OP, I don't want to sound harsh, but you sound like a case of arrested development. You have given the last ten years of your life to a loveless marriage and raising kids which, had you known what you were getting yourself into at the time, you could have avoided entirely and spent that time developing yourself and your career.
This isn't at all to begrudge you at all for being stay at home dad, which is in honorable and tough job. My point is you should value yourself monetarily for the work you've done and realize wife should be compensating you for it. 50% of whatever she has and earns should go to you for raising those kids.
It is not in your best interest to stay in the current living situation. In order for you to grow and find your own identity, you need to move out and move on, while still maintaining a relationship with the kids. While your kids are "fine" with the situation now, I do not know if the behavior you are modeling is ultimately a positive one for your kids to see, and you need to take some autonomy for yourself before the new girlfriend forces you out.
This isn't at all to begrudge you at all for being stay at home dad, which is in honorable and tough job. My point is you should value yourself monetarily for the work you've done and realize wife should be compensating you for it. 50% of whatever she has and earns should go to you for raising those kids.
It is not in your best interest to stay in the current living situation. In order for you to grow and find your own identity, you need to move out and move on, while still maintaining a relationship with the kids. While your kids are "fine" with the situation now, I do not know if the behavior you are modeling is ultimately a positive one for your kids to see, and you need to take some autonomy for yourself before the new girlfriend forces you out.