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Henry Cavill: Hesitant to date in fear of being called a rapist
- Thread starter rude
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I think his point is that with context, it's possible to give the guy a little bit of the benefit of the doubt. It really seems like he chose the wrong words and his meaning is being misconstrued. Taken at face value, I agree with you. Nothing of what he said is correct. But the dude is known to be a genuinely kind person. Of course, I guess it could all be a cover for a truly sickening human being deserving of the vitriol in this thread.
full quote not even shedding him tiny a good light, he reminiscing the good ol' days, no doesn't really means no, stuff like that...
Any criticism, no matter how minor, inevitably met with: witch hunt, crucifixion, burning at the stake.
Fun times.
Fun times.
But doesn't he imply that he's over that now? It seemed to me like he was saying he enjoyed aspects of the good ol days in terms of the courting of women, but has now backed away from that after realizing it's probably not a good thing to do anymore. That's how I took it.
"Now? Now you really can't pursue someone further than, 'No'. It's like, 'OK, cool'.
This line alone, at least to me, implies he's on board with the "no means I'm not interested" straight up. He even says, "Ok, cool". As in, "I'm done asking". Am I reading this wrong?
I'll be happy to discuss it. I have for a few pages now.
There's a reason that people do everything they do. It doesn't make that reason good. People justify sexual assault or going on shooting sprees and do it for "reasons that make sense to them", but if the justification isn't good (which it never would be), then the justification doesn't really matter. The same applies for this behaviour.
I hate to tell these hypothetical women in your scenario the reality of the world, but putting yourself out there sometimes sucks. Not just for them, for everyone. Women "play hard to get", men rely on "pickup artistry" for the equally unintuitive reason of trying to shield themselves from being hurt, which is still totally inevitable. Always. It just becomes an arms race that no one ever wins. So if its purpose doesn't actually work, there's really no point in doing it, both for women and for men.
I am well aware that it happens. Doesn't make it right and doesn't mean that we should continue to feed into that behaviour just because they want to keep doing it.
See above, re: "hard-to-get"/"pickup artistry" arms race.
Also, if a woman is a feminist, she should clearly know she has the right to say no and still be comfortable in her feminism. The guy is just a PUA douche. That's not a difficult idea to move past.
People who crave complication and abstraction in life like you seem to always strike me as enjoying misery, both their own and the misery of others. I have nothing to say on your commentary, because it's laughably simplistic, but felt an urge to make that observation.
Then he continue with the hyperbole that became the headline
"Oh why'd you give up?' And it's like, 'Well, because I didn't want to go to jail?'"
I don't know how this can be anything than he sounds like he antagonizing the current climate
What the fuck...
this sentence wrap the article perfectly
"Imaginations have made Paul Walker's indiscretions untouchable."
User Banned (Permanent): Downplaying sexism, thread whining, history of bigoted remarks.
I know I'm going to get banner for this, I don't really care.
This forum has become a caricarure of Neogaf. Everything is related to fucking polítical correctness, social justice warrios, social media activists.
This thread is an example of that, this has become ridiculous.
Everything is us vs them, everything is black or white. Users are warned because they somehow "understand" Cavill's words (really?!) . If you don't post something politically correct you are warned or banned.
You don't see ir because you all feel like the good guys, fighting for the good cause. But you are becoming the enemy and sooner or later you will see it.
The funny thing is... Neogaf opened my eyes to social injustices, to understand minorities better, to be more empathic. I learned a lot, but since this places opened, slowly became a joke.
And now thanks to a lot of some of you, I started to become tired is reading the same bullshit over and over again, "they are the bad guys, we are the good ones! BTW good job punching that person because he thinks different than us (remember, we are the good ones!).
Cavill is dead to me! (See guys! I'm making social activism from my iphone!)
What a joke.
This forum has become a caricarure of Neogaf. Everything is related to fucking polítical correctness, social justice warrios, social media activists.
This thread is an example of that, this has become ridiculous.
Everything is us vs them, everything is black or white. Users are warned because they somehow "understand" Cavill's words (really?!) . If you don't post something politically correct you are warned or banned.
You don't see ir because you all feel like the good guys, fighting for the good cause. But you are becoming the enemy and sooner or later you will see it.
The funny thing is... Neogaf opened my eyes to social injustices, to understand minorities better, to be more empathic. I learned a lot, but since this places opened, slowly became a joke.
