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I've just been told she faked most of her orgasms

Zen

Zen

The Wise Ones
Member
Nov 1, 2017
9,662
I feel gut punched, but I guess I can understand the desire not to kill my pride. At the same time, it's been going on since we first started dating and I only find out now. I wasted so much effort trying to make her feel good all this time and now it comes out it was mostly false positives. I need tips for future reference Era. What's your success rate and how do you do it? For girl Era, how does your SO drive you to warp speed?
 

Deleted member 2809

User requested account closure
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
25,478
Nyeh, some girls come like crazy and for some it takes huge amounts of work
Just talk about it really
 
Kaiken

Kaiken

Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,182
About 75 percent of woman will never orgasm. Don't worry OP, I have a decent success rate... or so they say.
 
RadioJoNES

RadioJoNES

Prophet of Truth - One Winged Slayer
Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
1,879
To be fair it's mostly on her for not being open about it earlier.
 
B-Dubs

B-Dubs

That's some catch, that catch-22
General Manager
Oct 25, 2017
32,794
Ask her what she likes, what she does to herself to get there. You gotta communicate. Don't feel bad, just find out how to do better. Presuming this wasn't a breakup insult.
 
rhydon321

rhydon321

User requested ban
Banned
Oct 30, 2017
148
As everyone else said, communication is definitely key. Encourage her to give you feedback during so you can hone in on what she likes.
 
nasirum

nasirum

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,833
Somewhere
You gotta start being open and communicative during sex.

She's gonna have to guide you.

Also, maybe get mechanical help - in my experience, some girls need that.
 
JeTmAn

JeTmAn

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
3,825
It happens to the best of us

tenor.gif
 
The Futurist

The Futurist

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
436
You don't need tips from us, you need tips from her.

Ask her exactly what you need to do. Tell her to spell it out. Not too difficult.
 
Masterspeed

Masterspeed

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,826
England
Talk to her. Ask her what it will take to GET her there. Change it up, spend time on her for a while before getting down to business. Sex is fun, do what you both can so you both have fun.
 
Keyframe

Keyframe

Member
Oct 29, 2017
1,728
Literally every girl is different so you need to find what works with the girl you are with.

Protip: Your dick don't matter. You have to mentally turn on a girl for the real, earth shaking orgasms.
 
Chamaeleonx

Chamaeleonx

Banned
Oct 27, 2017
2,348
Zen said:
I feel gut punched, but I guess I can understand the desire not to kill my pride. At the same time, it's been going on since we first started dating and I only find out now. I wasted so much effort trying to make her feel good all this time and now it comes out it was mostly false positives. I need tips for future reference Era. What's your success rate and how do you do it? For girl Era, how does your SO drive you to warp speed?
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Personally I would say try playing with the clit while you are thrusting. Also, don't just stop once you got her to the top, you need to keep riding that wave even if she says she can't do it anymore (her body will most likely keep going).

Shugga said:
Nyeh, some girls come like crazy and for some it takes huge amounts of work
Just talk about it really
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This is also good advice.
Talk about it, some need more work than others. Helps if she has tried different toys before and actually knows what gets her excited. Otherwise you will have to search as it could be anything.
 
pokeystaples

pokeystaples

Member
Oct 27, 2017
5,363
Have you tried talking to her about it? Asking her what she likes and what you do on the occasions she does have an orgasm so you can build from there?

I don't orgasm with my partner every single time, but I never fake it. We both understand that sometimes being close is enough.

Oheao said:
If this is true, it really lowers my desire to have sex. Like, what's the point if both sides aren't enjoying it?
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Not having an orgasm does not mean the other party doesn't enjoy things. Sex is fun.
 
random_polymath

random_polymath

Banned
Oct 27, 2017
679
This doesn't have to be about you.

Some women don't orgasm with other people. I had a partner that wouldn't even have orgasms in our threesomes with my wife nor with another couple she played with. She could only have an orgasm on her own.

Orgasming is psychological.
 
C.Mongler

C.Mongler

The Fallen
Oct 27, 2017
3,881
Washington, DC
This has happened to me before OP. How did I fix it? Communication. Ask her. Talk to her while you do your thing. Ask her if what you're doing feels good. Nothing anybody on here could tell you will be useful to you, as every person has their own preferences. You have to learn what her's are.
 
Mesoian

Mesoian

▲ Legend ▲
Member
Oct 28, 2017
26,577
Zen said:
I feel gut punched, but I guess I can understand the desire not to kill my pride. At the same time, it's been going on since we first started dating and I only find out now. I wasted so much effort trying to make her feel good all this time and now it comes out it was mostly false positives. I need tips for future reference Era. What's your success rate and how do you do it? For girl Era, how does your SO drive you to warp speed?
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Click to shrink...
You should have been talking about this way earlier than now op.
 
Twilight Suzuka

Twilight Suzuka

Banned
Nov 4, 2017
2,203
From my experience its mostly just down to each woman having totally different things that work for them. And for some women, they are not really even sure what works for them.

I've been with a girl that would literally pass out and lose consciousness from repeated orgasms. And I've been with a girl that only had orgasms every other month, was just not that into physical contact in general. I was doing the same routine for both.

The difference can be mental even. Romance, eye contact, timing. Some need toys in addition to their partner and that can be fun if you both get used to it. Its just going to be completely different for each person.

If you were asking what she liked and were receptive to what she said, none of the blame is on you in my opinion. She wasn't open about it at all and deceived you. She didn't communicate what she likes and work on that with you. How could you work on it if she didn't tell you what was happening? It doesn't mean you'll run into this with every partner.
 
Transistor

Transistor

Hollowly Brittle
Administrator
Oct 25, 2017
37,196
Washington, D.C.
Gotta learn to love using that mouth, yo.

Also, you just need to talk to her about it and have her help you realize what gets her off.

Oheao said:
If this is true, it really lowers my desire to have sex. Like, what's the point if both sides aren't enjoying it?
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The statistic is actually that they won't orgasm from penetration

Plenty of other ways to get them off
 
B-Dubs

B-Dubs

That's some catch, that catch-22
General Manager
Oct 25, 2017
32,794
Oheao said:
If this is true, it really lowers my desire to have sex. Like, what's the point if both sides aren't enjoying it?
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Click to shrink...
He's got that statistic wrong. It's 75% of women don't orgasm from penetration alone. Meaning, you gotta do other stuff as well.
 
HylianSeven

HylianSeven

Shin Megami TC - Community Resetter
Member
Oct 25, 2017
19,086
Why don't you just try talking and communicating with her about it?
 
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