ERA, I think we need to talk about Stan Lee's accusations that surfaced in the last days. I'm aware that the source is the Daily Mail and that's completely unreliable. But I think it's important for us to discuss this because of two points:
Stan Lee and Jack Kirby are my heroes. I owe them one awful lot for all that they have created. He will always be important to me. I will always call him my spiritual grandpa and I don't care if he joked about not liking being called a grandpa before. Because he is my spiritual grandpa. He literally gave me a whole lot my entire life and I will always be thankful for that.
With that said, this is not about my obvious bias towards him. If these allegations were about him being a serial sexual predator that preyed upon women like other cases we have happening right now since Harry Weinstein survivors came forward (see also Jesse Lacey and Max Landis) I'd have no qualms on shrugging him off in a heartbeat, regardless how much I literally own him most of my best childhood memories.
Yes, I'm hurt because this old man is getting his name through the mudd in his old age. Is it because I'm a fanboy? No. It's because last year, my actual grandmother passed away. She was 82 years old and had Alzheimer's, and while my generation is tearing my hero and spiritual grandpa apart with no questions asked on social media, very few people are talking about this:
Source: https://bottomlineinc.com/health/sexual-wellness/sex-and-dementia-the-surprising-truth
I'm not a doctor or working in health care. But I did saw with my own eyes what Alzheimer's and dementia caused to my own grandmother and it was devastating. The mood swings, the hypersexuality around doctors and nurses. Dementia and Alzheimer's are a mental health issues that all old people currently face in some shape or form according with my experience, and while I'm not close to Stan Lee in no shape or form other than being a lifelong fan of his work, the things that are being described are textbook examples of elders facing dementia, which you can see on several studios published online:
Source: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3907317/
Bottom line is that I think that what we are probably witnessing here are two things: an old man facing dementia or Alzheimer's or both, like my own grandmother; and a health clinic using a former patient's mental health disease for financial gain through extortion. I'm a lawyer here in Brazil and I have pretty layman's knowledge about US laws, but I did some research and I'm pretty sure that regardless if what is alleged is true or not, the disclosure of this information goes against what in the US is called HIPAA laws (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) regarding privacy of the patients.
But why don't we know for a fact that Stan Lee has dementia or Alzheimer's, you ask. Why the lawyers simply won't come up and say this? Well, Stan Lee is more valueable "healthy" and operational for his family. Contrary to what many people think, he isn't a billionaire. He isn't responsible for Marvel Studios operations and neither he is the one that call the shots on making a Black Widow movie like I've seen implied on social media since the announcement that her film got a writer attached. Stan Lee is a 95 years old man that probably suffers from dementia, Alzheimer's or both, like most of the people that live that long, and while I agree with this sentiment:
I think it's important to understand that this is looking quite likely with a mental health issue, and not a sexual harassment one. Seeing Stan getting disrespected like that seems to hurt even more because I wish neither him or my grandmother had to fight diseases, I wish neither of them would die. But we all will sooner or later.
From what I've gathered from talking with nurses and doctors about this issue, this is a known and common issue among the elderly, one that health workers face and while it and you can ask literally ANY nurse with experience dealing with elder men and women out there - that this isn't about a privileged Hollywood old man but an old man fighting a disease, the same disease that miraculously never left my grandma forget who I was.
And let's be clear: I'm not discounting the trauma tha health workers face when dealing with cases of hypersexuality / mood swings / hallucinations among the elderly. But the understanding I have from situations like this is that nurses with experience to tackle the situation deal with this with compassion and authority, making them understand that they are going off limits.
I think that this discussion could benefit greatly if people with similar experiences with old people could share their stories make people that aren't aware that this is an actual health issue could share their stories and confirm what I'm talking about, and most of all if we could get testimonies from people that actually work in health care. I just don't think it's right to torch an elder person for their quite obvious health issues, regardless if Stan Lee's family are willing to disclose that to the public or not.
- Stan Lee's lawyers allegedly replied with the following statements:
"We are not aware of anyone filing a civil action, or reporting these issues to the police, which for any genuine claim would be the more appropriate way for it to be handled," Tom Lallas, Lee's lawyer, said in a statement to the site. "Instead, Mr. Lee has received demands to pay money and threats that if he does not do so, the accuser will go to the media. Mr. Lee will not be extorted or blackmailed, and will pay no money to anyone because he has done absolutely nothing wrong."
"Mr. Lee categorically denies these false and despicable allegations and he fully intends to fight to protect his stellar good name and impeccable character."
So even if the news are coming from the Daily Mail, we have a somewhat "official" response from Stan Lee's representatives about the subject.
- The watercooler conversations about how Stan Lee is yet another sexual predator in social media are already happening and regardless if we are talking about this here on Era or not, and it's honestly tearing me apart for the reasons I'll explain a little bit further. To sum up, I think that's a conversation worth having at least to shed some light on mental illness in elderly people.
Stan Lee and Jack Kirby are my heroes. I owe them one awful lot for all that they have created. He will always be important to me. I will always call him my spiritual grandpa and I don't care if he joked about not liking being called a grandpa before. Because he is my spiritual grandpa. He literally gave me a whole lot my entire life and I will always be thankful for that.
With that said, this is not about my obvious bias towards him. If these allegations were about him being a serial sexual predator that preyed upon women like other cases we have happening right now since Harry Weinstein survivors came forward (see also Jesse Lacey and Max Landis) I'd have no qualms on shrugging him off in a heartbeat, regardless how much I literally own him most of my best childhood memories.
