Ghosting someone because you don't feel that you can help them isn't great either. But it really doesn't fall on OP to fix his friend or anyone if he doesn't feel up to it. Taking care of yourself and your own mental health should always come first, and if you have to put some distance between you and someone else, then that's what you have to do. This tough love approach that was used here is a lot more detrimental because its actively tearing him down and telling him what a terrible person he is and how much he's hurting you and putting a drain on your life. This actually is projecting a little bit, but when I was at my lowest, the feelings that I was hurting others or being a burden was the number one feeling that pushed me to the brink. And having that shoved in my face by someone that I would consider a friend would have absolutely sent me over the edge.
That's what I mean by its possible to do more harm than good when you respond to someone, and its important to really think about the way that our words will impact people who are reaching out.
There are ways to be supportive and help someone that doesn't involve doing what OP did. It doesn't make you an enabler to not rant at someone for 40 minutes about all of their failures.
