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Today I just learned that Fit Shaming is a thing

Jaguar King

Jaguar King

Member
Oct 25, 2017
115
A colleague of mine started going to the gym few days ago only to decide to quit later because she was fit shamed by her family and her friends for wasting her money and she should be more accepting of her body since everyone is fat these days and there is no reason to be fit.

Seriously is that even a thing? am I being lied by her so she doesn't wanna go to the gym anymore, she was really excited in her first days so you can imagine my surprise when she backed off.

Seriously what the fuck? I can't believe such a thing is real. Since when being healthy and trying to improve your body and your health is a shameful act?
 
Siggy-P

Siggy-P

Avenger
Mar 18, 2018
11,869
When I started going the gym I had family members who had spent my childhood calling me fat try to persuade me not to.

Jealousy is what it is. Plain and simple.
 
Sephzilla

Sephzilla

Herald of Stoptimus Crime
Member
Oct 25, 2017
17,493
I've legit heard people say things like "you looked better when you were a little heavier".

I chalk it down to jealousy in the end.
 
Astral

Astral

Member
Oct 27, 2017
28,400
You sweet Summer child. Some people get jealous as fuck when they see people lose weight, especially family. Some also just don't seem to understand how it even works. My mom will call me a skeleton one week and fat the next. She'll tell me that my weight is perfect and I shouldn't continue dropping it then a year later say that weight is too low
 
PlanetSmasher

PlanetSmasher

The Abominable Showman
Member
Oct 25, 2017
116,966
People will shame others for anything that doesn't fit their perceived norms. I get shamed all the time for being naturally very thin, even though I have serious body dysphoria about my weight and my inability to look the way I want. It's real fun.
 
Falchion

Falchion

Member
Oct 25, 2017
41,131
Boise
Yep. If your lifestyle makes other feels uncomfortable about their own choices, often they'll try to shame you out of it. Fuck the haters though.
 
TheIdiot

TheIdiot

Banned
Oct 27, 2017
2,729
I didn't know it had a name, but yeah that attitude is actually quite prevalent among people and circles that don't exercise. I know people at work that say certain things like not eating too late/too much for dinner, managing macro-nutrients, etc. etc. and they're pretty much met with eye rolls and the like when really they're... informed about nutrition and prioritizing their health lol.
 
KoopaTheCasual

KoopaTheCasual

Member
Oct 27, 2017
6,778
Astral said:
You sweet Summer child. Some people get jealous as fuck when they see people lose weight, especially family. Some also just don't seem to understand how it even works. My mom will call me a skeleton one week and fat the next. She'll tell me that my weight is perfect and I shouldn't continue dropping it then a year later say that weight is too low
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Ugh, I hate this so much. My mom is the exact same way.
 
UCBooties

UCBooties

Avenger
Oct 26, 2017
2,311
Pennsylvania, USA
I've seen it described as a "crabs in a bucket" mentality where people would rather pull their peers down than boost them up. It's rife in certain spaces. Misery loves company.
 
Lundren

Lundren

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,745
It's a real thing. Even trying to change your diet to be healthier is seen by some as a negative thing.
 
Kcannon

Kcannon

Member
Oct 30, 2017
5,671
lol "there is no reason to be fit".

Yeah, I don't wanna die early of health complications.
 
AzorAhai

AzorAhai

Member
Oct 29, 2017
6,724
Déjà vu this thread, no ?

But yes, it exists, and it's stupid. Most of the time it's unhealthy/lazy people, out of pure jealousy.
 
Maven

Maven

Banned
Oct 27, 2017
2,076
Earth
I do what's best for me and I don't care what others think. I like exercising and being fit. The ladies sure do love it
 
ConanEd

ConanEd

Alt account
Banned
Dec 27, 2018
1,033
You don't need to go to gym to exercise, and you don't need to dress in Under Armour to exercise. Just two 2 cents from me.
 

Deleted member 8561

user requested account closure
Banned
Oct 26, 2017
11,284
Deepwater said:
Are you sure your anecdote is reflective of an actual culture?
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It's definitely a thing. In America at least, depending on where you live/who you're around, being overweight is the "norm". Few years ago when I lost weight I was down to 170, which was still very much overweight for my size. I talked about losing more weight and got the whole "why, you're already skinny enough, I would be worried if you lost more".

This summer I was at ~150 and my dad kept saying I was anorexic and "a skeleton" (who is also very much on the obese scale of the weight spectrum).