And now thanks to a lot of some of you, I started to become tired is reading the same bullshit over and over again, "they are the bad guys, we are the good ones! BTW good job punching that person because he thinks different than us (remember, we are the good ones!).
Cavill is dead to me! (See guys! I'm making social activism from my iphone!)
What a joke.
A discussion about Henry Cavills statements about fake sexual assualt allegations and the metoo movement. Also a general discussion about sexual assault and sexual assault allegations. Framing a normal adult relationship as something it's not and insinuating it's proof of his attitude and actions towards women isn't helpful.
Literal nazis deserve to be punched. How can you argue otherwise?
Reads like his talking from personal experience,
His Henry Cavill not Bob from Dover. Being aware of your fame makes you question how you actions can be seen in the public .. again he says this in the actual article. If his own take on it is I don't want to approach someone and they get the wrong idea then has the message not been heard. He does not sound like his complaining at all .. again he even says it in the article that mens behaviour towards women needs to change , take out the bad habits and leave in the good.
You can't possibly tell me that's bad. Someone knowing their boundaries.
Yeah, I agree that last comment is what started the whole thread, but like you said, it was such a hyperbolic statement that it's kind of tongue in cheek. In my mind, that "bad joke" doesn't negate everything he said before that in admitting he's changing his views and is on the side of the good fight. I think we both agree that he should not have said that and it hurts his message.
i was expecting for this reply lol
not that i disagree, but yeah, these threads are very predictable
Some people deserve to be punched, don't know what to tell you.
Topics like these are really good for pink-fishing. They always bring out the shitheads.
LMAO. OK. Congrats on the banner here on the caricarure.
Yes you care, if you didn't care you wouldn't make the post. And comparing this to GAF a site where the owner was a shady dude that banned you because you wasn't agree with him is more justice? Come on dude, that place was an eco chamber tailored to make great a SINGLE dude. At least here you get a warning, no site is perfect but here you can have your voice if you are respectful with others, common compassion.
edit: can you imagine if you don't get banned? I think you are bating and provoking dude.
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....good for you? Surprised this didnt end with and this is why we I'm voting for trump
He worded that abysmally, but I understand what he's getting at.
Guys are afraid that their intentions will be misconstrued when all they're trying to do is woo a girl.
Guys are afraid that their intentions will be misconstrued when all they're trying to do is woo a girl.
Isn't that what Cavill is essentially saying?
When a woman says no, he respects it but then afterwards soem ask him why he gave up. While his answer "I don't want to go to jail/be a rapist" may be a bit extreme, had he pursued it and she really wasn'T interested, she would have been within her rights to take him to courts for sexual harrasement.
I have a similar stance, if she says no, then I move on and just forget about it and truth be told, sometimes I've been asked why I gave up and stopped pursuing her. Unlike Cavill though, I just say "You said no and no means no, so I respected that and moved on".
From experience, let me say: It isn't that hard to try to court someone and not come off like a fucking rapist. All of this shit is some slippery sloping-ass fearmongering garbage.
Haha, it's all in the chase? If they say "no" enough times, maybe just stop.
"There's something wonderful about a man chasing a woman. There's a traditional approach to that, which is nice. I think a woman should be wooed and chased, but maybe I'm old-fashioned for thinking that.
"It's very difficult to do that if there are certain rules in place. Because then it's like: 'Well, I don't want to go up and talk to her, because I'm going to be called a rapist or something'. So you're like, 'Forget it, I'm going to call an ex-girlfriend instead, and then just go back to a relationship, which never really worked'. But it's way safer than casting myself into the fires of hell, because I'm someone in the public eye, and if I go and flirt with someone, then who knows what's going to happen?"
Those are his literal words. If you can't see what they say, you're blind.
"It's very difficult to do that if there are certain rules in place." Oh no; women have more agency now. Can't woo them too hard.
Sorry, but can you clarify this? Because as typed it looks like "Resetera has no room for bigots, but we gotta have some space for discussing kinda-bigotry." It's just kind of unclear.
Actually this is something Resetera has yet to improve. Not all things are black and white. Resetera should stand against bigotry, sexism, racism, or various kinds of hate speech. But yet at the same time it has to spare a room for the other side of coin (this doesnt apply to topic dicussing about bigotry, sexism, and racism)
If his experience is he's been in many situations where "No" was followed by "Why'd You Stop?" ... ok, I mean it's kinda hard to say "no, that's not how it works". It may be that he is in that situation more than a few times but I don't really take too much from his comments because his situation is simply pretty specific and not the norm for most people.