Yes, I'm hurt because this old man is getting his name through the mudd in his old age. Is it because I'm a fanboy? No. It's because last year, my actual grandmother passed away. She was 82 years old and had Alzheimer's, and while my generation is tearing my hero and spiritual grandpa apart with no questions asked on social media, very few people are talking about this:
Q. Some dementia patients instead become hypersexual. What is the reason for that?
A. An estimated 7% to 20% of dementia patients do develop problematic sexual behaviors. Some patients experience normal sexual drives but at inappropriate times or places, while others experience hyperarousal. They become fixated on the act and can't be redirected, so they constantly try to get their partners to have sex or make inappropriate advances toward others. The reason is that, despite the decrease in brain cells and testosterone levels, there are other issues that can override that. The most common is the disintegration of the frontal lobe, which takes away inhibition. Also, lesions that develop in the pleasure centers of the brain can create a hypersexual state. And in some cases, antidepressant medication contributes to hypersexuality.
Source: https://bottomlineinc.com/health/sexual-wellness/sex-and-dementia-the-surprising-truth
I'm not a doctor or working in health care. But I did saw with my own eyes what Alzheimer's and dementia caused to my own grandmother and it was devastating. The mood swings, the hypersexuality around doctors and nurses. Dementia and Alzheimer's are a mental health issues that all old people currently face in some shape or form according with my experience, and while I'm not close to Stan Lee in no shape or form other than being a lifelong fan of his work, the things that are being described are textbook examples of elders facing dementia, which you can see on several studios published online:
Mr A was described lovingly by family as always being outgoing and having a great sense of humor. Over the past several years, he had become more withdrawn and apathetic. He reported a subjective sense of emotional lability with tearful episodes. His primary care physician subsequently started him on sertraline.
Other personality changes included occasional inappropriate comments or behaviors, including sexually inappropriate comments. Although Mr A had been impotent since 1991, he had recently experienced an increase in libido, requesting sexual activity 3 to 4 times per week. His wife found that she was extremely uncomfortable with her husband in a sexual manner and had told him that she no longer wished to engage in sexual activity with him. Consequently, he became angry and obsessive about sex. She stated that he would ask her for sexual relations and repeatedly question her as to why she did not wish to have relations with him. He continued to perseverate on this topic and talk with people and family members about sex in public settings, which was very uncharacteristic of him. He would also intermittently make self-deprecating statements and suggest that he would be better off committing suicide since he felt that he was "no longer a man."
Mr A admitted to vague psychotic features such as "feeling" the presence of people around him, which was quite distressing to him. He also experienced visual hallucinations of bugs and occasional visions of "blurred people," mainly occurring during the evening or early morning hours with a tendency to be precipitated by darkness.
Sexual disinhibition occurs in 2%–17% of patients with dementia (Burns et al, 1990). Sexually inappropriate behaviors may range from inappropriate comments and solicitations and inappropriate sexual activity (eg, masturbation in public places, exposing breasts or genitalia in public) to aggression related to sexual impulsivity. These behaviors occur with equal frequency in males and females (Burns et al, 1990).
Source: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3907317/
Bottom line is that I think that what we are probably witnessing here are two things: an old man facing dementia or Alzheimer's or both, like my own grandmother; and a health clinic using a former patient's mental health disease for financial gain through extortion. I'm a lawyer here in Brazil and I have pretty layman's knowledge about US laws, but I did some research and I'm pretty sure that regardless if what is alleged is true or not, the disclosure of this information goes against what in the US is called HIPAA laws (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) regarding privacy of the patients.
But why don't we know for a fact that Stan Lee has dementia or Alzheimer's, you ask. Why the lawyers simply won't come up and say this? Well, Stan Lee is more valueable "healthy" and operational for his family. Contrary to what many people think, he isn't a billionaire. He isn't responsible for Marvel Studios operations and neither he is the one that call the shots on making a Black Widow movie like I've seen implied on social media since the announcement that her film got a writer attached. Stan Lee is a 95 years old man that probably suffers from dementia, Alzheimer's or both, like most of the people that live that long, and while I agree with this sentiment:
I think it's important to understand that this is looking quite likely with a mental health issue, and not a sexual harassment one. Seeing Stan getting disrespected like that seems to hurt even more because I wish neither him or my grandmother had to fight diseases, I wish neither of them would die. But we all will sooner or later.
From what I've gathered from talking with nurses and doctors about this issue, this is a known and common issue among the elderly, one that health workers face and while it and you can ask literally ANY nurse with experience dealing with elder men and women out there - that this isn't about a privileged Hollywood old man but an old man fighting a disease, the same disease that miraculously never left my grandma forget who I was.
And let's be clear: I'm not discounting the trauma tha health workers face when dealing with cases of hypersexuality / mood swings / hallucinations among the elderly. But the understanding I have from situations like this is that nurses with experience to tackle the situation deal with this with compassion and authority, making them understand that they are going off limits.
I think that this discussion could benefit greatly if people with similar experiences with old people could share their stories make people that aren't aware that this is an actual health issue could share their stories and confirm what I'm talking about, and most of all if we could get testimonies from people that actually work in health care. I just don't think it's right to torch an elder person for their quite obvious health issues, regardless if Stan Lee's family are willing to disclose that to the public or not.