So yea, it's a thing, and while this is anecdotal, you get patterns from hearing multiple anecdotal testimonies.
 
Black_Red

Black_Red

Member
Oct 27, 2017
2,929
I lost like 20 kg and everyone told me I look great, but a couple of people told me I look too skinny now, and a girl told that If I'm going ofr muscles to PLEASE dont get too big because it looks horrible.

In the end, you should just care on how YOU want to look, I think woman who are too muscular look bad (then it reaches a point where they use fake boobs because of the pecs), but if they feel great then good for them.
 
Doober

Doober

Banned
Jun 10, 2018
4,295
I've never seen it so blatant but I have been around bigger folks who talk mad trash about "skinny bitches" and spread memes about how bigger is better and whatnot.
 
Sho_Nuff82

Sho_Nuff82

Member
Nov 14, 2017
18,534
Some people just get upset when you change their pre-conceived notions of you. My mom thought it was cute to call me a "weekend warrior" like half a decade after I starting lifting for real (and I was regularly running 5/10ks). To her I was always going to be her chubby baby, and I was just pretending to be a fit athletic person.

Part of it is insecurity I imagine. If you can change your life and habits, it implies that they could as well, and that makes people self conscious.
 

Deleted member 18742

User requested account closure
Banned
Oct 27, 2017
2,834
Yeah my mom's side of the family does that to me all the time. Before I decided to truly treat my achilles tendonitis and various leg problems I accumulated over the year for a multitude of reasons, I was doing 30-40 miles a week along with lifting 2-3 times a week all the time for track. I would get judged and shit for doing that. I don't really talk to them over that and but more so being closest racist, homophobic, etc.
 
whatsinaname

whatsinaname

Member
Oct 25, 2017
15,111
Jaguar King said:
A colleague of mine started going to the gym few days ago only to decide to quit later because she was fit shamed by her family and her friends for wasting her money and she should be more accepting of her body since everyone is fat these days and there is no reason to be fit.

Seriously is that even a thing? am I being lied by her so she doesn't wanna go to the gym anymore, she was really excited in her first days so you can imagine my surprise when she backed off.

Seriously what the fuck? I can't believe such a thing is real. Since when being healthy and trying to improve your body and your health is a shameful act?
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Look up the HAES and Fat Acceptance movements if you want even more WTFness.
 
Galkinator

Galkinator

Chicken Chaser
Member
Oct 27, 2017
9,030
They can't deal with their own asses being lazy, so they choose to sit back and criticize other peoples' healthy life choices to make themselves feel better.

Seriously, shaming someone for trying to get healthier and look better is downright fucking stupid.
 

Deleted member 13328

Avenger
Oct 27, 2017
5,247
Falchion said:
Yep. If your lifestyle makes other feels uncomfortable about their own choices, often they'll try to shame you out of it. Fuck the haters though.
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"Congrats on the weight loss, you look great." Two days later. "Come on, have some cake, don't be like that. Don't be so boring"

I've had random older dudes coming up to me trying to get their hands around my biceps at bars. I've overheard dudes talking about the size of my back, that it's not natural and so on.

ConanEd said:
You don't need to go to gym to exercise.
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That's true, but your goals does matter as well.
 
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Joe_Bush

Joe_Bush

Member
Oct 27, 2017
277
Kansas
ConanEd said:
You don't need to go to gym to exercise, and you don't need to dress in Under Armour to exercise. Just two 2 cents from me.
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The under armour thing yeah I understand but people wanna feel comfort when exercising. But going to a physical place to exercise while being surrounded by other people exercising can be helpful both psychologically to keep one going and physically to provide a variety of opportunities (machines, weights, cardio equipment etc) which one couldn't necessarily get outside of the gym. You can absolutely jog if that's what you want to do but a good gym will provide you with more than most places will
 
QuantumZebra

QuantumZebra

Attempted to circumvent ban with alt account
Banned
Oct 27, 2017
2,304
Lundren said:
It's a real thing. Even trying to change your diet to be healthier is seen by some as a negative thing.
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Yea I got never ending shit from co-workers, friends, family, etc... when I went on a year-long diet change / weight lifting binge. I got sick of being overweight and out of shape.

Fast forward, best shape of my life, and people who pointed out me being overweight say things like "OK Jenny Craig (insert fitness personality here)" anytime I discuss it with other people.
 
striderno9

striderno9

The Fallen
Oct 31, 2017
2,360
New York, NY
I've recently lost about 15 lbs and I did it through going to the gym every other day and not eating as bad as I used to. Because of this, my brother makes comments about me going overboard and suggesting a diet isn't much of a factor. My brother is overweight and said he wanted to lose the weight together. He hasn't lost a pound. I don't say anything other than what works for me personally.
 