He is a movie star, handsome, etc. there's probably a good chance any room he walks into in public there's a couple of women (and men) that would like to hook up with him or have a relationship, and some want him to chase and he gets some mixed signals. OK, fine. I do think though it's a pretty dumb thing to say in an interview.
He is a movie star, handsome, etc. there's probably a good chance any room he walks into in public there's a couple of women (and men) that would like to hook up with him or have a relationship, and some want him to chase and he gets some mixed signals. OK, fine. I do think though it's a pretty dumb thing to say in an interview.
A lot of overreactions in here for what I think is simply a lack of eloquence on Cavill's part.
I'm sure as an A-list Hollywood actor you do have to be careful whom you date, and be legitimately concerned whether your advances might be mistaken as something more lecherous than what they actually are. I also have to assume that he's had some past experience that shaped this viewpoint.
I'm sure as an A-list Hollywood actor you do have to be careful whom you date, and be legitimately concerned whether your advances might be mistaken as something more lecherous than what they actually are. I also have to assume that he's had some past experience that shaped this viewpoint.
I can't help but imagining something bullshit like saying "hey babe, wanna had good times" is about the only thing that made you came of as frigging rapist, and quite frankly you does came off as shady guy.. even then most police won't take kind of report seriously despite maybe they should.
Dude, I agree with you, but I am very close with girls who want guys to chase them, and want them to ask multiple times.
I can't make this shit up. Not everyone is on the same page. I was with a girl who said to me during sex "I don't think we should do this" so I stopped immediately. She then got pissed at me and said I wasn't supposed to listen to her.
A great many women are wonderful, level headed people that experience terrible things everyday, and then you meet people like the girl above.
If your advances can be perceived as lecherous
maybe don't be lecherous in your advances.
Why is this hard, and why do you assume this is harder for A-listers? If they're so fucking famous that sex is easily thrown at them, why should they expect an easier time trying to secure it?
It's kind of ironic to quote him in a conversation about this, but there was a Louis CK bit about this. The woman wanted him to be more forceful when she rejected his advances and he called out how stupid that was.
Ultimately this is why talking about your desires openly is a good thing. Having one to get chased but not letting a suitor know is a recipe for disaster.
Probably yes, but I do think his point about being told no and then being told "why'd you stop?" is probably something that does happen a lot to him moreso than "average dude at the bar".
A lot of women probably want to sleep with him, but they don't want to come off as one night stands or invalidate the possibility of a real relationship, so they want to make him chase at least a little bit.
His basically saying a bastardised version of this. And if sex is thrown at them it's a much harder time trying to secure it , not everyone wants a relationship and Henry is looking for a relationship he even says it in the article. His selective over who he wants to be with .
No. I think you literally misunderstood everything. I said we should not have any space for bigotry, but we should have more room for arguments outside of bigotry topic especially to those black and white topics that do not have relation at all with bigotry topic including sexism and racism.
As an example, I showed a controversial opinion about star wars but i was judged as a troll for having that opinion literally in this forum (which turns out people misunderstood my statement due to ambiguous situation)
Let's take another far worse example (this one is fiction). Let's say a person murders someone for killing his dog, would you stand against the victim? Or against the murderer? This kind of topic attracts two sides of story. Of course the murderer is in the wrong here but there are some people will understand why he does that
Is it that difficult to say "I'm in it for the sex" or "I'm looking for a relationship"? Even if it's the former and unspoken, is it that hard the next morning to bring up the latter? The entire culture around Tinder and other hookup apps make this stuff clear. His selectivity is painting himself into a corner because he seemingly wants an antiquated chase but can't find it.
To that I say "Grow up, Henry."
Yeah, that's cool, I get you. Star Wars topics are a goddamn disaster here (and everywhere else, too). I'm just wondering what stance on this topic in that other person's post you said should be debatable.
Completely agree. Being open and up front is the best policy. Some people just love the intrigue I guess??
I know a girl who turned down a dude for literal YEARS. She finally relented, went out on a date with him, they fell in love, got married, and have a big family now.
She considers that a great love story to tell people. :/
Someone is always chasing, the other stuff is on him. I wasn't supporting sexual assault I did not see that part.
