No that's a good point, and I would defer to her judgement and experiences as well. Look, domestic abuse is a complicated subject. In many cases its an isolated incident brought on by outside stressors and not a pattern of behavior. I can understand how a victim of a one time assault from a partner would be willing to forgive and recontextualize the situation given those factors. Perhaps that WAS the situation with Heard's previous partner, and then her behavior escalated with Depp.I recall her being inconsistent about that in a way that confused me. Of course it wouldn't be the first time that a victim would be ambivalent about calling their experience "abuse" in public just as a matter of personal judgment and not out of fear of reprisal. I tend to lean on respecting the victim's judgement in terms of commentary though it carries the risk of, well, the abuser continuing to behave the way they do uninhibited like in this case.
For a while this was how I parsed the circumstances. It is kind of amazing the degree to which Heard's behavior is done out of a very explicit malice with explicit awareness of the context of her actions. I guess we'll see if there's anything she has to offer with more substance than "the people against me are bots" but at this point I doubt it.
Like you, I thought it was a mutually abusive situation for a while as well (and thus was not interested in condemning Depp specifically for behavior they both engaged in equally), but all this evidence makes it clear that the abuse was lopsided on her part, she was AWARE of how abusive her behavior was and continued engaging in that behavior anyway, and specifically used society's lack of empathy for male victims to continue to abuse Depp. Meanwhile Depp repeatedly tried to leave the abusive situation and diffuse it.