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vestan

vestan

#REFANTAZIO SWEEP
Member
Dec 28, 2017
24,777
I've seen my Mom do this

Some people are just mad jealous
 
Black_Red

Black_Red

Member
Oct 27, 2017
2,929
Hjod said:
"Congrats on the weight loss, you look great." Two days later. "Come on, have some cake, don't be like that. Don't be so boring"
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It's different though, I hard to me to avoid eating when hanging out with friends, but to be honest, I like that the try to force some junk food on me, or I'd feel guilty to eat/drink and like's too short.

I dont have a problem with eating healthy every day in work, going to gym and running, but those little times with my friends should be about just having fun.
 
DrewFu

DrewFu

Attempted to circumvent ban with an alt-account
Banned
Apr 19, 2018
10,360
I think it usually happens when someone thinks being "fit" means being skinny (like a twig). Being skinny does not look good. Similarly when there was that fad for women to get SUPER lean some years back, and they'd get all veiny and sinewy. That also was not a good look.

Some folks do take their weight loss too far, and that isn't fit shaming.
 
Aaron

Aaron

I’m seeing double here!
Member
Oct 25, 2017
18,077
Minneapolis
Hjod said:
"Congrats on the weight loss, you look great." Two days later. "Come on, have some cake, don't be like that. Don't be so boring"
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Yeah this is some shit. Same with drinking and smoking. Everyone wants everyone else to have the same vices so they don't feel bad about it.
 
Dernhelm

Dernhelm

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
5,422
It's definitely a thing, though it doesn't originate from the same place as say fat shaming. With fat shaming, it's picking on someone you perceive as being worse off than you, or even just projecting what you fear you may look like. With things like fit shaming, there is a whole lot of jealousy at seeing someone do something positive about themselves. It's not even exercise, it's learning new life skills, trying out new hobbies, attempting to meet new people etc. The amount of fear people have from leaving their comfort zones is staggering at times, to the point they'd rather make another person miserable for trying to be better than admit they're too lazy or feeble to try it themselves.
 
striderno9

striderno9

The Fallen
Oct 31, 2017
2,360
New York, NY
TheLostBigBoss said:
It's definitely a thing. In America at least, depending on where you live/who you're around, being overweight is the "norm". Few years ago when I lost weight I was down to 170, which was still very much overweight for my size. I talked about losing more weight and got the whole "why, you're already skinny enough, I would be worried if you lost more".

This summer I was at ~150 and my dad kept saying I was anorexic and "a skeleton" (who is also very much on the obese scale of the weight spectrum).

So yea, it's a thing, and while this is anecdotal, you get patterns from hearing multiple anecdotal testimonies.
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Curious, how tall are you? I am trying to get down to 170 lbs. A decade ago when I was at 175 my wife told me I looked too skinny but for my height 5'8" I thought it looks fine.
 
Addi

Addi

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,329
I have definitely heard that sort of comments (though fit shaming might sound a bit extreme). "Working out at the gym is douchy", "You shouldn't care about your looks, it's vain", "I only go for runs in the woods because I don't won't to look big and unnatural".
 

Deleted member 13328

Avenger
Oct 27, 2017
5,247
QuantumZebra said:
Yea that happened 24/7 at work. People would literally bring me donuts. I'm like "fuckin really?".
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I know that feeling.

Black_Red said:
It's different though, I hard to me to avoid eating when hanging out with friends, but to be honest, I like that the try to force some junk food on me, or I'd feel guilty to eat/drink and like's too short.

I dont have a problem with eating healthy every day in work, going to gym and running, but those little times with my friends should be about just having fun.
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I'm not saying you're not allowed or supposed to eat what you want some days. I do as well, my point was more that some people feel so insecure just because you eat healthy they try to guilt you in to eating just as bad as them.
 

Deleted member 38573

User requested account closure
Banned
Jan 17, 2018
3,902
DrewFu said:
I think it usually happens when someone thinks being "fit" means being skinny (like a twig). Being skinny does not look good. Similarly when there was that fad for women to get SUPER lean some years back, and they'd get all veiny and sinewy. That also was not a good look.

Some folks do take their weight loss too far, and that isn't fit shaming.
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ummmm wat. people have preferences
 
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