on the one hand I loathe dating apps, but on the other hand I feel like people have too high expectations for what they're trying to get out of them.
I have always loved dating apps. It was always so easy to get dates and find interesting people. My first go around led to a year-long relationship and I met my current partner of 4 years on Tinder too. I never understood why people are so against them. Its just like an initial bump to get people together, its not supposed to guarantee you anything, just get it going.
(how tall are you btw)
like I somewhat agree with this post, it's meant to help get your foot in the door not promise you a relationship or anything. It will always be easier to form a more genuine connection once you meet someone in person since you can actually emote and rely on things other than text and pictures, but also dating apps suck, it's super impersonal, and you need to have the exact right percentages of witty, good pictures, and attractiveness to succeed, so idk.
I'm not sure if dating is harder now than it used to be, or if as a culture we are just becoming more stressed, depressed, and less willing to interact socially (in the United States at least) due to terrible work policies, lack of health care, low wages, etc.
I can't help but feel that if people were less stressed in their individual lives it would be easier to meet people and the like
It's fucking hard for me, majority of people just want to hook up, to the point is being detrimental to my emotional health because people have told and told me that I'm a good looking guy, and I get that, often at bars or clubs I get some really long looks at me. But I'm awkward as fuck to start a conversation and also I'm demissexual, so that means I see no point in making a effort to start a conversation in a bar or club because the majority of times it leads to some kind of hook-up where you never speak to that person ever again in your life, and that's not my style and will never be, I had my fair share of hook-ups and all of them I had problems with having sex because I couldn't feel an emotional bond, and that was heartbreaking for me and also because I felt bad for the other person.
In turn, since I fucking suck at physically approaching someone, I turn to online dating apps, such as Tinder, but it's also a problem because majority of people there are also looking for hook-ups, once in a blue moon you will find someone who you can develop a emotional bond with. My matches started to get really low after I mentioned that I'm demissexual on my bio, let's not to mention the ghosts you get while messaging.
Basically, feels like there isn't such a thing as getting emotionally involved with someone and society as nowadays likes to hook-up generally.
it seems like a shitty thing, but if you aren't getting success with online dating by mentioning you are demisexual, you should probably just not put it in your bio. I'm not really sure what the point of advertising that is other than limiting the amount of people who might be willing to give you a chance.
I am also leaning towards demisexual, but it's not something I would mention ever until there would be a reason for it to come up in conversation. I also think you are overthinking too much, and you being demisexual shouldn't be a reason for you not to talk to someone. You never know how things will play out, you are kind of shooting yourself in the foot there. A lot of it is a numbers game, just like anything else you have to go through 100 people just to find the one that you might have an actual shot with. It sucks, but you kind of just have to get lucky.
Anyways, sorry for playing arm chair psychologist, I just feel like you are limiting yourself (I do the same thing tbh) by thinking this way. I completely understand being discouraged (I am by no means very successful with women either..._) but you really don't know the outcome until you try. And if it doesn't work out, what else is there to do but try again?
en.wikipedia.org
