptcy from debts, and then you die.
I just wanted to rant that I'm dreading going back. Does anyone else feel this way? Has anyone here moved out of the US and felt an immense sense of relief?
I have some really special medical problems AND I'm gay married so I need to plan for if I move out of the US, but trips away from the states inspire me to begin planning now.
This link is something very very relatable to me. The American Dream is a farce and life is too short to just wither here for the rest of my life.
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entr...nt-be-coming-back_us_5adf7407e4b07be4d4c57b26
I'm living and working a pretty good corporate job and yet several family tragedies, medical expenses, and hostile work life balance culture in the US is pushing me and my spouse to our breaking points here.
I want to rant about how I basically every time I leave the US to another developed or closely-developing country, I have a PTSD-caliber bout of panic and dread when I have to get back on the plane to go back to the US and its culture, politics, and social systems.
Last time I went to France (my second visit) I had a breakdown and cried softly in a corner next to a statue at a museum on my last day when I had to go to the airport in a few hours. Literally on the verge of a panic attack at the idea of going back to Texas where most people around me are proud of their bigoted, uneducated society of bad healthcare, anti-socialism, working all year long without guaranteed vacation or benefits and crushing student debt until you die, only to be made bankrupt at the slightest life circumstance. And for what? Watching most of the French value culture, history, education, and a sense of social purpose and unity with their fellow countrymen was something I was extremely attracted to. It made going back to the extreme LIE of the American Dream unbearable.
But you (I) go back. You settle back into the monotony of American middle class life. The neurotic budgeting of every little expense to try to make ends meet. $600 for public university student loans. $500 for a car loan and insurance because your city doesn't have public transit. $1000-2000 for rent or mortgage. My husband is a public school teacher who pays $600 fucking dollars a month for an Aetna HMO with almost no doctors available and an $8,000 deductible. Where does all the money in the US middle class paycheck go? You just fall back into the monotony of accepting that life sucks. You're there to work 40-60 hours a week if you're lucky or juggle 2-3 jobs to afford a lack of benefits if you're not. You become numb to the concept that life should be enjoyed. You just age. At least that's my experience.
Now I'm on another trip. I visited family in Colombia and enjoyed a beautiful culture of warm people, good food, and surprisingly decent social benefits for a country that have survived 50 years of war and violence. I was in the car on the way to a flight back from Colombia to the US. I'm a dual citizen. I was talking to my family and getting angry as they told me that it only costs $50 per month for the basic fucking access to a (honestly not great, but it's something) pension at 55 years old, decent risk insurance, and full health coverage where you don't pay more than like $100 a year for any total of health expenses. A $200 inhaler in the US costs $20 here. $18 in cold medicine is $4 here. The system covers most costs. And after dealing with the expensive nightmare of the healthcare system in the US for elders and caregiving, I don't want to grow old there when in Colombia I could doctors and nurses come take care of me in my home when I'm old. And that's not even considering other costs of living that I feel robbed on...good internet, TV, and cell phone may not cost more than $50 per month together. I'm here with two lines at T-mobile for almost $150, and my service is garbage.
Colombia has many problems and I'm not a fan of the president they just elected, but I'm bitter that even the country I fled in the 90s has a more human system and culture than whatever ignorance we're breeding stateside.
Being back in Colombia, my anxiety symptoms softened. My palpitations eased with the warmth of good food, nice people, and beautiful culture of living life peacefully. Much like I saw with the French. And the Spanish. And most countries in Europe I've visited.
Every time I leave the US I'm fatally close to a spastic scene of quitting my job and draining my 401k and just LEAVING. The middle class is disappearing and the situation is oppressively expensive. Cops are shooting people down and we are working to pay bills, try to avoid bankruptcy from debts, and then you die.
I just wanted to rant that I'm dreading going back. Does anyone else feel this way? Has anyone here moved out of the US and felt an immense sense of relief?
I have some really special medical problems AND I'm gay married so I need to plan for if I move out of the US, but trips away from the states inspire me to begin planning now.
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